Fanfiction

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CHAPTER 6

Life isn't always fair to gentlemen

Extending an arm in front of her, the young warden pushed the seemingly endless piles of papers and files cluttering her desk to the side and sighed tiredly. Resting her weight on her elbows, Buffy massaged her sore temples and closed her eyes, willing the headache to go away, without much success.

Giles poked his head through the open door of her office. The security headquarters, where his own office was located, was a little further down the hall. In the week she had been working there, he made a habit of stopping by to chat once in a while, when her office door was open and he had a minute to himself.

He cleared his throat to get her attention. "I got you some coffee. You look like you might need it. You've had your head buried in those documents all morning."

"My hero! You are, by far, my favorite person in the world right now. Thank you so much." She gestured for him to have a seat while taking the paper cup from him.

"No need to thank me Buffy. I just noticed that you've been working at your desk since you arrived this morning and thought you might need a break. And after working around her for a few years now, I realize Harmony does have a tendency to be forgetful about these things. It's not that she doesn't try, it's just that--If you ask her for a coffee, you will be lucky to get it sometime during the next week."

Buffy laughed at this. "Yes, but I think I'll keep her anyway. Despite her lack of decorum, she seems to be a sweet girl and she's not doing such a bad job. She can be annoying sometimes, but nothing I can't deal with. I guess as long as I accept the fact that I'll have to get my own coffee, we'll be fine. Thanks for checking on me though, I appreciate it. You have no idea how much my brain cells needed a break right now. I swear, I'm looking at you, and I can still see legal documents dancing in front of my eyes."

Giles glanced at the piles of files on Buffy's desk. "Am I wrong in assuming that your predecessor left you with a tremendous amount of unfinished projects to sort through?"

"You're right on. The son of a... " Buffy caught herself, and gave Giles an innocent smile. "I mean, Mr. Wilkins left a gigantic mess behind. I'm sure he's roasting on some Mexican beach, a playboy model rubbing sun tan lotion on his back, and he's laughing at me right now." Buffy frowned, suddenly unsure. "He IS the corrupted one you were talking about, right? Or is he the one who killed himself? In which case, he's probably roasting in hell for this." She pointed at the work scattered all over her desk.

"Corrupted one." Giles confirmed with a smile. "He stole a great deal of money from the prison. But... you're probably already aware of that."

The blonde woman snorted and rolled her eyes. "Yeah, I got that memo. Is there anything he didn't do? The guy was way evil."

"I'm afraid he was, yes."

Buffy stretched in her chair, rolling her neck and pulling her arms above her head. She made a face at the soreness in her tired limbs.

"You know Giles, I've been sitting here for hours and my butt is kinda numb. What about doing that inspection of the facilities I've been putting off for a week? Are you up to it?"

"Of course. We could do it now if you wish."

"Yes, I think I need a change of scenery before I go insane."

Buffy got up, grabbed her jacket from the back of her leather chair. She fumbled for a moment, trying to find her clipboard and a pen that worked, then she followed Giles out of the office.

When they walked pass Harmony's desk, the perky blonde secretary stopped them.

"Oh boss? Ms. Osborne called."

Buffy frowned in confusion. "Who?"

Harmony rolled her eyes at her. "Hello! The criminologist? She works here? Anyway, she said she'll come back from her vacation a day early to have a chance to meet with you."

Buffy took a deep breath not to snap at the girl. "And that'd be when exactly Harmony?"

"Well duh, Friday."

"Fine. Block some time on my schedule would you?"

"On it!" Harmony carefully wrote it down on her pad, then smiled at Buffy, obviously pleased with herself.

Buffy just shook her head and followed Giles down the corridor.

"This girl amazes me. It's like we speak two different languages."

"Don't worry too much about it. Took me at least two years to get what the bloody hell that girl was talking about. You'll get the hang of it... eventually."

"Yeah, I won't keep my hopes up. I might have to hire a translator eventually or I risk a permanent headache."

They passed the metal detectors, then a few bulletproof glass doors and into the secure area. Two other guards accompanied them in case of trouble.

That's how started what seemed like days of walking, listening to Giles pointing out the things he had been wanting to bring to her attention and taking notes on her clipboard. This wasn't getting rid of her headache at all, but at least they were moving. She had desperately needed to ease the cramps in her legs caused by the long hours sitting behind her desk. Immobility wasn't one of Buffy Summers' favorite things. She was more of an action girl. Always had been.

But stepping into the workout area, Buffy's need for action was about to be fulfilled dramatically.

"The camera in this corner, in my humble opinion, isn't in the right angle. It should be moved or another one should be added so we can get a better coverage... "

Giles was suddenly interrupted by loud shouting coming from the other end of the room, followed by the sound of people fighting. Automatically, the two security guards who had been following them quietly during the tour of the facilities sprang into action. They rushed to where a convict was just about to hit another with a 50 pound dumbbell, while the other cons cheered him on and started fighting amongst themselves. The security guard on duty in the workout area ran to help them. Some of the prisoners decided to take advantage of the disruption to rush the exit but Giles saw it and made them back up. He wasn't paying attention to Buffy anymore.

Engrossed in what was happening, and yelling orders in her two way radio, Buffy wasn't paying attention either. She didn't notice the con coming at her from behind until it was too late. She turned, just in time to have his meaty fist smashed into her stomach. She lost her wind long enough for him to throw her out of his way, and headfirst into the nearest wall.

Buffy blinked several times, trying to fight the darkness that threatened to swallow her. A face came into focus in her sight and she could hear his voice calling to her. It sounded very far away.

"Buffy... Ms. Summers! Are you alright? Don't close your eyes luv, stay with me."

It was Spike. She wanted to answer him, but then he was gone, and everything went black.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"I'm alright... I'm fine... not closing my eyes, just resting them..." Buffy mumbled, slowly coming to.

She opened her eyes carefully. She blinked at the sudden harshness of the overhead light and looked around, surprised that Spike wasn't there anymore. In his place was a girl that she remembered for being... What was her name again? Annie? Hanna? She looked around herself, trying to figure out where she was. She wasn't in the workout area anymore. It looked like the infirmary.

**How the hell did I get here so fast? I just closed my eyes for like two seconds. Did someone finally figure out the secret to teleportation?**

Thinking hurt her head and she groaned before closing her eyes again.

"Don't close your eyes and pretend that you're still unconscious. I heard you groan."

Buffy opened her eyes again and this time, the nurse's face was mere inches from her own, making her jump.

"You're gonna have a very unappealing bump on your head. But except for that, you're perfectly fine and physically able to go on with your normal activities without worrying. Maybe you shouldn't drive your car though. You'd probably end up killing someone. But hey, on the brighter side," she added with a bright smile, "orgasms don't require concentration. So you can have them without risk."

Buffy stared at the girl with her mouth open. Now she remembered what the girl's name was. "... Anya, right?"

"Yes." Anya smiled at her, obviously pleased that her employer remembered her name. "We met the day of your speech, but we haven't had a chance to talk since."

Buffy gave her a tight smile. **Oh joy, the girl was already making my head hurt when I was perfectly healthy. Now, she's gonna kill me for sure.**

"Spike... " Buffy started asking. "What happened to him?"

"Oh, don't worry. He's being taken care of. I'll go and ask someone to drive you home. You look awful." The brunette turned around without waiting for an answer, and left the room.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The punch hit him square in the jaw and Spike fell on his knees, spitting out blood. He had already received a few solid ones to the ribs and by the pain radiating throughout his torso, he could tell they'd probably broken one or two.

"No bloody fair to hit a man who can't defend himself you wankers." He hissed through clenched teeth.

He had been dragged more roughly than usual towards isolation, but they really lashed out at him when he had asked if the warden was all right. He didn't know exactly why but wasn't going to ask either.

One of the guards grabbed the back of his shirt and unceremoniously threw Spike headfirst in the isolation cell.

"You can expect to rot in here for a lifetime or two, Spike. And after what you did, we might even forget about your sorry ass. Nobody would miss you. "

The other guard laughed.

Spike didn't bother to answer. He wiped the blood from his face and sat back against the wall of the cell. He could be honest with himself and admit that he was usually actively looking for trouble. But for once, he didn't think he did anything to deserve this treatment. He had only tried to protect the young woman from the ongoing fight.

**Right. Like fairness has any part to play in my bloody soddin life anyway** He thought somberly.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The cab dropped Buffy off in front of her house, and the driver helped her reach the front door.

"You sure you alright miss? You look like a ghost."

"I'll be just fine sir, don't worry. I'm tougher than I look. Thanks for your help."

