Sirius yapped in agreement as Snape glared at him, something which Cat did not miss. "Severus, why do you not like Snuffles? What did he do? Bite you or something." She looked intently at him as she waited for an answer.

For a moment Severus actually thought about telling Catri the truth about the dog she was so affectionately petting, then thought better of it when he saw the look of innocent questioning in her eyes. She really had no idea why he despised the dog, Sev took a deep breath before replying "I guess I simply am not an animal lover like you are my dear" he turned to look at Sirius "In fact I find them very trying. To the point of hexing." he added as he raised his eyebrow.

Cat was about to say something when Harry interjected "Yeah... well... uhm.. Snuffles and I should probably get something to eat anyway..huh?.. Come on boy." Harry said nervously, all he needed was for Snape to tell Cat who Snuffles really was. "Come on boy..... before you get us in trouble." Harry was fairly certain Cat would be upset about his part in keeping the secret from her and he really didn't think the news would help her recover any quicker.

"A very wise idea Mr. Potter...." Severus agreed, then turned back to look at Sirius "You heard him *boy* ..... time to leave. Or shall I get a rolled up newspaper to encourage you?"

"Severus!!" Cat said, obviously shocked "that was uncalled for" she hugged Snuffles protectively "I happen to like this dog. He’s very well behaved, and extremely protective... he’s a good boy" the hurt in her voice was apparent.

Severus sighed... "Very well, he is a nice.... doggy..." he replied, barely disguising the loathing in his voice. Looking over at Harry, Severus gave him a meaningful look "Mr. Potter?..."

Harry quickly went to Cat and gave her a quick kiss on her cheek "I’ve really got to go.... besides, Snuffles is probably as hungry as I am" Harry grabbed Sirius by the scruff of his neck and gently tugged on him "Come on Snuffles.... lets go"

Cat waved goodbye as she watched Harry leave, then turned to Severus "That was *interesting*, please don’t tell me your jealous of a dog" she said tersely.

"No, not of the dog" Severus replied "Just all the attention you give him." he watched as Cat rolled her eyes. Smiling mischievously he continued "Tell me Miss MacLeod, could I expect the same treatment if I laid my head on your lap?" he asked suggestively.

Cat shook her head and laughed at the suggestion "Only if you grew fur Sev." She placed her head in her hand as she started giggling, it was just too silly a picture for her to hold the laughter inside. She hoped Sev wouldn’t take offense at her giggling.

Severus smiled brightly as he lifted her chin, and kissed her sweetly. "I do not imagine I would look very good in fur" he grinned as smiled back at him. "As for you my dear.." he said as he placed his hand on her thigh "back into bed. If Madam Pomfrey so much as thought you attempted to leave your bed." Severus shook his head as he made a *tsk, tsk* sound.

Cat rolled her eyes "Really Sev, Remus as a mommy is bad enough.." she said as she tucked her legs back under the blankets. Severus sat on the bed and took her hand in his, smiling softly, he ran his fingers along her cheek. He smiled as he felt her cheeks grow warm and flushed under his touch. Looking down, he noticed the book she had been reading "So in between animals and students, what have you been occupying yourself with?" he asked as he picked up her book. "Lord Alfred Tennyson" he seemed a bit surprised "I must say, I never really pictured you as enjoying Victorian literature"

"Are you joking? The Lady of Shalot, Charge of the Light Brigade..... they’re classics." she answered, somewhat hurt by his comment. It annoyed her when people assumed she didn't have a brain.

Severus smiled as he kissed her hand "My apologies, I simply pictured you enjoying something more.... modern. I did not mean to offend you" he said as he gazed into her eyes "Do you mind?" he asked as he gestured to the book. He remembered how much she loved to hear him read, and at this moment he needed every advantage he could get.

Snuffles had to run to keep up with Harry, who was fuming at he and Snape. "What is it with you two? And what were you thinking?" Harry yelled as he threw his arms into the air "He could have told her who you were, and seeing as its obvious she has no clue, I’m betting YOU didn’t bother tell her." he admonished his godfather.

Sirius transformed and ran to catch up with his godson "Harry.. Calm down. And I have very good reasons for not telling her the truth." he replied as he placed his hand on Harry’s shoulder "Besides, it looks as if it doesn’t matter anymore" he sighed deeply "She’s obviously in love with *him*, I’m not even a consideration anymore." he said sadly.

Harry looked up as Sirius "I don’t believe that." he said firmly "I know Snape is really nice when she’s around, but how long can that last. She’s going to see him for what he is." thinking for a moment he added "You saw how upset she got when he threatened Snuffles."

