Toy Talk
Volume XXXV

By Mark Patraw
Posted on 4/7/14

In this installment of Toy Talk, moving left-to-right, we have: a 2012 Marvel/M.I.I. Incredible Hulk figurine (fifty cents on 3/19/14); a Blue Police Officer action figure of unknown origin (twenty-five cents "boys dudes" grab bag on 3/19/14); a Seymour Mann, Inc. Motorized Musical Jester doll (one dollar on 4/2/14); a 2008 Madame Alexander/McDonald's The Wizard of Oz Wicked Witch of the West doll (fifty cents on 4/2/14); and, finally, a 2010 Viacom/McDonald's iCarly Customizable Dog (an item in one of the two twenty-five cents "girls" grab bags I bought on 3/14/14). I purchased everything from the Ishpeming St. Vincent de Paul Society thrift store on the dates noted above. If anyone reading this knows more information about any of these items (particularly the police officer or jester doll), that I haven't already discussed below, and would like to share, or just chat about toys, feel free to e-mail me and let me know!

"Stupid camera flash hurts Hulk's eyes! Stop taking pictures or Hulk smash you!" Here we have a 2012 Marvel/M.I.I. Incredible Hulk figurine. At the top of his raised fist, Hulk stands 4.2" (10.6 cm) tall. As a static piece, there's no articulation/poseability, but, thankfully, the pose is a dynamic one and the sculpt/paint are both well done. Design-wise, this is very much "classic" Hulk from the Silver Age of comic books. His green flesh has some subtle air-brushed shadows, to accentuate the musculature, while the rest of the paintwork (jeans, hair, eyes, and teeth) is all done is solid colors. There are also some noticeable seams, at the shoulders and waist, where the different parts of the figure were assembled (the pose is too complex to get out of a mold in one solid piece), but, otherwise, everything flows together well and has a consistent look.

The black, rounded-rectangular base is very spartan in appearance, but its simplicity contrasts nicely with the figure. In addition to the copyright information, "Incredible Hulk" is sculpted, in large, raised letters, on the underside of the stand, in case you don't know, or forget, who he is (which is pretty unlikely).

The thrift store had a similar Iron Man figurine for sale, at the same price, the day that I bought the Hulk. While I like the character, I didn't think that the armored Tony Stark statue was up to the same level of quality as Bruce, so, I left him there. Hulk concurred with my decision: "Leave tin can guy on shelf! Iron Man thinks he's smarter than Hulk!"

While this piece certainly can't compete with a larger, and more expensive, polystone or resin bust/statue, for what it is, this Hulk figurine is very well done, and, on the upside, due to the all-plastic construction, it's less likely to break if you happen to drop it (I think the base would crack before the figure did). All-in-all, I'm pleased to add this rendition of the Green Goliath to my ever-growing Hulk collection.

Sometimes the Man in Blue takes that nickname too literally. This is an action figure of a police officer, molded completely from blue plastic, of unknown origins. There isn't a date or copyright mark of any kind on his body, not even "Made in China", so, your guess is as good as mine as to when this toy was produced and by whom. I'd speculate that it's a cheap dollar store item, but who knows? Officer Bluebody has five points of articulation: rotating cut joints at the neck, shoulders, and hips. The joints are fairly loose, but they do hold a pose and he can stand unassisted. The two halves of his torso are joined together with a couple of metal screws. I disassembled him, in the vain hope that there would be some copyright information molded inside, but, no such luck. The cop's sculpt is pretty good. There's a fair amount of detail in his uniform, including wrinkles and creases in the fabric, and he's even sporting a fuzzy mustache. Artifacts from the molding process are glaringly obvious, particularly on the backside of the figure, but, what can you do? His right hand has a cylindrical hole in it, presumably to hold an accessory, with a nightstick or billy club being the most likely candidate. At the top of his cap, he stands 5.2" (13.3 cm) tall.

The blue police officer is pretty basic, as far as action figures go, but he's not bad for what he is. I like to think of him as a super-sized version of the smaller, unarticulated cop figurines that you can sometimes find, which are very similar to little green/tan army men. This guy would make a fun gag gift, or cake topper, for someone that works in the law enforcement profession.

Have you heard the joke about the guy who wastes all of his money on secondhand junk from thrift stores? This is a Seymour Mann, Inc. Motorized Musical Jester doll. I wasn't able to identify it, so I don't know the character's name, if any, or its production date. There's some copyright data on the back of the figure's neck, but it's nearly impossible to read, because the clothing glued to the doll covers most of it up, and I don't want to risk damaging the paint by prying the fabric free. I'm not sure if this toy is supposed to represent a boy or a girl; it could be either, but I'm leaning towards male, so, that's what I'm going to refer to him as from now on. He clocks in at 11.4" (28.9 cm) in height, although, obviously, the pillow and jester's hat contribute significantly to that measurement.

