Mickey Shades: We’re here outside the Hangover headquarters in Fargo, awaiting the arrival of one Rob Ulmer, the owner and President of the WCF. I was sent to ask him a few questions about the WCF itself and its future. I want to…wait, a vehicle has pulled up to the curb now, let’s…wait a second…
~The camera sees a taxi has pulled up. But nonetheless, President Ulmer steps out and hands the cab driver some money before straightening his jacket and walking to the building, being stopped by Mickey.~
Mickey Shades: Hold on a second, Mr. Ulmer. You’re the president of the entire World Championship Federation, and you had to take a cab to the debut?
Rob Ulmer:: I have bills to pay. The WCF itself has bills to pay. A few years ago the WCF was rolling in money. Well, during the fourth run of the WCF, the Presidents title was given to me. I looked, and, well, they apparently weren’t rolling in it. They had about $100,000 dollars, which isn’t a whole lot considering some federations today are worth billions. But being the little devil I was, I didn’t care. I didn’t plan on being President too long, so I spent as I felt. The fifth WCF run came, and I was still President. We earned a little profit on WCF5, but not much. My other business deal flopped, and the WCF wasn’t worth enough for people to even consider taking from me! So here I am, still the damn President going into WCF6. Guess how much money we have. Guess.
Mickey Shades: I…I don’t know.
Rob Ulmer:: No, take a swing at it, c’mon.
Mickey Shades: I’d guess, I dunno, 75 grand?
Rob Ulmer:: Try $10,000. That’s pocket change. But think about it. The WCF has opened and closed five times in its history. It hasn’t been open long enough for any of those to turn a profit. We do nothing but spend and spend for those “grand debuts” only to spend and spend for those “grand closings” a month later. So we’ve cut back a tad on the fancy crap those bigger feds do. But the wrestlers’ entrances can do whatever the hell they want. They’re paying for that, not us.
Mickey Shades: On that note, what are you going to do to try and raise the image of the WCF? Because, I’m probably not the first to say this, but the WCF isn’t exactly a five-star fed.
Rob Ulmer:: You’re right, Mickey, it’s not. And I don’t intend to turn it into one by next week. It’s a slow process Mickey, so we’re gonna have to take it slow.
Mickey Shades: So you’re saying you’re actually committed to the WCF this time around?
Rob Ulmer:: I won’t lie to you; my resume is pretty poor right now. Two botched fed runnings is pretty much it. I intend to keep this going for a long time, earn it some money and me some money so I can get the hell out of here, retire, and live in Cancun the rest of my days.
Mickey Shades: That’s a ways away. Let’s talk about tonight. What’s with the card? OutKast and Death Syndrome had formed a temporary tag team, yet they’re fighting eachother tonight, Dauragon and OutKast have some heat between them, yet they’re not fighting eachother. What gives?
Rob Ulmer:: This is our debut. Alliances mean nothing, rivalries are ignored. Tonight, we’re doing this how I want it done.
Mickey Shades: Do you have anything planned tonight that’s of any importance?
Rob Ulmer:: Tonight? Tonight is important enough being the “Grand Debut” but let me tell you. Next week on Hangover, I have something of importance. Next week.
~Rob hand-combs his hair and walks into the building. The camera goes back to Mickey.~
Mickey Shades: The President, Rob Ulmer, with those words.
~“Superstar” hits as Hangover’s intro plays. When it ends, the camera cuts to inside the Fargodome scanning the crowd as what appears to be lots and lots of confetti is released onto the stage and rampway. The screen cuts to the announcers table where the team of Less Moore and Wayne Maloney are situated.~
Less Moore: Nearly 18,000 people have packed into the Fargodome here tonight! This is sure to be one hell of an event as we debut for the first time ever, Hangover!
Wayne Maloney: That’s right. The WCF has changed it’s appearance and shows, as the days of Sunday Rage and Thursday Revenge are now over! It’s Saturday night, and what happens Saturday night? Hangover!
Less Moore: Actually, if we’re going for accuracy, we should be “Sunday Morning Hangover.”
Wayne Maloney: …Sunday Morning Hangover? Dude. Just…dude. That’s why you’re not on the creative board like I am. Hangover was actually my idea!
Less Moore: I’m sure it was. As you can see by our, ahem, pyro…
Wayne Maloney: Or lack thereof.
