Testimony to the Duvall Church

January 23, 2005

A year and a half ago, if you had told me I would be pursuing the adoption of a child, and even going to other side of the planet to do it, I would have begged you then to just shoot me. I was not in a place in life where adoption would make sense or appear to be prudent. I was late 40-something, and I already had 3 kids. I was older and was considering a future after the kids left home and my time and life would be mine again.

I was done.

Adoption was fine for someone else, but I was not open to doing it myself. At Paula’s request I agreed to go to an information night at a local adoption agency. Now I knew this was dangerous, just like when Paula dragged me to a dog kennel and said she was “just going to look at the puppies”. On the way home from the agency we stopped at our favorite Chinese Restaurant. God has a sense of humor. Paula’s fortune cookie held the message “You will have success in whatever you adopt”. I knew I was in trouble. I began to consider all that another child would mean. Do you know how long it takes to get a table for 6 at Ixtapa? (a local restaurant) What will it be like to leave from a High School Graduation and go straight to the Social Security office to apply?

As I began to tell people that we were considering adoption I found that about 95% of them had only one reaction. Without even suggesting that they should consider it, they would immediately get defensive and say “I’ve raised mine. I’m done.” The shocking thing was that it was the same reaction in both Christians and non-Christians alike. It was then that I realized that something was wrong.

Romans 12:1-2

Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God–this is your reasonable act of worship. Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is – his good, pleasing and perfect will.

God calls Christians out from the world and to stand apart from it. So if God tells us in James that we are to care for widows and orphans, but our reaction to the idea of adoption is the same as the world’s, we have a serious problem.

As I considered our family, and all that God had blessed us with, He showed me that there was room in our home for a child that didn’t have one.

You see, my pretense of male protectionism with “I need to be prudent with our finances” and “I need to look to the safety and security of my family” was really nothing more than selfishness. I was looking for the safe, secure and comfortable life that our economy and culture can provide.

I now believe that we Christians have bought in to what we think we have avoided. We reap the benefits of our culture and enjoy God’s blessings. Then we commit the offense of hoarding it, and even starting to think that we are entitled to it. There is nothing wrong with working hard, but we have become far too comfortable in our cushy western lifestyles.

Our problem is further complicated by the ease with which we can simply write a check and feel that we have done our part. We are seldom, if ever, stretched beyond our comfort zones. Giving monetarily is important, but the obedience that God expects doesn’t begin and end with our bank accounts.

I now understand that “care for” means more than simply making a donation and calling it good. God’s never promises an easy, comfortable life as a Christian. “care for” means that you are going to go out of your way, make yourself uncomfortable, and perhaps even sacrifice until it hurts for someone who needs your help. The faith that God wants makes itself visible in ACTION.

We look into the future and find security in what we can see and what we have control over. But true faith depends and what we can’t see and trusts God for the future.

Many years ago I lost the job I held for 5 years. I spent nearly a year unemployed. But in all that time we never missed a meal, and we never had an unpaid bill. Several years before Paula and I made the decision to start tithing, and trusting in God’s provision. We kept our commitment, even with the unemployment checks, and God has always been faithful. (And as a side note, learn from our experience. If you are not tithing, get started now. Believe me, you cannot afford NOT to!)

What I would like you to understand is that God has proven to me time and again that I can trust him to provide for my family. So I threw away the idea of worrying about the costs of adoption and what it would take to raise child #4, because if it was what God was asking me to do, it was up to Him to provide the finances. Trusting Him also allowed me to proceed because I knew that if we were not really called to adopt, He would close the door. I have learned that stepping out in faith is a wonderful adventure and a great opportunity to watch God work.

If we get down into the very basics of what God asks of believers, it is two things. First, that we are open to the leading of the Holy Spirit, and second, that we are obedient. The future is in God’s hands, and he promises, that if we are obedient, He will bless us, and bless us far beyond what we can think or even imagine. I challenge anyone to take just one look at Lily, and deny the blessings our family has in her. And it's only been seven weeks!

I know that not everyone is called to adopt. But I do believe that there are millions of Christian families that could, but for the sake of security and comfort they are not heeding the call. I know, because two years ago I was doing it myself. Picture what the world could be like a few generations now and the legacy we would leave. Think of the witness for Christ when the world sees that we don’t just talk about our faith, we put our faith where our mouths are. This is world missions, folks. The Great Commission doesn’t begin at the borders of a foreign county. The greatest mission potential of all is the one that exists under our own roofs. We need to bear in mind that it’s not really our house, it’s God’s!

So I am asking you all to consider the joy of adoption. Earnestly look at all that God has blessed you with, and take some quiet moments and ask yourself if there isn't a place in your home and your heart for a little child of God. There are millions of kids out there. Chances are excellent there is at least one waiting for you. Please don't turn your back or brush this aside. There are little lives out there that need us, and God is patiently waiting for our answer.

Are you older and not fond of doing the infant thing? No problem! There are far more older children out there than infants. Don’t want to travel into the 3rd world? No problem! There are plenty of kids right here in the US. God has a lot more children than we have excuses.


I would like to close with an excerpt from the final entry of our journal from our trip to Thailand.

It has been an amazing 2 weeks. We have been to the far side of the world and back. We have heeded and obeyed God's call and are already reaping blessings for it.

The road we traveled to reach this point has been long and fraught with highs and lows of emotion. The future is going to be filled with, heartache, sorrow, excitement and joy, but I am confident that 20 years from now Paula and I will be looking back and saying that it was all worth it, and would we do it all again in heartbeat. I can't wait to see what the future holds for Lily and our entire family.