"I also saw how quickly he got out of it..... and how she was playing with him, tickling and teasing him.... the way she used to with me." Sirius could feel the tears threatening to spill. He had to get over this, get over her, he just didn't know how or if he wanted to. She had become his life, even after she had left the school he kept looking for her. He kept hoping she would be at Lily's wedding, he even had the engagement ring in his pocket. He had sworn to himself that if he ever found her again, he would never let her go.

"So why don’t you just go up to her and talk to her?" Harry asked "If you two were so in love, how much could have changed? You never stop loving the people you care about, right?"

Sirius looked into Harry’s eyes, how could he tell him. How could he explain that people could be driven to indifference, even hate by thoughtlessness, by cruelty caused by nothing more than sheer stupidity. "Sometimes Harry.... it just isn’t enough" he said softly as he hung his head with guilt and shame.

"How can love not be enough?" Harry asked "You and Cat have both told me time after time all you need is heart. Or doesn’t that count when you get older?" Harry said as he gave Sirius a truly penetrating look.

Sirius gulp, this was not going to be easy. How was he ever going to be able to explain to a fifteen year old boy how something he did over seventeen years ago could still have repercussions to this very day. More to the fact, how could he tell his godson it was all his fault that Harry would never have the family he so desperately needed and deserved. "Heart is very important Harry, but sometimes,... sometimes things happen. Stupid, thoughtless things..."

Harry looked at Sirius, he was getting that haunted look again. "She doesn’t know anything, does she?" he asked softly "You never told her about Azkaban, or Pettigrew... or anything, did you?"

Sirius could hear the disappointment in Harry’s voice, it hurt him, but Harry had ever right to feel that way. "No Harry, I haven’t told her.... I guess I’m just to frightened of what she will do when she finds out. I don’t want to lose her, not again."

"You’re going to lose her now if you don’t do something" Harry yelled loudly, snapping Sirius out of his thoughts. "Or weren’t you paying attention to what was happening in there? Snape is playing at Prince Charming. Is that what you want? Her and Snape?" Harry was fuming now, never would it have crossed his mind that Sirius would be afraid of anything, certainly not of Cat, how could anyone be afraid of her. Harry turned his back to Sirius as he crossed his arms across his chest. "I’d rather be an orphan than call Snape *dad*, I don’t care how nice he’s being to her."

Sirius jumped as Harry yelled, it wasn’t like him to be so temperamental. He stood there with his jaw hanging open as Harry went on about love, and his past, and particularly about Cat and Snape. He watched as Harry turned his back on him, he had never behaved like this before, not to him. Sirius thought . Sirius waited a few seconds before he spoke "Don’t you think I want to be with her, to give you a family.... maybe even start one of my own." he said as his voice became thick with emotion, he could feel the tears streaming down his face "But its not that easy Harry, you just don’t understand...... I did something to her, ... years ago...... she’s never forgiven me." he whispered as Harry turned to face him.

Harry was about to start yelling again when he saw Sirius’s face, he was crying like a child, he had no idea how much this must be hurting him. "Sirius?" Harry asked timidly as he approached his godfather "Sirius... it can’t be that bad.... I mean its Cat...." Harry paused as he remembered Cat’s reactions the first few times he had mentioned Sirius’s name. Taking a deep breath Harry asked the inevitable question "Sirius... what did you do to her?" . . . .

Severus watched as Catri melted to the sound of his voice, he was so happy to finally have some time alone with her. He finished the last line and smiled as she snuggled against him, it felt so wonderful to have her next to him. Deciding to take a chance, Severus took a small package out of his robes, it was wrapped in silver paper and tied with a bright green bow. "I hope you do not mind" he said softly as he presented the gift to her. "I would have given to you earlier, but I wanted to be alone with you when you saw it. I hope you like it."

Cat had been lost in the sound of his voice, he had the most gorgeously deep voice she had ever heard and he knew how much she loved to hear him read, especially to her. Cat blushed as he presented the beautifully wrapped gift to her, although she hesitated slightly before taking it. "Severus, you really should stop spoiling me like this" she told him as she felt his fingers caressing her face once again. "You buy me far to many gifts, you know you don’t have to."

"That is exactly the point, I do not *have* to,... I want to" he replied as he kissed her cheek. "I enjoy making you happy, and I especially enjoy spending time with you. I hope to be able to spend much more with you shortly." He told her as he rested his head against her’s. "Go on... open it." he encouraged.