Buffy's smile faded as soon as the cab driver turned to walk away. She felt like shit. It felt like her head was double its normal size.

She made her way to her bedroom and let herself sink into her plush bed. She was starting to think that she might take Giles' advice after all, and take a few days off.

**I'll have to make sure to thank Spike when I get back to work** She thought drowsily before drifting off to sleep.

A/N: When I wrote this, I didn't even know about Euro Trip. I swear! It's just coincidence. But I saw the movie last week, and it was freakin' awesome. I strongly recommend it ;-)

Chapter 7

French lessons

Monday morning, Buffy decided that she was rested enough to go back to work. She had spent Thursday, Friday and the weekend home, wrapped in her afghan and watching movies. Now her head was feeling much better, and she was bored to tears. She knew that one more day off and she'd never be able to catch up on her work at the prison. She was so eager to get back that she made it to her office before the night staff had been relieved. That's where Giles found her, so engrossed in what she was doing that she didn't even hear him knock.

"Buffy? What a surprise! I thought for sure you'd be gone for another few days. How are you feeling?"

Buffy smiled up at him, and leaned back in her chair. "I was doing much better until I realized just how much of a set back this whole ordeal has been. I'm behind on everything I had to do. I'm gonna have to put in a lot of extra hours this week if I want to catch up."

The young woman got up and went to the brand new coffee maker she had installed in a corner of her office. She poured two cups.

"A coffee maker?" Giles chuckled from where he was standing in the doorway.

"Well yeah. It was the only logical solution to my problem. Harmony won't get me coffee, and I'm too lazy to walk all the way to the staff lunchroom and get it myself. So I went to Wallmart yesterday and got my very own coffee machine. This way everyone's happy."

Buffy turned around and rolled her eyes dramatically when she noticed that Giles was being his usual British self. He was staying politely by the door, waiting to be invited in. She chuckled and shook her head. "Come on Giles, don't just stand there. Have a seat."

As he walked in and sat down in front of her, she handed him a cup of coffee. He gave her a grateful smile.

"You know, you don't have to be so polite and proper with me. We've only known each other for a little more than a week, but I consider you a friend already. Or at least," She added, suddenly unsure, "I was hoping we could be friends--eventually."

"Of course, Buffy. I do like you very much." He said warmly. "I just wasn't sure where I stood with you and didn't want to be overly familiar. But if you don't mind the familiarity..."

"I don't mind at all Giles. I told you, as long as we're not around prisoners, there's no 'rank' between us, all right?"

"As you wish, Buffy. So..." He hesitated, obviously fighting his instinct for formality. "Huh--How was your weekend?"

Buffy almost laughed at how flustered he looked, but she managed to keep a straight face. After all, he was making an effort.

"I almost turned into a vegetable. At one point, I thought I would start growing roots. I spent the weekend on the couch. Nothing very exciting. But I guess I needed that. It had been a long time since I'd had time to pamper myself like that. You probably noticed already, I'm kind of a workaholic. It's always all work and no play for Buffy. I rarely take time for myself like I did this weekend."

"Yes, I did notice. I can already tell that you'll be doing a fantastic job here. I've been working in this prison for over twenty years and of all the wardens I've dealt with, you're the first one who seems to love the job. Though putting your work before your own happiness cannot be healthy. Surely you have other activities? Friends, family, love interest?"

This time, Buffy laughed out loud. "If that's the way you feel, I guess I'll wait before asking you how things have been here since I left."

She grinned playfully at him and he shook his head slightly.

"To answer your question, no, I don't have that many people in my life. My mom lives in San Francisco where she owns an art gallery. We call each other once in a while, but she's busy. My father has been MIA for years now. He's probably on a yacht somewhere in Greece with his barely legal mistress. And I have a younger sister, Dawn, who's a student at UCLA. She's the smart one in the family. She's been in Paris perfecting her French for the past four months. She came back three weeks ago but I hadn't had a chance to see her yet."

"What about friends?"

"The only close friends I have are Cordelia and Xander. We were always together in high school but now that we're grown ups and living in different cities, it's getting harder to see each other. They got married when we finished school and have a little girl, Camille." She paused, pretending to be thinking hard about this. "Yup. That would sum up my very pathetic social life. As far as love is concerned--I gave up on that a while ago. I have the worst taste in men and it always ends badly. I'm much better off single. Less drama."

"Nonsense. You are a beautiful, bright, young woman. You can't possibly tell me that you gave up on love already because of a few bad experiences. There's no point in living without love. You just haven't found the one yet. Give it some time."

"I don't know. I've never really been in love before. I've had a couple of innocent crushes when I was in high school, but it wasn't love. And usually, the guys I dated were jerks or just plain weird. But what about you, Giles? Did you find the one?"

Giles cleared his throat uncomfortably. He was obviously not used to talking about himself so openly. "Well, huh.. I don't know if... she's the one or not, but I have been seeing Anya, the new nurse. She's special. Strangely enough, I like her bluntness. It takes getting used to at first, but you never have to guess with her. It's... refreshing."

The blonde girl just stared at him, mouth gapping. "Anya? No way! That's... great! Wow, you guys are so--different."

Giles took off his glasses and started cleaning them. "I understand your surprise. We are indeed quite different. But you know what they say: opposites attract. I've never really believed that old saying before, but I'm starting to think maybe it is true after all. Perhaps I could introduce her to the delicate art of tact, and in return, she could help me loosen up a bit." Giles said with a mischievous glint in his blue eyes.

Buffy chuckled.

Giles looked at his watch and got up. "I really should get going. I have quite a lot of work to do today and I'm sure you do too."

"All right. It was nice to finally have a chance to talk. The rest of the staff isn't very friendly. Half of them still look at me like I'm some kind of a joke, and the other half just ignore me."

"They'll come around, Buffy. Just give them some time."

"Yeah, I know." She sighed. "But it's just depressing. Alright, enough self pity. I'll see you later."

Giles turned to leave, but remembering that she had planned on meeting with Spike later on, she stopped him. "I almost forgot--could you..."

Buffy interrupted herself when Harmony walked in. She gave her secretary a questioning look.

"Here you go." The bubbly blonde gave her boss her brightest smile while dropping on her desk a mountain of documents. The top of the pile was decorated with what looked like a field of yellow post-its. Harmony's trademark.

"What are those, Harm?"

"Urgent stuff that accumulated while you were on your unplanned vacation."

"I wasn't on vac--never mind. And what are the post-its for exactly?"

"Things scheduled for today and other things that need attending to. Like the showers have started acting funky this weekend and the guys are getting majorly pissed off. Cold water is supposed to make your hair shinier. They should be happy, but they're not. Go figure. You also have a meeting with the caterers at 11am about that food poisoning last week. But--It's all there on the little post-its, and in order of priority. I'm sure you can read it yourself."

The more Harmony talked, the more Buffy's shoulders slouched.

"Thank you. That was very considerate of you." She said in a barely concealed mocking tone that Harmony missed completely.

"No problem boss." She walked out, forgetting to shut the door behind her as usual.

Buffy sighed deeply in front of the workload that awaited her. She finally noticed Giles still standing expectantly by the door. She gave him a puzzled look.

"You were saying something before Harmony walked in." He reminded her.

"Oh. Yeah. But you know what, forget about it. I won't have time today. It's something I can do tomorrow. If I'm still alive."

"I will let you get to work then."

He closed the door after him, and Buffy took the first post-it, needing to start somewhere. It said:

Contact maintenance for shower repair to avoid riot

It was written in pink, and the "i" in "riot" had a little heart shaped dot on it.

Buffy rolled her eyes dramatically. This was gonna be a long day.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Buffy grinned happily when her house came into view and she saw who was waiting for her. She turned the steering wheel sharply to engage her little sports car in the driveway. Anybody who would have witnessed the maneuver would have gasped in fear when the red car stopped no more than half an inch from the garage door, but not the dark haired girl who was sprawled comfortably on the front porch stairs. She had seen much worse displays of Buffy's horrible driving in her lifetime. Which was the reason why she would never set foot in a car with her, even if Orlando Bloom himself asked her to. The young girl had her pretty face upturned to enjoy the warm sun, long chocolate brown hair and expensive sunglasses shining in the late afternoon light. Buffy slammed her car door and walked towards her. As she approached, the girl finally jumped up to her feet.

"Dawn!" Buffy exclaimed happily. "Oh my God, I've missed you so much!" She hugged the taller girl fiercely.

"Moi aussi! Je me suis ennuyee de toi comme tu ne peux pas savoir. Comment va ma soeur prefere?"