How could anybody resist that face? I sure couldn't.

The Jester's head and lower limbs appear to be made out of porcelain, or something similar, and would probably be easy to damage if dropped or handled carelessly. The hands and feet are just a uniform flesh tone, but the facial features are very well painted, with lifelike lips and blush on the cheeks. The rich-brown, side-glancing eyes are inset (I'm not sure if they're glass or plastic) and the upper lashes are real projections, not painted on elements like the lower ones. As I indicated before, the clothing is glued to the doll, so, I can't say too much about what's going on underneath them, but, from squeezing the doll, it feels like there's only a mechanical armature inside, surrounded by padding. Of course, given that the body is motorized, which requires flexibility in the materials, that's no big surprise. Likewise, the pillow base has a hard plastic rectangle, underneath the stuffing, with four "leg" posts on the bottom to provide stability.

The Jester's outfit is simply exquisite. The fabric patterns/hues are somewhat subdued and somber (for a court clown that is), which I think looks much better than the more traditional garish arrangement of colors. The variety exhibited in the cut/texture/finish of the garments is also impressive. I particularly like that they made his three-tailed hat huge, in comparison to the doll's head, as that adds a comical flair, and increases the cuteness factor enormously.

When activated, this doll cycles through several cheerful tunes (none of which I recognize) and its upper body and arms slowly rock and gesture to the music while it plays. The feature is powered by two AA batteries, which are housed inside a compartment on the underside of the pillow base, concealed by a velcro flap. A simple ON/OFF switch, next to said compartment, controls things (instead of lifting the figure up and turning him upside down to access the mechanism, I think squeezing him, or pressing a button on his outfit somewhere, would have been a more convenient option for activating the doll). Unfortunately, I don't have the means/equipment to shoot a video with sound, otherwise I'd show you the figure in action. I primarily bought this Jester based on his adorable appearance, but the electronic feature certainly enhances the product. I sometimes criticize shops for this-or-that, but I will give the Ishpeming St. Vincent de Paul Society thrift store props for always checking to see if their electronic stuff is functional or not (they put an "ok" sticker on it if it works or an "as-is" label if it doesn't or they can't tell). When I saw the "ok" decal on this little guy's left calf, I knew that he'd perform fine when I got home and stuck some batteries in him, and sure enough, he did.

I was surprised that the thrift store was only selling this for a buck--given the size and quality of the piece, and lack of any damage/flaws, it's the kind of thing that I'd expect to see at least a $3-4 price tag on (of course, I wouldn't have paid that much, because I'm a cheapskate). Brand new, I'd guess that this item had to cost at least $15-20, and possibly more. However, while I wasn't able to identify this particular figure (and not for lack of trying), the general consensus online seems to be that most Seymour Mann dolls aren't valuable, so, this little jester probably isn't worth much more than the dollar I paid.

In summary, he's a really attractive display piece that I'd recommend to anyone who fancies this type of doll. My only complaint, and it's a small one, is that the Jester has a tendency to lean to its left, instead of sitting straight, but that's probably a result of the figure's weight, and where he "freezes" when you turn him off, more than anything else.

I'll get you, and your little toy-chewing dog too! Actually, it's one of our cats that likes to chew on my toys, not the dog, but what kind of witch picks on felines? This is a 2008 Madame Alexander/McDonald's The Wizard of Oz Wicked Witch of the West doll. In addition to this emerald-skinned villainess, the assortment also included Dorothy (with Toto in a basket), Glinda the Good Witch, a Flying Monkey, the Cowardly Lion, a Winkie Guard, the Tin Man, the Scarecrow, a Flowerpot Munchkin, a Lullaby Munchkin, a Lollipop Munchkin, and the Wizard himself. That was actually the second time that this doll was released, as McDonald's and Madame Alexander collaborated to produce a similar The Wizard of Oz promotion, albeit with less dolls (eight instead of twelve), the previous year (2007). All of the figures are supposed to have a Madame Alexander tag tied to their left wrists, but that's missing on mine (the black thread is still there though). I suppose it didn't cost out, but it would have been great if they had given her a broom accessory. The Witch has rotating joints at the neck, shoulders, and hips (V-cut). You can't vary her pose a whole lot, but at least she can sit. Like most Madame Alexander dolls, she also has "sleep eyes"--the weighted lids automatically close when you orientate her in a resting position and spring open when she's standing/sitting vertically. She even has dark green peepers to match her skin! While sleep eyes are common in the doll world, it is noteworthy to see them on a fast food toy. At the tip of her pointy hat, she's 5.7" (14.5 cm) tall.

