(tag
story to He Called Me Brother)
by
Arkangel
Disclaimer: The characters and situations of the TV program
"Big Valley" are the creations of Four Star/Republic Pictures and
have been used without permission. No
copyright infringement is intended by the author. The ideas expressed in this story are copyrighted to the author.
Nick waited
patiently for his little brother to return, pacing, more from the excitement
than nerves, he walked the length of the porch to the grand house ..... his
home ..... he stopped ever so often when a rider made their way to the barn,
when it was determined that it was not Heath, he continued. The day of
branding, though long and hot, gave him ample time to decide how to breach the
subject of their morning conversation. He was on cloud nine ..... the shear
fact that Heath had acknowledged him as 'brother' set his soul to souring with
the eagles.
He worked along side
the ranch hands, body screaming to slow down ..... to rest ..... but knowing
the quicker he finished, the sooner he could see his little brother again and
talk the talk he so looked forward to. He didn't push the others, he knew the
hands gave as much of themselves as they could. They understood Nick's desire
to get to the house ..... they had seen the pure joy on his face at the words
Heath had spoken and he wasn't ashamed. Many knew that it was long over due and
each had told Nick that they silently wished for the day the two would see what
they had already noticed.
Nick's head shot up
at the unmistakable sound of a wagon, and the gallop of hooves heading into the
yard. "He's here." Nick smiled. Turning his head to look at the
french doors leading into the parlor, he chuckled at the three smiling faces
peering back at him. Seeing his mother nod her head and usher Jarrod and Audra
away from the doors to give them privacy, he steeled himself and walked, as
casually as he could, to the front step.
* * * * * * * *
Heath felt like a
new man, his happiness at the events of the morning glowed more and more as he
road closer to his destination. Following the wagon, he slowed his mount as the
gate and the 'Barkley' name setting proudly atop came into view. "We're
home, Gal." Heath said, giving Gal a gentle pat, "Let's go." Heath
gave Gal a small kick and galloped forward, passing the wagon and entering the
yard slightly ahead of it.
His first thought
was to go to the barn, take care of Gal, then continue to the house. Those
thoughts were soon dashed when he noticed his older brother standing on the
porch and grinned as Nick straightened up and made his way to the porch steps.
"Huh, wonder how long he's be waitin'?" Heath asked as he turned Gal
toward the house.
* * * * * * * *
Stopping in front of
the house, Heath jumped smoothly out of the saddle and tossed the reins over
the hitching post, "Nick." He grinned.
"Heath."
Nick grinned back with a quick nod.
"I ..... uh
..... suppose we're gonna have that talk now?"
Nick chuckled softly
at the almost shy way Heath asked, "Yeah, if you're up to it." He
answered waving a hand toward the step.
Heath made his way
to the steps and sat down, giving a small groan as his muscles slightly
protested.
"Sore?"
Nick said, concerned.
"Yep, reckon I
pushed myself a little."
Nick took the step
just above Heath, and let out a small groan of his own, smiling sheepishly at
the soft laughter coming from his little brother he stated, "Guess I might
have pushed myself a little, too."
"Ya
think?" Heath said playfully.
They sat quietly for
a few moments, just enjoying the company. Nick pondered his feelings once more,
hoping that what he wanted to say would come out right. He was soon surprised
as the soft spoken words of Heath filled the silence.
"I'm
sorry." Heath said.
Nick raised an
eyebrow, "For what?"
Sighing, Heath
continued, "I've been so angry ..... all my life I've been angry ..... I
guess, once I came here I didn't know how else to be."
Nick nodded but
remained silent.
"I respect ya,
Nick ..... never respected anyone more ..... I dreamed of having brothers and
sisters when I was younger. When I found out ..... " Swallowing the lump
trying to form in his throat, he continued, "When I found out I had all of
you ..... when I found out I had a family ..... "
"You were
angry." Nick finished.
"Yeah. I fought
and clawed and kicked my way through life ..... it was hard to not be angry
when I realized I coulda had this," Heath waved his right hand behind him
toward the house, "and all of you. I tried so hard to fit in, to be part
of this family ..... to be your brother ..... but I done it all wrong."
"No, you
tried."
"It was easy
you know." Heath whispered.
"What
was?" Nick questioned.
