Title: Shards -- Fragments of Truth
Author: Granitite Stone, granitite@yahoo.com
Disclaimer: If they were mine, would I be writing fanfiction?
Rating: R
Distribution: Ask and ye shall receive
Website: Choose Your Poison at my sister's site, who's nice enough to host my stories. https://www.angelfire.com/weird/cobalite/index.html
Author's Notes: This is an ALTERNATE ending to Strange Bedfellows. What occurred at the end of "A Picture Says A Thousand Words" was not a dream, or anything of the sort. This story was written for two reasons. Marshall and AJ are so fun to torture, and I couldn't decide which ending I liked better. So, I present Shards, which is not a happy ending, just a different one. Also note that for the first time, Marshall will be referred to as Marshall in this story.

She poured herself a drink and AJ did his best to ignore the smell. "You. I don't believe it."

"I don't get it either. Brain damage, you know." He tapped his scar, making an unconscious pun.

"I just… can't believe that all that time, Alex was… boyband. You're one of the last people I'd imagine Marshall palling around with." Kim set down her glass and studied him for a minute. "Next thing you know he'll be rapping with Justin Timberlake."

"I can't get the real story out of anyone. He and my mom are dating, so he's in on the conspiracy to hide my past."

Kim burst out laughing. "I knew that bastard was cheating on me. Couldn't have told me this last year when it would have meant a bigger settlement."

"Sorry." He so didn't mean that. AJ was beginning to understand 'Kim' now. This woman was a real bitch to drink in front of him.

"Why come to me? My slut of an ex-husband doesn't tell me anything."

"I thought… I thought you'd know everyone pretends he hates me. Except for Hailey."

"If it's true," She finished her drink. "You were always around, especially right before the shooting. I think… Hailey came home babbling about an anniversary. Maybe the two of you were planning something to surprise what's her name."

"Denise." Oh… what a bitch. AJ left angry, and once again more confused than before.
------
Flashback
*****
"Just… kill me, a'right?"

"This is what happens when you tour in a group." His hand touched a hot forehead. "It's a vicious circle. Someone's always sick."

"Fuck." A cough. "Damn make-up girl sneezes on me the one tour date I was on this week, and now I've got the fucking flu."

"Poor baby."

"Don't start with me." It was snarled. "Go home and leave me to die."

"Don't be stupid. Go back to sleep. I can stick around, take a later plane."
*****
AJ gave his alarm clock an annoyed look. "I’m going to go crazy if this goes on much longer. Between Marshall and my mystery man, I'm starting to wish I was still in a coma."

He was due in the studio in twenty minutes. Howie'd told him to bring his lyrics book, which AJ had finally found under his bed. He didn't actually remember writing any of them, but he believed the guys that he had. They had maybe a week left in Florida before Kevin shipped them to LA to do some final mixing on the tracks.

"AJ, you in there?" Nick. Nick had practically moved in. In fact, Nick was here more than AJ.

"Just a sec." A piece of paper was pasted onto the inside back cover. Funny, AJ didn't know he was a compulsive doodler. Type written, it was a poem. 'What We Are?'

"AJ?" Nick stuck his head in. "We're gonna be late again, and Kev's gonna kill us."

"Who wrote this?" AJ knew, just knew it had something to do with his 'forgotten love' as Sarah called him. "Did I? Or did the boyfriend that doesn't exist?"

"I… let me see." Nick read it to himself. "Love. What is love?" He quickly shut the book. "I… I think we should go."

"Nick, everyone knows you can't keep a secret." AJ was slowly backing Nick into a corner. "It would be easier for all of us, especially you, if you just give me a name right now."

Nick groped blindly for the doorknob. "He'd kill me."

"Let me worry about Kevin." AJ was close enough to see Nick sweating.

"Not Kevin." Nick twisted the handle and was free.

"Who then? What's the big deal? Just tell me." AJ was ready to snap. 'Love Is.' Someone loved him that much, and they were all pretending it had never happened. There was something in that poem, some clue he'd missed. What was it?

"I promised him, okay? I can't believe I'm saying this, but apparently he really did love you. That's why he's staying away from you."

