God saw she was getting tired,
and a cure was not to be,
So He put his arms around her,
and whispered, "Come with me."
With tearful eyes He watched her suffer
and saw her fade away.
Although we loved her dearly,
We could not make her stay.
A golden heart stopped beating,
hard working hands to rest.
God broke our hearts to prove to us
He only takes the best.
God knows you had to leave us,
But you did not go alone~~
For part of us went with you,
The day He took you home.
To some you are forgotten,
To others just the past.
But to us who loved and lost you,
Your memory will always last.
On December 7, 1989 I took my daughter Angela to the doctor because of severe pain in her rib area. It had been hurting her for several weeks, but we didn't think too much of it. X-rays were taken and we were immediately sent to the hospital for a cat scan. There we learned what we found out is a parents' nightmare. Our precious daughter had cancer!! She was only 10 years old. This was not supposed to happen. The next few weeks were a mad whirlwind. Angela had immediate surgery to perform a biopsy, which was needed to decide on her course of treatment. She was diagnosed with Ewing Sarcoma, a solid tumor growing off her rib.
Over the next four months she was given aggressive chemotherapy drugs. She had beautiful long, brown, curly hair and she lost it all due to the drugs. She took to wearing hats. She collected different ones. When she got sick from chemo, she liked me to stand by her and rub her bald head.
She had to endure many pokes (by needles) and getting very sick. Angie did not tolerate getting pokes. We had to hold her down and she was a screamer. She had various surgeries to insert central lines, they kept collapsing due to the drugs. She went through six weeks of radiation. By June, her tumor had shrunk enough that the doctors were able to remove it along with two ribs. Things looked good for a while but due to infections she wasn't able to finish her chemotherapy.
She was feeling pretty good and she finished the fourth grade with her friends. We went camping with her and did a few other things with our other two girls. In September at a routine checkup, some large lumps were found on her neck. Through further tests and surgeries, we found out the cancer had spread to her throat and bones. Angela and our family were flown to Los Angeles to go to Disneyland. It was sponsored by Make-a-Wish Foundation. She had a good time there. She even celebrated her 11th birthday there.
Most of the time she was brave, but she had her moments when she was depressed about what was happening to her. Boy, did she voice her opinions sometimes about what was being done to her.
The next three months were spent trying other chemo drugs, even some experimental ones. None of them worked, the cancer spread to her lymph nodes. At that point we were told that there was nothing else left to try. We had used everything available but nothing was working. The doctor said she might last until January. All we could do was try to make her happy and be comfortable.
In November we took her home. During the last year, she spent more time in the hospital than at home. Only a few days would go by before she had to go back. When she was home for more than a week this time, Angela asked me when she was going back to the hospital for more treatment. I had to tell Angie that there would be no more hospitals or treatments. She looked at me and said, "Without anymore treatments, I'm going to die." I had to tell her this was true. She asked me if I was going to cry everyday for her and I told her I would for the rest of my life. We just held each other for a few minutes and cried together.
I thought my heart was breaking during this year of treatment knowing the chances weren't good, but that moment is when my heart shattered. Within a few weeks, she slipped into a coma. Once in a while she would come out of it and talk to us. I spent every minute by her side. You could see her slipping away as her organs started to shut down. I was the only one with her when she took her final breath. On December 9, 1990, she truly became an "ANGEL" to me. She will live on in my heart and memories.
Mommy loves you and misses you, Angela.
Angela's Resting Place
Angela now has a nephew in Heaven
A Birthday Gift
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