Less Moore: Or lack thereof, we’re not the rich money-spending-like-rabbits company we once were. No, we’ve taken it down a notch, but the excitement is still there!
Wayne Maloney: Just cheaper excitement. Like the kind you’d usually get on a Saturday night.
Less Moore: Seriously shut up with those puns. It’s time for our first match where OutKast, Greed, and Death Syndrome all take on eachother in a Triple Threat Match!
~"Not Enough" hits. And a Red Pyro shoots out of the stage~
Mickey Shades: This first match in the debut of World Championship Wrestling’s Hangover, weighing in at 165 pounds, OutKast!
~OutKast appears on the stage as the lights come on....He walks slowly down to the ring taunting the fans and urging them on. OutKast slides into the ring and Poses ala Matt Hardy~
Mickey Shades: And his opponent, weighing in at 290 pounds, from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, Greed!
~The lights go out and green strobes appear with money symbol. “Money Ain’t a Thang” hits as Greed make his way to the ring. He climbs into the ring and gets ready. He and OutKast have a small stare down, but don’t touch eachother~
~The crowd is chattering restlessly, when suddenly all the lighting in the arena goes out and complete silence sweeps across like wind. After about ten seconds, the lights suddenly flash on followed by a huge pyrotechnics display and the theme of Ride of Your Life By Neurotica, as Death Syndrome rides out to the ring.~
Mickey Shades: Entering the ring, from Knoxville, Tennessee, weighing in at a huge 320 Pounds, The Virus, Death Syndrome!
~Death walks into the ring and stares at the crowd, looking for signs that appeal to him. He continues to do so until it bores him, so he decides to just test out the ropes and make sure his ring attire's in shape before the match begins~
Less Moore: And here we are, about to start the first match of the new WCF!
*DING, DING, DING*
~The three look at eachother, before OutKast smiles at Death Syndrome, and those two take a quick swipe at Greed, sending him to the mat. Greed quickly gets to his feet, only to get knocked back down with a double closeline. OutKast and Death Syndrome both stomp mercilessly on Greed, before OutKast grabs Greed by the head and lifts him to his feet. He whips Greed into the corner and charges at him, but Greed lifts up his boot, catching OutKast in the face. Before Greed can recover, he is sent over the top rope with a stiff closeline from Death Syndrome. OutKast takes a running start, runs at the ropes, jumps onto the top rope, and with quick agility, jumps to Greed with a missile dropkick on the outside~
Wayne Maloney: Did you see that!? What a move by OutKast.
~OutKast throws Greed into the ring and slides in himself. Death Syndrome lifts Greed to his feet, then hits a hard powerslam to him. Death Syndrome signals for the Black Death, and waits for Greed to get up. When he does, Death Syndrome grabs Greed in a mandible claw hold and lifts him up and slams him down with a one-handed chokeslam. The crowd cheers on Death Syndrome as he goes for the easy pin. But wait! OutKast suddenly grabs Death Syndrome and nails him with the Apocalypse (standing Rock Bottom)! The crowd is in shock as OutKast makes the cover~
1…
2…
3!
Mickey Shades: The winner by pinfall, OutKast!
~”Not Enough” hits as the crowd boos OutKast. OutKast smirks as he has his hand raised in victory~
Less Moore: Wow, I thought OutKast and Death Syndrome had a pretty good partnership going!
Wayne Maloney: Well, they certainly enjoyed teaming together to completely destroy Greed! We might need the paramedics out here!
Less Moore: Greed didn’t have any fight in him at all. He didn’t even try.
Wayne Maloney: Are you kidding? Did you not see that wicket boot he did to the face of OutKast? Impressive!
Less Moore: Quit with the sarcasm.
Wayne Maloney: You’re right, Greed sucked.
Less Moore: I'm hearing now that we've got a new wrestler backstage. I don't know details yet, so stay tuned and we'll let you know.
Wayne Maloney: New wrestler. Hah. Probably a fat slob with no talent. He'll fit right in.
Less Moore: “But first, it seems like were ready to backstage to Mickey Shades who is standing by backstage, Mickey?”
Mickey Shades: “Thanks Less, as you can see I’m here with WCF Vice-President Chen. It’s an honor sir.”
Chen: “It’s a pleasure to be here, and please, skip the formalities Mick.”
Mickey Shades: “no problem sir…er…Chen. Anyways, my first question for you is what brought you back to the WCF?”
