“Maybe a few, but mostly questions” Harry replied “If you *do* end up with Snape.... Is he going to be my... uhm... dad?” Harry could hardly manage to get the words out, the thought was just to alien. “I mean would he live with us?”

Cat took one look at the expression on Harry’s face and burst out laughing “I’m sorry sweetie, .. I don’t mean to laugh, but the look on your face.” she covered her mouth with her hand as she tried to make herself stop “Oh Harry, ... is it really that horrible a thought to you? Do you dislike Severus that much?” she asked honestly, his opinion would matter a great deal in any decisions she may be forced to make.

Harry was going to tell her yes, until he saw her eyes, she seemed so tired and sad. Then he remembered the way Snape had cared for her when she was hurt, according to Remus he had saved her life, and Harry had seen the tenderness and compassion Snape was capable of himself. “I don’t know.... I guess he’s just not what I had in mind” Harry answered vaguely, not wanting to upset her again.

“Really?” Cat asked softly “Can you tell me what sort of man you would like as a father?”

Harry gave her a goofy grin, until he saw she was completely serious “You mean it? I don’t know...” he thought for a moment “He would have to be nice, and kind of course. Being able to play Quidditch would be great” he and Cat laughed “I would like someone who I could talk to, like I can with you. Ohh, and he would have to be handsome, I wouldn’t want you to marry anyone ugly, I want to have cute brothers and sisters” Harry grinned widely as Cat’s eyes grew wide.

“Harrrrryyyy” Cat whined “gheez, not only do you want a father,.. NOW you’re pestering to be a brother! Sheesh” she put her head into her hands “you’re trying to drive me mad, aren’t you?”

Harry gave her a lop-sided grin “Hey, you’re the one who asked me.” he reminded her. “I would have been perfectly happy to talk about the holidays. You’re the one who brought up marriage.” he didn’t even bother ducking as the pillow swung at him.

“Boy you’re acting more and more like James every day young Potter” she teased as she stuck out her tongue. “And why don’t we change the topic,... holidays sound safe enough.. . are you ready to go?”

Harry smiled “Ready??? I can’t wait” his eyes twinkled as he thought of it “Do you think they’ll like me? How long will it take to get there? What should I bring for gifts?” his mind was racing with so many questions, he couldn’t wait to go, to be part of a family.

Cat shook her head “Harry.... sweetie, calm down.” she rolled her eyes, “I have never known you to be this excitable before. Yes they will *love* you, it won’t take long at all. And don’t bother bringing anything... although we should go get something for your friends. Have you had a chance to pick up anything for Hermione, Ron or Ginny?”

Harry shook his head as he crawled across her bed to get some food off of the breakfast tray “No, not yet. We usually get something in Hogsmeade right before the holiday break. Maybe this time you can come with us.” Harry said cheerfully “Hey!! Look who’s here!” he added as Shashe jumped on the bed. “How did she get in? Your door is closed I saw Remus lock it myself. . ”

Cat smiled “Trust me Harry, there is a lot more to Shashe than you think. Isn’t that right baby?” she said as the small cougar rubbed up against Cat. “Did Sirius send you? Trust him to be all worried and over protective” she cooed “and who does he send to protect us.. Shashe..” Cat smiled at Harry’s confused gaze, as much as she wanted to tell him, he just wasn’t ready to learn about the myriad of magical beings that inhabited the world outside the Ministry’s narrow view.

Harry laughed as the cougar rolled on her back, allowing Cat to scratch her tummy. “I can’t believe she lets you do that to her. Ron tried that one time and nearly lost a finger.” He watched as Cat grinned and winked at him “I guess you haven’t heard anything about my adoption yet, have you?”

“No Harry, and to be honest I don’t expect to for quite a while” Cat said softly “Is there something you wanted to know? Or something you wanted to say?” Cat asked hesitantly, she was terrified that Harry had changed his mind after the last few days.

“I was just wondering, if they don’t say anything by the end of school.... where will I go? I really don’t want to go back to the Dursley’s.” Harry asked softly, he would rather stay with Snape than go back to Surrey. He couldn’t bear the thought of living without the affection he had grown so used to over the past few weeks.