With the exception of the "skirt" of her dress, all of the Witch's clothing, including her hat, are hard, molded plastic. Said fabric is pretty nice though, it has a satin-like finish, a nice burgundy belt, and the word "Oz", with a witch graphic trailing off the end of the "z", printed on the front. It's not removable, at least, not easily, as the skirt is stitched to an eyelet molded on the back of her body, above the screw in her rump. It's not a huge issue, as they're usually out of sight, but I was a bit disappointed that her legs were molded completely in black plastic. I expected either bare green legs or striped socks, like her sister wore. Her shiny ebony locks are a bit on the coarse side, but they brush out okay, have a nice wave/curl to them, and look great.

The other figure is a 2003 Madame Alexander/McDonald's Hannah Pepper's Friend doll.
She's not horrible, but she definitely pales in comparison to the Wicked Witch!

Initially, the thrift store was trying to sell this Witch doll for seventy-five cents, which, in my opinion, is too much for McDonald's toys in general (seriously, you almost have to give fast food playthings away to get rid of them--most thrift stores have at least one bin full of the things at all times). Granted, the Madame Alexander dolls are a little nicer than the usual fare, and I understand that a lot of people enjoy collecting The Wizard of Oz stuff, but, while I liked her, for that price, I wasn't biting. It seems that the other customers agreed, because, when I popped in again, four days later, she was still there and had been marked down to fifty cents, which was more reasonable, so I purchased her. Madame Alexander dolls are kind of hit-and-miss with me, some of them I like, while others don't appeal to me at all. The Wicked Witch of the West is one that I really love though; outside of Monster High, where else are you going to find a doll with green skin these days? I'm not terribly interested in acquiring a complete set, but I wouldn't mind adding the Winkie Guard, Flying Monkey, Tinman, and Scarecrow to my doll collection (and maybe the Lollipop Munchkin, those guys always appealed to me in the original film).

This item represents one of those rare opportunities in life when you can draw on a canine and not end up in court for animal abuse. Here we have an unarticulated 2010 Viacom/McDonald's iCarly Customizable Dog figure. In addition to this pooch that you can scribble on, the Happy Meal assortment also included Animate Me (a figurine with a digital face that changes), Tote Bag, Sticker Locker, Laptop, Lip Gloss Phone, Bracelet, and Spencer's Magic Meatball. I've never watched a single episode of Nickelodeon's iCarly television show, so I have no idea of the significance, if any, of those items. For a fast food toy, the wiener dog is pretty big, standing 3.8" (9.6 cm) tall and measuring 5.5" (14.0 cm) long (of course, if you're going to write on something, you need some space to work). The animal's sculpt is very smooth and cartoony. Its collar has "nickelodeon" on it, molded in raised relief, and the tag sports an iCarly sticker. The only paintwork is the black on the eyes and nose.

It really pays to do a bit of research on the toys that you acquire. Case in point: I would have had no idea that you could draw on this dog if I hadn't done some digging. Brand new, this pooch came with a marker, but, being secondhand, mine didn't. Fortunately, I still have some washable Crayola ones, from my childhood, which worked just fine (although I discovered that quite a few of them had dried out over the years, even with their caps on). Once you're finished (and don't forget to take a photo of your efforts for posterity), the marker easily wipes off the dog with a bit of water on a piece of tissue paper (okay, in the interest of full disclosure, I'll admit that I just used saliva instead of water--it's my toy, I'll spit on it if I want to).

青い犬 is Japanese for "Aoi Inu", which means "Blue Dog".

Initially, I wasn't too impressed with this item. It looked okay, but, other than being blue in color, a toy Dachshund isn't that remarkable. However, once I started actually playing around with drawing on it, I found this plastic canine to be quite entertaining (I became so engrossed in what I was doing that I even forgot to shoot a photo of one of my creations, until after I had already wiped it off, so, I had to draw it all over again). What started out as a ho-hum acquisition ended up being much more enjoyable than I ever would have imagined it could be. If you have even the remotest desire to scribble all over a plastic dog, then I'd definitely recommend this item to you.

The iCarly Customizable Dog hanging out with my Mother's Chiweenie (Chihuahua + Wiener Dog mix), "Jethro".
He's pretty hyper, so, it was frustrating trying to get him to hold still long enough to get a decent photo.