"Huh?"

The look on Buffy's face was priceless and Dawn couldn't help but laugh.

"I said: Me too. I can't tell you how much I've missed you. How's my favorite sister doing?"

Buffy pouted. "Yeah, yeah. Go ahead," She said while unlocking the front door. "brag. Make fun of your poor sister. One summer in France and you come back fluent? How fair is that? I know you're supposed to be the brain of the family, but seriously..."

"Oh come on, you're just jealous." She said, walking past Buffy and into the house. "Is it my fault if I took three years of French in high school and actually showed up for class? Which is more than you can say. When you finished high school, all you could manage was 'Je ne parle pas francais'"

"Did I say I was glad to see you? I must have lost my mind there for a second." The grin on her face denied her words. She missed bickering with her younger sibling. They had spoken on the phone once in a while when she was overseas, but it wasn't the same.

Dawn dropped her backpack by the door and looked around, a glimmer of curiosity lighting up her blue eyes.

"Do I get the grand tour of 'Casa del Summers'? I'm the only one who hasn't seen your new house yet."

Buffy put her arm around her sister's slender shoulders. "And who's fault would that be for coming back the day before college started?"

Dawn pretended to analyze the question carefully. "Louis-Philipe's fault actually. But he was well worth it. He had eyes like the Mediterranean Sea. Too bad he was married with two kids my age. Le salaud." She blurted out with a straight face.

"What?!"

She giggled, happy with herself for getting the reaction wanted.

"Relax. He was 20, single, free of any offspring, and now has a broken heart thanks to me."

"Shame on you, you man eater."

"Yep. Man eater, that's me."

"Come on. I'll give you the tour, then you'll tell me all about your exciting adventures in the country of cheese and bread."

"Deal."

Buffy led her sister from one room to another, showing her the painting studio, the two guestrooms, master bedroom, living room...

"Considering the lack of tacky New Kids on the Block posters, am I right to assume Cordelia had something to do with the decoration?"

Buffy pouted. "You're wrong! We did it together--as a team."

Dawn gave her a stern look, clearly not believing her.

"Ok. Fine. She welcomed my suggestions--kinda." She admitted sheepishly.

Dawn loved the house, but what really got her to squeal excitedly was the playroom in the basement, with its entertainment system, pool table and bar, and the backyard.

"Can you imagine the incredible pool parties we could have here! I'll be the most popular freshman in the history of UCLA!!"

"Whoa. Hold your horses young lady. There will be no frat parties here for as long as I breathe. Got it?"

"I could invite my very hot, young, Italian teacher." Dawn gave her sister her most dazzling smile, batting her eyelashes innocently.

"Does he speak English?"

They burst out laughing.

Buffy went to the fridge. "Want something to drink, Frenchie?"

"You have ice tea?"

"Yup."

"With ice. Lots of ice. Pretty please."

Buffy poured two glasses of ice tea and came to sit in front of Dawn at the table by the pool. The sun had set, but the night was warm and comfortable.

"What brings you here on a week night? Don't you have school?"

"Nope. It's a study week. Which brings me to ask if maybe you'd let me stay here for a couple of days? After only three weeks, I already need a break from all the 'fun' of the dorm life. I'd go to San Francisco, but you know mom. She'll make me work at the gallery and keep me busy unpacking old dusty stuff. I'll never have a minute to relax..." Dawn corrected herself quickly. "I mean study. Of course."

Buffy snorted. "No problem. I'm sure my pool will be a much more favorable environment for your 'studying'. But no frat parties, missy."

"Even if I invite the Italian hunk? I'm sure you'd like him."

"Sorry to disappoint, but no. Besides, you know that Buffy and dating are totally unmixy things."

"Does that mean there's still no romance in your life?"

"That's exactly what it means. Romance free life, thank you very much."

"Oh come on! Not even a potential hottie that makes your heart skip a beat and that you could consider as an eventual love interest?"

For a second, the look on Buffy's face turned dreamy, but she quickly caught herself.

Not quickly enough for Dawn not to notice though.

"I saw that! Buffy Summers. Spill."

"Give it a rest, Dawn. There's no one."

"Fine. Be that way. But I saw. There was definitely 'a look'. And you know I won't give up until I find out who the mysterious man who caught your att..."

"So. How was Paris?"

Dawn frowned at the abruptness of her sister. Something was definitely wrong with her and she couldn't wait to find out what was really going on in that pretty blonde head of hers.

Chapter 8

Forbidden

The red convertible turned into the prison's parking lot. Buffy stopped to slide her keycard to open the gate. She was tired from spending the night up listening to Dawn's anecdotes and looking at pictures, but she was happy. She had missed the little devil and it felt good to see her after so long. Even if it meant that she would now have to deal with the headache from Hell and a total lack of efficiency at work today.

Buffy went through the long security process to enter the secure area almost mechanically. She smiled and said good morning to the guards posted there, voluntarily ignoring the lack of sincerity of their tone when they answered her.

The young woman made her way to her office through the maze of corridors, stopping at Harmony's desk to collect her mail. She was looking through it absentmindedly when she suddenly heard Giles voice coming from somewhere behind her. She stopped what she was doing and waited for him to appear. A few seconds later, he walked by accompanied by another guard.

"Giles. Could you come here for a moment?"

"Yes, of course." He parted with the other guard and came toward her. "Good morning Buffy."

"Good morning. Where you on your way to your office?"

"As a matter of fact, no. I was going to the yard. Why do you ask?"

"About Spike, I was wondering if..."

"You don't have to worry about him, everything has been taken care of while you were taking time off for your injury."

"What do you mean 'taken care of'? Did he get himself into trouble while I was gone?"

Giles seemed genuinely puzzled. "Well... no. I mean..."

Buffy frowned. "Giles? Where IS Spike?"

"You were injured and we didn't want to upset you any further by asking you what to do with him before you left, so we took it upon ourselves to--do what needed to be done."

"So what? You thanked him on my behalf?" Buffy was now sensing that something was definitely wrong and she was getting mad.

"Thank him? Whatever do you mean? He was the one who attacked you, wasn't he?"

"Giles! What have you guys done to Spike?! He's the one who HELPED me, not attacked me! Are you telling me the poor guy has been in isolation all this time?"

Giles looked down. "Well--yes."

"Damn it! Go get him and bring him back here. I can't believe this!"

"After you got injured, the two guards who were with us took the initiative to take him to isolation. They told me what happened later and I approved. If we were mistaken in the prisoner's intentions..."

"Right now, I don't care what happened." She interrupted. "Get him. We'll talk about this later."

She watched him as he left the office in a hurry. She was pissed. She had spent all weekend thinking about what Spike had done and how she wanted to thank him. Who had ever seen a prisoner come to the aid of his warden? He had been so nice to her. And now, he probably thought she was an ungrateful bitch.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Dear Lord." Giles muttered. He sighed deeply while taking in the appearance of the blonde man sitting in front of him in the bare cell. He had dried blood under his nose, and a nasty bruise that was turning interesting shades of green and yellow on the left side of his jaw. He couldn't sit straight, probably because of some injury.

"Jake! Devon!" He barked angrily.

The two guards who had been chatting a few feet away looked in his direction.

"I rarely approve of your ways, but this time, you went too far. We will probably lose our jobs over this, you idiots! Ms. Summers is already angry enough that Spike was sent to isolation by mistake, when she sees what the bloody hell has been done to him, God knows how she will react."

"But Rup..." Jake started, but was automatically interrupted by Giles.

"It's Mr. Giles. I'm your superior here, it would do you well not to forget it."

Giles had never been this angry in his life. Things were looking up. He didn't have to put up with the likes of Wilkins and his predecessors anymore. His new boss was a good person who liked her job and he enjoyed being around the girl. But he could tell she was straight as an arrow, had strong morals, and would never stand for mistreatment in her prison. He would be blamed for what these two clowns had done to Spike. And THAT made him angry.

Devon tried to take over the explanation from his chastised friend but Giles wouldn't have it. "We only did it because he attacked the warden, Mr. Giles."

"Just how stupid do you think I really am? We both know you don't give a bloody damn about Ms. Summers. You only used it as an excuse to rough up Spike."

"But..."

"I don't want to hear it. Go back to work. And if you think there won't be any consequences to what you did, you're sadly mistaken."

Scared of losing his job, Jake tried to argue with Giles. "Couldn't you tell her he got injured during the riot? I'm sure she'd buy it!"

"I will not lie to cover your arses, I'm sorry."

