Rurouni Kenshin was created by Watsuki Nobuhiro, all rights reserved to Shueisha JUMP, Sony, & Anime Works.
Fanfics Notes: More lyrics to FinKL's "Blue Rain". Has everyone heard the song? It's so sad! Ne, curious where I got the inspirations for Hachi & Kuma? They're those two goofy guys in the Sakura Taisen OVA oogling the Hanagumi. Heehee, I think they're funny. Please send me your comments. Maa maa, on with the fic... Douzo! Jill 11/3/00

Part 4: Feelings

I could no longer contain myself under the umbrella
I hid my trailing tears in the rain and ran into your arms

I know of your sobbings that you try to hide in the rain
I also know that they are not the raindrops
But your tears that fall on my shoulders

The rain continued into the morning, but instead of the uncontrolled currents, came a soft drizzle and haze. After changing, Yahiko opened his door and sighed. He had such a terrible time sleeping. All the strange tension made him very nervous. ‘Shit, why does everything have to go and change?! Why can’t things just go back to the way they were…’

He recalled ‘normal’ days: Kaoru teaching him, then getting angry and chasing him about. Then everyone making fun of her. Then Megumi and Sanosuke would argue. Then Kenshin would sit back and smile, not saying a word. Not saying that he wanted to marry Kaoru.

Yahiko crossed his arms. ‘Every since that happened, nothing has been the same. Yakuso!!’ He wanted to scream at someone, but his usual yelling partner – Kaoru, was nowhere in sight. She hadn’t returned since she left the dojo yesterday afternoon. Without words, that stunned face said everything. He knew that it would take longer than usual for Kaoru to get over this.

Scratching his head, he started to walk around the house, going to check if perhaps she had returned without him knowing. He stopped to see a redhead samurai diligently planted in front of her room. “Kenshin?!”

The rurouni looked worn out, his eyes red with bags, his body cold and exhausted. He had been sitting in the same spot since last night, his gaze fixated on the gate. He couldn’t sleep at all; all he was able to do was wait and hope. “Kaoru…” he sighed, not even blinking.

Yahiko grimaced. He figured this would be something Kaoru would surely do, but not Kenshin. This was so not masculine. It was actually embarrassing to him. “Kenshin, you know,” he uttered, walking over, “She probably stayed somewhere else… like Tae’s house or a hotel. You really didn’t need to…”

“Datte… sessha feels so empty.”

“Huh…?” Yahiko snapped his fingers; “You just need to get something into your system. I’ll go make some tea, okay? I mean, we both need the energy to yell at Busu when she rears her ugly head around here again!” Despite himself, he started laughing at his own joke. It was the only thing he could think of to make up for the uneasy feeling. He too wondered when, or if, Kaoru would return.

* * *
Sanosuke’s brown eyes slowly opened. His head resting on a pillow, he stared up at the ceiling, the room extra quiet. After a moment of focusing, he sat up in alarm.


The girl was gone. He climbed out of the futon and checked to see that the yukata she borrowed was folded neatly on the table, along with an empty roll of bandages and the remains of a cold tea and breakfast. She had definitely left hours ago.

“Damn…” he grumbled, opening the door slightly, looking out at the light rain.

* * *
Yahiko placed the tray of tea next to Kenshin. “Why don’t you change and fix your hair. I mean, get it together. You’re supposed to be the top swordsman in Tokyo, and here you are f--king lovesick.”

“ORO?” Kenshin fell over, lying on the floor with a silly, blushing face. “Sessha just wants to see Kaoru again…”

“Aa, but don’t you know that saying: ‘a pot won’t boil if you watch it’ … or some shit like that. Kenshin, sitting around ain’t gonna bring Kaoru to you. Don’t you know that already? I mean, we had to chase you down to Kyoto after Kaoru figured crying in bed wasn’t gonna do anything. I say, we go out there and look for her!”

“Dakara, those cops…” Kenshin uttered, “They said ‘it’s not time yet to worry’. I don’t understand but I truly believe that I have to wait for Kaoru. I should have done that in the first place, but I wanted things to keep going so I wouldn’t have to look back. Only, I’m still not used to her pace yet. There’s still so much I have to learn…”

“Eh?” Yahiko was greatly confused. “What are you talking about? What you see is what you get with Busu. It ain’t too hard to figure her out. You think too much about it.”

“Sou de gozaru?” he chuckled, “But that’s only because she's always on my mind.”

