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If oversleeping is a crime then I’m Guilty,

If oversleeping is a crime then I’m Guilty.

I get up at P.M. 3,

and it doesn’t bother me,

but Sleeping is always free still I’m Guilty.

 

If taking the last meatball is a crime then I’m guilty,

If taking the last meatball is a crime then I’m guilty.

Instead of giving it to my wife,

I’d eat it with my knife,

devour it to save my life still I’m guilty.

 

If watching T.V. is a crime then I’m guilty,

If watching T.V. is a crime then I’m guilty.

I surf the channels from morning till 8,

That T.V. dinner sure is great.

I watch the reruns that I hate still I’m guilty.

 

If eating junk food is a crime then I’m guilty,

If eating junk food is a crime then I’m guilty.

Candy and chocolate all the time,

Some more cake would be just fine,

If taking ant acid is a crime then I’m guilty.