My Poetry

These are just a few of my poems. I write my poetry on what i feel. If they are of any disappointment to you, just remember, im not here to impress anyone...Enjoy...

p.s.
updated poems will be coming soon. (3-13-02)

Loss of Love
I have no wounds
Visible to the eye,
But still i die from them.
They're cut too deep,
Without an inch.
They bleed deep red,
Without a drip.
Sink into my soul,
Which is keeping me whole.
While i fall apart.
Stabbing more every minute.
Shredding without a mark.
I cant believe you
Left me here in the dark.
The dark that can kill,
Or make a person deeply ill.
Why did u do this to me?
Why did you leave me?
Answer me is all I ask.
Tell me why,
Before this darkness takes my soul.


Crystal Bearden and Robert Bearden

I Want to be There
I want to be there
when u make your next move-
When u reveal your razor teeth-
When you take that life saving bite-
When u drink that crimson red blood-
I will be there,
Standing next to you as an immortal..
We will live in the darkness
and feed on souls.
from dusk till dawn
we will walk
and drink their lives away..

Crystal Bearden
01 11 01

My World
im feeling cold now
as everything goes darker.
where am i going to?
i cry as i loose my mind..
i see a little girl..
shes smiling as if she knows
something i dont.
then i suddenly realise
who that girl is..
ME...
me before i became down with the sickness
me before i met you
me before all this death
for she was me.
its all fading and so is
her smile.
i scream so silent and cry so dry.
now i have found my place to hide.
inside this little world......
can i call it mine?

Crystal Bearden

Sickness
i have a sickness
that hides inside.
inside of me
is where it hides.
i wont let it out
afraid of what might happen
but one of these days,
its going to come out..
bursting like a flame,
killing me inside.
inside of this darkness, where i roam.
inside my head, it cannot hold.
all this pain,
all this suffering,
is yours that i have taken.
and when it shows its face and leaves
my body,
i will be smiling....
while i am dying...

Crystal Bearden

Different
You and me,
we are not the same.
i am different in many ways.
i am myself,
while u follow many..
i act like me,
while u try to be they.
i am not human,
for you are by far.
i am Me,
nothing like u at all..

Crystal Bearden
12-23-00

Finally
finally you realise
the pain i have inside.
inside of me
is where it hides.
away from people,
is where you will find me.
crying in the corner,
PAIN LEAVE ME BE.
Leave my body,
my soul,
Please, just leave me alone!


Crystal Bearden

I Will Remember
I Will remember the day i met you
The look you gave me, was it true?
You left me incomplete
and those memories still remain.
The day you died,
was it all a lie?
I could have cried,
for it was part of my soul.
That night, rain poured down
as if the whole world was crying
I stood outside and just stared up
into the dark sky.
I asked why?
and the rain came harder.
I asked what did i do?
and the rain became colder.
I asked what does she have?
the rain turned to ice.
I looked up into the sky that night
and then silently closed my eyes.
A thunder rolls in the distance
and it whispers to my soul.
My heart is full of pain,
and I will never again be sane....
01-28-01

The Storm
The sky turns dark, for it starts to cry.
It thunders, and shows the pain of its heart.
The winds start to become strong, and whispers to my ears.
Ice starts to pour to show how it is coming near.
Bright flashes of lightning in the distance, lighting up this dark world.
The world is now on pause and all is silent.
The winds are now becoming violent.
Whipping through the streets full of sorrow and agony.
People start to run and hide,
for they know of no truth.
Their lives are a joke,
For mine is the funniest of all.
AS the whipping storm continues,
The people run and find their place to hide.
I crawl into my mind where i can now slowly die...
01-28-01

Let Me
I can see dark,
for i cant see the light.
I can feel your breath,
For i cant see your body.
I can hear your breathing,
For i cant find you.
I can now see a path,
For it leads to a darker place.
darker than this world,
Darker than u could ever imagine.
I step in,
I fall out.
I fall in,
I step out.
Let me see you,
Let me find you.
Let me be with you,
Let me be behind you.
You shall lead me into this place,
for you are the creator,
The mind of this devil,
This is where we will settle.
You and me,
Here all alone.
Left here in this cold.

The Real You
(Dedicated to William D.)
Let me know the real you.
Show me the his face.
Scared, all alone,
Running at a slow pace.
I want to know you
Not the one you try to be
Show me your feelings,
you could try atleast.
i want to learn of you.
I want to know of you.
The real you.
Scared, alone, hurt, full of fears..
Show me the face and shed
your tears...

WHY?
i take your pain
every day and in every way
Pain that cuts
Pain that burns
Pain that has no reason
to cut away like a knife
to burn away full of strife.
Why feel pain?
Why cause pain?
why live this life,
of the insanes?

Questions Unanswered
I sit alone
Day by day
Wondering where
My life went wrong

Was it my cry for help?
The feelings i felt?
Or was it the way i treated my self?

I cant take no more
What is this life for?
To be alone?
And remember we mean nothing?

I mean nothing
And my soul is gone
take your time,
when i am gone,
you will feel me.....
Dead

The Black Sun

I need a way out..
a place where i can figure
out all of my doubts.
Sick and scared
of life and its pain.
Scared to run,
As i am deathly
scared of the black sun.
No looking back now.
I dont know where
i became to feel this way-
or even how..
The black sun just took
one glance down
and there i was,
sad and all alone..
Where to go?
Where to live my life,
so pethetic and low?
Where to find silence?
Where to find a place
with no violence?
I cant run anymore..
I cant cry anymore..
I cant feel pain..
I have gone insane.
Cut it away,
Please dont let it stay.
so many scars,
Im trapped inside these bars.
let me out,
im ready to die.
there are no more tears to cry.
no more voice to scream.
No more of this life,
even though its just a dream....

Crystal B
03 26 01

I Cant
I dont know what to do.
i search and search,
but i cant find a clue.
I cant take anymore pain.
You alone is driving me insane.
i cant take anymore of your bullshit.
you keep digging at my mind like its a hopeless pit.
I cant take anymore of your lies.
You make me feel like i wanna die.
I cant take anymore of your apologies.
You have dropped me down to my knees.
i cant take any more of your self-pity.
You trap me in this hateful city.
I cant take anymore of you.
I think that that should be my clue..
Crystal B.
03 28 01

R.I.P.

rest in peace my friend
for noone can take your place
im sure you went to a land
where there isnt a hateful face
you deserved much better
than what you got
your body deserves much more
than to just be buried and for it to rot
in your hole
and
without a soul
now you are free
and trapped away is we
we live this life of pain
while u are gone and
away from the insane
rest in peace my friend
i hope u get this pethetic poem
in which i send.

Crystal B.
03 29 01

Hide Away
I hide away
from many things
Things i fear,
things i hate.
Afraid they'll find me,
Afraid they'll deny me
the things I've lost,
the things i have found.
Ive hid away
for most of my life.
Trying to run away,
full of strife.
Find me now,
for it is my time,
come for me now,
i need my life to go down..

Crystal B.
02-13-01