MEW Holiday Poem 
 By: Masked Mister 


Twas the night before an MEW Christmas, And some called him Santa, others didn't bother to ask, but this man, who they knew, first name was Masked
Through to the air, and he almost got a blister, oh yes, oh yes, of course: the Masked Mister! 
Out of the bedroom and right by the toilet's flow; his archenemy, Jiggie Joe! 
He spoke " Let's fight to the death, both you and me, Joe, and we'll see who goes how slow." 
And Jiggie snorted and he retorted, " Not by hair on my head; I'm not fighting, I'm going back to bed." 
Rebel came out and said to them both, natch, " All right, that's it, you two are running a Gaunlet Match." 
Their jaws dropped in shock, and to the Rebel they said, " But it's eight o'clock!" 
And, not by a sending of a Christmas card, out the first entry came: Hardcore Richard. 
Of course, there was always rucas, so next of course, was Zakas. 
Yet, without a cookie, there was a third, called Nookie.
And so, he did, and out came Boxcar Sid. 
And when they heard a racist say "Kike!", and of course, who else but Mix Master Mike?
And the next guy wasn't riley, it was Mr. Smiley. 
When there was nothing left to take or even left whole, out came returning DEW Tag Team Champs Rake and Pole. 
And this week, Santa said "Ha ha ha", 'course, then followed by No-Ha. 
Then came pizza from Mario, and out came Pedro.
And yet, one more, of course all hairy, and out pops Ghost, of Too Scary. 
Mister cried, " Eleven! Eleven! Rebel, we're done; can we go home and have some holiday fun?"
By a the toss of a pebble and a few cans, out came the Rebel with a mic in his hands.
" I guess you have proven yourselves worthy, but there's one more opponent you two must face: me." 
Ran Rebel to the ring with such a big wham, followed by a nice bodyslam.
And all the rukus that came to be, it ended all with a nice 3-D, and a pin, 1-2-3! 
Jiggie cried, "That's it, I hate Christmas, and all who are such holiday kinks, go to hell, you old bastard, and someone, get me a drink!" 
And, to the Christmas cards we send, that MEW Christmas came to an end.