I suppose the first thing I should ask is how you are. Lily’s just told me about your life since you left us. You should have written us, you know we would have been there for you. I know you were with your family, but we should have been there too. Lily told me you almost died shortly after you left, I can’t even describe the pain I felt when she told me. Both because of it happening to you, and because I was never even told.
I know Sirius is my best friend and that you and he didn’t part on very good terms, but I’m still your sister’s husband, your ‘brother James’. And I love you as much as I do my own sister, maybe even more as I don’t have all those sibling rivalry issues with you and you never stole my journal like she did. But all joking aside, I don’t EVER want you to go through anything like that without us at your side. This is one of two promises I want you to give to me, Kitty.
The other promise is to find a way to get through that ridiculous barricade the MoM put up and help your sister. Lily doesn’t know it yet, and I’m doing my best to keep it from her, but Voldemort is actively searching out old blood families and killing any of them that won’t obey him. Needless to say, my family has always been outspoken in defying him and his lackeys, and as such he has taken a keen interest in killing us off.
My sister has taken her family into hiding, I’m not sure where (for obvious reasons), but I’ll have to do the same with Lily and Harry soon. I’ve been putting it off for as long as possible but I just can’t wait much longer, especially as I have the distinct feeling your sister may carrying another little Potter. (wink, wink, nudge, nudge)
In either case, she will need you by her side, she misses you more and more each day. In fact, if such a thing is possible, she may even miss you more than Sirius does. And speaking of my dear friend Sirius Black, I need to yell at you and then explain a few things to you.
First the yelling. WHY didn’t you TELL me about the photos Esmeralda showed you?!!!! You must have realized they couldn’t be real. I know he hurt you, Kitty, believe me I know, I was there, I saw the look on your face and I swear I actually heard your heart breaking. I don’t know what he was thinking, and as often as I’ve asked him he’s never been able to give me any sort of answer. If I didn’t know any better, I would swear someone either hexed him or gave him a potion to make him do it. I know that sounds like a cheap excuse, but I swear to you Kitty, I have NEVER seen him truly happy since that night. Its like all the joy and happiness in his life left with you.
And speaking of joy and happiness, when are you going to give the idiot a chance to make it all up to you? I’m fairly confident you’re still single (cause if you’re not, you’ll be widowed when Lily finds out - yes, her temper is STILL that bad) and I can assure you HE is still single. In fact, our dear Sirius is quite the recluse anymore, he barely even dates, he just keeps going on and on and on and on and on (you get the idea) about you. And let me tell you Kitty, if I have to hear him telling me about the Quidditch team you two were planning to have, I may kill him before the death eaters do. (By the way, did you have a NAME for this Quidditch brood you‘re planning on pushing out? Just curious)
I know you may not believe this, Kitty, but take it from you ‘other’ brother. Sirius STILL loves you, he always has and I swear to you he always will. He even asked me for my permission to propose to you if you showed up at our wedding. I told him yes, provided it was done either before Lily came in, or after we left as husband and wife, (I also told him if he got to you before, Lily wouldn’t mind a double wedding, after all, that was the original plan - wasn’t it?). It broke his heart almost as much as it did Lily’s that you couldn’t make it through. Every time someone came into the reception he head would practically spin like an owls to see if it was you.
And yesterday, as he tagged along with us in Diagon Alley, he overheard Lily and I teasing each other about jewellery, I said women always go for the big ones, but she insisted that’s not true and proceeded to point out a golden band with delicate etching that she said, and I quote. “Kitty would love that, she would think those gems were just too gaudy.” I barely saw the blur as Sirius dashed by us and bought the ring. When I asked him why, he told me he was going to use it as a promise ring for you. I think he intends to owl it to you, to prove he’s earnest. As it is he’s taken to wearing it on a chain, just like you used to wear his.
And speaking of rings and promises, this is the second one that I want you to make to me. Promise me that if anything happens to me, you will find/ create/ blow a hole through that barrier and find Lily and Harry. The thought of them being alone and at the mercy of Voldemort or his death eaters scares the living daylights out of me. I want you to promise me that you will take them back to Fernglennis with you and keep them safe. And on the off chance that Sirius doesn’t manage to die at my side, take him with you too. He’s Harry’s godfather, he’ll need to be there to teach him all the things I won’t be able to. (And I’d hate to rob the world of a MacLeod-Black Quidditch team)
With any luck we’ll be able to discuss all of this in person soon. And if fate smiles on us, you can save this letter so the four of us can sit around the fire with some butter beer in a dozen years or so and laugh at my paranoia as our children are away at Hogwarts making the professors reconsider their choice of careers.
Kitty, post Lily or I back as soon as you get this letter. Even if you don’t have the courage or the inclination to read Sirius’s letters, please, please, for Lily and Harry’s sake, let me know that you’ve read this and that I can count on you to be there to protect them if I’m gone.
Love,
Your brother James