Title: A Change of Face
Author: Granitite Stone, granitite@yahoo.com
Summary: Nothing is absolute. Our paths can be changed in an instant, and nothing will be the same. NOT PART OF STRANGE BEDFELLOWS!
Web Address: www.angelfire.com/weird/cobalite/index3.html
Pairing: AJ/Marshall
Rating: R

It was easy to find Justin. Their tours didn't exactly run parallel, but some days he was just a few cities away. Some days, they were actually in the same city. Tonight was one of those times. Justin wasn't even hard to spot, in the darkness of the club nearest their venue. He was sitting in a booth, watching Chris on the dance floor. He didn't even notice at first when AJ sat down. "I don't get it."

Justin's head snapped in his direction. "Where the hell did you come from?"

"If you're really that naive, Timberlake, then maybe I should just leave right now and leave you to stare at him." He watched Justin go a little red. "Or, we can help each other."

"How could we possibly help each other?" Justin was embarrassed at being caught staring, and just wanted AJ to go away.

"You know who I am, don't you Timberlake?" He saw the nod. "Good. It's nice to know all the things you say about liking rap isn't PR bullshit. Now, as for what we can do for each other… I want you to get exactly what you want."

"What does it matter to you what I want?" It slowly began to dawn on him. "The rumors are true. You and Marshall-"

"Chris wants him back. Neither of us want that to happen." AJ reached out, ran a finger over Justin's exposed palm. "I think we can help each other. We can separate Marshall and Chris once and for all."

"You want to help me with my little… problem?" Justin seemed surprised. "You know why he won't do anything with me, right?"

"I know. And right about now, I'm willing to do anything to keep Chris far away from Marshall." He glanced back onto the floor. "Even you."

"Why is he so important to you?"

"Because I need him." He stood up. "You coming?"

"I'd better." Justin grinned, and rose from the booth.
-----
He was young, with a great body that came from working out for hours and then running around on a stage every night. He was eager, and like a vise inside. For a virgin, he was remarkably calm, and as a dancer, he was extremely flexible. Justin should have been a great fuck. Should have been, being the operative words. AJ had never felt dirtier in his entire life than when he rolled off of Justin, and that included the blow job he'd given to the record exec that wanted to cut the track that was supposed to be their first single.

Those baby blue eyes were staring at the back of his head. "Did I do something wrong?"

"No." AJ felt bile at the back of his throat. "No, you didn't do anything wrong. In fact, Chris is probably going to be floored."

"I want to thank you." He ran a gentle touch down AJ's back. "We both get what we want this way."

"Just tell me," AJ jerked away. "Why not go find some stranger?"

"I couldn’t trust a stranger not to hurt me. You, you benefit if I had a good time." Justin had just proved all blondes weren't brain dead. "I knew you wouldn't hurt me."

'No, I just hurt myself.' AJ reached for his pants. "Not a word to anyone, you understand? This stays between us. If Kirkpatrick or Marshall ever found out, we'd both be screwed."

"Not a word." Justin smiled. "You gonna give me a goodbye kiss?"

There was that bitter taste again. "No." He practically ran for the door.
-----
Marshall showed up in his hotel room three days later. AJ hadn't been expecting him, not for at least another week. He was still feeling incredibly guilty, and finding Marshall asleep in his bed after a show didn't really help. He kicked off his shoes, and sat on the edge of the bed. "What are you doing here?"

"Wanted to talk to you." Marshall sat up with a yawn. "You look like you haven't slept since I saw you last. I thought the nightmares were getting better."

They had been, but things had just gotten worse since he'd fucked Justin. "I don't want to talk about it."

"Fine. I flew through three time zones to get here, and the jet lag is killing me, so get into bed, and we can both get some sleep." Marshall flopped back down as AJ stripped.

"What was so important you flew halfway across the country?" He slid in between the sheets, just outside Marshall's embrace. He didn't want to be touched.

Marshall didn't give him much choice. He was quickly pulled close. "I wanted to explain some things to you. First of all, I don't still love Chris. I haven't for a long time. Probably since the second time we broke up. He was just comfortable."

