Gourry halted at a T- junction within the corridors (if the term "T-Junction" still applied.) The floor showed signs of struggle, not to mention the walls were falling apart from spell damage. Gourry peered for a moment further, shrugged, and took off down the left.

            Little did Gourry know that he had just witnessed the exact location where the Zelgadi Alliance had fallen apart. The results were, if you can imagine, not very clean.

            Not-Zelgadis stumbled wearily out of the main entrance to the Temple and into the street. The countless other temples on the block were painted pink by the setting sun, but the chimera was in no mood to enjoy it. His upbringing and common sense begged himself to find an inn, or a hammock, or at least a bed of leaves before he collapsed, but an increasingly loud instinct recommended just collapsing anywhere. The latter voice won out and Not-Zel found a nice rock in the middle of the street to sleep on.

            Zelgadis (or at least the Zelgadis that we're used to,) was still wandering inside the monstrous black temple, not quite sure if he was going deeper or not. He didn't notice a soft click or a fallen flag stone, but a trap door opened beneath his feet and dropped him into the sewers where, as luck would have it, he chanced to find the very same chewing gum he had disposed down the drain earlier. This was about the extent of Zelgadis's luck that day.

            Meanwhile, Zelgadis (Zelgadis in his own mind... Wait, that's no help at all. Let me start again.)

            Meanwhile, the human Zelgadis exited the temple out a side door and started for the neighboring Temple of Alchemy, having a good hunch about who had stolen the Cockatrice Blood. He could almost taste the overwhelming power of the blood on his lips...

            ...when he was nearly run over by a second wave of Lina-ettes. A well timed Levitation spell had saved him with mere seconds to spare, and the non-chimera decided it much wiser (and safer) to observe the unfolding situation from a bird's eye point of view.

            Gourry turned a corner to bump into Lina. No, wait it couldn't Lina; the person he hit was femininity shaped. Gourry looked up to find instead a Lina-ette. In her hands was an intricately decorated glass bottle filled with a deep-maroon liquid.

"' 'cuse me." He lifted the slightly blushing girl to her feet.

Gourry paused. Could that bottle be the Titan Saliva-thing that Lina was talking about?

"Sorry to pry," Gourry said the girl politely, "But are you attached at all to that the bottle of liquid?"

            The girl, befuddled as to where the conversation was going, slowly shook her head.

"Would you possibly give it to me?" Gourry asked, rubbing the back of his head.

"...sure," the Lina-ette answered softly, handing him the container.

"Thanks."

            Gourry walked down the hall with a large smile on his face. He had gained the precious item that had been fought long and hard over. The fate of the story, not to mention all characters within it, rested upon that container.

Gourry scratched his head. What the hell was he supposed to do with it?

            Now that Rimmour had made his proposal, he thought back a minute. Could this woman be really trusted? Could any woman, for that fact? Weren't they notorious for screwing things up? He tried to envision what might happen if they teamed up:

......................................

            Rimmour had a SD vision of himself and Filia stomping gleefully on Xellos's head. Then Filia wrapped her chibi arms around Rimmour and pecked him on the cheek, and then they were dancing! There was laughter and Flowers and smoked fish!

......................................

            Rimmour was slumped next to Filia with a goofy grin on his face when he suddenly stood up with a jerk and struck a commandeering pose.

"Right! We'll do it! But first........uh....."

            He really didn't want to say this.....

"We are a trifle lost... d'you have any way of getting us out of this damn temple, in a jiffy? ........ Miss Dragon."

            He quirked an eyebrow at Miss Filia.... He HAD noticed her tail.

"M-miss Dragon?" she stammered. "I... er... well... I guess you saw my tail, huh? I'm sorry, but if you hadn't noticed, I was also lost before I met you... so I can't really help."

            Filia thought for a while, then appeared to come up with an idea.

"Unless... no. I don't want to cause another scene of massive destruction." sigh. "Then again, perhaps I could teleport us out of here."

            The thought of voluntarily touching the priest made her skin crawl, but there was no help for it. Sighing once more, Filia took hold of Rimmour's sleeve and concentrated. When she opened her eyes, they were already standing in the street.

            Rimmour stood stalk for a moment, then collapsed to the dirt road...he then jerked up, trying to salvage his pride as he dusted off his purple robes.