Giles went to the small break room that was there for the use of the guards assigned to the isolation area, and came back with a wet cloth. He walked back into Spike's cell and tossed him the cloth.

"Clean yourself up, the warden wants to see you. You look like Hell."

Spike caught the wet cloth and without a word, cleaned the dry blood from his face.

Giles put the handcuffs on the prisoner's wrists. "Lets go."

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Buffy paced restlessly in her office, waiting for Giles to come back with Spike. She didn't know exactly what to tell the guy. Somehow 'sorry you spent the last four days alone in a cell the size of a closet for no reason' didn't seem to cut it.

Harmony opened the door, letting Spike and Giles walk in. The four of them remained silent for a few moments until Buffy finally sighed. "We're good Harmony. Thank you."

She gave the girl a pointed look and Harmony finally took the hint and left. Buffy couldn't bring herself to look at Spike. He was just standing there, staring straight ahead, his jaw visibly clenched. That's when she saw the bruise.

"What the Hell...?!" She took a deep calming breath, but her cheeks were turning pink from her anger. "Spike, have a seat and wait for me a minute. Giles, outside. Now."

"But... You won't leave him here alone?"

"This won't take long." She stepped outside of her office, closely followed by a wary Giles.

"What the fuck happened? He was BEATEN? I don't know how things were before I got here, but I won't stand for that kind of behavior in my prison."

She had left the office door open and could see from the corner of her eye that Spike hadn't moved to sit. He was still standing rigidly in the middle of the room. She couldn't blame him for being mad.

"Buffy," Giles said, trying to keep his voice low so Spike wouldn't hear, "let's not talk about this here. It's not good for the staff to argue in front of the prisoners. It gives them the impression of..."

"I want a staff meeting this afternoon. And you are going to tell me who's responsible for this."

"Of course. I regret this took place..."

"I believe you, but that doesn't change it."

She turned to her secretary. "Harmony, contact everyone from security and tell them there will be a staff meeting this afternoon at 4."

Harmony nodded. For once, she didn't dare saying anything. She was witnessing a side of Buffy that she had no idea existed.

"All right. Now if you'll excuse me. Wait in your office Giles, I'll call you when I want you to take Spike back."

She returned to her office where Spike was waiting, and closed the door behind her. She was suddenly uncomfortable. This wasn't the same man she had met a week ago. He seemed so cold, and hostility was rolling off him in waves.

Buffy wasn't sure what to do. She walked past him and to her desk where a carafe of fresh water was sitting. "Want a glass of water?"

He snorted at her lame attempt at breaking the ice, but didn't answer.

She poured two glasses anyway and went to sit on the leather couch against the large window that covered one side of her office. She put the glasses down on the coffee table in front of her.

"Come and sit with me, would you? We need to talk."

"'am perfectly fine standing right here. I just want to know why I'm here, warden, so I can leave."

"Originally, the reason I called you in here was to say thank you. Now it's to say I'm sorry." She answered in a soft voice.

Spike frowned at her unexpected answer, but didn't say anything.

"Don't just stand there. Come here."

He hesitated.

Buffy sighed and looked away. "I understand. Do you want me to call Giles and ask him to take you back? You missed breakfast already but I'll make sure you get something to eat... " She lowered her head. "I'm really sorry Spike."

When Buffy looked up, he was sitting next to her.

"What is there to be sorry about luv?"

She didn't answer, just looked at his bruised face. She shook her head slightly in disbelief, not liking the irony of it all. That's what he got for worrying about her well being?

"God, what have they done? I swear I had no idea. I left right after I regained consciousness. I did ask about you when I came to, but the nurse said 'he's been taken care of' and I never thought to ask her what she meant. Then she put me in a cab and sent me home. I should have told someone about your helping me, but things just got so crazy..."

"Hey now. No worries. You had just hit your head badly. I saw you fly into the bloody wall headfirst. I'm surprised you didn't have to go to the hospital after that blow. I should have known you were not the one who ordered me to the hole. But I thought maybe you misunderstood my intentions. It's no big a deal."

"Yes it is. And it's not only about you not deserving this treatment. Nobody will get beaten up by prison staff as long as I'm the warden here. That won't be tolerated. I don't know for how long this practice has been going on, but it's stopping now. The guards who did this are getting fired tonight."

Spike felt torn. He didn't want to defend the wankers who did this to him, but he also didn't think he mattered enough for such drastic measures. "They only did it because they thought I hurt you."

He didn't expect Buffy to laugh so much at his comment.

"Excuse my language, but these guys don't give a shit about me, Spike. They used what happened to me as an excuse to do what they wanted; they couldn't care less about my well being."

Spike frowned. "Why would you think that? I'm sure you're doing a fine job."

"Oh it's not about how capable I am. I guess I'm just not what they expected, and they can't get over the initial shock. Maybe they will, but it will take time before they realize that I'm perfectly competent, and start warming up to me. Anyway, this is not about me. I just wanted you to know how much I appreciated what you did the other day... and again, how sorry I am that things turned out the way they did. It was unfair to you."

"First, you have nothing to thank me for pet. I did what any respectable man would do when seeing a lady getting hurt. There's a lack of respectable men in this fine establishment. But I guess that can be explained by the fact that this is a prison." He winked playfully at her, but then got serious again. "Second, you have no business feeling sorry for me."

Buffy looked puzzled. "What?"

"You heard me pet. Don't feel sorry for me. I don't know how to explain that life sent me here. I've always been a good person. I've never even stolen a candy bar, let alone hurt someone. My only mistake was to fall in love with the wrong bird. So I guess I must have done something in a previous life that was pretty bad in order to deserve this. But since I've been here, I've done things that I'm not proud of. Bruised a lot of faces, got into a lot fights. Usually with wankers who, according to me, deserved it, but it's not an excuse."

He tried to reach his glass of water but winced and had to give up because of the pain shooting throughout his torso. Buffy saw that and gave it to him. He took a sip and continued.

"So, sure, I got beaten up for the wrong reason," he shrugged "but the 'why' doesn't really matter. Every punch I received, I've given to someone at one point or another. So a pretty bird like you, with all your morals and conscience, shouldn't worry herself with feeling sorry for someone like me. There's enough of me feeling sorry for myself for being here in the first place."

"So, let me get this straight. You think because you got yourself in a couple of fights, that means you deserve to get beaten up by prison guards? Sorry to say that I don't follow you here. This is jail, Spike. If you don't kick some people's ass, they'll walk all over you. Defending yourself, or giving a good ass kicking to someone who deserves it, doesn't make you a bad person."

"You probably don't remember but when we met for the first time last week, I vaguely told you about how I got my nickname..."

"You mean how you met your buddy Gunn? Of course I remember. What? You think I don't pay attention when my favorite prisoner tells me stories?" She smirked at him and he chuckled.

"I'm touched, really." Spike got more comfortable on the couch, mindful of his sore ribs, before continuing what he was saying. "Anyway, this story took place here. I had been incarcerated about two or three weeks before and I was working with some of the guys on the license plates. That's where I was assigned before you saved me from that horribly boring job. Thank you by the way. Charles was working with us. Suddenly, for no good reason, these guys started bothering him. There was no way he could have defended himself against the wankers, there were five of them against one. I don't know what got into me Buffy. I'm sorry, can I call you Buffy?"

"Of course you can."

"Yeah, so, I don't know what it was. Maybe it was the unfamiliarity of the violence surrounding me for the three weeks I had been here, or maybe I was just doing some transfer on this guy's situation. I don't know. Psychology has never been my strong point. But I became enraged. I could have just jumped into the fight and helped him if I was so concerned with fairness. But no. My eyes landed on a rusted spike on the floor. I have no idea how the thing got there in the first place and believe me, there were weeks of inspection of the facilities after my little stunt. So I grabbed the thing, walked up to one of the guys who was beating on Gunn, and stabbed him. Not with the intention of killing him, but I bloody well stabbed the wanker. I could have killed the guy. If he had moved, or if I had miscalculated my aim, I could have killed him. So you say that doesn't make me a bad person... Personally, I don't know anymore."

"Spike. You reacted to injustice. That's all. And like you said, a prison is a very different environment and it can affect how people react when they are not used to being surrounded by violence. And I think a nice guy who's never done anything wrong in his life, will react differently than a drug dealer who's killed hundreds of people."

The intensity of his blue eyes observing her made her blush and look away.

"Thank you."

"For what?"

"Understanding."

"You know, we're not all that different you and I."

"What? We're both unnaturally blonde?"

"Ha ha, funny. Speak for yourself. Where do you get the bleach anyway?"