Chen: “You see Mickey, it’s simple. I had my humble beginnings in the pro circuit here. I live, breathe, eat, sleep and sleep this company. When I heard President Ulmer was re-opening the WCF I couldn’t resist, I immediately packed my bags and came here.”
Mickey Shades: “But why not wrestle again?”
Chen: “The better question is why? Why would I continue to come back and win the World Title? Why re-accomplish what I’ve already accomplished? I’d much rather let the younger talent who hasn’t gotten their chance to live their dream. There’s a time in every wrestlers life where he has to step down and let another take their place, and that’s exactly what I’m doing Mickey.”
Mickey Shades: “So are you saying that you’ve retired from an active wrestling role?”
Chen: “Not at all Mickey! I’m still an active wrestler in other federations; I’m only 26 for cryin’ out loud! I just felt that I could better in an office, not the squared circle.”
Mickey Shades: “Speaking of which, how exactly did you land the Vice-Presidency position?”
Chen: “A while back President Ulmer called me as the WCF was re-opening asking me if I wanted to rejoin but instead of competing, he asked if I wanted to be Vice-President because he felt I was experienced enough and loyal to the company that I would do well in the position. But if you ask me Mickey, he’s just keeping me for my paycheck.”
Mickey Shades: “What do you mean by that?”
Chen: “Well let’s face it Mickey, after six runs the WCF is a bit short of money. I agreed to take this job for a minimal Salary in comparison to others and well, the pay check I get from my active competing and fan donations is probably about the only thing that allows this company to stay on their feet, but if president Ulmer asks, you didn’t hear it from me, got it?”
Mickey: “Uhmm…this IS live sir…”
Chen: “Uhh…damn…”
Mickey Shades: “So how long do you plan on staying in this position?”
Chen: “As long as I can Mickey, like I said, I live for this company, as long as I don’t get fired or they close, I’ll be right here.”
Mickey Shades: “Any final comments?”
Chen: “I would just like to thank the loyal WCF fans that arrived here tonight because without you the WCF would be nothing. On another note, watch the ring tonight everybody, the WCF is full of surprises. And don’t forget to go to the WCF Merch stand in the main lobby before you go!”
Mickey Shades: “Thank-you for your time Chen.”
Chen: “No problem, you’ll buy one of my shirts right? C’mon the WCF needs money here…BUY IT!!!”
Less Moore: Let’s go to the ring for the second match of the night, a singles contest between Infinite and Shawn Davis.
~The lights go off as the crowd sits in confusion. Remember by Disturbed plays on the PA system. Neon lights flash on and off as the first verse of Remember plays. Highlights of Infinite’s professional wrestling and kickboxing career is shown on the Uber-tron. Out from behind the curtains, Infinite appears, the fans cheer loudly as he glances around the arena. Infinite is wearing a black tee shirt with the Prince symbol in the middle along with black warm up pants that also has the Prince symbol on its side. As Remember is playing on the PA system, Infinite runs on each side of the stage and taunts. The fans cheer even louder as he makes his way down the ramp~
Mickey Shades: On his way to the ring, from Halifax, Nova Scotia, Canada …Weighing at 227 pounds…Infinite!!!
~Infinite continues to walk down the ramp and he walks around the ring and high five numerous fans on the front rows. Infinite stops then slides in the ring. Infinite taunts on each of the turnbuckles in the ring and listens to the fans cheers. After he gets done with his turnbuckle taunts, he runs to each side of the ring and bounce against the ropes~
Mickey Shades: And his opponent, weighing in at 175 pounds, from Toronto, Canada, Shawn Davis!
~”Somewhere I Belong” by Linkin Park plays. Nobody comes down the ramp~
Wayne Maloney: Well? Where’d he go?
Less Moore: No idea… Wait…It was a trick! Here comes Shawn through the crowd! Here he comes! He’s still coming. Still. He’s nearing the barricade now. Infinite is just watching him attempt a sneak attack. The match is about to be underway! Let’s go to a commercial break!
Commercial: Want to experience the thrill of a WCF Hangover like it was meant to be seen? The owners of World Championship Wrestling bring to you “Rob and Chen’s Ultimate Alcoholic Stuff!” It’s got everything you need to enjoy quality television; alcohol, and probably some other stuff! It comes in 2 liters, gallon, and the new family sized 5-gallon! Experience the fun of Hangover now both before AND after you go to bed!
…9
…10!
