A story inspired by the MISSING Series of Photomanips
Cassandra
by
Bettie BrownSPOILERS: TSbyBS
DISCLAIMER: The Usual
RATING: PG-13, for language, a few bad words, one pretty bad one, but necessary, I swear
SEQUEL: Sequel to Pandora based on the Michka's Missing photos
WARNINGS: A very intense argument at beginning and end of story
Thanks to my beta, Brenda - Bettie
**** ***** ***** "I wouldn't fuck you, Ellison. You're too busy, fucking yourself." With that pronouncement, Blair Sandburg walked out of the bullpen and perhaps, out of James Ellison's life. Forever.
**************** Once upon a time, there was a magnificent city by the sea called Illum. A city of great wealth and power, it held the sea and world at bay with its colossal, impenetrable walls. These walls gave the inhabitants a false sense of security. They thought themselves safe from the misfortunes of the world behind their solid walls. Untouchable.
However, no matter how high, how wide, or how thickly the walls were built, they could be breeched. All it would take is time, persistence, and patience. But the people of Illum turned a blind-eye to this possibility. All save one, for she knew the truth, the end was near.
She told her father, the king, what she knew. What she had seen in the future as their ultimate fate. In her desperation to save the ones she loved, she begged her father to destroy the source of their downfall, to alter that possible outcome.
The woman's pleas went unheeded and all she had seen came to pass. The city fell because of arrogance, selfishness, and fear. Its citizens killed or enslaved. Its' riches looted, its greatness a faded memory. All for lack of trust in the gifts of a person touched by the gods.
**************** While I stand here musing about the fall of Troy and the fate of its seer, Cassandra, a tragedy of Homeric proportions enfolds in front of me. And it's all my fault.
Joel why didn't you just keep your mouth shut, or at the very least, wait to talk to Blair before showing Jim the Missing poster? Let him explain why he didn't tell anyone what happened when he disappeared when he was sixteen.
But I didn't and now I stand unnoticed by the door as Jim pushes the damning photo under Simon's nose, grinding his teeth all the while, and talks about his partners' betrayal of his trust.
"What the hell are you talking about, Ellison?" Simon bellowed, even with Jim only inches away, still fuming, he took the Missing poster Jim thrust in his face.
By small increments his expression changed from anger, to confusion, surprise, and finally concern. "And he never told you about this?"
"Not a word, in four years of what I thought was a close friendship."
"Don't start, Jim . . ."
"Simon, he was kidnapped when he was sixteen, here in Cascade. Why wouldn't he tell us?"
"Jim, keep in mind, he was the victim, not the perp. Something like that is bound the leave scars. Maybe he suppressed it."
"Yeah, right."
"You don't know that he didn't."
"That's the point. I don't know. Hell, Sandburg knows more about me than I know about myself. But I know next to nothing about him."
"And who's fault is that?"
"Hey I'm not the one who uses words to tap dance around the issues"
"No, you just use anger and sarcasm."
"I'm not the one who lied, Simon. I'm not the one."
"No one's lied here, Jim."
"I guess the word, is obfuscate."
"Not that, either. He just hasn't told us yet.
"Maybe he just doesn't trust us. Trust me."
"Maybe, he doesn't know how to bring it up. It's not exactly everyday conversation."
"It is with Sandburg. How many times has he been kidnapped since he started riding with me, Simon?"
Simon shrugged his shoulders.
"Exactly. After Lash, I was going to get you to pull his ride-along status. I was convinced that his being with me would only get him killed. Hell, Simon, it did. But Lash was the first time I realized that having him with me would bring him to the attention of too many psychos. I was so impressed by the way he handled himself with Lash, keeping him off-balance, until I could get to him. For all we know this is old hat to him."
"Are you listening to yourself, Jim? Your best friend was kidnapped when he was just a kid and you're angry with him for not telling you. God only knows the hell he must have gone through before he was found."
"That's just the point, Simon. God only knows, because I sure as hell don't."
"It must have been bad, Jim. Look at the date they took him, right before Halloween."
"I'm going to check the database. Try to find out who worked on the case."
"Don't Jim!"
"Don't what?"
"Just don't. If you want to know what happened ask, Blair. Don't yell at him. Don't accuse him. Don't treat him like a suspect. Just show him the poster, tell him how you found it, and give him the space and time to tell you in his own way. If you push him, you'll lose him, Jim. I kid you not."
"I . . . Jim began.
At that moment, Sandburg poked his head in. Poor kid, always did have monumentally bad timing.
"Sorry, Simon, I knocked but no one answered. Hey, Joel. Hey, Jim, just the man I was looking for." His large blue eyes blinking innocently at those gathered in Simon's office.
"I thought you had a hot date, Sandburg," Jim spat out, his tone inappropriately menacing.
