Turning the picture over, Cat immediately recognized James’s handwriting. ‘See what you’re missing? Come back to us soon, he STILL loves you Kitty, and so do we’
The next thing Cat felt was Lia’s strong hands gently guiding her to a chair. “Come on luvy, have a cuppa and take a few deep breathes.” she suggested as she placed a cup of tea in Cat’s hands. She stroked Cat’s hair as she waited for her to calm down “What’s wrong? Don’t tell me that’s a picture of our Sirius with his own child, he wouldn’t have lied to us like that, I know he wouldn’t.”
“No, its Harry. I’m crying because of how much we’ve lost. We wanted to have a large family, did you know that? A regular Quidditch team….but things just didn’t work out the way we had planned.” Cat sniffled as her tears fell silently down her cheeks. “And now I find out that Severus hasn’t turned his back on me…..someone’s been preventing his letters from reaching me, and replacing my letter to him with heartless forgeries. Oh, Lia, what am I going to do? My feelings for both of them are very deep….”
“But….” Lia prompted.
“But I still love Sirius every bit as much as I did back then, if it weren’t for him betraying me then, I have no doubt we would have been married as soon as we graduated.” Cat sighed “But Severus has ALWAYS been there for me, he had never betrayed me, never an unkind word…..I know how he treats others, and that does bother me, but I see him trying to change. I’ve seen him making real attempts to accept Cash and the other Gangrels, even though he’s terrified of them, he does this to make me happy……I can’t just turn my back on him.”
“And can you just turn your back on Sirius?” Amber asked, “Doesn’t he mean just as much to you as this Severus?”
Cat nodded, “That’s the problem, I can’t decide between them” she laughed sadly. “They are both so different yet both so much alike…..what am I going to do?”
Lia kissed Cat on her forehead, “You are going to go through the rest of this box, maybe you’ll find something in here to help you, and if you don’t we’ll just keep talking about it until we’re all either sick to death of it, or we find an answer.” Then smirking playfully she added, “Or, if you prefer, we can simply toss you into a room with both of them and see which one…’pleases’…. you the most.”
“Don’t tempt me, Lia, please. Its all I can do to keep Sirius at arms length right now.”
“Wait!!!!. . … No, cousin, NO!!!” Amber gasped, “You don’t actually expect me to believe that after all this time. . He talks of nothing but you and your son, he wants to have a family with you. And I see the way he looks at you, his eyes flashing between tenderness and longing, and heaven forbid if you’re near enough to touch. If he’s not holding your hand he’s touching your hair or kissing you or ….. I mean…” She put her hands on her hips and blurted out. “Do you expect me to believe that after all the nights you two have shared a bed, your bed, that neither of you have…..well, you know
“Exactly what I mean, Amber.” Cat replied, only to drop her shoulders as she continued, “But its so hard for me to be good. I miss him so much, its all I can do to stop myself when we start kissing or playing around.” she smiled softly as her eyes took on a far away look, “I love it when he‘s playful, he looks young and happy again, he reminds me of this picture, of the Sirius ‘I‘ remember; my Sirius.”
“I don’t know whether to give you my respect or condolences,” Amber commented. “I mean, come on Kitty, look at him, even thin and haggard as he is he’s still not a bad looking man. And he strikes me as being extremely passionate, not to mention…… OW!!!”
“Let your cousin be” Lia chastised as she pinched Amber smartly, “she has her reasons for what she’s doing, she doesn’t need you to add to her burden. Now, Kitty, the box, before my little girl sticks her other foot in it.”
Cat laughed softly as she nodded. “Right, like you said, there might be something in here to help me decide, right?” she said sarcastically as she reached into the box once more. “Ewwwww, this isn’t going to help,” she grimaced as she lifted out a package of chocolate frogs, “they don’t even jump anymore, oh …..gross, that‘s just nasty.” she whined as one of them crumbled in her hands.
“That’s it, I’m sticking with letters and photos, anymore bags or small boxes go into the sink first.” she stated adamantly as she picked up the tea towel and cleaned her hands.
“There are quite a few letters in here, Kitty. Oh, look at the colours on this one” Lia commented as she picked up one that was covered in roses and lilacs, still blooming and fragrant after all the years that had passed.
“That one has to be from Lily” she grinned, “actually, most of them are probably from Lily. We wrote each other on a fairly regular basis.” Cat finally smiled as she sat back down, a small stack of letters in front of her. Well at least these were letters that she was glad to read, at least she was until she began to read the second one. It was from Lily, but it wasn’t her normal sort of letter, it was a warning that Voldemort was now looking for her and James, and that their time on this Earth was soon coming to an end. Lily was having the nightmare almost nightly now, and it was always the same, she still hadn’t told James about it, insisting it would kill him to know he was powerless to stop them from being murdered. But it was the last paragraph of the letter that had nearly stopped Cat’s heart….. It was a plea from Lily, reminding her of her promise to take care of Harry once she was gone, and also asking her to forgive Sirius. Lily had written that things weren’t at all what they had thought, Esmeralda had lied to them all, she wanted Cat gone at all costs. She went on to tell her how Sirius had never been the same since she had left, that he asks her constantly if she has heard anything at all from ‘his Cat’ or her family. It also begged her to read the letters that James and Sirius had sent along with hers, and asking her, that if she could find it in her heart to forgive Sirius, to please raise Harry with his godfather, to give Harry the family he should have.
Cat froze as the words sunk in, Esmeralda had lied to them all…..but what she had seen was no lie, she had walked in on them, she had seen it, smelt it, heard it…. She tore through the remainder of the letters until she found the ones Lily had mentioned. One from James and another from Sirius. Her hands were shaking as she opened the letters….