*DING, DING, DING*
Less Moore: Oh my god, what a finish!
Wayne Maloney: Infinite went to meet Shawn on the ground, but fell on the outside and got his pants caught on a hook holding the apron up. And Shawn is still trying to find the ring! It’s a double count-out!
Less Moore: Well, I've got an update. That new wrestler is coming down to the ring... *pause* RIGHT NOW!
Wayne Maloney: Wait... I think you're right. I can feel the ground shake!
~The crowd hushes as the lights dim. Goldfinger's "Spokesman" begins to play softly. As everybody looks expectantly at the ramp... nothing happens except for the music's volume increasing to a normal level.~
Wayne Maloney: Ha! I bet he's running right now... That's why he's moving at two feet per hour!
~Right as Wayne finishes, pyros explode from both sides of the entrance ramp (Purple on one side, gold on the other) and through the smoke you can just make out the outline of somebody sprinting towards the camera.~
Less Moore: Here he comes!
~The crowd is giving a small pop at this entrance, and a somebody comes out from the smoke, doing a back handspring.~
Less Moore: Excuse me. Here SHE is!
~The crowd goes into a stunned silence for a second (maybe two) but then pops for this new female wrestler. The lights have come back on, and everybody can get a good look at her now. She's a bit taller than average (5'8") and built like a gymnast who has spent some extra time on the weights.~
Wayne Maloney: Wow...
~The figure continues to make her way down to the ring, energetically slapping hands with fans on her way down the ramp while bouncing around like a rabbit on speed. She's dressed more modestly than most women that are around today in wrestling, as she's wearing a purple tank top (with the word 'King' and a crown on the front) and matching tights (with the same design on them). Her brunette hair is tied back in a ponytail, and as she reaches the bottom of the ramp, she breaks into a sprint and slides into the ring (under the bottom rope).~
Less Moore: It's sounding like the fans in Fargo don't mind this new addition to the roster...
Wayne Maloney: NEITHER DO I!
~After pumping up the crowd, the woman gets a microphone from a member of the ring crew and looks around at the audience as her music fades~
Woman: YEAH! FARGO! LET'S HEAR IT FOR THE UPPER MIDWEST!
~Cheap pop~
Less Moore: Looks like the fans love her already.
Woman: You know, I really can't believe I'm here. I'm just out of high school, and all ready I'm in the ring! It's like I'm dreaming or something. I mean, I had wanted my debut to be in Minnesota, but I'd say this is close enough, right?
~pop~
Wayne Maloney: I don't know, I think she ought to get a bit closer, if you know what I mean.
Woman: I'm glad that you all love a hometown, meat and potatoes type of girl. But I'm sorry that I'll have to ignore all of you while I talk to all of the guys backstage.
~The woman shakes her head and looks right into the nearest camera~
Woman: I know that you're all watching. You all want to know who this new wrestler is. You all want to know whether or not you should be scared. Let me tell all of you something. All of you should be scared. Lisa King has arrived in the WCF, and I don't plan on sitting around. I'm here for one purpose, and one purpose only. I'm here to WRESTLE.
~pop~
Wayne Maloney: She must be a blonde under that dye. THIS IS A WRESTLING FEDERATION, of course you're here to wrestle!
Lisa: I'm here to get in the ring with any of you back there, and to come out victorious. It won't be easy. Death Syndrome, Dauragon, Shade, you're all big guys, it'll take work to come out on top. I know that I'll have to work to get anywhere in this fed. That I'll have to overcome the lowered expectations of me. Am I a girl? No, I'm a woman. Am I like the other woman wrestlers you see on TV? The ones who just prance around in their lingerie, fawn over men and worry about breaking their nails? No. What you see here is what you get. I'm not coming out here in a bra and thong set. There probably are some good looking guys backstage, but that's not why I'm here. And worry about breaking my nails? The only thing I'm worried about breaking is someone's back after I lock on the Crown Jewels. I'm sure that the big shots are watching backstage, and they had better understand exactly what I mean.
~Lisa tosses the microphone to the ring crewman, and slides out of the ring as 'Spokesman' plays~
Less Moore: Well that was...
Wayne Maloney: Exciting.
Less Moore: I have to agree. She's very charismatic.
Wayne Maloney: That's not what I meant Less.
Less Moore: Huh?
Wayne Maloney: Just think about it...
Less Moore: *with a moan* Oh man, I should have known that's all you're thinking about
Wayne Maloney: Can I help it?