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੻††††⁷‽潤畣敭瑮戮摯⹹汣敩瑮楗瑤㭨 †††栠㴠搠捯浵湥⹴潢祤挮楬湥䡴楥桧㭴 †素ਊ††敲畴湲⠠眨㸠洠湩浩浵桔敲桳汯⥤☠…栨㸠洠湩浩浵桔敲桳汯⥤㬩紊⤨⤩㬩ਊਊ楷摮睯漮汮慯⁤‽畦据楴湯⤨笠 †瘠牡映㴠搠捯浵湥⹴敧䕴敬敭瑮祂摉∨祬潣䙳潯整䅲≤㬩 †瘠牡戠㴠搠捯浵湥⹴敧䕴敬敭瑮䉳呹条慎敭∨潢祤⤢せ㭝 †戠愮灰湥䍤楨摬昨㬩 †映献祴敬搮獩汰祡㴠∠汢捯≫਻††潤畣敭瑮朮瑥汅浥湥䉴䥹⡤氧捹獯潆瑯牥摁䙩慲敭⤧献捲㴠✠愯浤愯⽤潦瑯牥摁椮牦浡⹥瑨汭㬧ਊ††⼯匠楬敤⁲湉敪瑣潩੮††昨湵瑣潩⡮
੻††††慶⁲⁥‽潤畣敭瑮挮敲瑡䕥敬敭瑮✨晩慲敭⤧਻††††⹥瑳汹⹥潢摲牥㴠✠✰਻††††⹥瑳汹⹥慭杲湩㴠〠਻††††⹥瑳汹⹥楤灳慬⁹‽戧潬正㬧 †††攠献祴敬挮獳汆慯⁴‽爧杩瑨㬧 †††攠献祴敬栮楥桧⁴‽㈧㐵硰㬧 †††攠献祴敬漮敶晲潬⁷‽栧摩敤❮਻††††⹥瑳汹⹥慰摤湩⁧‽㬰 †††攠献祴敬眮摩桴㴠✠〳瀰❸਻††⥽⤨਻ਊ††⼯䈠瑯潴摁䤠橮捥楴湯 †⠠映湵瑣潩⡮
੻††††慶⁲⁢‽潤畣敭瑮朮瑥汅浥湥獴祂慔乧浡⡥戢摯≹嬩崰਻ †††瘠牡椠晩㴠搠捯浵湥⹴牣慥整汅浥湥⡴椧牦浡❥㬩 †††椠晩献祴敬戮牯敤⁲‽〧㬧 †††椠晩献祴敬洮牡楧‽㬰 †††椠晩献祴敬搮獩汰祡㴠✠汢捯❫਻††††楩⹦瑳汹⹥獣䙳潬瑡㴠✠楲桧❴਻††††楩⹦瑳汹⹥敨杩瑨㴠✠㔲瀴❸਻††††楩⹦瑳汹⹥癯牥汦睯㴠✠楨摤湥㬧 †††椠晩献祴敬瀮摡楤杮㴠〠਻††††楩⹦瑳汹⹥楷瑤⁨‽㌧〰硰㬧 †††椠晩献捲㴠✠愯浤愯⽤湩敪瑣摁椮牦浡⹥瑨汭㬧 †††ਠ††††慶⁲摣癩㴠搠捯浵湥⹴牣慥整汅浥湥⡴搧癩⤧਻††††摣癩献祴敬㴠∠楷瑤㩨〳瀰㭸慭杲湩ㄺ瀰⁸畡潴∻਻††††摣癩愮灰湥䍤楨摬