"How does that help me?" Especially when it felt so wrong waking up alone all the time, but worse waking up next to Sarah. "Do you understand what this is like for me, Nick? I lost five years, and no one will fill in the blanks. I'm going to go crazy if I don’t know who it was. I have to know."

"I won't tell you! He blames himself, and I blame him too, okay? He was a miserable bastard who hated all of us, and he almost got you killed. Leave it alone!" Nick headed for the car, and wouldn't say another word.

'I thought I was shot in Detroit.' Maybe that was how he knew Marshall? Did they have a mutual friend somewhere? There was only one way to find out.
-----
Three days later, he found Marshall on his mother's couch, a notebook in his lap. He wasn't writing exactly, just doodling in the margins.

AJ was suddenly annoyed by his presence. "Don't you have a home?"

Marshall looked up, feeling a little like a deer in the headlights. "I told Denise I needed a new couch. She decided to 'help' me. You know how many furniture stores there are in Orlando?"

"Sorry man." He pulled Marshall's feet off the couch and sat down. "Shopping with Mom, never fun."

If he got up and fled the room just because AJ had touched him, it would look kinda odd. "And I thought Kim was bad. Twelve stores. Can't even feel my fucking feet."

"Can I ask you something?" AJ suddenly remembered his idea. "How long have we known each other?"

'Fuck.' Marshall picked his pen again, trying not to fidget. "Little over two years."

"Now, you don't bullshit. I know you'll tell me the truth. Did you know who I was dating?"

'Oh fuck. Get a grip, Marshall.' "Yeah, I know him."

So they probably had met through Marshall. "Who is he? How did we get together?"

The truth was an easy lie. "Let's just say the two of you had a few mutual vices. As for who… I'm not gonna tell you. Trust me Alex, you're better off without him."

"I don't get the big fucking secret!" AJ was so sick of this. "He can't be any worse than you, Marshall. I did a little research. You're probably the most fucked up person this side of… Hell, I can't think of anyone more screwed up."

"Just as bad." (I hate this.) "If I want to fuck up my life, I'll fuck up my life."

"You already did that." Marshall stood.

"Leave it alone, Alex."

"Were we friends?" He asked Marshall's back. "Everyone but my nearest and dearest seems to think so."

"No. We were never friends." AJ was sick of being lied to.

Marshall wandered into the kitchen. "I'm getting out of here before I do something I regret."

"Like what?" She set her book down on the table.

"Like throw him down on the nearest flat surface." Marshall opened the back door. "I'm gonna be gone a few weeks. When I come back, you can resume your campaign to save my soul."

"I'll see you then." Denise laughed and followed him onto the back porch. On impulse, she gave him a kiss on the cheek, like she'd do to AJ. "Don't get arrested."

Marshall rubbed at his cheek. "Fine. Look, Denise, I like you and all, but you can't do shit like that. Anyone gets a picture, and Gerri drops me faster than their careers ended."

"You like her that much?" She wasn't sure if his moving on was a good thing or a bad thing.

"No. But she doesn't think I'm a homicidal maniac that'll kill her in her sleep, and that's something." It wasn't anything. Not anymore.
-----
LA, and a party thrown by one of Howie's friends. Backstreet was here for 'face time.' Sarah on his arm, AJ was working the crowds. "They're all lying to me."

"I’m sorry I'm not more help." She smiled at a camera. "It's not like we're Britney and Justin and I was privy to all your secrets. We didn't talk before."

"It's a conspiracy." Plaster on a fake grin for the camera. "Even Mom's boyfriend is in on it."

"Eminem and Denise. Now that is creepy."

"Speak of the devil." Crossing the room, holding a pair of wine glasses, was Marshall. His arm slipped around the waist of a woman AJ could actually place, 'Ginger Spice,' and she took one of the glasses, giving him a kiss. "What the hell?"

"AJ," She'd been warned his fuse was even shorter now. "Considering you're standing here with your fake girlfriend, let's not go jumping to conclusions."

"Oh, I'm not jumping. That isn't faked. I know fake." He could feel the anger burn inside of him. He didn't think about why he was this angry. It wasn't like Marshall was cheating on him.

"AJ, you cannot get into a fight with Eminem." Sarah's voice was a low hiss. "God, last year he pistol whipped some guy in a bar. You want to get yourself shot again?"

"Don't worry." He gave her his soda. "I can take care of myself."