"Good God, woman! You couldn't have told me that was coming?" He noticed they were out of the temple. "Ah...very good! Of course, I had an inkling as to where we were in there, but it would have taken a bit longer.... Now what?... Ah! Yes! This way!"

            And, without so much as a "thank you," he dragged Filia from the ominous Temple of Restoration to his tacky orange and fuchsia Temple of Alchemy. They went in through the main entrance, but instead of going on past the main hall, they went sharply left and into a cheerfully lit, rust-red booth. Over the booth was a sky blue painted sign saying "TEMPLE GIFT SHOPPE".

            Inside were shelves and shelves of holy relics: Skeletonized fingers of famous sorcerers (each sorcerer mentioned must have had at least 39 fingers on each hand), stones from sacred mountains and cities (which all looked rather the same,) Blessed wine, scarves, keychains. One inventory was a series of wooden disc's the size of millstones with Rimmour's face stamped on them...they were on a shelf marked "clearance: 90% off". Rimmour went past all these things, to the back of the store. There stood a WALL of beautifully decorated glass bottles filled a dark maroon colored liquid. Over them hung a sign saying:

"Your Very Own Cockatrice Blood! Special, Buy One Get One Free!"

            Gourry (who knows HOW) had managed to find his way out of the temple, and was gleefully walking out into the street via the front entrance. He held the bottle in both hands near his chest, more or less the exact same position it was when he first accepted it. His lips, too, were in the same goofy smile. He looked at the sky, estimating that there were still a few more hours before nightfall. He was content with this chronicle observation and for the first time paid attention to where he was walking. Something was amiss.

            Gourry's stride had taken him, literally, over top of the sleeping Not-Zel. The 100% chimera was sprawled out in fetal position, with Gourry's feet centimeters away from disrupting the restful slumber.

Maybe this is the Zelgadis I know, Gourry thought.

Maybe this is a Zelgadis who would beat me into a bloody pulp.

            Not taking a chance, Gourry looked around for anyone to help. Not a soul in sight. Well, he decided to stick it out alone.

            Gourry's first attempt was to slowly shift his body weight onto the foot farthest from the Zel. No dice.

            Failing that, Gourry tried to slide his front foot forward. It worked!... or would have, if his back foot hadn't been jealous and decided to slide backwards.

            Thus we, the audience, find Gourry performing an extremely painful split, his in-seem inches from a sleeping, ill-tempered chimera. In a situation like this, there is little our hero can do but self-reflect.

I am so very f-

            Lina blinked and scratched her head, looking at the many doors. What did I do to deserve this?

            Picking a door at random, Lina walked through it. There was nothing but darkness, save a small light near the end of what looked like a doorway. Walking towards the light, she opened another door and walked into... the same many doored-hall she started from.

"Wha-? I thought I just went in there..."

            Turning around, she walked back in the door, and came out on the other side of the hallway, two doors down.

"Looks like a space warp of some kind."

            That's when she heard it. The other half of the Lina-ette mob which got separated in the cavernous temple. Thousands of feet pounded against the marble floor, speeding towards her. Then came the echoing cries.

"Lina-sama!!"

"Get her!"

"I got dibs on her headband!!"

            Lina sweat-dropped until the first dozen flooded into the hall. Time to make my exit. Opening the closest door, she ran in, leading the Lina-ettes into the maze of space. And if any outsider were to just walk in, they'd see Lina-ettes running from one door to the next in a disorganized fashion, most somehow being able to chase Lina through the maze.

            The Lina-ette that Gourry had collided with was wandering around in sort of a daze until she bumped into six more Lina-ettes. The girls regrouped after their long excursion through the corridors. The others looked at her rather oddly.

"Hey, what's wrong with you?"

"Yah, did you hit your head again?"

            The girl smiled dreamily and nodded.

"Yeah," she said, "I just met this really cute blonde guy...I think I've seen him before."

"Cute blonde guy, huh?" said a Lina-ette with glasses. She thumbed through a highly dog-eared book that she and her friends had just been leafing through and she stopped at a colored page. The glassed one held up the picture of a young blonde man with a goofy grin and armor.

"That him?"

"Yah! That's the guy! Who is he?" The girl leaned closer to read the text on the accompanying page. It was headed by large print saying "GOURRY GABRIEV."

