MONSTER # 1

TELL ME WHY? The Horror begins.


Yep. This is it. This is the first fanfic the Master and I wrote. Back in the days when were the biggest X Files fans.
Yes, WE were the biggest X Files fans dammit!! We still like to spend our lonely nights sitting in THE MACHINE, waiting for Mulder and Scully to get it on. It gets lonely in here, you know. Yes, we have each other. But we're both, males...and we can't, you know. 'Cause it's wrong! wrong!...Why? Why is it wrong? I don't understan-
Hmm, anyway we're still obsessed with the show but now we have other priorities in our lifes *coughKoRncough...hmm yeah* And yes, we were and will always be shippers! *M&S forever woohoo!!! Dr. Frankestein and I-sorry, got carried away for a second*
This lil masterpiece *yeah right* was written a few years ago *when our english was even worse...Yes, that's possible...We come from a foreign country, you know* I haven't read it yet and I don't even remember writing these things with The Master...damned Ventolin*
Anyway, let's go thru it together, shall we?


Prepare yourself...
Title : Songs in the Key of S&M
Summary : Scully & Mulder sing some familiar songs...their way.
Disclaimer : We don't own them. Crazy Carter, 1013 and FOX do. Sue us if you want. We're not americans and you can't find us! ha ha ha :) :) :)

FIRST STOP :Yes, we like to call our God, Crazy Carter. Sometimes we dressed up like the guy, just for heck of it. One of us pretends to be a beautiful lil monster while the other one is our God, we dance and dance all night long, until our feet are so hurt we can't walk anymore. So we fall in THE MACHINE and we-let's continue our journey dear guests!


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"Mulder"
"Scully"
"I'm bored, Mulder. Let's do something fun"
"What do you have in mind, Scully?"
"I don't know. Let's do something we've never done before"
"Skinner's desk or mine?"
"Shut up Mulder"
Silence
Silence
"I know! Let's write a song!"
"About what Scully? Two FBI agents with no lifes?"
"Speak for yourself! I do have a life...well, maybe I don't have a life now but I did have one before the x files you know"
Silence
Silence
Silence
"I have one!
Every morning in the office
I see you, I feel you
That is how I now you
Muldoooooon..."
Silence
"What about this one :
Macho macho man
Mulder wants to be a macho man
Macho macho man..."
Silence
"Like Jingle Bells? :
Mulder's gone
Mulder's gone
He ditched me again!..."
Silence
"What about Saturday Night Fever? :
You can tell why the way he walks that he's a spooky man
An aliens' man..."
Silence
"Scully"
"Mulder"
"Like Bitch? :
I'm a small FBI agent,
I'm cool, I'm skeptic,
I'm frigid, I'm a saint
I do not feel ashamed.."
Silence
"I'm sorry Scully...I didn't mean it"
"I'm sorry too"
''It's alright"
"Let's listen to the radio"
"OK"
"And for those lonely hearts, one of Phil Collins' hits :
Can't hurry love
You just have to wait,
she said love don't comes easy..."
Mulder and Scully looked at each other...you know the rest.
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SECOND STOP : Whoa that really sucked hairy donkey balls. Wow. As you can see we don't know how to make good descriptions or create plots. All our stories follow this format so deal with it. We can't write and we don't care! It's getting too lonely in here, I mean Titanic??? Celine Dion?? Bitch? What the...

THIRD STOP : We didn't correct any spelling mistakes *like you don't know that by now* so we could all have a good laugh at our expense. We were so young when we wrote this and yes we can laugh at ourselves, it means we have a very high self steem. And that's good, right? Right? Please tell me 'cause I won't believe it until you tell me! Well, for a start it was ok, sort of. Our english hasn't improved at all as you will see later on.

LET'S READ THE NEXT ONE KIDS, AND YES IT IS A SEQUEL!!!! *don't worry, it's short. but that's not a surprise now that you've seen the first monter, huh?*