When
By Danii

Rupert Giles was beginning to suspect something was going on.

This wasn’t unusual in and of itself. Giles regularly though something
was going on, but in most of the cases, whatever he suspected was
happening involved the big fiery pit which led to Hell. But this didn’t.

No, this concerned two people who he considered family (though, honestly,
one seemed more like that very annoying cousin who wouldn’t leave your
house and actually look for an apartment because he’s just a lazy bastard
with no ambition). And even though that also left open the possibility
for the goings on to be involved with said fiery pit, the former librarian
had a feeling that it didn’t.

But he wasn’t exactly sure what it DID involve.

He was starting to suspect that he didn’t want to know.

It had taken time for him to notice the small signs, the light touches,
the closeness between the two men. He’d almost looked over the softened
tone of the bickering, not to mention the smiles they’d often give each
other almost like a signal that they didn’t mean it and were just playing
to the crowd.

Spike and Xander.

The names together just blew him away. Those two, the vampire and the
Scooby, as he himself would put it, were just a pair that couldn’t click
in the ex-Watcher’s mind.

But nonetheless, there they were, sitting on the couch in his apartment
researching this week’s big bad demon…with Spike’s hand on Xander’s thigh!

This had to be addressed, he knew, and it would be addressed tonight.

“Um, Spike? Xander?”

Two heads popped up from their books simultaneously.

“M-may I speak to the two of you in private?”

A double nod which did nothing to reassure him, though he did thank
whoever was listening that Buffy, Willow, and Tara were too busy with
their work to notice the synchronic sideshow .

Giles beckoned them with his hand and led the pair towards the back room
normally used for sparring practice. As soon as the door was closed,
Xander spoke up.

“What’s up, G-man?”
Giles rolled his eyes, but didn’t say anything about the detested nick
name. He had more important things to do.

“Well…” he began as he pulled off his glasses and started scrubbing at
them as he usually did, “I was just wondering-”

“If Spike and I were regularly shagging each other’s brains out?”

Immediately, the hand holding the glasses let go, and it was only the bit
of wool that was caught in his frames which kept the spectacles from
shattering on the floor. He untangled it and looked to Xander with his
eyes wide.

“W-w-what did you say?”

Xander rolled his eyes to Spike, who shrugged and grinned.

“I said, are you wondering if Spike and I are regularly patrolling with
each other?”

The storekeeper shook himself, then answered shakily, “Uh…no. I mean,
yes, but no.”

“Huh?”

“What I meant to say was…what I was asking…”

A pair of blue eyes and a pair of brown eyes looked at him innocently.

“I-”

“Are you gonna wait till we just 69 each other right here?”

“WHAT?!”

Finally, Spike spoke up, obviously getting tired of the interrogation, or
lack of one.

“The whelp just asked you if you were gonna wait another 69 years till you
figure out what the bloody hell you wanted to say…”

“Oh…” the former Watcher flustered, “I’m sorry…I’m just a little flustered
with the pack of Fl’tran demons…”

Xander smiled at him in understanding.

“It’s all right, G-man…” the young man said, which calmed down the
ex-librarian better then one would expect. It was the first thing he’d
heard right.

“Yeah, Rupes…” the vampire chimed in with a cocky grin, “Don’t get your
knickers in a twist. There’s nothing wrong with a coupla blokes boinkin’
each others brains out…”

Giles didn’t say anything. He just stared.

“What’s wrong with him?” Xander asked in shock at the man’s stare, “All
you said was to calm down about the demons. And you’re right, Buffy’ll
give um a good bonk in the head and splatter their brains out. It’s not
like you described how hot I look with your cock in my mouth.”

Giles gave a very un-Watcher-like squeek.

“Yup, knock their teeth right out of their mouths!”

He calmed.

“Or how I love to pound into you, pet…don’t forget that…”

This one was closer to a squelch.

“Yeah, it’s kinda fun to see them pounded. Demons slush….”

He didn’t calm.

“And how you like to ride me-”

No noise. It was too extreme for noise. He was just a few movements away
from the fetal position in fact.

Xander and Spike stopped speaking.

“Giles? You okay?”

“Yeah, Rupes…”

Giles didn’t respond in any other way then to stare at the two men.

“I…thought talking about battles and stuff would make you feel better…”

Finally, he got to the stage at which he could squeak. He squeaked.

The two shared a look, then looked to Giles.

“Well, G-man…looks like we’ll head back to the books so that we can take
out those demons…”

Giles squeaked again.

“See ya up front, Watcher…” Spike added as the two made their way out of
the room. Giles watched them leave, but he was too freaked to hear the
conversation as they left.

“Was that necessary, pet? I figure, what with the Watcher’s little
magician fuck-toy of yesteryear, he’da understood…”

“Yeah, but wasn’t this much more fun?”

“Of course but…damn, luv, you’ve got one hell of a mischievous streak…”

“You know it, hot stuff…”

“Xander…”

“And I am going to tell him…just not right now…”

“All right, pet…we play things your way.”

“We always have.”

“But as someone who’s gotten this treatment before, I feel a bit bad for
the Watcher.”

“You? Feel bad?”

“You didn’t hear that.”

“But I did…”

“Nu-uh.”

“Whatever, sexy…”

The End