Well I haven't been happy lately, been quite depressed a lot actually. So I was sitting around thinking (there's a surprise!) and I realized why I'm not happy.

I started out thinking about when I could last remember when I was really happy, and I realized that was when I was with Travis. So then I wanted to figure out if that was just coincidence, or he was the reason I was unhappy.

So I've been dating all these other guys, and I will start out liking them for a day or two, and then when I get to know them well enough to realize they're not gonna be Travis, I don't want to be around them anymore. I haven't met a guy so far that is even half as good as Travis, and I'm not exaggerating.

He is so stinkin wonderful, and we never fought. Never. We were kinda laughin about that yesterday, saying that maybe that was part of our problem, because it seems like EVERYONE else our age fights with their boyfriend/girlfriend all the time. But we just didn't have anything to fight about. We were so in love. I'm serious.

My mom even told me one time, after we had broken up, that she knew we would get back together because she could tell by the way he looked at me that he really loved me. And he did. I know it. I'm a fool. We really were in love, too. Most people are age aren't. But we were. I mean, we never did anything more than kiss, so it definitely wasn't a physical relationship. And we didn't become attracted to the outside of each other, because we got to know each other on here before we ever started hanging out. And we weren't together just because there was no one else because believe me (not to brag or anything, but) I had plenty of other offers.

Gosh I miss him! But I wouldn't dare tell him. Not after everything I've already put that poor boy through. He deserves better, and I don't plan on stopping him from finding it. I just wish we had to wear our hearts on our sleaves. Life would be much less complicated. There might be a few more broken hearts, but we would be better off in the long run. I mean, that way everyone would always know how everyone else felt about them. It would be awesome. No game playing or anything. Oh well, that just ain't gonna happen. So I guess I'll have to deal.

Later!