Diplomacy - the art of letting someone have your way.
Why do blonds have square boobs --> Because they forgot to take the tissues out of the box.
The name is Baud......, James Baud.
How many blondes does it take to make chocolate-chip cookies --> 10. One to mix the dough and nine to peel the M&M's.
If I lived back in the wild west days, instead of carrying a six-gun in my holster, I'd carry a soldering iron. That way, if some smart-aleck cowboy said something like 'Hey, look. He's carrying a soldering iron!' and started laughing, and everybody else started laughing, I could just say, 'That's right, it's a soldering iron. The soldering iron of justice.' Then everybody would get real quiet and ashamed, because they had made fun of the solderi
Press any key... no, no, no, NOT THAT ONE!
The Vain Person: - One who loves the smell of his own farts.
What did the blonde think of the new computer --> She didn't like it 'cos she couldn't get channel 9....
I will listen with Love to what my body is telling me. Hey, I accept the fact that I'm in a shame spiral, but I still love myself & will keep taking the actions I need to take.
Real programmers don't document. 'If it was hard to write, it should be hard to understand.
A funny thing to do is, if you're out hiking and your friend gets bitten by a poisonous snake, tell him you're going to go for help, then go about ten feet and pretend that *you* got bit by a snake. Then start an argument with him about who's going to go get help. A lot of guys will start crying. That's why it makes you feel good when you tell them it was just a joke.
Why do blondes work seven days a week --> So you don't have to retrain them on Monday.
Error: Keyboard not attached. Press F1 to continue.
Why did the blonde scale the chain-link fence --> To see what was on the other side.
There are two kinds of pedestrians -- the quick and the dead.
The Strategic Person: - One who conceals his farts with loud laughter.
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