Cat reached out and touched Harry’s cheek “Hey sweetie” she said softly “I told you before, it doesn’t matter what the MoM says. You’re *my* son and you will live with me. And if they don’t like it, they can make the incredibly stupid decision to try and take you.” she finished smiling wickedly “I can assure you, neither Cash nor I will find it amusing.”

“Do you think you and Cash can take on the whole Ministry?” Harry asked hesitantly “I mean they do have aurors and everything.” the last thing he wanted was to be taken from her by anyone, she had become his mother, he knew it in his heart and his soul.

“True, but if it comes down to it, and I think we need any back-up” she turned and smiled innocently “I would simply call for Mac Lir, he would *never* stand for anyone stealing his children”

“His children? I’m his child now?” He asked confused “I know I’m part of his clan, but.....”

“If you’re part of his clan, you are his child. He’s too old to be bothered with details, his family, his child, his responsibility period.” Cat replied as she rolled her eyes, “You should see him and my da get into it... ohhh brother!” she laughed softly “ You just would not believe the things they actually *find* to argue over... eat some more Harry... I don’t want your little friend to feel slighted again. He seemed a bit upset that Sirius and I didn’t eat everything on our plates last night.”

There conversation was interrupted by a knock on Cat’s outer door. She nodded to Harry who ran to answer it “Hello Madame Pomfrey” Harry said, slightly shocked to see her away from the hospital wing.

“Hello Mr. Potter, where is she?” Poppy asked “Its time for her potions, and I am not taking no for an answer.”

Harry raised his hands in surrender “She’s in bed just like Remus told her.” he said as he pointed towards Cat’s bedroom. He heard Cat yell out “traitor” from her bed, he laughed as Pomfrey rolled her eyes.

“Well at least you and Professor Lupin seem to be able to make her listen” Poppy commented as she walked towards Cat. “Although I do not want the two of them as patients together ever again.”

“Fine by me Poppy” Cat agreed “and I’m sure Remus would agree as well. We can always recover together here.” she grinned as Poppy gave her a look. Cat blushed softly as she remembered Poppy mistaking Sirius’s visit for Remus’s, she could only imagine what was going through Poppy’s mind at this moment.

Harry laughed “That’s all we would need, I’ve seen the two of you when you’re together. This place would be covered in snowball and water balloons or something.”

Poppy gave Harry a stern look “Don’t give her any ideas Mr. Potter, she gets into enough trouble without any help.” she gave Cat a quick going over “Mr. Potter, I need you to step outside for a few moments. I need to give Miss MacLeod a more detailed exam” she said as she clicked her tongue. Decidedly unhappy about the new bruises than had appeared on Cat’s body.

“Why?! What’s wrong? Should I get someone?” Harry asked anxiously “Is she getting worse again?”

“Harry calm down” Cat said gently “Poppy is just being careful, my heart is still weak and she wants to make sure its healing properly. I need to take off my nightgown and you are not going to be in the room for this. Understand” she asked as she winked at his blushing.

“Oh.. Right...” Harry replied awkwardly “I’ll be ... uhm... out there somewhere.. Doing .. Something”

Cat giggled at him “Harry, why don’t you find my guitar, I’ll teach you to play if you like. Its out there by my sewing basket I think” she grinned as Harry smiled back at her, relieved to leave the room without anymore conversation.

As soon as Harry closed the door Cat and Poppy looked at each other and laughed at Harry’s reaction. “So I hear that you intend to adopt Harry” Poppy said as Cat removed her nightgown “I always wondered why you didn’t take him years ago. I remember you and Lily Evans quite well, I would have sworn you two were twins or at the very least sisters. Take a deep breath and hold it in” Poppy said as she listened to Cat’s heart “I don’t suppose you’ve thought this through? You must know the Ministry won’t agree, and what about a father? A boy needs a father.”

Cat shook her head “I know the Ministry will refuse, but I don’t care. And Harry and I were just talking about what he considers important in a father. If I didn’t know any better I would think he wanted Remus as a father.” Cat gasped as Poppy placed her finger where the burns from Severus’s spell had been “that’s still a bit tender”

“So I’ve noticed, I also noticed the bruises, same reason as before I assume.” Poppy said with concern “and I’m not surprised about his choice. He and Professor Lupin spend a great deal of time together. They even have tea once a week, right before quidditch practice if I recall.”

