Adam Cartwright

By Tennessee

Part 1

Ben was thinking about his gift for Adam’s birthday. He’d come up with the idea to write a book about Adam’s childhood, when he was born until now. He sent Adam on a cattle drive with the Greens’ cowboys so he could write the story.

He waited until Little Joe and Hoss had left for school and then began to write Adam’s story:

Adam, my son, as I think about you turning twenty-two years old my mind goes back to the day you were born. When your ma told me she was with child I was so happy, and we couldn’t wait until you were born. Your ma had a hard time giving birth to you. She died not long after you were born, but she loved you and me very much. She had you in her arms when she passed away. I stood there looking at you and her and started to cry. I picked you up and left the bedroom with you. I didn’t know how I’d care for you.

I tried to make a life for house in the house your mother and I had lived in, but I could not. So we moved to another town. We went by wagon; it took a long time.

When you were a month old, you cried a lot. I think you missed your ma. I had to be both mother and father to you. I did this the best I could. When you were two months old, you stayed awake a lot. When you were three months old, I began to see your mother in your eyes; you look so much like her.

At four months you smiled at me. When you turned five months, you kept looking at your feet and hands and you made me smile. By six months you were trying to crawl. By seven months you were trying to pull yourself up on everything. One time as you were pulling yourself up on a chair, you hit your face on the chair and began to cry. I picked you up and held you and told you everything would be all right.

I always told you your ma loved you with all her heart. And I told you stories about your ma at bedtime, and you’d fall asleep right after I told you a story about your ma. I would watch you sleep for hours.

At eight months, you began to start talking. The first word you said was "ma" and I cried because my heart went out to you. At nine months you took your first step with me helping you. At ten months you got your first cold, and I stayed up with you all night. And then you got your first tooth and you cried all night and I rocked you and sang to you and rubbed your gums to try to help you with the pain.

At eleven months you said "papa" clearly. And I was so happy I put my arms around you and said, "I love you, son."

At twelve months you were walking on your own. You were into everything, son. I couldn’t take my eyes off you for a minute, and every time I looked at you I saw your ma. I made you a cake when you turned one year old, but I burned the top of the cake and had to cut that part off. It was hard for me to believe that you were already one year old. Sometimes it seemed like you were just born and now you were one year old.

I told you about your ma a lot. You would ask if your ma was pretty. And I told you yes, she was, a very pretty woman, and her smile would light up a room. Just like your smile, son. You would laugh and so would I.

We had a good friend whose name was Rose. She loved you. You and I moved again. When we were on the road on our way to our new home, we talked and sang songs. When we got to our new home, you wanted to go back to our old home.

The time passed and you turned two years old. You got mad at me one day and hid from me, and I was scared that I’d lost you . . .

About that time, Hoss and Little Joe came home. Ben put up Adam’s story and left his room.

Part 2

When Ben went to his room for the night, he got out the book he’d started for Adam and began writing again:

Inger was so sweet to us. She was our first friend in the town. You had a cold, and she gave you something to make you feel better, and you and her became real good friends. When I started having feelings for her I thought of your ma and I cried, but I knew Elizabeth would want us both to be happy. So I asked Inger to be my wife. I thought you would be upset about it, but you were happy. We were a family, and she loved you just like you were her own son.

When Inger had Eric, she made sure she always had time for you, Adam. And I talked to you about your ma a lot. Elizabeth will always be your mother, son, and she will always be the love of my life.

As you grew, the time went by fast, and before I knew it you were found years old and a little man.

After Inger died it was just the three of us, you, me, and Eric. I was sad for a long time, but one day I looked at you and saw my little boy helping his brother and I smiled. The older you got, the more you looked like your ma.

We went on to another town, and there we made a home. I was always working and cooking and trying to tell you and your brother stories, especially about your ma's.

We met Marie, and she smiled at you boys and you looked to me, unsure what to do. You did not want me to marry anyone else. You and your brother got mad and cried, and I backed off seeing Marie though I thought about her a lot.

One night I ran into Marie and told her I loved her and asked her to marry me. After Marie and I married, you were so mad at me you tried to run away, and I had to find you.

I told you, "Adam, son, Marie loves all of us."

You said, "Pa, I miss my ma and Inger."

I said, "So do I, son."

With tears, you said, "No, you don't. You don't talk about my ma or Inger to us anymore."

I told you I was sorry and that I would start talking about them again. So that night I told you and Eric about your ma's, and you both smiled at me.

As time passed, you and Eric grew to love Marie. Before I knew it you were half grown and you looked like your ma more than ever. Little Joe was born and you boys were my life, and still are. Time passes so fast, son.

When we were all happy together, you started calling Marie "Ma." Your grandfather, Abel Morgan, sent you gifts and letters all the time.