"Good connections." He gave Buffy one of his sexy smirks. "Gunn's sister is nice enough to bring me some once in a while. And she brings me the good stuff too. She's a hairdresser. But, you were saying that we're not different? How so?"

She smiled wickedly. "I use to beat the shit out of jerks for the sake of justice and fairness... And because it was fun to hear them cry and beg."

Spike eyed her up and down before asking: "How much do you weight, pet? 80Lbs--when you're wearing ski boots?"

"Hey! I resent that. I'll have you know that I use to strike fear in the most fearless of bad guys in my time mister. I was very vicious."

They both laughed.

"Anyway, that's how I started working in prison, but I won't bore you with the story."

"You won't bore me. I'm interested."

Buffy suddenly looked uncomfortable. "You sure?"

"I swear. I want to know."

"I never told anyone about this. The only person who knows the real reason why I rebelled as a teenager is my friend Cordelia, and it's only because she was there that day."

"What happened?"

"I used to be your typical popular girl in school. Tons of so called friends, captain of the cheerleading squad, perfect hair, perfect clothes, permanent plastic smile on my face. I think I even smiled when I slept. I'm sure you get the picture."

He chuckled at the description.

"I was hanging out with the popular crowd too. I thought my life was perfect. Beginning of high school, a new girl moved to our school. Tara McClay. She was a very shy girl who acted like she didn't deserve to exist. My friends were nasty to her. It's so easy to pick on the weak. I talked to Tara sometimes when I'd see her at the library. She was a very nice girl. But whenever my friends would make fun of her, I was too much of a coward to say anything to defend her so I'd just stand by with that stupid smile on my face. If only I had known..." Buffy remained silent for a moment and looked away, lost in the painful memories.

"Did something bad happen?"

"Turned out, she was abused by her father. One day, I guess he was a little too enthusiastic and miscalculated his punch. It killed her."

Spike winced sympathetically, but didn't interrupt her.

"When I showed up at her funeral, half of the school was there, including the bitches who had dedicated their lives to making her miserable. The worst one of them, Judith, even had the nerve to get up and give a speech. She was dressed like she was going to a fashion show, and had one theatrical tear running down her face like she cared. I was so furious that I walked up to her and clocked her right in front of everybody. After that, things went downhill for me. I lost all of my friends, got kicked out of the squad, became one of the school's freaks. But I didn't care. Only my friend Cordelia didn't turn her back on me. I was always caught in fights, usually to defend other people. I ended up at the police station three times. On the third time, the sergeant suggested to my mom that she send me to work part time at the L.A. County prison to teach me a lesson. He had a contact there or something. It was supposed to scare me into behaving, but I liked it and decided that's what I wanted to do. So... yeah. That's how I started working in prison."

They remained silent for a few minutes after she was done talking. Spike had a serious expression on his handsome face. They were closer now. Her voice had been soft as she had shared her memories and Spike had inched closer to hear her. He tilted his head to look at her, and gave her a warm smile.

"You're amazing." He said softly.

She shook her head. "I don't think I am. There's nothing special about me, really."

"Are you kidding? I know I'm overstepping the boundaries of the prisoner/warden relationship here, but I've never been known to respect boundaries anyway so what the hell. I barely know you, but everything I learn about you amazes me. You're not only a smart, gorgeous, woman; you also have the most interesting and intriguing personality. Sorry if I'm being too honest but--If things were different, if the circumstances were not what they are, I'd probably be writing horrible poetry about you right now, and trying to figure out a way to ask you out without sounding like too much of a wanker."

He gave her a smile that could have stopped her heart, and before she realized what she was saying, she blurted out:

"If things were different, I'd probably be hoping that you'd ask me out right about now. But life isn't fair and things are the way they are..."

She said it in such a low voice that she wasn't even sure if he heard her. She couldn't bring herself to look into his eyes so she kept her eyes on the handcuffs around his wrists to keep herself grounded into reality.

"All right then." She said, in a overly perky tone that made her wince. "I guess I should get Giles now."

Before she knew what was happening, Spike lowered his head and pressed his lips against hers. It was so quick that it was over before she even realized it had happened.

Spike turned white as a ghost when he realized what he had done, his eyes filled with what looked like terror.

"Oh God! I'm so sorry, pet. I don't know what got into me..."

Reacting on instinct, Buffy pulled his face to her and kissed him. It was a sweet, yet passionate kiss, which ended all too soon. A soft caress of the lips. Tongues brushing lightly against each others, teasing, promising so much more. But as soon as Buffy got control over her raging hormones, she panicked and almost jumped away from him.

This time, they both had similar look of shock on their faces. Time seemed to stand still as they struggled to process what had just happened. The blood that had drained from Buffy's face was now coming back, making her blush furiously.

She let out a string of "ohgodohgodohgods", the words muffled by the hand covering her mouth.

Buffy jumped up and started pacing, running shaky fingers through her hair. "I can't believe I did that! Oh God! What have I done!"

Realizing that Buffy was becoming slightly hysterical and that he had to calm her down, Spike got up and stepped in front of her to stop her pacing.

"Buffy, please calm down. It's not such a big deal..."

"Not a big deal?! How can you say that?"

"Because it's not. Please, sit down pet, we'll talk about it."

She did as he said and sat back on the couch, but she did not calm down. "It is a big deal Spike! I could lose my job! And--and--what are you gonna think of me? That I'm one of these women who use their position to get away with sexual harassment or something?.. Oh God!!"

Normally, he would have laughed at how irrational and cute she was, but the situation wasn't allowing it. "Buffy! Look at me. First of all, that wasn't sexual harassment. I was the one who bloody well kissed you first, remember? Besides, I would never think anything bad of you. And also, you will not lose your job over this. The only way for that to happen would be for someone to find out, and unless there's a camera in here, that won't happen. It's only you and me here, and I would never tell anyone. Do you believe me?"

She nodded, but no word came out of her mouth.

"I would never hurt you Buffy. And you'd be devastated if you'd lose your job, am I right?"

She nodded again.

"Then I won't tell any living creature about it. Not even my confessor."

"... You have a confessor?"

Spike laughed. She smiled weakly.

Buffy leaned back in the couch, closed her eyes and took a deep calming breath.

"Are you feeling better pet?"

"A little. Spike--I just wanted to say--I...I've never, you know, done this before. Don't go thinking I'm a giant slut or something."

"I know luv. Don't worry, I would never think that."

"Thank you."

Spike sighed and smiled sadly at her. "I'm sorry reality had to come crashing back and ruin it because--it was a great kiss."

They looked into each other's eyes and Buffy's breath caught in her throat. She had to get up or she'd end up kissing him again. So she did get up, reluctantly.

She straightened her clothes and smiled at Spike who was still sitting on the couch. "I should call Giles. It's been too long already. I don't want him to get suspicious." She paused briefly, than asked: "Am I still blushing? Do you think he'll notice something happened?"

"No you're not. You look smashing. He won't notice anything I promise. Just act casual."

She gave him a warm smile, then went to the phone to call Giles' office. Spike stood up and went to sit in the chair in front of her desk to wait for the guard. Buffy noticed he had a sad, faraway look in his blue eyes.

"Spike? Something wrong?"

"It's nothing. Just... Could you promise me something?"

"Sure. What?"

"Promise me you won't let things get weird between us, that you won't avoid me. It meant a lot that you were so kind to me the first time we met... and today. I'd hate to lose that."

"I promise."

The door opened and Giles walked in. "Lets go Spike."

His back to Giles, Spike rolled his eyes dramatically and grimaced for Buffy's benefit. "Alright Rupert, hold your bloody horses, I'm coming."

Buffy chuckled, and waved discretely at him as he walked away.

"Oh, and Giles? Take Spike to Anya so she can make sure he's all right."

She waited until Giles closed the door, then went to sit in her chair, her head in her hands.

Chapter 9

Heading for a wall?

Buffy hadn't moved at all for a good half hour. She was still sitting at her desk, holding her head the way she had been after Giles and Spike left the room. When Harmony walked in without knocking, she didn't even look up.

"Buffy, Ms. Osbourne is here."

"Harmony, I.. "

A voice, that wasn't Harmony's, cut her off before she could get another word out.

"Wow. I knew it was you but--Wow! I can't believe it. Buffy Summers. I just can't believe--Did I already say wow?" Harmony kept looking between the grinning red head and the staring Buffy, not understanding what was going on. Then Buffy let out an excited squeal just before running into the red head's arms.

"Just my luck, I work for a freak." Harmony snorted before exiting the office.