Lily had just finished tying the parchment and the small parcel of photos to the owl’s leg as James came home. He would have thought nothing of it, if it hadn’t have been for the flash of metal as the bird flew away. She was sending letters to Kitty again, or more to the point, doing so in secret. “You know, the least you could do is ask her to forgive him. Isn’t two years of suffering enough?” he snapped as he flopped down onto the couch, rubbing a slightly singed hand over the gash on his cheek.
“What makes you think I was mailing Kitty?” Lily asked, her hands on her hips. “You know I do have other friends.” she added as she went to the kitchen, grabbing the first aide basket that stood constantly ready since James had become an auror. “Let me see your cheek first,……James! Its still bleeding, what happened now?”
“Another attack, a muggle school this time, and don’t change the subject.” he winced as she rubbed the healing ointment into the cut. “And as for knowing that letter was for Kitty? How many other owls need medallions to find their destinations.” he sighed as she moved to his hand. “Lily, why won’t you help him? Do you get some sort of enjoyment from watching his pain? For the love of Circe, Lil, he’s our son’s godfather don’t you want him to be happy?”
“If he wants to be happy then tell him to get on with it and marry Esmeralda Filch like he was supposed to. I’m sure they will be very happy together, and I’m equally as sure ’his’ family will be pleased, her being pure blood and all. They obviously didn’t care for Kitty anymore than he did.” she retorted as she waved her wand in small circles, bandaging her husbands wounded hand.
“What the hell are you talking about?” James shouted, “Since when has Sirius talked about marrying anyone other than Kitty?” he knew he shouldn’t have raised his voice at her, especially with Harry sleeping in the next room, but he just couldn’t stop himself. It had been another bad day, more muggles dead, more children dead, and Sirius had been taking too many chances again, he nearly got hit with an avada curse this afternoon, it came close enough to singe about two inches off of his hair. And at the moment, despite Sirius’s many faults, anyone who spoke against him was going to hear it from James in a major sort of way.
“Don’t you dare defend him to me.” Lily hissed, looking over her shoulder to make sure the baby was still napping. “I saw the same pictures Kitty did. Hell, Esmeralda made it a point to show them to everyone she could, telling them it was their ‘wedding’ pictures.” she hastily grabbed the basket as she stalked out of the room, only to return with a bag of ice for the quickly appearing bruise on James’s neck. “I knew they were too young, but I know an engagement party when I see one. I guess his ’love’ for my sister wasn’t strong enough to stand up to his own family, huh?” she spat as she moved to walk off again, only to be caught by James.
“Whoa, Lily, slow down. What are you talking about? What engagement party? And what does his family have to do with this?” He asked, his eyes softening dramatically as he saw the barely contained tears in his wife’s eyes. Either she was more upset than she was willing to admit, or she was pregnant again. Seeing she wasn’t about to volunteer any information, James stood up, wincing with pain as he wrapped his arms around her. “Come now, what can be so bad that you can’t tell your husband?” he asked as he kissed her softly. “And what would make you think he would marry Filch of all people?” he smirked, only to regret ever opening his mouth a second later.
“You mean besides him betraying Kitty with her? Planning it so my sister would walk in on them, using ‘you‘ to lead her to them? Isn‘t that enough..“ Lily narrowed her eyes, keenly feeling the pain and loneliness Kitty’s absence had left in her life. Gods, how she needed to talk to her, now especially, the nightmares had returned to her full force. It could only be a matter of weeks until she and James were dead and she knew it. “Do you really want to know James? Do you want to see the pictures? Do you want to know what that skanky little whore said to Kitty?”
James took a step back, nodding as a vague fear knotted in his stomach. He couldn’t remember her being this angry, not since their wedding, but something obviously must have happened to bring all this old pain back to the front. Perhaps she had seen Filch today, or maybe someone had asked her about Kitty. Whatever the reason, she needed to get it out, it couldn’t be good for her.
“She cornered Kitty and I in the lavatory, told her that no decent family would allow Kitty to marry any of their sons, certainly not a pure blooded family like the Blacks.” Lily explained, wiping away angry tears as she continued. “She went on to tell her how Sirius laughed at how inexperienced she was, that she didn‘t know what to do or how to do it, he had to teach her everything. He intended to take her again, up the bum this time, but Esmeralda felt he had had enough ‘fun‘ at her expense and felt that as a woman she had to put a stop to it.”
James stood there mutely, shaking his head, this couldn’t be, it just couldn’t be. Sirius loved Kitty, and as for her being inexperience….yes, Sirius had mentioned that, but never with anything other than a sense of awe and on occasion, concern. And to hear the way his friend talked, he had absolutely ‘no’ problem with teaching Kitty the ropes. In fact his smile had been so wide at times that he, Remus and Peter had threatened to smack if off his face if he didn’t stop gloating over her ‘playfulness and sense of adventure’ as he referred to it. “He wouldn’t, Lil….he would never..”
“NO?! That’s what I thought; I tried to tell Kitty he wasn’t married to her, that he would never stand by a piece of trash like that. But she couldn’t stop crying long enough for me to get it through her head.” Lily sniffled. “And then, the following weeks? The way he treated her, as if it was all ’her’ fault, and still, she kept sobbing over him; saying how she wished Angus was still alive that he would never have allowed this to happen, that Rebekah wasn’t strong enough to stop Angus’s family.” Seeing the look of confusion on James’s face, she added. “You ‘do’ remember how Sirius’s Aunt treated her, called her a gold digger, slut and several other things. Do you think she forgot about that? Do you think it didn‘t hurt her? She loved him, James, she loved him with her entire heart and soul, she wanted his family to like her, or at least accept her.”
