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Frieza Interviews Oolong

Frieza: Hello all!

Crowd: Hello Frieza!

Frieza: **looks around** Ok good. Looks like no one is going to mess up my show today. Perfected. Anyway my first guest today….

Woman 1: **runs up to Frieza and hugs him tight** I LOVE YOU FRIEZA! I’M NEVER GOING TO LET YOU GO!

Frieza: ACK!!! I …. need …… some air….ahhhh.

Woman 1: What? You don’t need air silly.

Frieza: Guards….!

Woman 1: Sorry but the guards are taking a nap. Thanks to my sleeping pills of course. YOUR ALL MINE!

Frieza: NO!!!! **Breaks free and throws her up in the air**

Woman 1: I STILL LOVE YOOOOOOOOOOOOU…….

Frieza: Blah! Those kind of people need to get a hobby or something. Anyway my guest for today is the richest man….er pig in the world. He made a ton of money off the stock market. Here he is Oolong!

Oolong: **Dressed up very nice and has two women holding onto him ** Hello Frieza. It’s nice to be here today.

Frieza: Oh great another pimp. When did you turn to a pimp?

Oolong: I have no clue what you are talking about. I would never become something that foul

Frieza: Then what is up with the ladies?

Oolong: Where there is money there are women.

Frieza: Ahhh. Anyway my first question. Are you scared?

Oolong: Huh? I am sorry I don’t understand the question.

Frieza: It’s easy. Look at the crowd. Almost everyone in the crowd is a butcher or a farmer.

Oolong: **Sweat Drop** Hehehehe…I’m ok. I know those people won’t hurt me now.
Farmer 1: Here piggy, piggy, piggy.

Oolong: Oh no…uh Frieza can we please start the interview.

Frieza: Yea yea yea sure. Ok first question. Now that you are the richest pig in the world what do you do for fun?

Oolong: Oh I stay mostly in my house. I sometimes go outside to run. What I REALLY do for fun is…

Butcher: Make some pork chops?

Oolong: NO! I go out and ride horses. I always like to ride another animal.

Frieza: Ok that did not sound right. Anyway now your rich and all do you still hang out with your old friends?

Oolong: I do not! Those people have been bringing me down ever since I teamed up with them. All the time with corny jokes about me being a pig. WELL WHO’S LAUGHING NOW!

Frieza: Chill out porky. You don’t want to have a heart attack now.

Farmer and Butcher: We wouldn’t mind him having a heart attack.

Oolong: You do know I could buy and sell you both a thousand times over right?

Farmer and Butcher: **lower there heads** Yes……

Frieza: Ok next question. Can I borrow 20 bucks?

Oolong: Excuse me?

Frieza: Your excused but I need to borrow 20 bucks cause I lost to a bet. I thought the farmers and butchers would have killed you by now.

Oolong: WHAT! I will not give you that money. How dare you bet on someone’s life!

Frieza: Come on Porky. Don’t make me turn you into some pork chops and sell you!

Oolong: THAT’S IT! I CAN’T TAKE IT ANYMORE! **rips his cloths off and gets on all fours** I CAN’T HANDLE PEOPLE CALLING ME PORKY ANYMORE! I WILL BUY THIS SHOW AND TURN IT INTO A STUPID FISHING SHOW! Ahahaahahahahaha oink, oink, oink.

Frieza: Die Porky! **kicks Oolong in the middle of the Butcher and Farmer**

Farmer: I’m going to make this piggy REAL fat.

Butcher: And I’m going to make this piggy REAL yummy.

Oolong: Oink, oink, oink!

(The Farmer and Butcher leave the show with Oolong in there hands)

Frieza: Well, looks like that’s the end of the show. Good night all.