Cat looked up to see Sev smiling happily at her, it was nice to see him happy, and even nicer to know she was part of the reason. "Just seeing you and Harry getting along makes me happy Sev. I don’t need presents....." she paused as she watched his smile grow even wider. "What aren’t you telling me Sev? It there something in here I should be concerned about?" she asked, begining to feel nervous.

"That would depend entirely on your definition of *concerned*, if you mean will it explode. ... No, of course not" he said, as he chuckled, "however if you mean concerned as in it may mean more that what it appears, ..... most definitely yes" he whispered as he kissed her tenderly.

Cat’s mind raced, she had several ideas of what it could be. With any luck it would not be anything too serious, as much as she cared for Sev, she just wasn’t ready to agree to anything that permanent. She had finally gotten Harry back, and as much as she loved him, it was a huge adjustment in her life. No more jaunting off at a moments notice, or doing something on a whim. She had gladly given up a large portion of her freedom for Harry’s sake, he was her son, and she would do anything for him. But a husband was another story entirely, and at the moment Cat felt she needed all the freedom she had left, or at least as much as her family would allow her before forcing the issue. Cat could feel her hands tremble as she carefully unwrapped the gift oh please, please, please.. Do NOT let this be an engagement ring she prayed. . .

Harry stood there, somewhat impatiently "Well Sirius.... What did you do that was so horrible you think Cat won’t forgive you?" He sighed loudly as Sirius stood there in silence "Fine.. I guess I’ll just have to ask Remus.. Or Cat for that matter"

"NO." Sirius nearly shouted "Harry, ... you can’t .... she’s been through enough." Sirius slumped his shoulders and hung his head "It would be too much for her to bear, especially now, after last night." He sobbed softly "She .... we almost lost her. Her heart stopped, I heard everything. Poppy won’t even let her out of bed. She’s afraid it will kill her."

Harry paused as his breath caught in his throat "But she’s better now ... I was just with her. She’s still a little weak, but she seems....." He stopped as Sirius lifted his head to look into Harry’s eyes.

"She’s still weak Harry" Sirius whispered "I staid with her all of last night and all day, up until I left with you. I never left her side, not once." he explained sincerely "Poppy was hovering over her constantly. Cat is still in danger, I heard Poppy talking to McGonagall. If she has another vision, or if she exerts herself in anyway." He didn’t need to finish the sentence, Harry understood perfectly, it would kill her.

"Then we have to take care of her" Harry replied resolutely "she’s always taking care of me. And while we’re taking care of her, *you* can talk to her." Harry said pointedly "Unless you actually want her to marry Snape." Harry regretted his comment as he saw the painful wince on his godfather’s haunted face.

"If she does I can blame myself for that as well. Phoenix fire Harry, I’ve managed to screw up one thing after another with her." Sirius sighed "And the worst part of it is... I love her. I lover her more than I’ve ever loved anyone, before or since."

"So why don’t you tell her that Sirius?" Harry asked as he rubbed Sirius’s arm, trying to get his attention "I just know she’d want to hear you say it."

"I did Harry, right before I left to see the Roma. I told her I loved her.... I even kissed her." Sirius wiped his eyes with the back of his sleeve as he recalled the softness and warmth of Cat's lips "but it’s obviously too little too late. She’s with *him* now." He took a deep breath then continued "I don’t blame her, I take all the blame. I made her hate me."

Harry’s eyes grew wide "Hate you??? What makes you think she hates you?" he knew there had to be some sort of misunderstanding Cat didn’t hate anyone but Malfoy, Voldemort and MoM, probably in that order. "Sirius, please, talk to her.... there is nothing you could have done that was that bad."

"You're wrong Harry, I did the worst possible thing to her. I betrayed her." Sirius said as he fought off an involuntary shudder, even to this day the thought of what he did, what he lost, left him cold. "I can’t face her Harry. I’ve tried, honestly. But it’s pretty clear she doesn’t want me around, not anymore" Sirius wasn’t even bothering to wipe away the tears anymore. He simply slid down against the wall, sitting silently on the floor as he tears ran down his drawn cheeks.

"That’s not true and you know it." Harry said firmly as he sat down next to his godfather "I saw the way she looked at you during the dance, when you transformed and came to her... she was smiling, even though she was in pain. She was happy to see you, she held your hand, remember?" he insisted.

"She was probably delirious, there is no way she could forgive me." Sirius sighed "I know I never could...." he grimaced as he recalled the look of horror and pain on Cat's face as she stared at them. Both half dressed and sweaty, pumping away as if they were possessed or mad.