“Really? That’s so sweet” Cat smiled “and how do you know all of this. Have you become a gossip Poppy?”

“If I were I would be pumping you for information about your relationships with Professors Lupin and Snape. Not giving you advice. Does it hurt when you breathe deeply? What about when you laugh?”

“Nope, no pain at all.” Cat replied “what do you mean pumping me for information... what information would I have?”

Poppy sat down on the bed and rolled her eyes at Cat “You have been gone a long time my dear. You have no idea what Severus Snape has been like these past years. I heard you tease him about his reputation as a strict and fear inspiring teacher, well it is well-earned, even the other professors are frightened of him. But whenever you’re around... well its quite another story.” she winked “you have a noticeable effect on his mood my dear. And believe me, the entire school has noticed.”

Cat stared at her “Are you serious? Is he really so harsh towards people? I know he is very strict with his student, but I’ve always assumed that was because his course is so dangerous. I remember very well how many students you had to treat when Morano was potion mistress. But I don’t recall seeing any of his while I was in the hospital.”

“Well, that is true” Poppy agreed “he is definitely much more concerned with his students well-being than Morano ever was. He just seems to go about it in a strange way. Did you know I have actually had students swallow nightshade to get out of his class.” she laughed softly “but with you around, well I haven’t needed to use as many antidotes as usual.”

They heard a soft knock on Cat’s bedroom door “Madam Pomfrey... It’s Albus, is everything alright?”

“Yes Professor Dumbledore. Please wait there for a moment” Poppy replied as she helped Cat with her night gown. “It seems everyone is worried about you Catri...”

Cat smiled as Albus and Harry entered her room “Hello Albus, I’m surprised to see you here. I thought poppa would still be interrogating you about my *illness* as it were.”

“Ahh yes, Magnus ..” Albus smiled as he thought of his old friend “he and I discussed your situation for quite some time both last evening and again this morning. I managed to convince him this would have happened no matter where you were. And that you were being watched carefully at all times to prevent any further harm befalling you.”

“You know you are right Albus, this would have happened no matter were I was.” she assured him “Actually I’m very lucky it happened here, I was surrounded by people who were both intelligent and powerful enough to help me.” She watched as Harry and Albus beamed at each other.

“Well I am very happy and relieved to hear you say so” Albus said as he sat on the armchair, he smiled when he saw Harry sit on her bed next to her watching her carefully. “Of course in between your son and a certain *friend* of yours, I doubt anything will have the chance to happen to you again.” he winked at Harry “They both seem to be quite devoted to you” Albus chuckled as Cat blushed slightly, although not entirely sure to which friend he was referring to.

“Hmptf, he must be referring to Professor Lupin” Poppy said sarcastically as she winked at Cat “Heaven knows he seems to be the only person in this school you will listen to. Drink up Catri... I don’t want any arguments.”

Cat rolled her eyes and blushed “Poppy I keep telling you, Remus and I are friends.” she said as she quickly swallowed the potions. Thinking it over, Cat hesitated and looked at Harry, what if he did want Remus as his father? What would Remus say? He had told her time after time that Harry needed and deserved a family, would he be willing to re-think his decisions on marriage for Harry’s sake? “What do *you* think Harry?” she asked hesitantly.

Harry looked at Dumbledore, who was smiling madly as his blue eyes twinkled mischievously behind his glasses “Uhmm... I think we should discuss it later,” Harry replied slowly “I kind of want to discuss that with you. That is if you’re feeling up to it?” he quickly added. . .

@@@@@ “What do you mean you’re leaving!!! You can’t leave, MacLeod needs us!” Fang yelled as the other Garou cringed.

“Good for MacLeod” Gaz yelled back “I’m tired, I have kits to worry about, I am going home. You want to stay here and fight for her?” Gaz fumed at her former paramour “then stay, I don’t care.”

“You don’t care?!!!” Fang screamed “You have told me time after time how important it is for us to live up to the code, to show ourselves to be honorable among both the Garou and the Children of the Dana. Now you turn your back on them and on us.” Fang glared at her as the sunlight streamed through the skeletal trees, how could she do this, she had convinced them all to join her for the glory of the clan, for the honor of their kine. He waited in silence for her to speak.