She clenched her hands as tears rolled down her face. “Because of them, James, I’m alone….I’ve lost my sister, she’s been banished and doesn’t even have the heart to try coming back, because I know she has the power. I wanted her to be my maid of honour, I wanted her to share in my happiness, I want her to be happy. And as for our Harry? Kitty is his godmother, I don’t care if she can be here or not, she’s the only one I will ever trust to raise my son.”
James wiped away the tears from his face and hers, hushing her as he gently set her down. Taking a deep breath he asked, “Lily, darling, why didn’t you say something about this before? You should have told me all about this, holding it inside is going to kill you.” he sighed as he kissed her forehead. “First of all, Sirius isn’t engaged, he isn’t married, nothing, nothing at all.”
“Then why did he do it? Why did he cheat on her? Why did he hurt her time and time again? And how can you be so sure he‘s not engaged, James? He‘s kept secrets from you in the past.” she reminded him.
“I know he has, Lil, but you didn’t see the way he kept jumping up every time someone came to our wedding. If you think you were anxious for her to come, let me tell you right now, it was ’nothing’ compared to him. Every time the door opened, he would be right there, expecting, hoping it would be her. He still loves her Lily, he had the ring his father left him in his pocket the entire time. He swore to me if Kitty showed up, she wasn‘t getting out again until he had convinced her to marry him, and he wasn‘t joking, Lil, I saw the ring myself.”
“As for the rest?” James shook his head sadly, “I don’t know why he screwed the Filch girl, and to be honest, I don’t think HE knows why he did that. And afterwards” he shrugged “I’m putting most of that down to a guilty conscious and pride. But what I do know is he is going to get himself killed if she doesn’t come back to him soon.”
“What are you talking about James?”
“Do you see the assignments he takes?” he asked, his voice soft and his eyes haunted. “He’s been going into camps of death eaters with little to no back up, taking on ridiculous odds, he has a death wish, Lil. Without Kitty, ….. He’s not the same guy he used to be, you know that as well as I do. But he is still my best friend, and I don’t want to lose him, and I sure as hell don’t want to bury him. Lil, I don’t know what really happened back then, I doubt any of us do, even Cat and Sirius themselves. But please, please, if you care about Sirius, even a little, tell him where she is, let him at least talk to her, apologize in person.”
Lily shook her head, “I don’t know where she is..”
James sighed in exasperation, “Lily, I just saw you sending her an owl, you can’t tell me you don’t know where she is. I know you two are closer than most sisters, but you’ve got to be fair, merciful…”
“NO, James, … I don’t know where she is, I just send the letters to her home and her mother sends them on to her. Last I heard, she was travelling a lot, supposedly to help her father attend to clan business, but Deirdre thinks its to try and outrun her pain.” She explained, “Deirdre and I post back and forth constantly.” she reached behind James, picking up her knitting basket. Moving a nearly completed baby blanket, she pulled out a thick stack of letters, handing them to her husband. “Kitty hasn’t been the same either, and she nearly died the beginning of our seventh year.”
“That would be about the same time you and Severus nearly killed Sirius on the Quidditch field.” he stated, “I always wondered what had caused you to go off the rod like that…..Lily, why didn’t you tell me?”
“It wouldn’t have done any good,” she said sadly, “you couldn’t have brought her back. And every time I saw him I kept thinking that if he wouldn’t have betrayed her, or if he had only apologized to her instead of screaming at her, saying those awful things…..she would have been there with us James. She would have been safe…” Lily shuddered with relief as James wrapped her in his arms, forcing her head onto his chest. “I was afraid if I….I didn’t want to lose you, but just seeing him made me angry. And then to watch him flirting with those girls like that… Diedre never told me what happened, but I think she tried to hurt herself.”
James nodded as he sniffled softly, he understood, he sees Sirius try to do the same thing nearly everyday. “Ok Lil, this is what you have to do. Write her another letter, tell her everything I’ve just told you. Tell her to contact Sirius, or at least let him contact her…..while you’re doing that, I’m going to floo over to his place, tell him to write her a letter, I won’t promise him anything, but I’ll tell him I MAY have a way to get it to her, alright?”
Lily nodded, “Alright.”…..
“Sirius? Hey, Sirius, buddy, you home?” James called out as he stepped out of the fireplace.
“Not if you’ve come to yell at me again.” Sirius sighed, “I’m a big boy, James, I don’t need you watching over me like a mother hen.” he stated as he walked out of the bathroom, towelling off his hair.
“Hmmm, you seem to have taken to those blue jeans…don’t tell me you’re going to start dressing like a muggle now?” James smirked, relieved to see Sirius’s infamous lop-sided grin.
“Want a beer?” Sirius asked as he opened the fridge, “Fraid I don’t have much in the way of decent food, unless cold cuts count?” he laughed as he laid a plate of lunch meat on the table with two bottles. “So, what tears you away from the lovely Lily and that little boy of yours to darken my doorstep?”
James tried hard not to smile and give himself away, but he was practically bursting at the seams to tell Sirius the news. “Nothing much, just wanted to make sure you managed to survive today….nice haircut by the way, you might want a professional to take a look at that.” he teased, tipping the bottle in his friends direction as Sirius scowled at him.
“Tosser.” he responded, sticking out his tongue as James laughed at him. “So, what ’are’ you up to tonight? Going to see Peter, or just trying to avoid Lily?” his face darkened and his voice became deadly serious as he continued, “She hasn’t heard has she? She has enough on her mind with the baby, she doesn’t need to worry about Voldemort too.”
