Where is Love?
You want me to talk about my love life? Well, I haven't really had one, not unless you count the boys I held hands with in the first couple of years of Primary School; Or the lad I 'went out' with when I was ten. Talk about a crash course in emotion! Being so young I thought it was going to last forever. Me and Paul, married, with loads of kids. Then Nikki White told me that Paul was going out with her, and that he loved her more than me. I still don't know to this day whether it was true or whether she was just being a vicious Bitch. But it broke my heart. I went to see my Grandma, and when I found she wasn't in I sat on the front door step and cried.
I didn't have any relationships at Secondary School. Although in the last couple of years other girls seemed to think that this meant I could solve their problems, having no bias for or against boys. Then I went to college, still no relationships through the two years. I liked, or thought I liked, some people. But it was always the same story. I was alright as a friend, but as anything else? Forget it!
It's still the same. I really like him. I suppose people would say it's a crush. But it's something more than that. I've never felt this way about anyone. Same old story applies though. Okay as a friend, anything more, no way. I know nothing will come of it. But my heart just won't let go. And people can be so tactless, encouraging other girls to go for him with me sitting there in full earshot. I know I should try to forget him. But I've got this horrible feeling that it's not going to happen. I'll probably be single all my life. I've never really known anything else. Eight, nearly nine years without a boyfriend is a long time. So what's my love life like? Non Existant!