If anyone happens to read this, which I doubt as the popularity of this website has continued to decrease with time, they might happen to think that I am weirder than I really am. Maybe they will think that dedicating one whole page just to a girl that I am dating is pretty weird, especially since we have only gone on one date. Still, there are things that need to be said. First, the typical stereotype of a guy from a girl is that they want to avoid relationships, and just try out the waters instead. Plus, I have always stereotyped girls as having secret crushes that they would talk about at a slumber party, and they would just die thinking about some cute guy or whatever. However, I am seeing more and more that this is not true. I have always looked at any relationship with a girl as something that I planned to be long term. That is, I have always been looking to get into a relationship. Many of my friends are somewhat opposite, instead wanting to see exactly what it is that they like, and what they can't stand. Anyway, I have come to a very confusing point in my life right now. Kind of like an identity crisis. I am trying to figure out exactly what I am and why I am that way. Specifically, what do I want out of life, what girls do I really like and why do I like them, and what I am even doing here. I guess I always thought that I was motivated by things that I dont feel like I am motivated by now. For instance, I always thought that the reason I worked hard in school and cared about my grades was to make a lot of money and have success and power and prestige when I get older. Now, I realize that those things don't matter to me, they never have. I am just motivated, but I really dont know what for. As to girls, I always thought that I wanted the supermodel girl, or some girl that would just fall in love with me at first sight. But what exactly is that supposed to mean. I think that I have learned that it isn't going to happen. But, is that a bad thing? See, that I dont know. Anyway, I guess I will just have to keep exploring until I find exactly what it is that I am looking for.