Less Moore: Yes, but that’s not the point. It is now time for our last match of the evening!
Mickey Shades: Ladies and gentlemen, it’s time for the WCF MAIN EVENT! It is a singles contest, and entering first, hailing from Cardiff, Wales, weighing in at 217 pounds, SHADE!
~Small wisps of smoke rise up from the turnbuckles as the lights in the arena fade. "The God That Failed" blasts through the building as a weak spotlight falls on the emerging Shade. Slowly he walks to the ring, completely focused, raising his arm on the apron before entering the ring~
Mickey Shades: And his opponent, weighing in at 245 pounds, DAURAGON!
~"Whisper" by Evanescence hits the PA system as the arena goes dark. The crowd remains silent as two huge turbine engines whirl on the side of the rampway as Dauragon stands at the top. White lights shoot up from underneath Dauragon as he walks. Every time he steps, light shines on the rampway, imitating his every step. He walks down to the ring and walks up the steel stairs and steps inside the squared circle. He removes his robe and glares at Shade~
Less Moore: Here we go!
~The two circle eachother, then lock up. Shade gets the upperhand as he whips Dauragon into the ropes and hits a belly-to-belly suplex. Both men get up and Dauragon hits a legsweep. He runs into the ropes and Shade leapfrogs over him as he returns, but Shade hits a devastating superkick as Dauragon comes back~
Wayne Maloney: Oh momma, that has to hurt!
~Shade picks him up and throws Dauragon into the corner. Dauragon dodges away from the charging Shade, then hitting a bulldog onto Shade. Dauragon goes for the Dawn of Fate (lionsault), but Shade slides away and leaves the ring. He composes himself out there, and soon slides back in, only to be attacked by a baseball slide by Dauragon. Dauragon picks Shade up. Shade punches Dauragon’s gut, and Shade whips him into the ropes. Dauragon attempts a spinning DDT coming back, but Shade powers out of it and turns it into a spinebuster~
Less Moore: Dauragon went for the Dragon Spiral, but it backfired on him!
~Shade climbs the top rope and appears to be going for a moonsault, but Dauragon lifts his knees. As Shade is holding his stomach in pain, Dauragon tackles him. Dauragon once again goes for the Dawn of Fate, but this time connects. He goes for a cover, but only gets two. Angry at this, Dauragon lifts Shade up to his feet and goes for a DDT and connects~
Less Moore: Uh oh, Shade is losing it!
~Again, Dauragon picks up Shade, throwing him to the ropes…no, he keeps hold of his arm, bringing Shade back right into a closeline! Dauragon poses for a quick second, then stomps on Shade. Shade slowly gets up and attempts another superkick but Dauragon catches his leg. He spins Shade’s leg around, only to get nailed with a superkick from the other leg~
Wayne Maloney: Wow, quick thinking on the part of Shade!
Less Moore: Shade seems to be getting back his momentum!
~Shade gets up and follows up his comeback with an inverted spinning neckbreaker~
Less Moore: The Darkener! The Darkener!
Wayne Maloney: Calm down there, buddy! Don’t strain yourself!
~The crowd is cheering for Shade as he makes a cover~
1…
~An explosion occurs on the ring, making Shade get up from the pinfall. He looks at the stage in a confused manner, when suddenly a man jumps him from behind~
Less Moore: It's Pyro! That's Pyro, and he's attacking Shade!
Wayne Maloney: What's he doing here? Is he in the WCF?
~Pyro whips Shade into the corner and hits a closeline. Pyro stands on the second rope and lifts Shade up. He puts his head between his legs and lifts Shade up, nailing his finisher, a Tiger Bomb from the second rope~
Less Moore: I remember that move, the Burnout! He just layed waste to Shade, who almost had the victory. Just listen to this crowd, they hate Pyro for that!
Wayne Maloney: Well, he makes his debut by interferring in the main event, I'd be pissed if I was either Shade OR Dauragon!
Less Moore: Well, either way, we have a few seconds left, so we saw Hangover’s grand debut, including a few moments with the President and Vice President, the WCF’s first ever female wrestler, Lisa King, and the debut of the former WCF World Champion, Pyro! It’s only been one night, what's in store for the weeks to come? Stay tuned till next week!
~We view Pyro giving an evil smirk as he leaves the ring to the immense booing of the fans. The cameras go black~