Me And My Monkey

Robbie Williams

It was me and my monkey 
And with his dungarees and roller blades 
Smokin' filtered tips, 
Reclining in the passenger seat of my super-charged 
Jet-black Chevrolet 
He had the soft top down 
He liked the wind in his face 
He said, "Son, you ever been to Vegas." 
I said, "No." 
He said, "That's where we're gonna go. 
You need a change of pace." 

And when we hit the strip 
With all the wedding chapels and the neon signs 
He said, "I left my wallet in El Segundo." 
And proceeded to take two grand of mine 

We made tracks to the Mandalay Bay Hotel 
Asked the bellboy if he'd take me and my monkey as 
well 
He looked into the passenger seat of my car 
And with a smile he said, 
"If your monkey's got that kind of money, sir 
Then we've got a monkey bed" 

Me and my monkey 
With a dream and a gun 
I'm helpin' my monkey 
Don't point that gun at anyone 
Me and my monkey, like Butch and the Sundance Kid 
Tryin' to understand why he did what he did 
Why he did what he did 

And at the elevator 
I hit the 33rd floor 
He had a room up top with the panoramic views 
Like nothing you've ever seen before 

He went asleep in the bidet 
And when he awoke 
He ran his little monkey fingers through the yellow 
pages 
Called up escort services and ordered some 
Okie Doke 

Forty minutes later, 
There came a knock at the door 
In walked this big, bad-ass baboon into my bedroom 
With three monkey whores 

"Hi, my name is Sunshine 
These are my girls 
Lace my palm with silver, baby 
Oh yeah, and then I'll rock your world" 

So, I watched pay-per-view 
And polished my shoes and my gun 
Was diggin' on Kurt Cobain sing about Lithium 
There came a knock at the door and in walked Sunshine 

"What's up?" 
"You'd better get you ass in here, boy 
Your monkey's havin' too much of a good time" 

Me and my monkey 
Drove in search of the sun 
Me and my monkey 
Don't point that gun at anyone 
Me and my monkey 
Like Billy the Kid 
Tryin' to understand 
Why he did what he did 
Why he did what he did 

Got tickets to see Sheena Easton 
The monkey was high 
Said it was a burnin' ambition to see her 
Before he died 
We left before encores 
He couldn't sit still 
Sheena was a blast, baby 
But my monkey was ill 

When I played blackjack 
Kept hittin' 23 
Couldn't help but notice 
This Mexican just starin' at me 
Now was it my monkey 
I couldn't be sure 
It's not like he'd ever seen a monkey in roller blades 

And dungarees before 

Now don't test my patience 
'Cause we're not about to run 
That's a bad ass monkey, baby 
And he's packin' a gun 
"My name is Rodriguez," he says 
With death in his eye 
"I've been chasin' you for a long time amigos 
And now your monkey's gonna die" 

Me and my monkey 
Drove in search of the sun 
Me and my monkey 
We don't wanna kill no Mexican 
But we've got 
Ten antsy fingers and walked into the kill 
When the monkey is high 
You do not stare, 
You do not stare 

You do not stare 

Looks like we got ourselves a Mexican stand-off here, 
boy 
And I ain't about to run 
Put your gun down boy 
How did I get mixed up with this fuckin' monkey anyhow