After we got to Eagle Station and I found a job, your ma was a schoolteacher. She taught you at home everything they did at school. Your grandfather wrote me a letter saying your grandmother had passed away. When I told you, you cried and cried. You said, "I didn't know her, but I loved her."

I gave you a letter from your grandmother.

"Read it for me, Pa," you said.

"Ok, son. Dear Adam. I wanted you to know that there was not a day I did not think about you. On your birthday every year I made a cake, and we went to your mother's grave. Adam, your mother loved you with all her heart, and we miss her a lot. Adam, I'm real sick, and I just want you to know that I love you, Grandson. I'm so proud of you. Love, Grandmother."

I folded the letter and put my arms around you. Marie was crying too, and she came over to you and kissed you.

Before I knew it, you'd turned eighteen years old and were becoming a man. I was so proud of you. You got out of school and helped me work in the trading post and watch out for your brothers. We were saving money to buy a ranch.

At twenty, you were a young man, and you loved to read. When Marie was killed when the bomb blew up, you were strong and you were there for Hoss and Little Joe, and me too. It was a hard time. I had three sons and had lost three wives. I was so mad, but I told your ma I would stay the good man she married, and I will. Eli gave us the deed to some land, and now we have the Ponderosa.

When you were twenty-one, you met Isabella and fell in love for the first time. She left and married someone else, and it broke my heart to see the hurt in your eyes. But life goes on, and you met Ann, and she loves you. But both of you are so young. If Ann isn't the right one, then I know the right woman will come along one day.

Adam, never forget that I love you always. As father and son, we have had our fights, especially when you wanted your own pistol. I'm sure we'll find other things to fight about, but we'll always make up, son. It's hard for me to believe you will be twenty-two years old. You'll always be my little boy, my first born. You lost three mothers in your lifetime, and it was hard on you, I know. It was hard on me, too, but I had you and your brothers, and that helped me move on, son. Elizabeth will always live through you. And every time I look at you I see her. And I smile and think of how proud of you Elizabeth would be. Happy birthday, son. Pa.

Ben closed the book and wrapped it in paper and put it away. He went to bed thinking about the last twenty-two years.

Part 3

Adam's 22nd Birthday

A week later Adam came back from the cattle drive. His birthday was about a month away. He knew he would get a pistol this year, for on his birthday he'd be twenty-two years old, a man.

As the weeks passed, Adam could not wait for his birthday. He kept thinking about his pistol and how much he wanted one.

On Adam's birthday, Hop Sing made a cake and gave Adam a new book. Hoss gave him some new saddlebags. Little Joe said he'd do Adam's chores, with Hoss' help. And Ben handed him a wrapped gift. With a sad look on his face, Adam took the gift but did not open it. Little Joe said, "Open it, Adam." It was a book with writing in it.

Adam got mad. "What is this?"

"A book I wrote about you and our times together."

"Pa, I wanted a pistol. I'm twenty-two years old now."

"Adam, listen to me, son. You are not old enough for a pistol yet. But soon."

"When you were my age, you had a pistol."

"I also had a wife."

Adam said, "I'll work and get my own pistol then." He walked out of the house and got one his horse and went for a long ride. He did not join the family for supper. He waited until everyone was asleep and then he came in and packed his clothes and left a note on his bed. He saw the book Pa had given him on the table and took it with him when he left the Ponderosa.

He camped out that night and by firelight he saw the book. He couldn't read it now, he was so mad. So he went to sleep. He had a bad dream and woke up. He couldn't get back to sleep so he started to read Pa's gift. As he read it, tears ran down his cheeks and he kept reading until he got to the last page. He was crying so hard he could barely make out the words.

This gift came from Pa's heart, he told himself. How could I have hurt Pa like I did? He packed up his stuff and rode back home. It was daybreak when he arrived and he hoped to sneak into bed before anyone knew he'd been gone.

Ben did not sleep much that night, and he heard Adam come in and leave again. He went to the boys' room and saw the note. He later heard Adam come in again. Ben opened his bedroom door a little and saw Adam sneak into the bunkroom.

Adam was glad the note was still there. He put the note in his book and closed it. About that time, he heard Ben get up. He went to the kitchen. "I'm sorry, Pa. I love the book you made. It will always be special to me."

"I know you're a man, son," Ben said. "I'll get you a pistol and teach you to shoot it when the time is right."

"I know you will, Pa."

They smiled at each other, and they were talking when Hoss and Little Joe came in. Hop Sing came out with Adam's birthday cake, and they were all happy. Adam never told Ben he'd left the Ponderosa, and Ben never told Adam about having found the note.

Ben smiled. "Happy birthday, son."

"Thank you, Pa." He showed his brothers the book Pa had made for him. They told Ben they wanted one of them too.

Adam laughed. "You better get busy, Pa."

Ben smiled and everyone laughed.

The End