Gaz narrowed her eyes at Fang, how could he do this, she had expected his support for her decision. He was the one who didn’t want to come here in the first place, he was the one who was terrified of Clan MacLeod, and now.... “It is obvious that your new friendship with MacLeod and her clan mean more to you than your own clan does.” Gaz spat “stay here, see if they accept you when we leave you a lone and unprotected among the wizards. See if they still revere your strength then.”

“What makes you think anyone is going to follow you?” Fang replied coldly “You brought us here with tales of glory and necessity, you talked of great battles that needed to be fought and won if we were to preserver. And now you turn you back on that, and on us.” Fang took a deep breath and did the only thing he could. He turned his back to her, and walked towards the other Garou “You heard her, it anyone wants to leave, go with her now. *I* am staying, I believe this battle is important to us and our future. I trust MacLeod and her clan, ... I like the way I am treated here. If anyone wants to stay here and fight, I will care for you... *I* won’t abandon you.” . . .

~@~@~@~@~@~ “No Harry, put your fingers on the frets like this” Cat explained “that’s it, now take you other hand and brush it down across the strings” she wrapped her hand around his as she showed him the motions “there, you see, its easy.”

Harry grinned back at her “Hey.. I did it. And it doesn’t sound that bad either” he laughed as Cat gave him a wonderfully warm smile. Harry loved it when they got to spend time together, she always made him feel like he was the center of her world. It was such a nice change from what he had known growing up, he had never been wanted, he had barely been tolerated, but Cat more than made up for that. Harry found it hard to imagine that there had ever been a time in his life when she hadn’t been there. He found himself wondering what would happen if the Ministry refused to allow Cat to adopt him, would they try to take him away? Would they force him to go back to the Dursley’s against his will? He shook the thoughts out of his mind as he heard Cat talking.

“Very good sweetie, now string it all together” she said softly “just move your fingers the way I taught you to make the chords.” She smiled proudly as Harry did as she asked. She flung her arms around him and squeezed him tightly as Shashe yowled happily at them “Harry that was wonderful, you’re learning so quickly” she beamed as the pride shown through her lovely deep green eyes.

Harry felt relieved that Dumbledore and Pomfrey had left, as much as he adored her fussing over him, it would have been embarrassing in front of them. Harry practiced a few more chords as he watched her writing on some strange paper. “What are you doing? I’ve never seen parchment like that before” he asked as he craned his neck to see her making dots and lines on the rows marked on the paper.

Cat smiled shyly as she blushed, “Just a song I’m writing... nothing important” she explained. She didn’t want to tell him this was her way of working through things, this was how she got things out in the open, so she could think about what was happening, and what to do about it. “I write from time to time. It keeps me busy I guess.”

Harry sat the guitar down and reached over, picking up a packet stuffed with songs Cat had written “You wrote all of this? Wow, can you play any of it?” he asked as he pulled a few sheets out, “and what kind of paper is this? The one with all the lines on it.”

“That’s called manuscript paper, its used for writing music. Those lines are the staffs, I draw a line through them to divide them into bars depending on how many beats I want. That decides the rhythm of the music. Three quarters time is a waltz, but four quarters time is the most commonly used” she explained “the top number tell you how many beats are in each bar and the bottom number tells you which note . . .you really don’t understand any of this do you?”

Harry grinned “Not really, but I would like to hear you sing something. Is that the one you’re working on now?”

“Yeah... its not done yet.” Cat replied and it wouldn’t be done until she figured out what was going on in her life. It was a song about her confusion and pain, and her hope “Are you sure you don’t want to hear something else? Something you know maybe?”

Harry didn’t know why but he really wanted to hear the one she was writing now “Can’t you play what you have done? I’ve never heard anyone writing a song before.”

Cat sighed as she took the guitar from Harry, “Alright, but be kind, I’ve only just started to write it. I don’t even have the lyrics the way I want them yet.”

Harry grinned as he heard Cat strum a few chords, he was amazed at how effortlessly she made it seem. He leaned back against the many pillows now littering her bed as he listened to her sing. Her voice always soothed him, it made him feel safe and warm inside, it made him feel loved and protected from everything and everyone that might try to hurt him.