"Oh. My. God. Willow!" Buffy had tears in her eyes when she pushed Willow at arm length, holding her by her shoulders to look at her. "Saying that you have changed would be an understatement."

"I could say the same to you Buffy. You look great."

"So do you."

They looked at each other and giggled like school girls.

"Damn this is so weird." Buffy said after she finally calmed down. "It's been what? Ten years?"

"Almost fourteen." Willow corrected with a sad smile. "I can't believe it's been that long. I remember like it was yesterday. I was so sad when my parents decided to leave L.A. But I thought it wouldn't be for more than a year and that we would manage to keep in touch somehow. Who would have known it would take them five years to grow out of their hippie phase?"

"So, you were in South America for five years?"

"No. We only stayed there for two months, then we went to Africa. I went to a private school there with other Americans. When my parents got tired of that and we finally moved back, they decided Sunnydale would be a great place to live. I tried to find you, but you moved... Oh Buffy, I missed you so much!"

Buffy hugged Willow again, crushing the poor girl against her.

"Huh... Buff? Blue doesn't look good on me."

"What?"

"Can't. Breath."

"Oh. Sorry!" She released her. "With all that, I forgot to ask. What are you doing here?"

"Hello? Work here. Didn't your charming and oh-so-sharp secretary tell you?"

"I think I would remember if she did."

"I'm the head criminologist here. I do most of the psychological evaluations and sit at the parole board."

"She told me the head criminologist was... "

"Ms. Osbourne?" Willow grinned. "Duh. I got married."

"No kidding!"

"Harmony is the only one calling me by my married name. And she usually says it with a touch of disdain. She's a bit upset that the big geek that I am is married and she's not."

"Oh Will, I'm so happy for you! We have so much to catch up on. Let's get out of here for a few hours so we can talk."

"Shopping?"

"Shopping!"

They walked out of the office giggling and talking excitedly. Harmony looked up from what she was doing.

"Where are you going?"

"Take my messages Harm, we're going for lunch and a bit of shopping."

"Oh." Harmony looked up, obviously trying hard not to look too hopeful. "Can I come with?"

"... Sorry Harm, but Willow and I haven't seen each other for years."

A hurt look flashed across Harmony's features before she could hide it. She huffed. "Fine. Whatever."

Buffy was about to leave, but she felt bad for the girl. She gave her a kind smile. "Tell you what. Why don't we go for drinks tomorrow after work?"

Harmony beamed. "Sure. I could probably help improve your social life." She looked pointedly at Willow.

Buffy chuckled and shook her head while Willow pulled her along by her sleeve. "This girl's a work of art, Will."

"Yep. Not the brightest crayon in the box, but she's entertaining."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Dawn? Dawnie are you home?"

Buffy dropped her stuff carelessly by the door and went to the kitchen. She looked out the window to see if her sister was outside. It was already dark and Dawn was nowhere to be seen. She went to the fridge in case her sister had left a note for her. As expected, there was a note.

Hey sis,
Met people today when I went out for coffee and they invited me to this club called The Bronze. If you feel like it, you can join me there. If not, I guess I'll see you tomorrow.
Love,
Dawn

Buffy sighed and went to her room to change into something more comfortable. She was physically and emotionally exhausted. She had been hoping Dawn would be home. It would have been a distraction from the thoughts that were bouncing around in her head.

Buffy took off her pink shirt and black leather skirt, letting the garments fall to the floor without a second glance. She then put on white boy's shorts and a white tank top, pulled her hair back into a loose ponytail and made her way downstairs to the basement.

The blonde girl looked around, suddenly feeling lost and lonely. She usually enjoyed silence, but tonight, she found it oppressive. She went to the stereo system and turned it on, then walked to the bar to get herself a drink. She was gonna keep it simple and grab a beer, but opening the mini fridge, the Margarita mix caught her eye and she changed her mind. She pulled out the ice, the mixer, the tequilla and the salt and busied herself making her drink. It kept her mind occupied for a moment and she welcomed the diversion. Too bad it didn't last.

Going to the couch, she sat down, her legs tucked under her. Buffy tried to keep her mind blank and just listen to the music without thinking. It worked for a while, but too soon, her mind drifter away to places she didn't want it to go. Changing tactics, she decided to focus on something positive that wouldn't lead to heartaches.

Her afternoon with Willow had been great. They had been apart for so many years, but it seemed their friendship had survived. Sure they had changed, but in a way, they were both still the same. Especially Willow. She might look much cooler now, but she was still a big lovable geek inside. Buffy had missed her so much. She remembered crying when Willow had left L.A. to go travel the world with her parents. They had known each other since they were three years old. She could still see little Willow in her mind, with her long red pigtails and her green dress, sitting Indian style in the tree house Buffy's dad had built for them. They were inseparable.

Buffy chuckled when she remembered how they used to hide in the tree to plot against Cordelia. Back then, Cordy was living down the street from them and was an insufferable little princess who would make their lives miserable. With Xander, they even created the 'We hate Cordelia' club. Willow almost choked on her latte this afternoon when she learnt that Cordelia and Buffy were now best friends. When Buffy gave her the final blow by adding that Cord married Xander, Willow spat out her coffee.

Buffy got up to get a refill of Margarita. She took the mixer back with her so she wouldn't have to get up again. She hadn't had anything to eat all day except for the ice cream she had at the mall, and was really tired, so the alcohol was already getting to her.

She'd had a great time shopping and talking with Willow. But it wasn't long before her mind had started wandering again to places she'd rather not go. The kiss. Willow noticed but didn't insist when Buffy obviously did her best to avoid answering. She just couldn't talk to her about it. Hell, she couldn't talk to anyone about it. And it was really killing her.

Damn was it ever killing her!

She slowly let herself slide down on the couch until she was sitting on the floor. She tried to put her empty glass on the coffee table, but her aim was a little off and it fell on the carpet. She giggled drunkenly and taking the mixer's container, she started drinking directly from it. Who cared, she was alone anyway. She had decided that the best solution to her problem was to drink until she wouldn't think of Spike's lips anymore. Or, until she passed out. Unconsciousness sounded very good.

How could she be so attracted to a guy she barely knew? This wasn't like her at all. She had dated guys for months without ever being able to feel anything for them, and yet, there she was, longing for a man she only met a few times. She wondered what the hell was wrong with her. Why did she have to fall for the only guy she really couldn't have? And the worst part was that even through her panic this morning when she realized what she'd done, she had still been dying to kiss him again. Her work was the most important thing in her life, and yet, she had been willing to jeopardize everything for one man.

Her eyelids were starting to get heavy and soon, she drifted off to sleep. That's how Dawn found her when she got back a few hours later. The young girl shook her head when she saw the state her sister was in.

"Damn it Buffy, what the Hell?" She asked, mostly to herself.

She approached her sleeping sister and crouched next to her. Dawn took away the mixer's container Buffy was hugging in her sleep, and tried to wake her by shaking her shoulder. Buffy groaned, then finally open one eye.

"Mmmm... What?"

"You know, if you wanted to party, you could have joined me at the club instead of drinking by yourself like a big loser."

"Mnot a loser. Just pathetic."

"Don't you have to work in a few hours?"

"I'm the freakin' warden... I do what I want." Buffy said, her speech slightly slurred.

"Oh Buffy," The younger girl said mockingly. "you are such a great example to me. If someone ever asks me where I got my sense of responsibility, your name will definitely come to mind."

"Pfff. 'm waaaay responshible. 'm taking the morning off. I'll stay late, is all. If someone's not happy with it, they can tell the warden. Oh, wait... that's me." Buffy giggled, proud of her cleverness.

"Whatever you say Buff. Let's get you to bed."

She helped Buffy up the stairs, and unceremoniously dropped her on her bed.

"Get some sleep. We'll go out for breakfast tomorrow morning and then I'll drive you to work."

"Just an excuse to get the car." Buffy mumbled, already half asleep. Then, she was gone.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Around 10 am, Dawn walked into Buffy's room, going straight to the window. She pulled the curtains apart, letting the sun light flow into the room. Buffy yelped and hid under her white duvet.

"Good morning sunshine!" Dawn said while noisily shaking a bottle of Tylenols. "Don't hide, it's time to rise and shine and welcome a new day."

She climbed on the bed and hugged the form of her sister through the duvet. A mumble came from under the covers.

"What was that?"

Buffy pulled the covers from her face. "I said, are you overdosing on Prozac or something?"

"Ha ha, funny. I just figured that in the state you must be in right now, I need to be over joyous in order to even get you out of bed. Let's go. I'll start the shower, pick out your outfit, then we'll go out for breakfast. I met the cutest guy last night--can't wait to tell you all about it."

