Hmm... ok I was wondering how you can throw different objects (ice, hangars, etc..) out of a car window going about 50 to 60 mph and successfully get a hit on another car.
-Supermegablunderbitch
Blunderbitch, I admire your inquisitiveness. This is definitely a question that has been pondered throughout the ages, and your deep insight has surfaced it once again. How would one throw things out of a car window and successfully strike another car while going about 50 or 60 (assuming the two cars are traveling in opposite directions and moving at the same rate.) The question is one of simple logic and complex physics. You'd first have to do some research, and find out what the average wind speeds of the day will be. Then, when you decide to go for a drive, make sure your car is well stocked with hangers, ice cubes, or whatever other projectiles you'd wish to use. Once a target is chosen, throw your projectile out the window exactly 1.5 seconds before that target would pass. This is assuming that you're going exactly 55 mph. and there's no wind speed at all. If things are a bit gusty, you'll have to figure it out for yourself.
P.S. Taking a rational guess at who you're talking about, it would probably be more intelligent to tape some hangers to your knees and face. Then all you have to do is act like a stationary object. Your target would actually hit you.
Dear Sobriquet,
Recently I was confronted by my friend, whom I shall call "Biff", with a problem. Jame-....err...Biff...seems to think that I have an unhealthy obsession with advice columns, accusing me of not being able to solve my own damn problem. A week ago, my local newspaper was unable to fit "Dear Abbey" into the daily issue, and I attempted suicide. Do you think that Coca-Cola is better, or Pepsi?
-Thinking of a catchy alias in New York
If a one day lack of Dear Abby results in a suicide attempt, I'd suggest talking to a mental health professional. You could even come read this advice column. I'm sure that it will one day become much more popular than Dear Abby. Supposing that you truly are addicted to advice columns, ours is a good one to read. Secondly, Coca-Cola is a far more superior product than Pepsi. Coke is a wholesome beverage company concentrated on tradition and quality, while Pepsi is a media pimp trying to convince consumers that image is everything. Besides, Coke tastes better.
Madam Cleo, am I going to be a rock star one day?
-The Irreverend
Irreverend, you're barking up a tree that I never had in my yard. I'm not exactly the psychic type, but I do occasionally consult the spirits. They tell me that rock stardom is a strong possibility in your future. Should that not fan out, however, your lower torso will be surgically replaced with a hovercraft-type appendage -- much more effective in everyday locomotion.
My girlfriend hates me, are we going to break up?
-GreyZeroBlue
Sounds like a sticky situation, GreyZero. I'm inclined to belive that hate is an extremely strong emotion (which makes the hated a rather detested entity.) The fact that you're asking me this question leads me to beleive that you're a complete moron. It's probably best that your union with woman is ending. The last thing you need to be doing is reproducing.
Hey Ben, wanna play some Halo later tonight?
-Vex
I'd be much obliged, Nick. What time, and how much will you be needing in beer cash? I'm willing to put in about $10. This will, theoretically, entitle me to a case. There's nothing quite like playing Halo when you can't even say your own name.
My significant other is too emotional about everything. Is there any way to combat this?
-Cyric
This isn't an easy question to answer, Cyric. It's all a matter of how well you deal with your girlfriend's emotional hyperactivity. If you deal well with it, then you're set. From what you tell me, it seems just the opposite -- she's making you nuts. If her emotional sensitivity truly does bother you, I would suggest a heart to heart conversation. This would obviously give her a really good chance to overreact, but part of living is taking chances. Talk to your girl, and let her know how you feel. If she's serious about you and the relationship, she'll hear you out and hopefully agree to some sort of compromise. It's all about communication, my friend.