"Fighting with
you. I needed to have that conflict to feel alive. Jarrod is so mild mannered
and I figured out he stuck logic in everything and ..... well Audra just won't
let ya win an argument, so I gave up on that," Heath chuckled, "and
your Mother ..... I could never say a cross word to her ..... she's .....
"
"Special."
Nick nodded.
"Yeah .....
you're a lucky man." Heath agreed.
Nick gave Heath a
fond look, "Yes ..... yes I am." He agreed.
Heath turned at the
soft reply, "I have a lot of things to tell ya, Nick ..... some aren't to
pretty ..... and ..... and I don't think and I can do it right now."
"I'll
wait."
"You won't like
some of it ..... it's ugly."
"I'll manage
..... I want to hear everything ..... Heath ..... everything ..... but only
when YOU"RE ready." Nick placed a hand gently on Heath's shoulder,
"You know I was angry too."
Heath's eyes widened
a little, "Yeah?"
"Yep."
"Reckon we're a
lot alike." Heath realized what he had said and made a move to get up.
Nick tightened his
hold on Heath's shoulder, "No more running, no more walking on egg shells
..... no more ..... no more anger." Nick smiled, "We ARE a lot alike,
and I'm right proud of it, we are brothers after all."
"I'm proud of
that too, I just ..... well sometimes I feel like I'm on the outside lookin'
in. Like when I was a boy and knowing that there are the 'haves' and 'have
nots', I've always been a 'have not'."
"That's not
true any more, you are most definitely a 'have' ..... you have a name, you have
a family, you have a future with those that love you." Nick took a deep,
cleansing breathe, "When you came here, Heath ..... all I could think
about was being angry ..... I wasn't really angry at you ..... I was angry at
Father for what he had done to this family ..... and later for what he had done
to you. But you know what."
"What?"
Heath asked.
"I'm glad he
did it, because if he hadn't ..... well ..... WE wouldn't HAVE you."
"Mighta been a
good thing." Heath said sadly.
Nick angered at
that, "Don't you say that ..... " getting up and pulling Heath up
with him, he turned Heath to facing him, both hands on his shoulders,
"Don't you ever say that!"
Heath grew quiet and
a bit shocked at the outburst.
"I don't want
you to ever think you're not wanted here, that we would be better off without
you! I don't want to hear you ever ..... and I mean never put yourself down
like that! You're part of this family, a Barkley and I thank God now that you
found us!" Nick gave Heath a brisk shake, " Heath, I worked hard to
get past my anger and put the truth into perspective ..... I just didn't go
about it the right way, that was me ..... not YOU! When I think of the Hell I
put you through ..... " Nick released Heath and sat heavily on the step.
Heath blinked,
feeling the glide of a small tear as it escaped quietly down his cheek, "I
..... I've been through worse." Heath consoled as he took his seat.
"I'm your
brother. A brother's not suppose to treat a brother that way ..... Damn
it!" Nick said through his emotions, "Duke tried to tell me what I
was doing, Mother warned me I could loose everything if I didn't see ..... and
as a result I made you feel that you had to fight to be a part of what you
should have been the whole time. When I realized ..... God Heath, I was scared
to death I would wake up one morning and find your room empty ..... "
Nick's voice wavered, "I was afraid I would find my brother gone."
"I'm still
here."
Nick looked at
Heath, "Yes you are, you have no idea how happy that makes me."
"I'm not going
anywhere."
"No you're not,
not if I have any say so in the matter." Nick said matter-of-factly.
Heath felt the need
to lighten the mood, it was getting way too emotional, "What would you
have done if I'd a left?" Heath grinned.
"Gone after
your mangy hide and dragged you back to the ranch." Feeling the atmosphere
change, Nick gave a small grin.
Heath smiled,
"Kickin' and screamin'?"
"If I had
too." Nick smiled back, giving his ear a quick and thoughtful tug.
"You'd a had a
fight on your hands." Heath laughed.
"Naw, I would
have just thrown ya over my shoulder and marched ya back home ..... where ya
belong." Nick laughed.
Heath stopped laughing
and gave his brother a look, "You would have?"
"Yep."
Heath looked around
him, "Home ..... its got a nice ring ta it."
"I know a word
that has a much better ring to it." Nick said seriously.
Heath thought a
moment, "And what would that be?."
"Brother."
THE END