“No. I’ve managed to keep that information from her, for now. But she’s a smart woman, Sirius, it won’t take her long to figure it out. Especially once I bring up the subject of moving to her. Merlin, she’s going to lose her mind ’til this is over, hell, I’m halfway there already.”
“You know my door is always open to you. The apartment’s a bit small, granted, but my mother would love to have Lily and Harry stay with her. It may help her, she hasn’t been the same since Da died. And me screwing things up with Cat hasn’t helped…” he smiled half-heartedly, “I think she was planning to put all her time and effort into raising the grandchildren, ya know?” he tilted the bottle back, taking a long drink as he tried not to think of Cat and what he had thrown away.
“Speaking of which,” James said coolly, waiting until Sirius had set down the bottle and started staring at him.
“Speaking of grandchildren?? James, you dog, is Lily preggers again?” he smirked.
“Not that I’m aware of, although I have my suspicions,” James admitted, “she’s been awfully moody lately. But this has to do with Rebekah’s grandchildren…..” he stated, tipping his bottle back, making sure to take an exceptionally long time, just to give Sirius the opportunity to get worried.
“Rebekah? MY mother, Rebekah? James, buddy, I think you may have taken one to many shots to the head. I’m her only child, and we all know the chances of me having any children….don’t we.” he said flatly, his eyes shimmering as the mistakes of his past mocked him.
“Oh, great,… I go to all this trouble to hook you up and you don’t even seem interested.” James grinned.
“James….” Sirius sighed, “listen, I appreciate it, really I do. But we both know what my last few ‘dates’ have been like. I feel worse after going out than I do sitting here alone. At least here I can pretend she’ll come back….one day…maybe…”
“So, you’re telling me that no matter who I find, you just aren’t interested?” James baited.
“Unless you’ve managed to find Cat and convince her to give me another chance, then no.” Sirius commented, only to stare intently as James as his friend smirked, tilting back his bottle, only to have Sirius rip it out of his hands. “JAMES???!!!”
James smiled widely, laughing as Sirius leapt across the small table and hugged him until he was sure he heard a rib or two cracking. “Down boy… come on, Padfoot, I’ve got to go back to Lily in at least ‘some’ sort of shape.”
“James, I swear, I could kiss you right now.” Sirius grinned, it had been years since he felt so happy. Cat, his Cat…
“Whoa, no kissing.” James smirked, “And before you go crazy, I can’t promise you anything. I haven’t spoken with her personally, but Lily’s got a few letters from her and her mother. I’m hoping if we have you write a letter or two to her….”
“Do you really think that will make a difference? Especially after all this time….she’s probably with someone else now….she might even be married.” Sirius sighed, the depression showing on him once more.
“Her?? Married? Without Lily knowing?” James grinned as he wrapped a brotherly arm around his best friend. “It will be a righteously short marriage if Kitty dared to get married without Lily’s approving the guy first.” he winked. Seeing little change in Sirius’s mood, James became serious. “Hey, think about it Sirius. She loved you, more than likely still does. And before you ask me how I know, look at Lily. She and Kitty are practically twins, and if Lily still manages to hate you for what you did, then I can all but promise you that Kitty still loves you. Those tears of hers were no act…”
“I thought Lily got over than when you two asked me to be Harry’s godfather? She seems fine whenever I come to visit.” Sirius replied, not particularly bolstered by James’s reasoning.
“She is…for the most part, but lets face it, she holds a grudge. I’m just glad she was on our team. I’d be scared to have to go against her, ya know.”
“Yeah, I know, I know. I’m the one she nearly decapitated, remember?” Sirius smirked, “Not that I didn’t deserve it…”
After several minutes of silence as the two men sat contemplating their own thoughts, Sirius suddenly spoke up. “Do you ‘honestly’ think I have a chance to win her back? Do you even think she’ll read my letter, I certainly wouldn’t blame her if she didn’t.”
“Your letter, my letter, Lily’s letter…lots of pictures of the baby…lots of pictures of YOU with the baby….yeah, I’d say she’d read it.” James replied confidently. “After all, weren’t you two always planning to have a big family? And I remember her taking care of those nieces and nephews of hers, more to the point, I remember ‘you and her’ taking care of them. Scary that was, you both acting like parents…”
“Those were wonderful times.” Sirius sighed, “I always wanted a big family, I hate being an only child.”
“What was the question again?” James smirked as Sirius grinned at him.
“Let me find my quill, and parchment, lots and lots of parchment…” Sirius paused mid step, “How much do you think the owl can carry?”……
James stepped into the living room, smiling as he saw Lily feeding Harry. “Hello gorgeous, feeling any better?” he grinned as he bent down to kiss her.
“Much. How was Sirius? Happy to hear the news?” she asked sarcastically.
James grinned as he pulled out a stack of letters, “This answer your question? I was beginning to think I’d be there until midnight” he laughed, “I can’t even tell you how many he wrote.”
“He wants to send them all now?? Merlin’s beard, James, the poor owl..”
“No, I convinced him that it would be best to send a few every so many days. But Lily, I need you to do two things for me.” he smiled warmly as Lily nodded, “I need you to write her a very detailed, very kind letter, asking her….hell, begging her if you need to…”
“To read Sirius’s letters no matter how much it hurts her?” she smirked, lifting up a piece of parchment, “Already done.”
“That’s my girl” James gushed as he kissed her again. “Okay, just one more thing. You know they were always talking about having a family and kids and all. Do we have any pictures of Sirius with…..” he paused as he saw her pointing toward the living room.
