From Soap Opera News, date unknown
PC’s Jennifer Hammon is finally facing her past, including killing some mating frogs - and finding new ways to improve her present and future
"That’s exactly why I’ve been trying to look at all of these things I’ve done," she says. "I’m wrapping it up and cleaning it out. Looking at it and admitting it, that’s half the battle. Then there comes writing a person a letter to apologize for being a jerk. Make amends. Once you do that, it frees you."
One of the hardest things for Hammon to face has been something especially cruel she did as a 12-year-old, a scene that, unfortunately, plays over and over again in her head with great regret. "We were bad kids," Hammon says, somewhat shamefully as she recalls the dreadful night. "Every spring, frogs would migrate to our backyard because there was a water pond. They’d make the loudest noise right outside my bedroom. We’d go catch them, put them in cooler chests, then take them to the lake and dump them. Then they’d come back in two days. My friend Kirk McDonald and I got really mad one night, so we took the frogs and threw them against the side of the house. And they were mating at the time. They were one on top of the other. We threw them. Isn’t that awful! Can you imagine? You’re a frog, making love with your mate, you’re having a good ol’ time, you’re singing, and all of a sudden it’s the end of your life. I’m not proud of this. It’s the worst thing I’ve ever done - and I can’t believe I’m telling you."
"I realize what a terrible, terrible thing I did. It’s still stuck in my head. The point is, it’s in my past, but those are the kinds of things I’m trying to face and learn from. Acting helps you explore the dark sides of your personality but it also helps you so you can express them in a healthy way. That’s what I’m trying to do right now."
Self-discovery is Hammon’s goal. "I’m at a point where I’m trying to confront a lot of sides of myself that I don’t like, or hang-ups that I have. I’m trying to have better ethics in my life. It’s important to wake up and be able to confront myself. It’s not a bad thing. It’s scary, the thought of looking in the mirror and really seeing all the bad things you’ve done to hurt people in the past, even if they’re little things. But when you finally do it, it’s not that scary. You realize that you can change, that you can learn from it and make up for what you did. I’m ready now to clean up and really look at myself and really be able to let go."
Part of the process is learning to appreciate what you do have. "A lot of my lessons are about learning to be in present time, to look around and see what’s in front of me, rather than being completely distracted by the past or by what’s going to happen in the future," Hammon explains. "That’s the biggest lesson for me. There’s a perception about having a great job. But there are so many aspects of the business side of Hollywood that are just overwhelming sometimes, as opposed to the creative side. All the things you have to take care of and communicate with people to help you. It’s awesome, but it’s very, very hectic."
Her newfound outlook on life has also helped Hammon focus on what she needs to examine. "What’s your priority in your life? Is it going to be doing some mindless activity that’s a bad habit, like partying with friends every weekend? Or can you find something that is more constructive, that’s going to advance your life and make it fuller, richer?"
The success with her career has given Hammon confidence about life in general. "Everything in my life has made a 180-degree turn," she says. "I feel more certain and able to look at things clearly, not just myself but my relationships with people - and I’m more honest about things that I want. I suddenly am less worried about everything because I have the security. I’m someone motivated by the security aspect of things. I make secure choices. I want a relationship that’s secure. I need that."
The most important thing to Hammon is that she hasn’t compromised along the way. She has come to see that what you want to attract in your life, you will. "I think you can value security. But you can also value honesty and freedom and independence. You say what you want. You have intention in your life. You don’t settle for anything else because you admit it to yourself that you want it. Then you go and you grab it. You don’t let anything stop you."
Suddenly, Hammon gets quiet and a slight smile stretches on her face. "I like the idea that someone out there is going to read this and see that it’s possible to forgive yourself for the past and admit to your dream and say, ‘I’ve got to at least go out there and try.’ It’s a big leap if you’ve avoided it for a while. But leap and the net shall appear."
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Jennifer Hammon (Karen, PC) is cleaning house. Metaphorically speaking, that is. Upon learning that people spend 95 percent of their lives worrying about something they’ve done in the past or fretting about their future, Hammon has realized that the only way to move forward with life is to come to terms with the past.