Buffy pulled the covers back up. Not having it, Dawn attempted to pull her from under there by her foot. A quick pillow fight followed, but it didn't last. Buffy moaned, holding her painful head.

"Stop it! My head... It hurts like a bitch."

"The shower and Tylenols will help. So stop being stubborn and get out of there. It's your fault anyway for drinking yourself unconscious."

"Never again. I promise."

"Yeah, yeah. Get in the shower and don't make promises you can't keep."

Half an hour later, Buffy was making her way to the car. She was wearing simple black trousers, a gray sleeveless turtleneck and big black sunglasses. Dawn, who was waiting for her leaning on the car, snickered.

"I'm sure no one will notice anything. But don't take the sunglasses off, cause if your staff sees what your face looks like right now, they'll run away screaming."

"Shut up and drive." Buffy pouted, tossing Dawn the Miata's keys. She knew her sister's rule about not getting in a car with her if she was behind the wheel, and she felt too shitty this morning to argue with the brunette.

Dawn drove to the nearest Denny's in silence. She parked the car and they went inside, finding a boot that was well away from other customers so they could have some privacy. They ordered without even looking at the menu. Breakfast at Denny's was a tradition for the sisters. Especially when it was time to help with bad cases of hangover.

Dawn fidgeted with her napkin while waiting for the coffees and blueberry pancakes to arrive. She wanted to wait for Buffy to talk first, thinking that she had played 'annoying Dawn' enough for the day. Make that for the month. After she got her coffee and took a sip of it, Buffy finally opened her mouth.

"How was your night? Had any fun?"

"It was cool. I liked the place. Too many high school kids though."

"Weren't you a high school kid yourself only a few months ago?"

"I'm in College now. I'm a grown up. I don't hang with kids."

Buffy snickered. "Sorry, you're right. You're the epitome of cool now."

"Shut up!" Dawn whined playfully.

Buffy finally started relaxing. The headache was getting more bearable. She manage to give Dawn a weak smile. "I'm feeling a bit better. Thanks for getting me out of bed. I really can't afford to miss an entire day of work. So sorry about the ubber crankiness this morning but yesterday... not such a great day."

"Did something bad happen at work?"

"No.. Hey, do you know who I'm working with?"

"No. Who?"

"Willow! Do you remember her? We were best friends when we were kid. She left town when she was thirteen."

"The little red head geek? The one who babysat me that one time and decided that Dante's Inferno would be a great bedtime story for a five year old?"

"It put you to sleep, didn't it?"

"Sure did!" Dawn laughed.

"She's not a geek anymore anyway. She married a rock star."

"No way! Anyone famous?"

"You know that group that plays a lot these days in L.A.? Dingoes Ate My Baby? He's the bassist. Oz."

"Get. OUT! That's freakin' awesome! Wow. And what is she doing at the prison?"

"She's the criminologist."

"So you guys are gonna be working together a lot then. That's really great."

"I know!" Buffy took a bite of her blueberry pancake.

"Who's Spike?"

Buffy violently choked on her pancake.

Dawn cringed. She had hoped to make Buffy react, but not that much. She was so excited the night before when Buffy had mumbled the name in her sleep. She had put two and two together. First, she found her drunk off her ass, then she said a guy's name. It was no rocket science. She thought it would be easier to get the story out of her by shocking her. But seeing the reaction, she was starting to feel bad.

Noticing Buffy coughing loudly, the waitress discretely brought her a glass of water.

"Sorry Buff. Didn't mean to cause a near death experience by saying that name. It's just that you said 'Spike' last night after I put you to bed and I wanted to find out who it was. Didn't know I'd almost kill you by doing that."

"I'm all right." Buffy said, out of breath. "It's just the last thing I expected you to ask."

"Is that why you got drunk last night? Because of that guy?"

"Can we not be talking about this right now?"

"Why?"

"Because I CAN'T talk about this. Not even with you."

Dawn chose to ignore her and keep asking. "I might tease you a lot, but despite all your issues, you're still a catch. So why is he not bringing you flowers and bonbons, and taking you out on romantic dates? Is he gay or something?"

Buffy growled menacingly.

"Married? Oh, I know. He's a dangerous murderer! Or even better, one of your prisoners."

Buffy turned dangerously white.

"Buffy?.." Dawn's eyes widened with realization. "You have got to be kidding me. No way! Are you telling me the guy who got you all mushy and pathetic is a prisoner?!"

"Why don't you publish it in the Sunnydale Post while you're at it, Dawn."

"Sorry. But--are you out of your MIND?"

"Yes, yes that's exactly it." Buffy answered in a sarcastic tone. "I forgot to take my medication. That's why I'm pinning over a convict. Thank you ever so much for pointing that out to me. You're a great help."

"Ok. I'll try to calm down and turn off the judgmental part of my brain for a second so I can try to understand this. But first, I have to ask. He didn't kill anybody, did he?"

"No. He didn't."

"All right. That's good. What is he in for then?"

Buffy blushed and looked away. "Well, technically--huh--Murder."

It was Dawn's turn to spit out her coffee.

"But you just said..."

"He didn't kill anybody, it was someone else... Or at least, I'm pretty sure he didn't."

This time, her younger sibling laughed openly in her face.

"Buffy, be serious. You've been working in prison for ten fucking years, don't tell me you believe that shit? Prisons are filled with innocents. That's common knowledge. No matter how hot he is, you can't be that naïve? He could be just another psychopath that happens to be really charming and convincing."

"Are you done being a bitch? Can I talk?"

"Talk. I'll shut up."

Buffy sighed. "Did it ever happen to you that someone tells you something completely unbelievable, but you look into their eyes and believe them?"

"Yes. If it's someone I KNOW. Like for example, if you'd tell me: "Dawn, last night, I ran outside around my house butt naked with a hot pink feather boa around my neck." I'd believe you because I know you... And you're INSANE."

"God, my sister is sooo adorable."

"I know." Dawn grinned.

"I have met hot prisoners before you know. Hot prisoners who told me they were innocent. Did I believe them? No. Why? Because they were not innocent. But William... There's just a sincerity in his eyes, a passion... I don't know how to explain it, but can you for once trust me on this? I'm not being fooled because of my feelings for him. I swear. And yes, despite the fact that I tend to believe him, I'm still on my guards just in case."

"Did you say the word 'feelings'? You have feelings? You? Buffy Summers?"

"Well..." Buffy started playing with her food, pushing it around her plate, looking embarrassed. "Not feelings feelings. But... Ya know."

"Do you realize it's the first time I ever hear you saying you have feelings for a guy? Ever! Wow. This is more serious than I thought. Why does it have to be about a potential murderer?!.. You didn't act on it, did you?"

The blonde girl looked away guiltily.

"BUFFY!"

"Dawn, you can never repeat this to anybody, understand? Not even your best friend or mom or... anybody! If someone finds out, I'll lose my job."

"I know. I wouldn't tell anyone. What happened?"

"We kinda kissed yesterday. That's why I was so upset last night. I don't know how it happened. It just did. We were talking in my office and, next thing you know, there were lips connecting. And tongues. I know it's hard for you to believe because you never met him, but I don't think he's bullshitting me to get his way or anything. The attraction goes both ways."

"Buffy," Dawn said softly. "the guy is in for murder. And unless someone proves that he is innocent, he's guilty. He's there for life. Nothing good can come out of this. Couldn't you just fall for the guy next door? Everything has to be complicated with you. What kind of a relationship can you have with a guy who's stuck in jail until he dies?"

"Well... Do you really wanna hear my crazy plan?"

The brunette sighed heavily. "I probably should answer no, but do tell."

"Keep in mind that it's not just because I like him. I want to do this because I think it's unfair for someone to waste their lives in prison when they haven't done anything."

Dawn shook her head. "I have a feeling I won't like what's coming."

"I want to try to find out more about the guy Spike says is the real murderer. If Spike is lying, I'll find out one way or another. If he's saying the truth, then I can maybe try to get some kind of proof that he's not guilty and possibly get him out of jail."

"Sounds potentially dangerous. And again with the insanity. Buff, it's just a guy you know..."

"Just a guy?! It's not just a guy, it's a human being. I told you it's not because I like him, it's because it's unfair. What if it was you, huh? What if someone killed a friend of yours and made it look like it was you who did it? Wouldn't you like it if someone cared enough to get you out of jail?"

"I see your point, but it's still dangerous."

