You got questions, we got answers.
Questions asked by real people of me!
*Definition of "real" could differ from person to person.
Q: So Jeff, what's with the book for the image?
A:
Well, books have always been the symbol of intellectual growth and prosperity throughout the history of our rich and versatile world. When one saw "book" one thought intelligence. Thus, the visual connection of seeing the reason of man's growth in mind could possibly stimulate the viewer to clean up his perception tool, so that he could further enjoy and grasp the wonders of this web page.
Q: You just had nothing else to put up there, right?
A:
Yeah.
Q: What would you consider your strongest quality or trait?
A:
It would most definitely have to be my dashing good looks.
Q: Uh huh, so why don't you have a pic of yourself for everyone to see? I thought you had a scanner?
A:
Next question.
Q: What is your favorite food?
A:
Who can hate the all mighty Twinkie?
Q: Are you a nerd? It seems like you have a bunch of free time if you can make a web page with a bunch of useless information on it.
A:
Useless?? USELESS?!!! What if you were kidknapped by the Mafia and they threatened to slit your belly and let the birds eat your guts unless you could tell them my favorite food, what would you do? Huh?? HUH?!
Q: I gathered from your webpage that you had a little brother. Tell me about him.
A:
He is a raving loon, a babbling derelict, an insane creature with no power of reasoning what so ever, and he owns a pocket knife. Be afraid.. be very afraid.
Q: Do you love your brother?
A:
Oh yeah of course. He's my little bud, always there when I need him. =)
Q: What is Log53?
A:
1.724275869601.
Q: How did you answer that so quickly?
A:
Heh heh heh. I bet you'd like to know.
Q: What is your favorite thing to do in your spare time?
A:
Well, considering that I am constantly busy with the many activities of life, and spare time so rarely comes to me, it would be rather impossible to answer the question.
Q: So basically you're saying with all the free time you have, you run out of things to do, and they're all equally boring?
A:
Something to that nature.
Q: Please explain the correct usage of the phrase "exact same."
A:
"Exact same" is a corpuscular phrase that should be used only when something is exactly the same as something. It is the opposite (or "antibody") of "a whole nother."
EXAMPLE: "This is the exact same restaurant where Alma found weevils in her pie. They gave her a whole nother slice."
Q: Are you a pimp?
A:
I despise unsupported rumors. These accusations must be dealt with accordingly, namely castration and ultimately death. That is all I have to say.
Q: But we have heard from the Guru himself (Higgs) that you were a very excellent student of his, learned in the arts of pimping! At least give us some solid evidence to back up your denial.
A:
Can you all not see that is nothing but an insidious plot to undermine my reputation and credibility! That worthless "Guru" is nothing but a gossip monger and a wannabe! I am the true PIMP! Wait..........I mean...........
uh.....
Q: So, tell us about your means of transportation.
A:
Well, my "car" weighs about 5 pounds. If it was to touch a real car (like Jason's Tank) than it would blow up into a million different pieces. It has 193,000 miles on it, so you can say its been around (the world) a few times. The engine will get hot enough to cook eggs with if you go over 50 miles per hour, so that naturally means no highway. If I want to go in reverse I have to do it manually, and by that I mean putting it in neutral and pushing it out. Naturally I avoid head in parking. The interior is in shreds, the right blinker is shot, somebody egged the bumper, and the paint is peeling......NO ONE has the right to comlain about crappy cars, until they have driven mine.
If you would like to ask an insightful yet provacative question, please feel free to e-mail it to me, and hopefully you're question can be answered up here! Otherwise I would have to continue making up stuff to put up here. Thanks a bundle!
