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Insights
& Confessions of a Confused, Rambling Soul (hanging
by a thin thread of steel.) |
Eluded
by any comprehensible way
to express and understand
what I feel tonight,
from my scattered, rambling thoughts,
I can separate this:
I've never
been this happy
but I've never felt so sad...
I've never wanted to cry
as much as I do tonight,
but this ripping, aching I feel
brings me so much joy
that I find myself laughing
as I invite the pain to kiss my ass.
Truth has
never seemed so far away.
But as I open my eyes,
I find it's all there in front of me.
And I never thought I could climb
from this endless apathy...
this eternal hole, void of emotion,
but as the love for those I hate fills me,
this rock-hard, ice-barrier that protects my fragile heart
melts away... and I am gently lifted out of myself
by vulnerabilities I believed would be
the death of me.
I have never
in my life felt so confused...
and things have never been this clear.
I am hanging by a very thin thread.
Yes, a thread made of steel...
that will never, never break
or let me fall.
And yet,
I have never been as afraid
as I am tonight...
Overwhelmed by the strength
to move on.