“End table, a whole stack of them, I was just looking through them when Harry woke up and wanted something to eat. Didn’t you my big boy.” she cooed, tickling him under his chin as he smiled up at her. “As much as it galls me, he would make a good father….but only to Kitty’s children!’ she added emphatically.
“Lily, darling, I have no doubt he would agree with you one hundred percent.”…..
Siri‘s letter
Aeranna knitted her brow as she gazed into the silver bowl full of water from the sacred spring and a few drops of her own blood. Things did not look good for her ‘sister’, the rion, Catrianna MacLeod, forces were moving against her, hoping to strike at her heart. She turned her head from the gazing bowl, staring at the rows of candles that lit her haven. How many years had it been since she had seen Cat? The rion had studied under her at one time, joining her and a few others in the ‘sisterhood’, she had been initiated into the dark mysteries of nature. The ways of the wild, the beauties of the savage garden they called life. They had euphemistically been dubbed, “the sisterhood of the rose”, it was such a gentle and serene name, and completely alien to the true nature of the sisterhood.
They were warrior mages, magical fighters, they knew how to use all manners of magic and several fighting disciplines. They had been taught to protect and defend, they had been chosen both for their talents and for their looks. Seemingly soft and defenceless, she and her ‘sisters’ were amongst the most deadly of creatures; living, dead or otherwise.
Perhaps it was time to call the sisterhood together once more, Magnus had disbanded it when he realized his daughter had been inducted without either his knowledge or consent, but then the men were never consulted on these things. This was a cult that was as old as any of the MacLeod crones, and once a member, always a member, no matter what her father may have said or done, Aeranna knew that Catrianna still bore the mark of the sisterhood. Just as she knew that nothing Magnus did would ever truly disband, let alone destroy the sisterhood.
Dipping her fingers into the bowl, Aeranna stirred the water gently, thinking of her mortal sister, Coco, who now resided within the wizard’s school as a member of the Caitiff clan. She could easily contact her, between the two of them they could assure the safety of the Rion and the continuation of the Sidhe bloodline. After all, if anything were to happen to Cat, if her life were to end before she bore a daughter, so would the magic of the Sidhe. Every spell ever cast by one of her ilk would being to falter and eventually fail. Including the spells that held their worlds within the folds of the veil, she shook her head as she tried to imagine all the different worlds falling out of their respective dimensions, crashing to the same piece of Earth.
Millions of lives would be lost, the world as they knew it would be destroyed, hell, the Earth itself would fall apart with the sheer weight of everyone and everything. She shook her head as she pictured Edinburgh, Fernglennis, Hogwarts and Camelot all occupying the same space and time, and that was mild compared to what would happen in places like New York City, Tel Aviv, and Moscow…….
Hermione laid in her bed, staring at the ceiling as she wondered how Harry was doing, it wasn’t like him not to owl her at least once over the holidays. Although Ron had written that he and Miss MacLeod had visited them at the burrow. But still, there were so many things that seemed odd about the woman. From the whole Sidhe thing to her knowledge of ‘dark’ magic, even down to the spider silk dress in her wardrobe. If only Herm could remember what sect of magic had their priestesses wear them….
She couldn’t explain why, but a little voice inside of her told her that it was important. Even more so, now that Ron had mentioned that some of his brothers were rather taken with Miss MacLeod’s nieces and cousins. She remembered back to the talk she and MacLeod had the night of the Yule Ball, it was obvious how much she loved Harry, but still, she went off with Snape, even though he had asked her not to. Something just didn’t seem right about the whole thing, there must be something she was overlooking, and she had a feeling it was all tied to that dress……
“So, Cash, what do YOU think about all of this? Do you think Orpha has a point?” Merlin asked “She, Luke and I were discussing her behaviour, and then this was brought up.”
Cash nodded, “Yes, I’m sure that’s why she did it. I remember her words exactly at the Yule Ball. I was teasing her about asking Remus or Albus, she told me to stop feeding off of drunks.” he smirked, laughing silently as he remembered the rest of her words. “Ask Albus? Alright Cash, stop feeding off drunks.” she teased, then becoming very serious she added “and don’t step over the line Cash. I love you dearly, I would kill or die for you, but I will not end up like Wanda. I will not be forced into a marriage just to have children. I know you don’t like Severus and will never allow me to marry him. That’s fine, and I can accept that. But if I become pregnant you and I both know no one will force me into anything, they would never risk my losing the baby.” Angel paused as she felt Cash’s body tense. “He is strong, intelligent, and powerful, Cash, I believe those are the only prerequisites our clan cares about where fathering children are concerned.”
“So, I take it she planned this all then, just to avoid..” Merlin began, only to be interrupted by Cash.
“JUST to avoid!… No! To circumvent fate, to stop her future from ending up like Wanda’s. The clan wants heirs, she will provide them with heirs, pure and simple. I know the way she thinks Merlin, I’ve watched over her since the day she was born. She chose Snape because of his strengths, he is powerful, intelligent and his magic is very, very strong. She also chose him because she know the clan will not accept him, but more to the point, he will not accept the clan. Can you picture him sitting down to tea with Bruid or Rolali, or perhaps Puneet?”
“Is he ’that’ hopeless, Cash?” Merlin frowned, “I would think he must posses some redeemable character if our little girl was so enamoured by him. You do realize she still holds a place in her heart for him, don’t you?”
“Of course, despite what she may say, you and I both know she would never have gone with him if she didn’t love him. I just wish she would have known the whole truth about Sirius before she left. It would have changed everything, I’m sure of it.”
“Perhaps, but what is done, is done.” Merlin sighed. “The question is, what are we to do now? I want to meet this Professor Snape, as does Orpha, Luke and Paddy.”