Sirius laid on his cot and stared up at the ceiling, he couldn’t get the image of Cat out of his head. He had forgotten what a wonderful thing it was to sleep in her arms, he felt so safe and loved when she was near. Even last night, she was unconscious and weak as the proverbial kitten, but he still felt safe, as if her love could protect him from anything. He grabbed his pillow and tried to pretend she was still sleeping in his embrace, but it was no use, he wanted to hold her again, to feel her nuzzle against him. It had been so many years, it just wasn’t fair that he couldn’t be with her. How long would he be forced to pay for his mistakes?

Sirius tossed and turned as images flashed through his mind, Cat’s first day at Hogwarts, how timid and unsure she had looked when she was brought into the DaDA classroom. How shocked he and Remus had been when they had seen her, how willingly she joined their little group. She never had any problem playing pranks, that’s for sure. He remembered how it had broke his heart when he realized she and Remus had become more than friends, he never had the heart to tell Remus that he loved her too. After all, Remus was so shy around girls, and the way Cat used to look at him with her adoring eyes. . .how could he even think of her as a possible romance, she and Remus were perfect for each other. At least until that night in November, the night Remus had attacked her. Sirius grit his teeth when he remembered running through the forest with her limp, blood drenched body. She had been so cold, so pale, he wasn’t even sure she was still alive when he left her in the hospital wing. He had returned to her side as soon as he had helped James lock Moony back in the shrieking shack, he didn’t leave her, not once during the whole time, not until she opened her eyes and smiled up at him. .

“Arrgghh!!! This is so unfair” Sirius vented as he threw his pillow against the wall “Why can’t I be with her? I love her and she loves me....” Sirius fought hard to keep his tears from falling, he was so tired and frustrated, he had been on the run for far too long. His mind immediately flashed back to what Cash had said about calling a blood hunt for Peter Pettigrew. When Cash had first mentioned it, Sirius’s first reaction had been one of shock and horror, but the more he thought about it, the more it seemed to be his only option. Until he could prove Peter was alive and responsible for the deaths of all those innocent people, he could never live a real life. The Ministry had robbed him of everything, as a criminal he had no rights, no property, no money, he didn’t even have a name.... how could he ask Cat to marry him now?

Sirius paced across the room like a caged animal, he was tired of hiding, tired of having to sneak moments alone with Catri. He was going to talk to Cash tonight, Ron was sure to have something of Scabbers that still had Peter’s scent on it. But until then, Sirius was going to see Cat and Harry, even if he had to do it as a dog. They were his family and he was responsible for them period. And if Snape thought for one moment that he was going to take his family away... well things were going to get messy.

Sirius ran silently through the halls as Snuffles, he could hear Cat and Harry laughing with each other, and a guitar. Sirius smiled, I bet she’s teaching him how to play he thought as he rounded the corner. Looking to make sure no one was around he transformed to open her door, only to quickly revert to Snuffles when he heard Shashe yowling. Snuffles quietly slunk into Cat’s bedroom and sat silently as he watched Harry and Cat, she was thrilled about something, she was hugging Harry so tightly the poor boy could hardly breath. He watched as Cat tried to explain the particulars of writing music to him, only to have Harry turn it around and insist she sing one of her own songs.

Sirius slowly crept closer to her bed as he heard her strumming the guitar, he couldn’t wait to hear her sing. On the nights his father’s death would prey on his mind, he would rest his head on her lap as she stroked his hair, singing softly to him as he drifted off to sleep. Her voice was like an angel’s sigh, his heart melted away every time he had ever heard her sing for him.…

Its hard to stand next to a hard, hard, heart.
Beating close to mine
pounding up against the stone and steel
as this rain,... falls down.

sometimes the hurt is so deep, deep, deep
you think you’re going to drown
sometimes all I can do is weep, weep, weep
as this rain... falls down

strange how hard it rains now
rows and rows of great dark clouds
but I keep holding on underneath this shroud
craving.…

It hard to know when to give up the fight
some things you want will never be right
and I don’t want to beg you baby
for something you can never give.