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The "Superhero" Poem

when I grow up I'm going to be president
start wars with a twitch of my fingers
attend extravagant balls with thousand dollar gift baskets
be invited to premieres and opening nights
and sleep in a huge four-poster bed once shared by Clinton and... somebody.
I'd go to foreign countries with weird good
and shakes hands with gross old politicians
who slime, "Good evening madam president."
and I'd have to host that goddamn Easter Egg hunt on the lawn
and take photographs with squirming kids...
maybe I don't want to be president

when I grow up I'm going to be a superhero
I will be invisible and invincible
and I will FLY
my costume will be red converse high-tops
and a neon green leotard
my theme song would be:
Here I come to save the day!
or maybe without words at all:
daan da da DAAN, daan da daa...
but every single time someone lost their keys
or were being held hostage by an evil supervillain
they'd call me out of bed to come save them
probably at fricking three AM

when I grow up I'm going to be French.
one of those chic Parisian girls
with that certain je nai sais quois
and trendy European shoes
I'll sip coffee and eat those cute little pastries
at a cafe by the Seine
and I'll date an artist named Jacques
we'll hang out with our artsy friends
who don't shower
or shave their body hair
and get so drunk every night they start calling Jacques "Monique" and chasing him with paintbrushes...
I don't even know how to speak French!

when you grow up, you'll be mothers and fathers,
rodeo clowns and Chuck E. Cheese counterstaff
you'll starve and you'll be wealthy
but me...?
well, don't you worry about me
I'm not going to grow up at all.

9 July 2001