"I know, Dawnie. But knowing that someone in my prison is innocent goes against everything I believe in. I couldn't live with myself if I don't at least try to do something. Of course, it helps that he's the most gorgeous guy I've ever seen, he's smart, funny, sensitive and turns me into a puddle of goo every time I see him..." She added with a wicked grin.

Dawn took a deep breath and let it out slowly. Despite her disapproving, there was some kind of understanding in her blue eyes when she looked at her sister.

She knew her well. They had lived on their own, just the two of them, the year their mom had been sick. That time alone together had brought them so close that they knew everything there was to know about each other. And Dawn knew that Buffy was the type of person who always, ALWAYS, did the right thing. She often thought that if she ever decided to write a comic book, she'd use Buffy as a model for her superhero. The girl always had someone she wanted to save and when she'd set her mind on something, Dawn knew Buffy would not give up no matter what she said. "Buffy, you know I love you more than anything, right? You and mom are my entire world. When I found out mom had brain cancer and she had to go to that private clinic in Boston, I felt like the world was falling down around us. I was so scared. But I had you. We had each other. We went through some tough times together and you became so important to me. I just don't want you to get hurt. Physically or emotionally. And now I'm seeing you heading straight for the concrete wall at full speed and it frightens me. My heart wants to think that it's so romantic and sweet and you'll get your happy ending somehow. But my head warns me that it will most likely end with tears and pain. I don't want that for you. I just want you to be happy. Promise me you'll be careful and you won't do anything stupid."

Buffy had tears in her eyes when she finally looked up at her sister. "Don't worry about me, Dawnie. I promise you nothing bad will happen. I'll be careful."

Chapter 10

Journal of a convict

"Stop giving him the evil look of death. Spike would never do something like that. He's like a Jedi. He's a pure soul betrayed by society, a hero wasting away in this unholy place because of a cruel twist of fate."

Jonathan glared at his friend who had a dreamy look on his face, "Yeah? Well, Darth Vader was a Jedi too. Didn't stop him from turning to the dark side of the Force, did it."

Andrew huffed, clearly insulted, "Darth Vader was an idiot."

"Darth Vader was cool, you moron!"

"Never as cool as Spike, you brain dead!!"

"At least, Darth never hit Leia, or any woman!" Jonathan yelled back.

"He did too! Or at least, if he didn't, he got someone to do it for him. Spike didn't hit the warden."

Jonathan pinched him.

"Ouch! You freak!" Andrew slapped the shorter boy upside the head.

"Hey! Quit it!!"

The two bickering boys got silent when Spike walked by, on his way out of the cafeteria with his friend Gunn.

"Spike! Wait up!"

Andrew walked quickly to where Spike was standing, pulling Jonathan along with him.

"Oh bollocks," Spike rolled his eyes and kept walking, "Go away."

"Come on, Spike, wait... Is it true?"

"What?" he asked, still walking.

"Is it true you beat up the warden? Everybody says..."

"I bloody well did not!" Angry, the blonde man stormed off, closely followed by Gunn.

Andrew turned to give Jonathan a smug look, "See? Told you so!"

"Fine. Whatever."

Gunn trotted behind his angry friend, "Spike. Come on man, chill. What's the deal with you anyway?"

Spike stopped abruptly and turned to face the taller man, "What's the deal? What's the DEAL? Let me tell you what the bleeding deal is, mate. Every wanker in the place has been giving me the thumbs up since yesterday afternoon. They all think I beat up Bu... Ms. Summers, a woman who's half my size, and they praise me for it. It sickens me. They think I'm the kind of man who would send a woman flying into a wall. Bloody hell, they think I'm the kind of man who would put a bullet into a woman's heart. When did this happen, Gunn? When did my life get turned so upside down and inside out that people would think me capable of such a thing? When did this happen? That's not me. I'm not like that."

"Hey, don't sweat it buddy. These guys don't matter. They don't know you."

Spike looked away, his inner turmoil written plainly on his face, "Nobody knows me. I'm not even sure I know myself anymore. I can't deal with this, Charles. I--I just can't deal." He started walking away.

"Spike! Where are you going?"

He didn't stop, "Library. I'm late for my shift.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was getting late, and there were only two guys left in the library. Not your typical bookworms, but they were quietly reading their porn magazines, only exchanging a comment once in a while. Spike appreciated the peaceful moment. These were a rare luxury at the prison. He needed the time to organize his thoughts. Quality solitary moments were one of the things he missed the most about freedom. Well, that, and spicy chicken wings. The warden had no idea how happy she made him by assigning him to the library. With most of the prisoners having no interest in books whatsoever, it was usually the quietest place in Sunnydale's prison.

It wasn't the most impressive book collection-mostly donations from Sunnydale's libraries-but to Spike who grew up surrounded by books, it was heaven. Ten or so bookshelves, five tables with ratty old chairs that looked like they had been pulled out of a dumpster, and five study rooms, made up what they called the library. The prison was offering classes to keep the convicts busy, and they used these rooms to work on their assignments.

Spike pulled out a small notebook from the back pocket of his pants. It was a gift from Charles' sister. That girl was an angel. Spike had no one visiting him, no one bringing him anything. He had been going insane without anything to write on, so she had brought him a leather bound journal and a smaller, matching, notepad.

Spike's only family was his father, Ethan, and he had abandoned his son to his fate completely. The man's only worry when he had found out about his son's troubles was about the consequences on his own reputation. He never even showed up in court to show William some support. There was only one phone call, and it was basically to tell him that he wasn't his son anymore.

Spike sat behind the counter and started scribbling away in his pad. Writing had always been his way of keeping his sanity. It had helped him through the worst moments of his life. Angel and Darla had teased him relentlessly about it, but he didn't give a bloody damn if they thought he was a nancy boy. Well, considering the turn of events, maybe he should have given a damn. He probably shouldn't have let them see that he was a hopeless romantic fool. By doing so, he had only given them the perfect victim for their evil machinations, but that didn't matter anymore now, did it.

He tried to find coherent words to describe what happened the day before, but it seemed like an impossible task. He wasn't even sure if he was writing a story that came right out of his fantasist mind, a poem, his thoughts... It was a little bit of everything.

Buffy's beauty, her strength, the sharpness of her mind. How relieved he had been when he found out she hadn't known about him being locked up in isolation. The fear that coursed through his veins the second he realized he had just kissed her. And most of all, the explosion of emotions he had felt when she kissed him back.

She tasted like a perfect summer day. Ripe strawberries, juicy watermelon, refreshing lemonade. I could almost feel the warmth of the sun on my skin, and the coolness of the freshly cut grass underneath my bare feet. In a matter of seconds, she took me away from here and made me travel half way across the world to a place I never knew existed. I felt the incredible urge to pray and beg whichever God is looking over us, to let me stay there forever. But then reality came crashing back on us and left me broken and with the strong desire to weep.

Spike looked up when one of the guys laughed and made a lewd comment. He pointed something out in the magazine he was reading and the other guy laughed too. Then the quiet settled once more and Spike went back to his writing.

How am I supposed not to want this again? It's like offering a sip of fresh water to a man dying of thirst, then taking the glass away from him. I almost regret she walked into my life. I was getting used to my misery before she came along, almost comfortable with it. But it now seems unbearable to me. Is life done playing games with me? Everything I've ever had has been taken away. Isn't that enough? Why taunt me in such a cruel way as to let me meet the perfect woman at the worst possible time of my life? I barely know her, and yet it feels like I do. And the ironic thing is, she seems to be feeling the same way. But what hurts the most is that she probably regrets that brief moment between us with all her heart right now. She's probably afraid that somehow, the word will get out. I can only hope that she knows in her heart that I wouldn't betray her confidence and that this kiss will remain between us.

"Did I ever tell you how I find that writers are useless members of society that only give people more reasons to waste time with their nose in books?"

"Did I ever tell you how I enjoy scraping midgets' faces against brick walls? I'd be worried if I were you, Snyder, you're pretty damn short."

"You can't get me with threats, Spikey. I've been a high school principal before ending up in jail. I've mastered the art of threats a long time ago."

"And I've mastered the art of putting threats to execution a long time ago. Now be a good troll and bugger off before I get really cross with you and decide to kill you in your sleep."

"Stupid, idiotic, bleached, psycho freak," Snyder mumbled while walking away. "You're a threat to society, Spike, and a waste of perfectly good living space. That's all I have to say about it."

"Yeah, yeah, love you too. Troll."

Spike shook his head, annoyed at the interruption, **Where was I? Oh, yeah...**

...but despite everything, despite how wrong it is and how much it could potentially hurt both of us--God, I can't help but hope that I'll see her again.

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