            The girl almost fainted.

"You mean that was Gourry?!? THE Gourry Gabriev!?!?"

            The other Lina-ettes started to get excited!

"Where is he?"

"I dunno!"

"Where did you see him last?"

"Over there, in that hallway. He went left!"

"Well, let's go then!"

            The Lina-ettes found new strength and tore down the hall way with breakneck speed until at the far end of a hallway, they caught sight of a seven-foot blonde swordsmen, his back to them.

"GOURRY-SAMA!"

            Gourry, who was performing the splits over the snoozing one, heard the fearsome but increasingly familiar sound of teenage girls stampeding.

            The girls surged through the temple entrance. They paused for one moment, checking one final time to see the illustration matched.

"It IS!" the Lina-ette with glasses screams out. "It's Gourry 'the Blue Thunder' Gabriev!!!"

            Before Gourry could ask himself where he had gained a nickname like that, he was engulfed by the mob and dragged to the other side of the street. He violently gestured for the girls to be quiet, pointing to the sleeping Not-Zelgadis in the middle of the street. The girls fell silent and slowly turn their heads to the chimera.

            Not-Zelgadis, who had been sleeping quite deeply, was no longer resting so peacefully. He was still asleep, but he began to toss and turn slightly (a side effect of being trampled on.) He jabbed his elbow into a rock that was poking his side; the rock crumbled.

            Gourry and the Lina-ettes held their breath, praying that the elegant monster would stay asleep.

            The Lina-ettes stared in awe at the snoring, drooling pile in the road. The Lina-ette with the glasses checked her book for a minute. Behind Gourry's portrait was another bright illustration of a blue-skinned bishonen with short purple hair....

"Its ZELGADIS GREYWORDS!"
"AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
"ZEL-SAMA!"

            The girls regrouped and abandoned the bewildered Gourry, deciding to pounce on the supine Not-Zel!

            Filia couldn't contain her surprise when she saw another bottle of Cockatrice Blood in front of her. She gaped at Brother Rimmour.

"Another bottle? But how is it possible? I thought Zelgadiss had stolen the only one."

            Rezo stormed down the hall, a dark shadow cast before him. At a distance, his incoherent muttering would sound very much like growling. He stopped his march at a large chamber with six doors. No one. Damn.

            Rezo walked to the far side of the chamber and was about to open the door when he heard feet running on the marble floor behind him. He turned around, but only managed to perceive a door closing.

            After listening intently for a minute, Rezo faced forward again and clasped the doorknob. Again, he heard a door opening, footsteps, and a door closing. This time, Rezo even thought he heard giggling.

            Slowly, ever so slowly, Rezo floated across the room to the door that'd just been closed. Cautiously, his fingers coiled around the handle. He was moments away from opening it, when behind him he heard three pairs of feet running and two doors closing. Quickly, Rezo turned about-face, yet again absolutely sure there was someone in the hall.

            A frustrated smile crossed Rezo's face and he moved to the far side one final time. At a single, almost inaudible creak of a door-latch, Rezo Ray-winged across the room in seconds, throwing the door wide open with his staff. The priest had not even needed to speak the words of the raywing spell; 'twas second nature to him.

            But now it was someone else's turn to cast a spell.

"FIREBALL!!"

            The orb of flame scattered apart inches from the Red Priest's face. Rather than vanish, the tongues of flames began to orbit him, casting him in a blood-red glow that flickered as he spoke.

"Lina Inverse."

            Rimmour turned to Filia with a grin as he stood in front of an entire shelf full of bottles.

"They're fakes!" he said very matter-of-factly.

"The one that the Red Priest had was the real one...I think. I stole it during the fight of those three odd-looking chaps.... to prevent it being used for evil," he figured Filia would buy that. "But there have been a couple of these fakes floating around," he said, patting the bottle in front of him.

"They were a botched attempt at selling 'bottled Djedoran surprise.' It never caught on, strangely. And, since this temple needed funds... I sold them as Cockatrice blood.

            Filia wasn't following. Rimmour didn't care.

