Guilty Pleasures
Jessica
Spike stepped out of the shower and wrapped a towel around his waist. He
looked at Xander's alarm clock. The whelp wasn't due to be home for another
hour. He walked over to his duster and pulled a CD out of one of the
pockets. He smiled when he looked at the cover. Elvis Presley's Greatest
Hits. No one knew this, but he was a huge Elvis fan. It was his guilty
pleasure. He was too ashamed to tell anyone about it. So, he only indulged
in this pleasure when no one was around.
He walked over to the stereo and popped in the CD. "Fools Rush In" came
pouring out of the speakers. Spike began to hum along to the song. He
dropped his towel and walked over to the kitchen area. He picked up a broom
and began to slow dance with it to the song. He was so into it that he
failed to hear the basement door open. He failed to notice Xander standing
there watching him with an amused grin, trying desperately not to laugh his
ass off. And he continued not to notice the boy until Xander jumped in front
of him singing at the top of his lungs, "Take my hand! Take my whole life
too! For I can't help falling in love with you!".
Spike was completely mortified. So he did the only thing any self-respecting
vampire would do. He screamed like a girl.
"Gah!!!!"
Xander grinned widely at this reaction. He turned to Spike, curled his lip
in pure Elvis fashion and said, "Thank you. Thank you very much."
Spike glared at Xander. "What in the bloody hell are you trying to do? Give
me a 'eart attack?" he screamed.
Xander just smirked at him. "Hate to point this out to you Fangless, but
your heart needs to beat for it to be in danger of a heart attack. So I
guess you have nothing to worry about." He looked Spike up and down. "Um
Spike? Do you think you could put some clothes on?"
Spike looked down at himself, remembering that he was standing there
completely naked. If vampires could blush, he'd probably be the color of
Willow's hair right now. He ran to the other side of the room to grab
something to wear. He pulled on a black t-shirt and a pair of black jeans.
When he was done getting dressed, he turned back towards Xander, who was
still laughing.
"I just have one thing to ask" Xander said to Spike. "Why the hell were you
listening to Elvis?"
"'Cause I bloody well felt like it, that's why. I 'appen to like the bloke.
'E's got good music. What of it?" Spike replied.
Xander just looked at Spike and shook his head, "I just never pictured the
'Big Bad' listening to Elvis. Well, I guess you learn something new
everyday." He walked to the fridge to get something to eat.
Spike was steaming. How could he let a wanker like Xander Harris embarrass
him like that? He was a Master Vampire for christ's sake! Then he thought of
something. A sneer spread across his face. Spike strolled over to where
Xander was standing. He got right in Xander's face and said, "Why are you
home so early anyway? Did they can your arse from this job too?"
Xander's face went blank. He stared at Spike with cold brown eyes. "Why
don't you shut your fucking mouth, Twinkle Toes. You always have some
smart-ass fucking comment to say, and I am sick and fucking tired of it!"
Xander screamed. At that point, he just snapped. All the anger he had been
holding in was now directed at the chipped vampire in front of him.
"I have enough shit on my mind without having to worry about you mouthing
off to me. My life fucking sucks, my girlfriend is a pain in the ass, and I
can't even hold down a crappy minimum wage job for more than a month!"
Xander then, to the shock of the vampire who was frozen in place watching
the boy, began to pick things up from around the room and hurl them at the
wall as he screamed.
Spike didn't know what to do. He had never seen Xander act like this before.
But he guessed it was a matter of time before the boy snapped. So he just
let Xander rant and rave and get everything off his chest. He would never
admit this to anyone, but he like the boy. He didn't like to see Xander in
pain and unhappy. He wished he could help him. Oi, I'm getting soft in my
old age, Spike thought to himself.
"I hate this goddamned basement, I hate this fucking town, I hate all the
asshole people here, I hate it, I hate it, I HATE IT!!!" he punctuated each
thing he listed by throwing another object at the wall. He picked up
something slightly heavy and tossed it with all his strength. It hit the
wall with a thump, and an inhuman amount of pinkish looking goo splattered
everywhere, especially all over Spike.
That broke Xander out of his rage. He stared at the wall, then at Spike,
back at the wall, and back at Spike again. Then he bust out laughing. He
fell over onto the floor, clutching his stomach. He was laughing so hard
that he had tears running down his face.
While Xander was laughing at Spike's expense yet again, he grabbed the towel
he had dropped on the floor earlier and used it to wipe the goo off his face
and clothes. Spike had no idea what it was. He walked over to the wall that
was splattered in the pink stuff, and looked on the floor. There lay the
hugest tub of hair gel he had ever laid eyes on. It was the type of thing
his poof of a sire had wet dreams about. At that thought, and the fact that
he could still here the boy laughing hysterically, Spike broke out into
hysterics as well.
After about ten minutes, Spike and Xander had finally calmed down. They had
both needed that after the tenseness earlier. Especially Xander. He felt
really bad for freaking out at the blonde like he had. It's just that he had
been holding all that in for so long, and it had decided to just pour out at
that moment, and he had been powerless to stop it. But in a way, he felt a
thousand times better for getting it all off his chest.
"Spike, I'm sorry I blew up at you. Everything was just building up inside
of me, and I guess I just had to let it out," said Xander.
Spike turned and looked at the boy. He could see in Xander's eyes that he
felt genuinely sorry for yelling at Spike. And Spike, being the nancyboy
that he seemed to be becoming, immediately forgot any anger he was feeling
towards the boy.
"It's alright pet," Spike said. "We all need to blow off a bit of steam once
in a while."
With that said, Spike walked over to his duster and took a pack of
cigarettes from the pocket. As he pulled them out, a few small shiny things
fell out of the pocket. Curious, Xander got up off the floor and walked over
there. He picked the items up and saw that they were purple sequins. Why in
the hell would Spike be walking around with purple sequins in his pocket,
Xander thought to himself.
Xander walked over to Spike and showed the vampire what he was holding in
his hand. Spike looked at it, and then looked up at him sheepishly. Xander
just raised an eyebrow.
"Back in the early '70's I was at an Elvis concert," explained Spike.
"During the concert, I snuck backstage and went into 'is dressing room and
swiped them off one of them poofy jumpsuits he wore at the time."
Xander snorted. "You stole sequins from one of Elvis's jumpsuits? You know,
there's a thin line between being a devoted fan and being unhealthily
obsessed. And anyway, how'd you manage to get backstage?"
Spike grinned mischievously. "Drained the security guard. The bloke didn't
taste too good. I think 'e was doped up on something."
Xander just shook his head. "I should've known," he said.
It was at that moment Spike realized that the CD was still playing. "Hound
Dog" came blaring through the basement. Spike grinned and began to sing his
own version of the song.
"I ain't nothing but the Big Bad, biting everyone. I ain't nothing but the
Big Bad, biting everyone. You ain't never gonna get away so don't you try to
run."
Xander burst into laughter again.
Must Haves:
- Spike as a closet Elvis fan.
- Xander singing 'Only Fools Rush In'
- One (or both) of our boys dancing naked.
- The line: "Thank you, thank you very much"
- A big tub of Hair Gel
- One of our boys rewriting and singing part of an Elvis song. (Not 'Fools
Rush In', that has to be kept verbatim)
- purple sequins
~Jessica~