At these words, Yahiko felt unwell. He had never heard Kenshin openly speak about his feelings. He was aware that Kaoru definitely had a crush on him, or some sort of attachment, but he didn’t think that she’d ever get her way. The rurouni was just so impersonal, so closed off to those types of emotions.

‘Shit, does this mean I lost that bet I made with Sanosuke? I hope he forgot about it…’ he thought. He could picture the spiky-haired fighter snarling at him, “Pay up, Yahiko! I told ya they’d get together!” Yahiko shook his head. ‘They aren’t together… they aren’t!’ he repeated in his mind, as if trying to convince himself, ‘Everything will go back to the way they were…’

* * *
At the clinic, Megumi and Genzai were sitting together, having tea when they saw the door open. “Kaoru-chan…” Megumi gasped, very surprised to see her. She felt a need to say something. Perhaps even an apology. But what she should apologize for, she wasn’t sure about. However her chance came and went as Kaoru said a brief greeting, then followed Kuma into the room.

“Hachi? Kaoru uttered as she walked towards his bed. He was covered with bandages and looked very pale. “Kuma, what happened to him?”

“Last night we found Yashiitomo and approached him, then…”

Hachi cut in, mumbling weakly, “That bastard… I’ll get him next time…”

Kaoru cried, “You mean you tried to battle him??” Kuma nodded while Hachi struggled to sit up. “This is too much…” she muttered, clenching her fists, “Mou! I’m not going to let Yashiitomo continue to have his way!”

Hachi whispered over to Kuma, “Heh, Kaoru-chan never lets men get their way with her, eh?” His face suddenly strained with pain. “Ow… ow… ow…!!”

“Hachi-san, please don’t talk so much.” Kuma sighed, helping his friend rest his head back onto his pillow, “You’re gotta get better so we can try again…”

“No,” Kaoru replied sternly, “I don’t want you guys to fight him. This is my problem… I’ve brought this onto myself.”

“But Kaoru-chan…!” Hachi exclaimed, leaping up again despite his injuries. “We promised Sensei we’d look after you! We promised Keisuke!” The room suddenly became quiet at that name.

Kuma put his hand on her shoulder, “Yes, Keisuke-san wouldn’t give up, so we won’t either.”

Kaoru stared at the floor. “Keisuke…”

* * *
Megumi stood and looked towards the door. “Genzai-sensei, just who are those two guys Kaoru-chan is with?” she asked.

“They were students of her father’s a long time ago.” Genzai explained, pouring more tea, “I haven’t seen Hachi-kun and Kuma-kun for a while, not since they became police officers. It’s really good to see them again.”

“Yes but…” She crossed her arms and leaned against the wall, “Those injuries the tall one has… they’re unusual. There’s no way a sword blade or a knife could make wounds so thin and deep… it’s almost as if some sort of a scalpel had been used.”

Genzai nodded, gazing off towards the window, “I haven’t seen injuries like this for years…” He then broke out of the spell, “Oh, Megumi-kun, thanks for rushing over here for the emergency last night, even in that storm. I wouldn’t have been able to handle it on my own.”

Megumi smiled slightly, “Well, it is my job.” The door then opened and Kaoru came out. She nodded her head towards them and started to leave. “Matte!” Megumi went after her, “Where are you headed off to? Don’t you know everyone back at the dojo is worried…”

”Yes, that’s where I was headed until I heard about what happened to Hachi. I’m going there right now…”

“Then I’ll go with you.”

Kaoru nodded and the two walked outside, using separate umbrellas, which Megumi had provided. Megumi watched her from under her long bangs. The girl looked like she had a lot on her mind. There was so much she wanted to ask… so much to say. They had walked a few blocks before she was able to make out the words.

“So, Kaoru-chan, where did you go last night?”

“Sanosuke’s place.” she replied, without hesitation. She turned her head towards Megumi, who appeared a bit stricken by the statement. “Is something wrong?”

“Sanosuke’s apartment…?” Megumi barely could say it. The two stopped and stared at each other. “You stayed there?” Kaoru nodded slowly. “…With him!?” she blurted out.

“Megumi-san,” Kaoru replied, starting to walk again, “Let’s hurry up and get back to the dojo…”

Megumi stared at the back of her head in astonishment. ‘Why did she suddenly change the subject? And what is it she’s hiding?’ She gripped the handle of the umbrella and went to catch up, thoughts of Sanosuke filling her mind.