“What?! No Duncan?” Cash smirked
“He may well be the father of Kitty’s child, I’d like to keep him alive for a little while, at least long enough to see his own…..”
“She’s pregnant?!” Cash gasped, “Are you sure?”
“No, I’m not, not at all. But Sirius seems to be and he is fitting in so wonderfully with the clan” Merlin stated, smiling widely as he pictured his descendant with various members of the clan. “Orpha adores him, Paddy is almost willing to give Edana up to he and Kitty, although he is still hoping that won’t be necessary. And I must tell you, Sirius is positively in love with that little girl, Paddy has to fight to get her back at times, and he seems very willing to take in little Callista as well, we’re still waiting to see how Calli feels about this though.”
Cash shook his head, “He must be in his glory, not home two weeks and already a daddy of three. What does Harry think about all of this? He isn’t getting too jealous, is he? And what makes our Siri think Kitty is with child…..you do know that he knows about Snape, right?”
“I know he knows, but Kitty does NOT know that he knows. I’m hoping she decides to buck up and tell him the truth soon, especially as they seem to be growing closer by the day. As for what makes him believe she’s with child?” Merlin shrugged his shoulders, “She’s not eating right, getting queasy half way through a meal, always tired, pale….what else did he say?”
“Never mind, that’s enough” Cash sighed, “what about Harry?”
Merlin smiled broadly, rocking backwards and laughing deeply. “Our dear Harry is having the time of his life. He seems to enjoy the role of big brother immensely. When I left, he, Calli and Sirius were taking turns holding Edana, and let me tell you, that little bundle of joy is enjoying all the extra attention. She’s put on nearly four pounds in a little over a week, she looks so much healthier now that Kitty’s back.”
Cash snorted playfully, “What’s wrong, Siobhan isn’t good enough for her?”
“Siobhan has done a wonderful job with her, but she’s already a mother several times over, and that Sara is a handful. Kitty doesn’t have anyone but Harry to worry about, and she dotes on that baby as if she were her own. And now Sirius is just as bad, between them she’s absolutely spoiled.”
“Good” Cash grinned, “that’s what I like to hear. Babies being loved, getting all nice and chubby…. I just love it when their knees dimple” he added, smiling happily as he pictured what Edana must look like now. “So, what are we going to do about Kitty and Snape? Any ideas?”…..
“What is THAT on your neck?!” Sirius gasped as he pointed at Remus. “Moony, don’t tell me …..it can’t be, can it?”
“Shut up, Padfoot.” Remus grumbled as his cheeks flared bright pink.
“But, …but…” Sirius gasped in between laughs. “Can I guess who gave you that? Not exactly subtle of her, now is it.”
Sirius laughed even harder as Remus growled softly at him, seeing the look of confusion on Harry and Calli’s faces, he shook his head and handed Edana to Harry. Sliding next to Remus, Sirius jabbed him as he continued. “So, marking her territory is she? I knew I liked her, now if only she could get Cat to be so…uhm…. Aggressive, shall we say.”
“WE shall say nothing, Padfoot. Nothing at all, do you understand me?”
“Come on , Moony. You don’t actually expect me to quiet about this, now do you? I mean, ‘I’ have had to behave myself for weeks now….WEEKS. And you, you’re not even with her, what, one week. And you come home sporting one of those” Sirius shook his finger at a beet red Remus “shame, shame Remus, what would mother say?”
“Before or after she found you bound and gagged?” Remus asked as he stood up and walked towards Harry. “Give me the baby, Harry, hopefully your godfather will behave himself in front of her.”
“Nice try, Moony, but she’s too young to understand, so you’re not getting off that easy…..or maybe that isn’t the best phrase to use, under the circumstances.” Sirius paused as Remus turned and glared at him, only to burst into laughter when Sirius started wiggling his eyebrows at him. “You devil, you did, didn’t you?”
“NO…no, we didn’t, nothing like that.” Remus insisted quickly, “We were just talking, and one thing lead to another and well, then….”
“Just talking, huh?” Sirius grinned knowingly. “Must be something about the MacLeod women and conversation….”
“Must be” Remus deadpanned, “especially as she came to specifically discuss you and Kitty.” Remus felt a surge of satisfaction as his friend stopped dead in his tracks.
“About Cat and …….what did she say? Will they let me marry her?”
“You mean she said yes!!!” Harry’s voice chirped up. “Finally!! Calli did you hear that? I’ve got parents again.”
Remus and Sirius looked completely aghast as they realized Harry had been listening, and had taken their conversation in the wrong way. “No, Harry….hey kiddo, wait. It’s not like that at all.” Remus tried to explain, only to be taken further aback by Sirius’s actions.
Watching with amazement, Remus observed as Sirius’s face first went red with shock and embarrassment, only to cringe with pain. Instead of yelling out as Remus had, or becoming sullen as he normally did, Sirius walked up to Harry and placed his hand on his shoulder. “Harry, stop. She didn’t say yes, she can’t say yes. I know you’ve been told this before, but you have to listen this time. It truly is not her decision, its her clans, her father’s and the crones. She hasn’t said no, so that’s a good sign. You love me and I love you, and the others.” he added, motioning to Calli and Edana. “I want to be a family every bit as much as you do, but Cat’s been through an awful lot over the past few weeks, and even more over the past forty eight hours. I don’t want you act like that in front of her, alright? She’s going through a very tough time, she has a lot on her mind….”
“You mean about being a mother to more than just me?” Harry asked quietly.
