I found this somewhere...feel free to add suggestions to it, just email me...
You might be a goth if...
*You pay 6 bucks for cigarettes that match your outfit
*You wear sunglasses in the produce department at night
*You won't get in a fight because it might smudge your make up
*You wake up still drunk at 3 in the afternoon with anonymous black lipstick on your face
*People can't tell whether you're searching for a missing contact or dancing
*The only day you feel normal is Halloween
*You don't know whether the person you're sleeping with is male or female until you're actually in bed with them
*You don't care
*The shade of powder you wear is called "Sheet Of Paper"
*You were rooting for the vampires in "From Dusk Til Dawn", Lost Boys", etc.
*The Count was your favorite Sesame Street character as a child
*You watch Sesame Street as an adult just to see The Count
*You wear long, velvet coats in the middle of summer
*You go to Denny's at 5 in the morning and think, "These are my people"
*You think dead flowers are prettier than live ones
*You think anything dead is pretty
*You refer to your age in mortal years
*You give yourself the honorary title of Lord or Lady
*You know what a Malkavian is
*You know what a Malkavian is because you've been there, done that
*You have the t-shirt
*You dressed as The Crow for Halloween one year
*You have dressed as The Crow for Halloween the past few years
*The club you frequent has concocted an original drink called "The Vampire's Kiss"
*You buy $15 fishnets and rip them on purpose
*You think blood is "pretty"
*Your combat boots cost more than it takes to feed a third world child for two years
*You've willingly undergone cosmetic dental surgery
*You own 16 or more Cleopatra c.d.'s
*You own even 1 Projekt c.d.
*Friday the Thirteenth is your lucky day
*You can't decide whether Morticia Addams or Lily Munster is prettier
*You decide Wednesday blows them both away
*You could easily blow $500 in a Halloween store
*You could spend all $500 on just make up
*You were disappointed to find out that "American Gothic" is a portrait of two farmers
*You claim the Chupacabra is a friend/relative of yours
*You own a hearse
*You own a hearse and don't work in a funeral parlor
*You keep a coffin in the back as "decoration"
*You keep a coffin in the back as a bed
*You think of the hearse as the "family car"
*You think heresy is a religion
*You claim heresy as YOUR religion
*You own a rosary that you wear
*You own many rosaries that you wear
*You own a glow-in-the-dark rosary that alternates between your neck and the rearview mirror in your car
*You fashion your eyeliner after a culture that's been dead over 2000 years
*You wish to name your first born Lestat
*You plan to name your first born after ANY Anne Rice character
*You didn't know they were characters
*Your purse is large, square and metal
*The purse has scratches from being used in a fight
*It has scratches from being kicked on the dance floor
*This is the reason it was scratched in a fight
*You think bats are "cute"
*You argue on whether Poppy Z. Brite or Anne Rice has the more realistic view on vampires
*You can debate both sides of that argument
*You've participated in one of those "Do you think Tom Cruise was good as Lestat?" conversations
*You've started one of those conversations
*You saw Valor on the street, you would throw your large, metal purse at him
*You and your friends enjoy congregating in a local graveyard
*No one you know is buried there
*You and your friends take lengthy drives to visit non-local graveyards
*You take pictures of the gravestones while reciting Oscar Wylde or singing "Cemetry Gates" by The Smiths
*You know the words to "Cemetry Gates" by The Smiths
*You know who The Smiths are
*Your favorite poem is "The Raven" by Edgar Allen Poe
*Your favorite poem is
"Metamorphosis of a Vampire" by Charles Baudelaire
*You spell Vampire either Vampyre or Vamphyre
*Your boyfriend complains that his ribs just don't stick out the way they used to
*Your girlfriend complains that you look better in her black, velvet skirt than she does
*You refer to others as "The Normals"
*You refer to our leather-clad brethren as "Those Industrialites" or "Industrial-heads"
*You go to South Beach, but have never seen the ocean
*You can reminisce through all 4 locations of The Kitchen Club and 2 of The Church
*You put on The Wake and practice dancing in front of the mirror
*You practice with your own personal strobe AND blacklight
*You are too poor to afford either and stole the lights off the Christmas tree
*You can't even tell whether you're looking for a missing contact or dancing
*You are happy when no one has ever heard of your favorite band
*When someone else "discovers" you're favorite band, you find another favorite band
*Christians accost you with pamphlets on the street frequently
*Jehovah's Witnesses accost you with pamphlets on the street frequently
*You accost Christians with pamphlets on the street
*Satanists just look at you and smile
*You laugh hysterically during those Church Of Latter-Day Saints commercials
*You call for the free Bible anyway
*You take great pleasure in vandalizing said Bible after waiting impatiently by your mailbox for 4-6 weeks
*You stop vandalizing the Bible momentarily to look up Psalm 69
*In your honest opinion, the image of Jesus ruins the beauty and natural fluidity of the cross
*You've been with your significant other for over a year and still wonder what they look like without make up
*You and your boyfriend fight over make up
*You decide to get matching his/hers make up caddies to separate your make up
*You smudge your lipstick on purpose to look like Robert Smith
*You eat those limited edition pop-tarts just because they have bats on them
*You save them because Hey!...they're limited edition
*You call them goth-tarts
*You know what Renfield's Disease is
*You have Renfield's Disease
*You have taken anything on this list personally
*You were offended