Harry placed his hand on Sirius’s shoulder and squeezed it gently "Then tell me. Please... If it affects you and her, it affects me." he said softly "You two are all the family I have Sirius, I love you both...... I don’t want to have to choose." Harry waited, still Sirius didn’t respond "Sirius please, how did you betray her? Was it just a prank that didn’t go the way you meant? I mean she’s here, she seems fine. You obviously didn’t do any real harm to her." Harry stopped short as he heard Sirius sob loudly as he hid his face in his hands.

"You're so wrong Harry, I hurt her terribly. I broke her heart. I never meant to, I swear Harry. If I could take it all back I would. I miss her so much. I miss knowing she loves me, it feels empty, like something inside of me is missing. I never should have stood her up... I should have abandoned Esmeralda as soon as I saw the look on Cat’s face. I still don’t know what I was thinking treating her like that"

"You stood her up" Harry said somewhat confused "you think that would make her hate you? I mean I can see her being angry, it was a lousy thing to do. But she would never hate you for that"

Sirius shook his head causing his now longish hair to fall forward and cover his face even more "There’s more.. .. It didn’t stop with me taking Esmeralda to the ball" Sirius shuddered again "I... I *did* something with her, I don’t even know why, I didn’t love her.. .. I never really cared for her... I ... I just needed to know that Kitty was the one." he said between sobs "I was so frightened by my feelings for Kitty. Harry, I never loved anyone the way I love her. It scared me, I felt like I was losing myself. I needed to prove it to myself that Kitty was the one, that it wasn’t just my imagination."

Harry stared at Sirius for a few moments before he gathered enough nerve to actually ask "You *did* something with her? You had sex with her?" he whispered "And Cat found out? She found out what you did with the other woman?" Harry waited for what seemed like hours before Sirius answered.

"Worse" Sirius whispered hoarsely "she saw. . .

Harry sat there, nearly numb as the full implication of what Sirius told him sunk in. no wonder he thinks she hates him he thought. But the more Harry thought about it, thought over everything he had seen of Cat and Sirius, he just didn’t see any hatred. Even when Cat cried at the mention of Sirius’s name, it wasn’t anger that he saw, it was sadness and pain. He needed to talk to Cat.... and Remus... he and Cat were close, he would know what to do. . .

Severus watched anxiously as Cat unwrapped his gift, he noticed the way she trembled, he was unsure if it was because of him, or simple due to her ordeal the night before. Slipping his arm around her, he placed his hands on each of hers. "Do you need help my dear?" he whispered in her ear "You seem rather shaky this evening. Maybe you should rest." he kissed her softly as he waited for her reply.

"I’m sorry" Cat answered "Its been a rough few hours. I don’t mean to seem so frail... it’s silly" she said as she hung her head, not wanting Severus to see the anxiety in her eyes.

Severus smiled lovingly as he watched Catri dip her head away from him only to have her long, thick, auburn hair fall forward, demurely hiding her face, she seemed so shy suddenly. As if she could feel his desire through her very skin. Very gently, Severus ran his fingers through her hair, tucking some of it behind her ear. "You are getting pale again Catri. Perhaps you should rest. I want you to be well for the Yule Ball." He touched her cheek softly "You are getting cold again, you need more rest. We can continue this later." he said as he gave her a gentle hug. He closed his eyes and sighed as he thought of how he would like to keep her warm, he had wanted to make love to her for so long. When she finally agreed to be his wife, he would make certain she would never find herself wanting for warmth.

"Don’t be silly Severus" Cat replied, her voice a mixture of irritation and weakness "I’m not a china doll, I’ll be fine. Besides company is the best thing for me.... I need something to keep my mind off of being stuck in the hospital...*again*" she groaned. "I swear, I’ve spent more time in here in the past two months...." she sighed, it was pointless to even say it. She smiled as she heard Sev laughing softly.

"You do have a point Miss MacLeod. It seems you and Potter have a lot in common that way." He gave her another hug as he continued "So... are you going to open it? Or shall we wait for another time, perhaps when your feeling stronger"

"I’m feeling fine Sev, honestly. Besides Harry and the others will be here soon, and you did *promise* to give them some time alone with me." Cat laughed as Sev rolled his eyes and gave a snort of disgust. "Now Sev... you promised. I know your not used to sharing, but Harry is my son, he comes first" she reminded him gently.

"So I have come to realize" Severus sighed deeply "Well then Miss MacLeod" he said as he motioned to the gift "shall we?" He watched anxiously as Catri grinned widely and finally opened his gift. He smiled when he saw her smile grow even wider, as she hesitantly reached into the box. .....