Blair looked at each of us in turn, perhaps picking up on the bad vibes in the room. "I did, but Dara called me on my cell as I was leaving and told me she wasn't going to be able to make it. Something about unexpected out of town guests. So I came back to see if I could catch Jim and take him out to dinner. No use wasting those reservations."
"Nice to know you were thinking about me," his tone and body language belied his words. "Yeah, that's real considerate of you." Jim took a step toward Blair, their eyes locked.
"Jim . . ." There was a warning in Simon's voice as Jim took another step towards Blair.
"What, can't a guy show his gratitude towards his partner."
One step.
"One so considerate he shares everything with him."
Another step.
Without being aware or knowing why, Blair backed away from his partner.
"Did I, like, interrupt something important here?" Blair's confusion was clear.
Simon walked up and placed his hand on Jim's shoulder. "Don't do this," he warned. But Jim shook his hand away, never losing eye contact with Sandburg. The kid was obvious getting nervous.
"We're all friends here, Simon. Isn't that right, Blair?"
The kid nodded.
"There are no secrets between us, right?"
He nodded again, more slowly this time. Jim smiled then and it wasn't pretty.
The kid turned and looked straight at me. I would like to say that I warned him, told Jim to back down and hustled him out of there. But, I didn't. I didn't know what to say. I felt so guilty, that to my shame, I did nothing.
Simon just shook his head.
Squaring his shoulders, Blair returned his gaze to Jim. "If you have something to say, Jim, just come out and say it."
"Alright. If that's what you want." Jim closed the space between them and practically threw the poster in Sandburg's face. Blair flinched, but held his ground and the poster in question dropped to the floor. Sandburg hesitantly bent down to retrieve the object that had caused his partners foul mood and read it.
The shock on his face said it all. Shock, which quickly turned to anger. "Where did you get this? You have no right to go prying into my private life!"
"No right, Sandburg? I thought this was about friendship. You watch my back, I watch yours. I spill my guts about my past and you do the same. But you didn't, did you Sandburg? You know everything about me down to my ATM pass code and you tell me squat."
"That's not true!"
"How can you stand there and lie to me"
"I'm not lying, I just . . ."
"Just what, Sandburg? Forgot you were kidnapped when you were sixteen? Forgot it happened, here in Cascade? Just what?"
"It just never came up. It's not like I think about it everyday. Besides I've been busy lately. You know, with declaring myself a fraud, going to the police academy and becoming your permanent partner and all."
"No you don't. Don't make this about me."
"It's always about you, Jim. You and your lack of trust! Isn't that why you're so angry? I had a life without you and didn't tell you. When's the next betrayal?"
"You little, shit!"
"Gentleman, gentleman," Simon finally broke in. "This is still my office and I'm still your boss. Now step back and calm down before you both say something you'll regret."
"I already regret it, Simon. The day I asked you to make him my partner."
"Jim! This is not helping"
"Fuck you, Ellison!"
"Sandburg!"
"I bet you wish you could!"
"JIM!"
The moment he said it, you could see Ellison wanted to take it all back. How could he say something like that to Sandburg? The kid had been repeatedly accused of screwing Ellison since he joined Major Crimes back in his days as an observer. It had taken him years to earn the respect of other cops. After the desertion mess he was back at square one battling the rumors about how he, a self-confessed fraud, made detective straight out of the academy and partner in the Elite Major Crimes, with the cop of the year, James Ellison as a partner. The pain on that expressive face broke my heart.
"Oh God, Chief. I didn't mean it." Jim reached for him and Sandburg backed away. "I didn't mean it, Chief. I didn't mean it."
Sandburg just turned his back on us and started out the door. He paused in the archway, turned and faced us his partner , his face a cold hard mask. Unshed tears in his eyes gave a hint of his emotional turmoil.
"I don't swing that way, Ellison," he said in a voice barely above a whisper. "But if I did, I wouldn't fuck you, Ellison. You're too busy, fucking yourself." And with that pronouncement, Blair Sandburg walked out of the bullpen and perhaps out of James Ellison's life.
Forever.
How could one day go downhill so quickly?
"What part of 'let him tell you in his own time' don't you understand, Detective," Simon growled.
"I'm so sorry, Simon. I didn't mean to say all that."
"I'm not the one you should be apologizing to, Detective. That would be your partner. And let's hope he's not your ex-partner."
"What do I say to him, Simon. There's no way I can fix this."
"That's not my problem, Detective. God, Jim why couldn't you have listened to me?"
Jim collapsed on Simon's couch with his head in his hands and Simon sat down heavily in his chair. And I hovered slowly drowning in my guilt.
There were no answers.
The End
**** ***** *****
Go to sequel
HELEN