            "How this relates to that Mazoku Namagomi, you ask? Well, we'll just give him a fake one, and then get the real one from your friends! I'm the last person Xellos saw with the bottle, and how will he know it's fake, anyway? In truth, no one really knows what Cockatrice blood really does. There have been theories, speculations, and actual tests, but the results are never the same twice, and some tests even revealed it to be lethal! For all we know, it could be a floor cleaner and desert topping in one! So, What do you think?"

            He grinned expectantly at Filia.... but didn't wait for her answer.

"How do we get a hold of that bastich, anyway?"

            The skinny scarecrow-of-a-priest shrugged and then started bellowing:

"XEEEEEEEEEEEELLOS! WHERE ARE YOU? WE GIVE UP! XEEEEEEEEEEEEELLOS!"

"behind you," said a voice next to Rimmour's ear.

            Rimmour jumped and whirled around to face the floating figure of a rather smug Xellos.

"(just play along,)" Rimmour managed to whisper to Filia.

            Xellos was hovering over the slightly cowering figure of the 'Honorable Brother Rimmour,' who had just drawn a curtain over a nearby shelf very hastily.... and the repulsed Filia...

"Giving up? Why, Filia, I knew the dragons were stupid, but I didn't know they were cowards! Rimmour I can understand, but I would've at least expected YOU to damage some more property first."

            However, instead of chortling out loud, he only smirked before turning dead serious, his violet eyes boring into Rimmour.

"So... thought we were pretty clever, huh? Stealing from a Mazoku. Congratulations, I didn't think it could be done, but here's the proof. So, after this amazing achievement...what is making you give up?"

            Rimmour's face went from ashen to bright red.

"Because... quite frankly, you scare the S*** out of me."

            Xellos burst into playful laughter. His mood lightened a bit.

"Just for that, I won't kill you!" he said in a lower voice.

            Rimmour looked is if he wanted to hide. He withdrew a bottle from his robes and handed it to Xellos. Rimmour then cleared his throat and bowed respectively. Xellos raised his eyebrows.

"We BOTH want to apologize, and beg your forgiveness. We know which side to take NOW...."

            Rimmour seemed to be waiting for something.

"ISN'T THAT RIGHT, MISS FILIA...?" he said through gritted teeth.

            Xellos and Rimmour both looked expectantly at Filia.

"Filia, is there something you would like to say?" asked Xellos in faux politeness.

            He was enjoying every minute of this.

"I... I..."

            Filia knew that she was supposed to agree with what Rimmour was saying, but she just couldn't say it. What's the matter with you, Filia? she asked herself. What's wrong with lying to that Mazoku namagomi? Just let him enjoy himself, for a while... you'll get the last laugh later.

            She gritted her teeth and nodded.

"Yes. What he says is true... even though I hate to admit it..."

            Lina had been accidentally gotten lost while running from her adoring fans. It wasn't until somebody, or something, had stuck itself in the door that she was running into when she'd lost her temper.

"FIREBALL!"

            She stopped to look at her victim and gasped as her name rolled off the tongue of Rezo. It made her want to cut him in half with a Laguna Blade. But she didn't. Instead, she straightened her back.

"Rezo."

            The Rezo took a step backwards, allowing Lina to step into the hall. Lina expected him to blow the city apart... expected him to turn into a ten-story monster...

            She didn't expect him to sigh.

"You have so much potential," he said to her without even looking. "I have always believed that, Lina Inverse. You have the makings of this world's greatest spellcaster. And what do you do with it?"

            Rezo turned, his form scaling over her. With each word, Rezo bit the air with contempt.

            "You WASTE it by running around, kingdom to kingdom, accompanied by idiots and copies. If you only allied yourself with the previous Rezos or myself, you could shape this continent into a Utopia. But NO, that would interrupt your MEALS! The only thing driving you on is bland food and worthless currency."

"The greatest potential in the world..." he said softly.

            Rezo took one step closer, leaving Lina completely in shadow.

"... reduced to this."

            Xellos was speechless.

            ...it didn't last long.

"And I thought you were pathetic BEFORE! I must say, Filia, what little respect I had for you has dwindled own to almost nothing now... not that you'd have missed it."

            He looked at the bottle that was now in his hands and frowned a little.

"Hmm. How do I know this is the real thing? I should make one of you try it and watch what happens for my amusement." He started to advance on Rimmour. "Open wide," he said devilishly.

