Weird Stories


30 WAYS TO PISS SOMEONE OFF.
People You Know

1. When walking give them flat tires.
2. #1 every step.
3. Come by their house unexpectedly. Start singing.
4. Find their phone number and call. All the time.
5. Start offering them food and when they finally start screaming, tell them it was for "the guy next to them"
6. If they're on a date walk up and hug them and thank them for such a great time last night.
7. Take them out to dinner. Order the most expensive thing. Make them pay the bill.
8. Tell them about your bowel movements.
9. Pinch them.
10. #9 in the butt.
11. Offer them piggy back rides. All the time.
12. Hand them a walkie-talkie and start a conversation. Call them red leader.
13. #12 but when they don't say over start crying hysterically. When you stop say over calmly.

Strangers

14. Tell them how much you love him/her.
15. Knock any bags out of their hands while screaming "FIRE!!!!!!!"
16. Walk up next to them and hold their hand.
17. Kiss them good night in the middle of the day.
18. Run up to them and ask them if they remember you from "Bedwetters' Camp"
19. Walk up behind someone and pinch their fat and claim "Someone's getting a little fat..."

Your Spouse

20. Take them out to dinner and start staring at other men/women constantly.
21. Ask them about their day, and right when they start, without a word get up and go to the bathroom for half an hour.
22. Start watching "American Beauty" and ask your wife/husband and quote "Why can't our relationship be like theirs???"
23. In the middle of a conversation, get up and call your best friend. Tell them how boring your conversation just was----loudly.
24. Get up at 3:00AM turn on the light as you leave the room.
25. Put a ventriloquist doll that looks just like you at her/his office with a note saying, quote, "Do you know I'm watching your every move???!!!"
26. Sell their car.
27. Spit in their food.
28. Call them a different name all the time.
29. Quote their least favorite actor.
30. Sign him/her up for an A.A. meeting, even if their not an alcoholic.
PS: Don't actually do any of these things as it will seriously offend the people you are around. And you can kiss your social life good-bye.


Lotsa more to come! But, since every story is so long, I will be putting in links hehe! :)