"Yeah, that's why you have a hole in your head!" Sarah's shout was ignored by everyone but the reporters.

Gerri was the first one to spot him. "Boyband at three o'clock and he's making a beeline for us."

"Fuck." Marshall set down his glass as AJ arrived on the scene, wearing an obviously faked smile. "Something I can do for you, Alex?"

"Just need a word with you, Marshall."

Gerri looked between the two of them. "Marshall? The two of you are on first name basis?"

"Don't even think it, Gerri." If she figured it out, she'd tell, and there was nothing Marshall could do about it.

"Coming?"

"I'll be right back." He followed AJ into a hallway. "A'right, what's your problem?"

"My problem is," AJ slammed Marshall against the wall. "If found you on the West Coast whoring it while my mom's back home thinking we're both in studio."

"I am in the studio, and I told you-" A fist met his stomach, then again, and again. "Bastard. Let go'a me!" Fuck, AJ was strong when he was mad. Marshall couldn't get free.

"No one cheats on a McLean, I'm telling you." AJ leaned in close. "I should have known someone like you couldn't be trusted to keep it in his pants."

"Fuck you. What I do or who I do is none of your business. Now back the fuck off!" Marshall reminded his body that at this particular point in time, being pressed into a wall by this man wasn't a good thing.

Another fist met Marshall's stomach as someone else entered the hall. "AJ, what the hell are you doing?" It was Howie. "Let go of him!"

AJ let go and Marshall slid to the floor. "Howie-"

His best friend ignored him. "Marshall, you okay?"

He rubbed his shoulders where AJ had been holding him. "You put a leash on him, Dorough. We don’t want my girl to get the right idea." Yet another cryptic comment AJ didn't understand.

"Howie-" AJ tried to speak again.

"Shut up, AJ." Howie pulled Marshall to his feet. "You could have done better than a Spice Girl."

"Dre's worried about my image." He flipped AJ off, meaning it quite literally, as he left the room. "I was told to get a girlfriend."

He'd been wrong. AJ couldn’t believe it. "Howie?"

"Are you drunk?" Howie sounded disgusted.

"No!"

"Then you're just an idiot. What the hell was that about?"

AJ couldn't explain the rage he'd felt when he'd seen Marshall with that woman.
-----
Kevin was pissed. AJ got 'grounded' until they left LA, and when they got back his mother was furious. "How many times did I tell you it wasn't like that?"

AJ felt about five years old. "A lot."

Denise just shook her head. "You'll behave?"

"Yes, Mom." Three years old now.

"Good boy." She patted him on the head. "Go find my address book?"

"Why?"

"I need Dre's number. If anyone saw the two of you…" Denise trailed off, walking into the living room.

AJ went into her room and started digging through the junk on her desk.

Teen Beat. Fan letters for him. Framed picture of him and Marshall. Address book! "Wait a second."

A framed picture of him and Marshall. On the couch. In a very friendly pose. And suddenly it all made sense.

'It's trashing Kim together.'
'Help me find Denise and Marshall.'
'You were always around.'
'He blames himself.'
'No. We were never friends.'

"Alex?" Denise was calling for him, but AJ didn't hear.

He gently touched the glass, in a kind of shock. "It's been you all along."

End of Chapter

Author's Notes: You are all very lucky people. My original plan was to end it right there, but Sailor Twilight talked me out of it. There will be one more chapter, and I will resolve everything. Now, I have a few things to say to help you understand this a little better. The couch Marshall's replacing? It's the one he and AJ fucked on right before the shooting. Marshall dating Ginger Spice? Not a product of my twisted mind, it's actually true. The song he refers to? Slim Anus by Insane Clown Posse. If you want a copy, ask and I'll email it to you. The poem AJ finds is 'What We Are.' It's already been posted if you haven't read it yet.

Also, I've decided to take a poll. Who wrote What We Are? I honestly don't know. Anyone who writes to me with their reasons gets a shout out in the final chapter.

Well, what do you think? Questions, comments, and concerns about my sanity should go to granitite@yahoo.com
Choose Your Poison at www.angelfire.com/weird/cobalite/index3.html 
~ When I look into the mirror, and see a face I don't recognize, I am no longer surprised.
AIM: Granitite2001