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When worlds bend....
As you all know, things
didn't go quite well for us in Grenpoli. Yet, there is one thing in particular that
happened there that really pissed me off. See if you can guess what it was....
"You want to know what happened? Well, I'm just the person to tell you the RIGHT side of the story. It was our first day at Stieg's house and I had some business to take care of, so I told the kids I'm going out for a while. Thing's went pretty well, I went to a tavern, got drunk and gambled away everything I had. OK, maybe I talked to some people about Steig and the rest. You can't blame me for it, I was drunk! Anyway, I got back a few hours later and went straight to sleep. The next day I got up, thanked the powers that dwarves don't get hangovers, and went about my business. Around midday, someone came knocking on our door. I was that wretched creature that took all my money last night and I wanted a re-match. I was about to open the door when that brute Galdriel stopped me. She ordered me to be quiet (yeah, right, like I take orders from HER). Still, I decided to humor her this time and waited quietly until he finally gave up and went away. At that point Steig woke up, wondering what all the noise was about. I told him all that happened last night and he didn't seem too happy. He went back to his room and slammed the door. At that point, Galdriel and the rest turned to me saying that I put everyone in danger and stuff like that. What a pathetic bunch! Those kids haven't realized yet that I'm native to Ba'ator and I can do whatever I want here! It doesn't really matter though, I don't really care what they think. After all, they're just kids. Anyway, I still had some business to do in Grenpoli so I wanted to go out again, but nooo, the big dumb brute had made up her narrow little mind that none shall go out! Who the fuck died and made her queen? Of course, an argument broke, but it was clear that she was stuck in her ways, and the rest had the nerve to back her up. She stood in the doorway and blocked the exit. There wasn't much I could do. I used my magic to find another way out. That stupid girl really thought she could keep me in. ha! After a long day of bartering and bargaining, I fell to some misfortune. A couple of Baatezu jumped me from behind and knocked me out cold. The next few hours are a bit blurred, all I remember was being chained to a wall, an Erinyes kept asking me lots of questions about Stieg while an ugly Barbazu pulled my toenails one by one. I don’t remember much as I kept falling in and out of consciousness. I do remember that at some point a familiar character broke in, it was Steig. He banished the Baatezu and dragged me back to his house. All the kids were there, but they didn't seem concerned with my well being. Actually, the looked pretty pissed off. They started shouting stuff about an Erinyes who got in disguising herself as me and attacked them. They said a lot of other stuff too but I wasn't listening. I was busy communing with the world, trying to find a way out of this mess. It was clear to me that they were very close to booting me out. I've been there before. The last party I was in didn't parish like I told them, they got sick of me so they left me to die in that prison cell. I decided I would not let this happen again. Suddenly a great idea came to me, and that's when things started to get weird. Time seemed to go backwards, until I was finally back to the first day when I got out and got drunk. However, this time the Baatezu got me on my way back so I was never there to argue with Galdriel, now it was all the Erinyes' fault! What I splendid solution, I managed to make a fool out of them by doing what I wanted no matter what they said, and still, they could not blame me for it! All can say is: THANK YOU WORLD FOR SAVING MY HIDE! |