Sirius nodded, “That’s part of it, Harry. That’s one of the reasons she was so happy to see you with the girls today. Your opinions and happiness mean a lot to her, she won’t say yes if she thinks it will hurt you. Remember that when Snape is brought up, okay? Let her know if you don’t like it, but please, Harry, for her sake and for mine, don’t get angry or nasty about it. The same goes for me, let them know that you want her to marry me, it might just be what makes the difference in their decision, but don’t carry on like that in front of her.”
“What happened?” Harry asked, his voice full of worry and dread, “I saw she looked tired and maybe a little sad, but she’s kind of looked that way a lot lately. I didn’t know anything had happened…”
“Hush” Sirius cooed as he gave Harry a fatherly hug. “Just some bad news from the school. Roel’s injuries were far worse than she had been lead to believe, and then someone brought a stack of letters to her….they were from Snape. This whole thing is tearing her heart out. We have BOTH got to be patient with her, understand?”
Harry nodded “Sirius, you haven’t given up, have you? I mean, you still want to ….you still want to be a family, right?”
Sirius gave Harry the biggest grin he could manage. “Of course I do. I love you and I love her, more than anything else in the world, I love the two of you. But I’m not going to put her on the spot, especially not in front of her family. Listen very closely to me, Harry. Luke and I have been talking a lot lately, and I think he’s right about what I should do. You might notice that I’m going to be acting a little differently towards Cat, I’ve been trying to act ‘respectable’ in front of her family, maybe holding hands and a hug here and there. Well, Luke seems to think that if I act like I’m her husband, they’ll just come to see me that way. So, that means more long walks, more kisses, more….uhm….”
“Liberties?” Remus suggested.
“Good word. Liberties. I don’t want you to think this means she or the clan have said yes. I don’t want you to get your hopes up too much.” Sirius continued. “But the more of the clan I can get on our side, the more of them who simply ‘see’ me as her husband.”
“But they HAVE to pick you. I mean between you and Snape, how can they not pick you?” Harry insisted.
“But its not just between Sirius and Severus” Remus corrected him, “there are others in her clan.”
“No there isn’t! I talked Mac Lir and Leumadair myself. They BOTH said that they didn’t think her marrying Leuma was a good idea. He says he loves her, but not like that….you know, not ‘that’ way.” Harry replied.
“Sirius?” Calli interrupted, “can I help? We all like you a lot, especially Sara, Mea and me. I think you’d make a great husband for Aunt Kitty…..actually, I thought you ‘were’ her husband already.” she admitted, blushing softly as she did.
Sirius smiled sweetly at her. “That is exactly the response I want from the rest of the clan, Calli. Luke and Duncan are going to talk to their father on my behalf, Orpha and Siobhan already seem to like me, Paddy and the boys don’t have a problem with me. Edana here is certainly very fond of me” he stated as he looked at Remus and the little girl, “and Harry, just so its not a horrible surprise to you. Orpha asked me officially last night about Edana. If they have to take her from Paddy, I’ve agreed to raise her as my own, with you and Cat.” Everyone in the room froze as they heard Calli gasp and sob loudly.
“Hey, no, Calli, what is it honey?” Sirius asked softly as he and Harry immediately went to her side, hugging her tightly as she buried her face in Sirius’s robes.
“Its not fair,” she wept, “Edana still has a family, her daddy’s still alive, and he’s right here. Its not fair that she gets two families and I don’t even have one anymore.”
Sirius felt like kicking himself, how could he have been so thoughtless, he had only wanted to spare Harry any shock if another member of the clan asked him about Edana, he certainly never meant to cause Callista any pain. Looking over to Remus, Sirius pleaded wordlessly for guidance, but realized by the look in his eyes, that Lupin was as out of his depth as he was.
“Sirius?” Harry questioned as he held his cousin tightly, feeling every bit as helpless as the others. “What about Callista? Can’t you and Mum take care of her too? I mean, she is coming back to the school with us, and I know Aunt Orpha and Aunt Lia talked to you about her too.”
“They did?!” Calli gasped as she looked up into Sirius’s eyes, “Did you tell them yes?” Not waiting for a reply, she turned immediately to Harry. “Did they say yes? What did Aunt Kitty say?”
“We didn’t say anything, yet.” Sirius stated softly but firmly. “You’re a bit older than Edana, its not as simple as taking in a baby….”
“You mean you only want…” Calli began.
“No, stop right there.” Sirius insisted. “It has nothing to do with age, not like you think it does anyway.” he took a deep breath as he led her towards the sofa, sitting her down between him and Harry, Sirius waited for Remus to take a chair before he continued. “Alright, Callista, first of all, remember, this is me talking, and I have no standing in the clan, at least not one that allows me to make these sort of decisions. So to be honest, you probably know more about this than I do.”
“The reason we haven’t given any sort of answer ‘is’ because you are older. You should have a say in this too. We didn’t want to say yes and have them ‘force’ you to go with us, you may be happier here with Siobhan and Bruid, or in Avalon with Luke and Leah, or maybe just being on your own within the clan. Cat and I were not about to make that decision for you, that wouldn’t have been right. You’re very close to being an adult, you should have a say in were you end up and with whom. Cat and I HAVE agreed to take you back to Hogwarts with us, ‘if’ we go back to Hogwarts. So at the very least, you’ll be with us until Spring sometime.”
They all sat in silence for several minutes, until Remus decided he had to lighten up the mood somehow. “You know, Padfoot, I think I liked it better when you were teasing me about the hickey.” he sighed.
“YOU got a hickey?” Harry gasped, “From who?”
“Uncle Remus?” Calli added, “You aren’t the one Uncle Duncan’s been teasing Auntie Tris about, are you?” seeing the bright blush on his face, Calli beamed, “Auntie Tris gave Uncle Remus a love bite.” she squealed as she squeezed Harry’s hand, laughing with him as Remus muttered something unintelligible under his breath.