No. No, he did not want to hear this. Not now, not after what he'd done. Please, god, not now!

"And I haven't been pity fucking you. You don't need anybody's pity. You're Johnny No Name, you're Alex McLean. You're a guy who had some bad luck with a girl he loved. And as for how I feel about you…"

He was going to hell. He'd done something terrible, thinking it was the only way, only to find out it meant nothing in the long run. AJ couldn't hear this, but it would look just a little odd if he ran screaming from the room.

"You're something else, Alex. I have looked for years to find someone who understands what it was like for me, who understands what it's like to be a no one who nobody cared about, to suddenly be a household name. So, I guess…"

'Don't say it. Please, if anyone out there is listening, don't let him say it!' Panic welled up inside AJ.

"We're good together. And maybe I do love you." His fingers stroked across AJ's forearm, over the tattoo for Bugz. "I should have told you before. But, saying that, it isn't really my style."

'You're a horrible person. You got Tina killed, and now look what you did to Marshall. No wonder no one ever stays with you.'

Marshall mistook AJ's silence for something else. "Alex… isn't that what you wanted to hear? Because you don't have to say it back. You can forget I even said it. I just thought you should know."

AJ wondered how hot the fires were going to be. "No, I…" He rested his forehead against Marshall's chest. "Thank you."

"You don't have to thank me." A kiss was pressed to the side of AJ's neck. "You have thousands of people screaming your name every night. One more person in love with you can't make that much of a difference."

"But somehow, it does." He turned around to face Marshall. "I don't deserve you."

"What the hell does that mean?" Marshall laughed. "Like you've done something so terrible recently."

Definitely going to hell.
-----
Chris was used to Justin crawling all over him. He was used to Justin trying to get a hand down his pants, a tongue down his throat. And he was used to letting it only go so far. "No."

"Yes." Justin's lips closed over his again. "You want to. You know you do. I want you, Chris. Please."

"No." Over the past year or so, it had gotten harder and harder to say no to Justin, but he would keep saying it. He had to. "I won't. Not while-"

"What if I said I wasn't?" Then he attacked Chris' neck with a vengeance.

"What?" Chris pushed him away. "What the hell did you do, Justin?"

Justin sighed. "I went out and got myself fucked. What did you think I was going to do?"

"I…" Chris had never really thought about it. "You…you shouldn't have done that, Justin. What if he goes to the press?"

"He won't." Justin assured him, leaning back in.

"You shouldn't have just…" He trailed off as Justin licked his collarbone. "It should have been someone special."

"I tried that. He wouldn't come near me." Justin pulled back a little. "You didn't give me much choice, Chris. I want you, I've always wanted you. Tell me you haven't noticed."

Oh, he'd noticed, and so had the little Chris residing in his pants. "Why me?"

"Because love doesn't have to make sense."
-----
"Earth to Marshall, this is you best friend speaking."

Marshall looked up from the magazine he'd been pretending to read. He hadn't turned a page in ten minutes. "What did you say?"

"You look like a man with a problem." Howie sat down next to him. "No one reads that slow."

"I’m thinking." He closed the latest teenybopper magazine. "I got a voicemail from Justin last night."

Great, just what they needed. "What did he say?" Marshall wordlessly handed over his cell.

//Hi, Marshall! This is Justin Timberlake. I just called to say I don't think Chris will be bothering you anymore. The best man finally won.//

"Oh." What did you say after hearing that? "Marshall, he's probably lying."

"Chris stopped calling two days ago." For some reason, Marshall didn't sound too depressed about that.

"Are you repressing?" Howie couldn't believe Marshall had said that with a smile. "A ten year relationship just ended, and you seem happy about it."

"I think I am." He laughed. "It wasn't a ten year relationship, Howie. It was a year and a half, a break up, two years, a break up, and four years of on and off while Justin tried to get him into bed. He did, and now it's over."

"I'm not so good with this break up stuff, but shouldn't you be punching walls and throwing things?" Howie was at a loss. The last time Marshall and Chris broke up, they'd had to redo part of wardrobe because Chris had bought him one of the costumes.

