Birdie and her husband Rick had separated. I had again begun seeing Birdie, who reminded me very much of Louise. I didn't feel as if I were in love with her, but I wanted to continue seeing her anyway.
I went to her apartment one day and found her in the bedroom lying on the bed. I knelt down on my knees beside her and half-way lay on top of her. She seemed distraught; I had the feeling she had begun seeing Rick again. I finally said, "OK. What's the matter?."
She tried to avoid the subject but finally said that seeing me was very hard on her. She admitted she had been seeing Rick and said part of her time was now also devoted to him. She seemed more and more like Louise.
She wanted to know whether I loved her. She seemed to indicate that if I could tell her I loved her, she would return to me completely; but I was unprepared to do that.
I walked into another bedroom, sat down on the bed and to my right noticed a computer on a stand near the bed. It had a black screen which revolved so I could turn it toward me. I played around with it for a bit.
Suddenly I heard someone at the front door. Birdie ran into the front room and I followed. She said, "Oh it's Rick. He's here an hour early."
Rick (probably in his early 20s) walked in. I had never met Rick. I looked at him out of the corner of my eye. He was slender, about my height, and he had longish brown hair. I was somewhat afraid of him and I thought he might be volatile. He handed Birdie a present and then sat down on the couch.
I sat down on another couch directly across from him. My shoes were lying on the floor and I was just in socks. Obviously I had made myself at home. Birdie sat down in a chair between us. Finally I stood, approached Rick and held out my hand. We shook hands and sat back down. He seemed as if he likewise was glad we were meeting and that we might be able to resolve the situation. He said, "I'm glad we both admitted we wanted to meet."
I wanted to tell him we really needed to resolve the situation because Birdie was becoming more and more distraught and we were wrecking her life. I began feeling more calm around Rick. I thought we might be able to work it out so we could both see Birdie, although I was unsure how that could be arranged. It appeared there wasn't going to be as much conflict as I had originally anticipated.
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