“You brought it up, not me” Sirius winked. He handed Calli a tissue to wipe her face as he reached out for Edana “Come on, Uncle Remus, hand me back my little girl if you please.”
“Not on your life, she’s the only thing standing between me and …..would you two PLEASE stop it” Remus sighed as Harry and Calli made kissy faces at him. “Sirius, no one would ever doubt EITHER of them belong to you. They both have your bad sense of humour.”
“Poor, Moony” Sirius laughed as he rose from the sofa, kissing Edana’s forehead as he walked passed Remus. “Do me a favour and keep your eyes on my….’kids’… I think I should let Cat know what’s going on.” he explained, giving a knowing look to his old friend.
Remus nodded, Sirius was right, Cat needed to know about Calli’s little outburst as well as her feelings on the subject of her fostering. “No problem, maybe I’ll teach them how to change diapers while you’re away.” he grinned, laughing as Harry and Calli groaned with the very idea. Remus sat between them, smiling widely as he looked at them and at the baby. “So, Harry, do you miss being an only child?”…….
Sirius shook his head as he made his way towards the kitchen, hopefully Cat was still there, and even more hopefully she was eating as she said she would be. He couldn’t begin to describe the wave of relief that had passed over him earlier when she had told him how hungry she was. He didn’t even care if she ate nothing but biscuits and ice cream, he just wanted her to eat, she looked as though she had lost several pounds since they had been here, and he didn’t like it at all.
He also wondered how she would take the news about Callista. He knew in his heart that ‘he’ had had no right to talk to her about such matters. But he couldn’t let her there crying like that, he understood all to well what it was like to lose everyone and everything you ever cared about, it was a horrible empty feeling that left you feeling lost and alone. It wasn’t right for anyone to have to feel that way, especially a child.
Just as Sirius was about to enter the kitchen, he was nearly knocked over backwards by Amber running into him. “Whoa, calm down Amber, where’s the fire?” he teased, only to have his smile fall as he saw the look in her eyes. “Amber?”
“Sirius, thank heavens its you.” she gasped, “Something’s wrong with Kitty. She was reading some old letters and then she started shaking and just burst into tears. Lia’s with her now, she told me to find you and Orpha.”
“Go on, find Orpha” he encouraged her as he quickly turned and entered the room. His mind raced with possible reasons for Cat to be upset, had Snape written something cold hearted and hateful, had he accused her of ‘spreading her love around’, or perhaps she was feeling ill again, or then again, maybe she had finally realized what everyone else had been assuming, that she was with child.
He knew the moment he saw the look on Lia’s face that it was more than hurt feelings or shock that had put Cat in this state. Even considering her rather volatile emotional state over the past few days, this one was a humdinger. She was hunched over the table, her head buried in her arms as several letters poked themselves out from under her. “Lia, what happened?” Sirius asked as he rushed to Cat’s side.
“I don’t know, we found an old package that we tried to send her a while back, she was fine at first, looking at pictures and reading old letters. Then suddenly she read one letter, and immediately went through all the others, pulled two out and damn near tore them to pieces in her rush to read them. The first one had her pretty upset, but that was nothing compared to the second one, she just started sobbing when she read it, I can’t even reason with her.” Lia explained “And she’s going to get herself sick crying like this, it’s just not good for her. Sirius, see if you can get through to her, I’m waiting for Orpha to get here, maybe she can reach into her mind so we know what to do.”
Siri nodded his understanding to Lia as he knelt down beside Cat. “Gra, mo ionúin, talk to me, tell me what’s wrong.” he asked softly as he tenderly stroked her hair. “Gra….Cat….” he cringed as the only response he heard was her choked sobs.
“Sirius, you have to do something.” Lia whispered frantically, “this can’t be good for her, I’ve never seen her like this.”
“Come on now, Catrianna?” Sirius sighed as saw her shaking with the force of her sobs, “Oh, Kitten, why won’t you talk to me?” he asked as he gently pulled her arms off of the table, forcing her to look at him. His heart leapt into his throat when he saw the look in her eyes. Whatever had her so upset, it was obvious it had pushed her over the edge. “Come on, gra, talk to me. It can’t be that awful.”
The next thing he knew, Cat had flung her arms around his neck, sobbing pitifully against his chest as he instinctively held her tightly. “Shhh, Mo ionúin, muirneach aon” he cooed. “talk to me, tell me what I can do to help you.” He rocked her back and forth gently as he rained soft, tender kisses upon her head, doing his best to calm and soothe her.
“Perhaps you should take her upstairs.” Lia suggested as she saw several curious faces peeping into the kitchen to see what all the fuss was about. “I’ll send Orpha to you as soon as Amber brings her back.”
Sirius nodded his head in agreement, the last thing she needed was an audience, and he desperately needed to find out what had happened to cause such a reaction from her. Realizing very quickly that she was in no condition to walk, he gathered her in his arms, prepared to take her to her room. He hesitated momentarily as he saw what it was she had been reading, they weren’t Snape’s letters at all. His eyes flashed with understanding as he saw the pictures of James, Lily and Harry scattered about the table, along with several letters, one of which was in his own distinctive script. “Oh gods, Cat. You never got any of those?” he whimpered as he tightened his grip on her.
“I’m so sorry, all this time I thought you were still angry with me, ignoring me. I had no idea.” he whispered as he carried her to her bedroom…….
“Hey, Drew, wake up you sorry excuse for a Ravnos” the old man yelled as he nudged the young man with the tip of his boot.