Title: Coin Toss
Summary: "What's the most you've ever lost on a coin toss?"
Disclaimer: I don't own it. Please don't sue me.
I can feel her eyes on me as I flick the quarter again, sending it toward the ceiling.
"Do you have to keep doing that?" She asks, sipping the straw of her overly-fruity drink.
I look toward her as the coin lands deftly in my open palm, trying to remember why it was I decided to buy the girl a drink in the first place. Instead of answering I grab my beer and take a swig as again I flick the quarter, my eyes trailing its ascent.
"What's the most you've ever lost on a coin toss?" I ask, my eyes still not straying from the coin as it lands safely in my palm. I hear her snort. Not the kind of snort that can be construed as cute, but the kind where I'm fairly positive that right now she's trying to cover up that half of her Cosmo just came out her nose.
"My dignity." She says simply. "Streaking through what I thought was an empty football stadium. I'm was at the 50 yard line when the lights came on, lighting up the nearly full stands."
"Harsh." I say, my voice dripping with sarcasm. She turns toward me with her lips pursed.
"Well what's the most you've ever lost on a coin toss?" She says, daring me to top her story.
The sound of the quarter hitting the floor barely registers. I feel my throat tighten but manage to answer her.
"You don't give up do you?"
"Not on my friends, no."
"Yeah, because you and me are such solid buds, right?"
"We could be. It's not too late."
"There was a girl." I say, but I feel her scoff and turn away.
"Great, time for the ex talk. I'm not real sure I wanna go that far yet." She says, ordering another drink, on me apparently.
"You asked, I'm telling you." My voice is practically a growl. I hate that thinking about her still makes me so emotional. She rolls her eyes and motions for me to continue, but I'm not really sayin' it for her anymore.
"I did...I did some bad shit. You know like...shit that normal people don't forgive you for, ya know?" I know she doesn't. "But B...Buffy..." My throat tightens, how long has it been since I said her name?
"You told me I was just like you. That I was holding it in."
"Ready to cut loose?"
"Okay then. Give us a kiss."
"Man I'm gonna miss this.
Should've been there, B, quite a ride."
"...no matter how much I tried to push her away, she kept coming right back." I down the rest of my beer and motion for another one, not even bothering to see if she's still listening.
"Then one night, I decided to cut and run. Skip town. She found me and I could tell, ya know, I could see it in her eyes that this was my last chance. She was gonna give up on me after that night. Leave me to my own devices."
"Interesting, so what happened?" This chick is so god damn flippant it's takin' all of my will power not to slap her across the bar. I don't know why I keep talkin' but like I said, it's not for her anymore.
"We...fought." Just not each other. "And afterward we're both kind of standing there, lookin' each other in the eye. I knew I had a choice to make."
"So she saved you."
"She could have left me there to die, Giles, but she didn't."
"She opted to come back to town with you. That... That bodes well. She still has a lot to face before she can put this behind her."
"I'm not gonna give up on her."
I stoop to pick the quarter up off the ground, letting my eyes flicker back and forth between the two sides.
"Heads I go back to Buffy. Tails I...do the one thing she could never forgive me for." I barely mutter it, I'm pretty sure she's left by now...doesn't matter.
"You sent your boy to kill me."
"That's right, I did."
"I thought he might be. What with you standing here and all."
"I guess that means you have a job opening."
The coin slips from my hand, mirroring the tear that slips from my eye.
"I'm sorry Buffy."
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