"I'm over it. I'm tired of being in love with a light switch."

"And it's time to find someone who'll always be lit up?" Howie frowned when Marshall nodded. "This is about Johnny, I mean Alex, isn't it?"

"Give the man a cigar." Marshall stood up, and headed for the door. "Speaking of the devil, I'd better call him."

"Marshall… tell me you're not."

"I’m not going to lie to you, Howie." Marshall leaned back in, hanging onto the doorframe. "I'm definitely over Chris, and maybe… just maybe I've fallen for Alex."

"You're fucking nuts!" It was Nick. He'd come up behind Marshall, unnoticed. "You're being played, Marshall, I know it. You think he feels anything for you, that he could feel anything for you? When you said it, did he say it back? People have shoved you around enough, you don't need some rapper tearing you to shreds."

"Shut up." Marshall spun around, barely controlling his anger. "You, you don't understand anything. The only person on this planet that actually hates you, beside our rival's fans, is another infant pop star. You grew up having everyone love you. No one ever knocked you around and told you you were worthless. So, you don't get any say in what I feel."

Nick stared at Marshall. "When he hurts you, I won't say I told you so."
-----
Backstreet's tour wrapped up, and they went home. After the incident at the club last night, (Author's Notes: See Prologue) they went somewhere else to avoid Nick. Marshall dragged AJ out onto the floor, eager to dance to something not choreographed. AJ was still feeling guilty, so he was willing to do what ever Marshall wanted.

Little did they know they were being watched. "I just don't understand what he has that I don't." Chris was actually pouting into his drink. "Maybe he's developed a thing for younger men."

"You've always had one." Justin stole his drink. "Chris, I wish you wouldn't ogle him. It makes me feel insecure, or like Dirty Diana."

"Dirty Diana?" The song rung a vague bell in Chris' mind, but Justin was the one who worshipped Michael Jackson.

"Yeah, you know." Justin put on his best diva expression. "He's not coming back because he's sleeping with me!"

They got a few odd looks, and Chris hissed, "Keep it down. I'm sorry, alright? I just… I don't get it. You think he's good in bed?"

Justin choked on an ice cube and Chris whacked him on the back. "I," He gasped. "I wouldn't be the best judge."

"I guess not. It takes practice to guess just by looking." Chris looked back to the floor. "I mean, you've only slept with one other guy and I bet it wasn't Johnny No Name." Justin didn't say anything, just spat out chewed ice. "Was it? Justin, tell me you didn't."

"Well I did." Justin looked pissed. "For some reason, I'm in love with you, and I knew you wanted me. But you wouldn't do anything as long as I stayed the vestal virgin. What the hell was I supposed to do?"

Chris wasn't listening. He was making a beeline for Marshall and AJ on the dance floor. He tapped AJ on the shoulder. "Let's chat, McLean. Right now, before I break your nose."

"What do you want?" Marshall looked annoyed. "Justin called me, Chris. I already know."

That only made Chris angrier, because of course he misunderstood. "You knew he fucked Justin?"

"You fucking liar." Marshall looked at AJ. "Tell me it isn't true, and I'll believe you."

AJ looked at his shoes. "I… Marshall, it's not what you think."

"So you didn't fuck him?"

"No, I did but-"

Marshall didn't care if it was a girly thing to do, he slapped AJ. "God, I cannot fucking believe Nick was right!" He seethed, looking at Chris. "I have to get out of here. Are you coming?"

Chris glanced across the room to where Justin sat, head pillowed on his arms, body giving the occasional shudder. "Yeah." He walked beside Marshall as they fought their way through the crowd.

AJ found himself in a back hallway, sinking slowly to the ground, back to the wall. His fist was pressed to his forehead, and those that walked by could hear him mutter, "Fucked up, love him, ruined everything."
-----
End of Chapter Five

Questions, comments, and concerns about my sanity should go to granitite@yahoo.com
Choose Your Poison at www.angelfire.com/weird/cobalite/index3.html 
~ When I look into the mirror, and see a face I don't recognize, I am no longer surprised.