* * *
Back at the dojo, Yahiko was sweeping around the unkempt Kenshin, still planted on the walkway. He felt like walloping the rurouni with the broom. Kenshin had moved, hadn’t changed out of his pajamas, hadn’t ate a thing. He looked dead as a corpse. ‘Dammit, where is that Kaoru?!’

At that moment, they heard the gate open and a voice so sweet. “Tadaima!”

They both lifted their heads to see Kaoru entering, an umbrella resting on her shoulder, Megumi close behind. She stopped at that distance and stared at Kenshin; at the state he was in. Suddenly, she broke into a run towards him. He too, unable to stay away, leapt from the walkway, going to meet her.

“Kaoru!” he exclaimed, finally reaching her, arms pulling her to him, “I-I thought I’d never see you again!” Tears came from his eyes as he buried his face into her hair, “I’m so … I’m so sorry for what I did!”

“Kenshin,” She took his face into her hands, their eyes meeting, “You don’t have to apologize. I’m okay. But you… your cheeks are so cold. Have you been waiting for me this whole time?” He nodded, his hold tightening. “Oh Kenshin… gomen…” she uttered, lowering her head, “I shouldn’t have…”

He hushed her, then started placing kisses all over her face. “Aishiteru…” he whispered in between the random affections, “Aishiteru, Kaoru. Don’t ever leave me again. Promise me…”

“Kenshin…” Before she could reply, he caught hold of her mouth with his, a passionate kiss ensuing.

Yahiko watched in absolute horror. Megumi took hold of his shoulders and turned him around. “Let’s give them some space. Come on, Yahiko-kun, I’ll go make lunch.” He nodded, following her towards the house, his eyes wide, his face red.

Their lips slowly parted, breathing hard as they gasped for air. When fully recovered, Kaoru started to wipe away the tears in his violet eyes, taking into consideration the bags underneath. Kenshin watched her, wanting to kiss her again, wanting to hear her voice… wanting more of her. ‘Slow down,’ he told himself, ‘She just got back. There are still a lot of things you have clear up first. Let her go at her pace.’

“Kenshin, there’s something…” she started to say, her fingers gently stroking his cheek suddenly stopping. Her blue eyes widened as her mouth fell over. “Sanosuke…”

“Oro?” Kenshin turned his head to see his friend standing behind him, fists clenched. “Sano?” Kenshin released her and faced him, “Nan de gozaru ka?” Just then a punch came to his face. “Aaaah?!” he cried, crashing into the gate.

“Stop it!” Kaoru yelled as Sanosuke struck Kenshin’s feeble body again, “STOP IT!!”

“Just shut the f--k up and stay outta this!” he snarled, picking up the rurouni by the collar, “This is between us!” Two punches to the face followed, “This is for Megumi!!” He shoved him backwards and prepared one of his Futae Kiwani attacks, “And this is for… !!!”

Before the fist could make contact, Kaoru ran into the way, ready to take the hit. Sanosuke was able to stop the punch in time, but she was still struck by the force. She toppled over, she and Kenshin falling backwards. “KAORU!” both men exclaimed as she winced in pain. Kenshin lifted his head at the echo and turned towards Sanosuke, who was equally stunned. The fists slowly started to relax.

“I… said… stop…” she stammered, clutching her side. She closed her eyes for a moment, and then opened them, fury burning in them, “Friends shouldn’t fight over something so stupid!” she exclaimed, socking Sanosuke in the jaw.

He blinked at her, rubbing the bruise. “Jou-chan, I’m so…”

“Don’t apologize to me! It’s Kenshin who you should be saying ‘sorry’ to!”

Sanosuke looked over her shoulder at the samurai’s face. Kenshin was holding onto Kaoru from behind, as he was the one to have cushioned her fall. He had a bloody lip and a black eye. He suddenly bowed his head.

“Gomen, Sano. Sessha didn’t mean to kiss Megumi-dono. I totally understand if you’re angry. I’m sure I would have reacted the same way if the exact thing happened to me.”

Sanosuke stared at the ground. “Yeah… well… I wasn’t just mad at that… but…” He put out his hand and took hold of Kenshin’s. “We really shouldn’t fight anyways. Each other, that is. Not when there are bigger bastards to bash.”

Kenshin was confused. “Oro?”

Kaoru turned her head towards him; resting her forehead against his, “Let’s go inside… I’ll tell you…” she whispered. “…everything.”

From the house, Megumi had been watching the scene. She turned away, clutching the apron she was wearing. An uneasy feeling coming over her.

If I can just be in your arms
and cry all I want...

Back to Part 3
Onto Part 5