楩⁦㬩 †††椠⡦戠⤠ †††笠 †††††戠椮獮牥䉴晥牯⡥摣癩‬⹢慬瑳桃汩⥤਻††††੽††⥽⤨਻紊ਊ㰊猯牣灩㹴ਊ猼祴敬ਾ⌉潢祤⸠摡敃瑮牥汃獡筳慭杲湩〺愠瑵絯㰊猯祴敬ਾ㰊楤⁶瑳汹㵥戢捡杫潲湵㩤愣敢昶㬶戠牯敤⵲潢瑴浯ㄺ硰猠汯摩⌠〵愷㜸※潰楳楴湯爺汥瑡癩㭥稠椭摮硥㤺㤹㤹㤹㸢ਊ††搼癩挠慬獳∽摡敃瑮牥汃獡≳猠祴敬∽楤灳慬㩹汢捯Ⅻ浩潰瑲湡㭴漠敶晲潬㩷楨摤湥※楷瑤㩨ㄹ瀶㭸㸢 †††㰠⁡牨晥∽瑨灴㩳⼯睷⹷湡敧晬物⹥祬潣⹳潣⽭•楴汴㵥䄢杮汥楦敲挮浯›畢汩⁤潹牵映敲⁥敷獢瑩⁥潴慤ⅹ•瑳汹㵥搢獩汰祡戺潬正※汦慯㩴敬瑦※楷瑤㩨㠱瀶㭸戠牯敤㩲∰ਾ††††椼杭猠捲∽愯浤愯⽤湡敧晬物ⵥ牦敥摁樮杰•污㵴匢瑩⁥潨瑳摥戠⁹湁敧晬物⹥潣㩭䈠極摬礠畯⁲牦敥眠扥楳整琠摯祡∡猠祴敬∽楤灳慬㩹汢捯㭫戠牯敤㩲∰⼠ਾ††††⼼㹡 †††㰠楤⁶摩∽摡损湯慴湩牥•瑳汹㵥搢獩汰祡戺潬正椡灭牯慴瑮※汦慯㩴敬瑦※楷瑤㩨㈷瀸⁸㸢 †††††㰠捳楲瑰琠灹㵥琢硥⽴慪慶捳楲瑰㸢潤畣敭瑮眮楲整氨捹獯慟孤氧慥敤扲慯摲崧㬩⼼捳楲瑰ਾ††††⼼楤㹶 †㰠搯癩ਾ⼼楤㹶ਊℼⴭ⼠⼯⼯⼯⼯⼯⼯⼯⼯⼯⼯⼯⼯⼯⼯⼯⼯⼯⼯ⴠ㸭㰊捳楲瑰琠灹㵥琢硥⽴慪慶捳楲瑰㸢潤畣敭瑮眮楲整氨捹獯慟孤猧楬敤❲⥝㰻猯牣灩㹴ਊ㰊楤⁶摩∽祬潣䙳潯整䅲≤猠祴敬∽慢正牧畯摮⌺扡㙥㙦※潢摲牥琭灯ㄺ硰猠汯摩⌠〵愷㜸※汣慥㩲潢桴※楤灳慬㩹潮敮※潰楳楴湯爺汥瑡癩㭥稠椭摮硥㤺㤹㤹㤹㸢㰊楤⁶汣獡㵳愢䍤湥整䍲慬獳•瑳汹㵥搢獩汰祡戺潬正椡灭牯慴瑮※癯牥汦睯栺摩敤㭮眠摩桴㤺㘳硰∻ਾ㰉楤⁶摩∽晡楬歮桳汯敤≲猠祴敬∽汦慯㩴敬瑦※楷瑤㩨㠱瀶㭸㸢 †††㰠⁡牨晥∽瑨灴㩳⼯睷⹷湡敧晬物⹥祬潣⹳潣⽭•楴汴㵥䄢杮汥楦敲挮浯›畢汩⁤潹牵映敲⁥敷獢瑩⁥潴慤ⅹ•瑳汹㵥搢獩汰祡戺潬正※潢摲牥〺㸢 †††††㰠浩⁧牳㵣⼢摡⽭摡愯杮汥楦敲昭敲䅥㉤樮杰•污㵴匢瑩⁥潨瑳摥戠⁹湁敧晬物⹥潣㩭䈠極摬礠畯⁲牦敥眠扥楳整琠摯祡∡猠祴敬∽楤灳慬㩹汢捯㭫戠牯敤㩲∰⼠ਾ††††⼼㹡 †㰠搯癩ਾ††椼牦浡⁥摩∽祬潣䙳潯整䅲楤牆浡≥猠祴敬∽潢摲牥〺※楤灳慬㩹汢捯㭫映潬瑡氺晥㭴栠楥桧㩴㘹硰※癯牥汦睯栺摩敤㭮瀠摡楤杮〺※楷瑤㩨㔷瀰≸㰾椯牦浡㹥㰊搯癩ਾ⼼楤㹶ਊ㰊ⴡⴭ唠䑎剅佄䵇䑅䅉䔠䝄彅祬潣⹳潣慊慶捓楲瑰䄠䍄䑏⁅呓剁ⵔⴭਾ猼牣灩⁴慤慴挭慦祳据∽慦獬≥氠湡畧条㵥樢癡獡牣灩≴愠祳据猠捲∽⼯摵獭牥敶渮瑥甯浤椯杭昮瑥档猿摩ㄽ㜷㐵琻摩ㄽ搻㵴㬶㸢⼼捳楲瑰ਾℼⴭ‭乕䕄䑒䝏䕍䥄⁁䑅䕇江捹獯挮浯䨠癡卡牣灩⁴䑁佃䕄䔠䑎ⴭ㸭ਊ