            Rimmour cowered against the adjacent wall and looked up in terror at the advancing Xellos. He shook his head, refusing to open his mouth.

            Xellos jabbed Rimmour in the stomach with his staff and laughed gleefully. A Machiavellian light shown in his, now wide open, eyes.

            Rimmour gasped in pain and his mouth opened wide like a dying fish. Xellos seized Rimmour by the sides of his face and uncorked the bottle with his free hand and his teeth. He slowly raised the bottle to Rimmour's lips, which were turning purple. Just as the dark liquid was at the very edge of the bottle and about to tumble into Rimmour's mouth, Xellos jerked back the bottle and let go of the "Honorable Brother's" face.

"Ha! Psyched you out! Like I would waste any of this on you!"

            And with that he "shah'd" out of the gift shoppe, leaving a still-stunned Rimmour and Filia... and an echoing laughter.

            Rimmour was regaining his breath when a half-pained grin spread across his face. Filia was sure to like him now! Just look at a how brave he was! He faced uncertain death at the hands of a Mazoku with a volatile substance- no, wait... it was just Djedoran Surprise... he had forgotten. Oh well... he'd say it was just really good acting! That's it!

"That....(gasp)....oughtta show....(wheeze)...show that bast-" cough. "that...(pant)...Xello-(ow)-llohhhhh..."

            Between the excitement of the day (and getting hit in the stomach by a staff going 70mph,) Rimmour's body had had enough and shut down for now. His chin was now resting on Filia's feet and his rump was high in the air.

            Filia nudged Rimmour off her foot with ill-concealed disgust. This sniveling worm had just made her reduce herself to his level, and in front of Xellos, no less. It was no wonder that she felt very little pity for him.

"Oh, great. What am I going to do with him now? I'm certainly not going to lug his heavy carcass anywhere. But if I leave him here like this... Oh, whatever!!"

            Filia peevishly grabbed hold of one of Rimmour's foot and dragged him back into the garishly colored Alchemy temple antechamber. Placing him on the floor, she dusted her hands and looked around.

"He should be safe enough here. Meanwhile, I shall go back to the other temple to look for Lina... and whoever has that Cockatrice Blood."

"And why am I talking to myself?"

            Filia rolled her eyes towards the ceiling and shrugged, then walked back towards the Temple of Restoration.

            Lina listened in silence as Rezo let loose one insult after another. She may be the bandit-killer, but she wouldn't hit a blind man. (Wait a sec... was he even blind??) She gained a smirk at his calling her superior to the world in her magic, ignoring the fact that conquering it would be held back by food.

"Of COURSE I could conquer the world. But why would I want to do that? I'm happy with who and what I am. Ruling the world would make me have to settle down and get married. And THAT'S not on my to-do list."

            She put her hands on her small hips semi-defiantly, not giving into Rezo's small advantage in height.

"Besides, why would I want to join up with a third-rate mage anyway?"

"If you are perfectly happy the way you are now...." Rezo said angrily, his grip on the staff extremely tight.

"...then you can just DIE happy!!!!!"

            Rezo outstretched his left hand, pulled back his arm and hurled a melon-sized Fireball spell at her.

            Gourry, who was bangs-deep in Lina-ettes, turned around at a familiar-but-unwelcome sound. He saw a portion of the roof to the Temple of Rejuvination fly off with explosive force, followed by smoke and licks of flame. Gourry's jovial expression soured slightly, but the Lina-ettes continued to surge over him and Zel.

            Gazing fearfully at the smoke curl escaping from the black structure, Gourry started to wade through the Lina-ettes...

            ...only to trip over Not-Zelgadis.

            Lina sat up, rubbing her smoking head. As much as she hated it, he had gotten a good shot off of her. They had been about five feet apart, and a fireball of that size was not that easy to dodge at that distance. Now she was mad. Nobody got a lick off her without paying with their lives.

            Getting to her feet, Lina took a few extra steps back. She was just finishing a spell, both hands in front of herself.
"Bomb Di Wind !!"

            A powerful push of air kicked out from her palms, nearly pushing her back a few more steps.

"Vas Gluudo," Rezo called out, blocking the bulk of the blast with the barrier. Even with the temporary shield, Rezo was forced to shield his face with his sleeve.

"And so the battle begins..."

End of Episode #4

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