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Hilary
After a vigorous chase throughout the upstairs, Buffy manages to lose Spike by ducking into the hall bathroom. She sits on the edge of the tub, panting, and trying not to giggle as she waits for him to find her. Eventually, her giggles fade, and she's still waiting. And waiting. After about five minutes, she gets impatient.
BUFFY
(to herself)
Oh, come on.
She gets up to peek into the hallway. No sign of Spike.
BUFFY
(calling out)
You're not giving up that easily are you?
No answer. No Spike. The house is deadly quiet. A prickly fear nags at Buffy as she steps into the darkened hallway.
BUFFY
Spike?
Nothing.
BUFFY
Spike? What happened? Are you okay?
Still nothing. And she's getting a little worried. She enters Dawn's room and quickly snaps on the light. Nobody there. Next, she steps gingerly into her own room, snaps on the light, walks to the middle of the room and looks around.
BUFFY
Spike?
Nothing. Now she's getting pretty wigged out. She turns and is about to leave the room when...
WHOOSH!!
...Spike leaps out from behind the door and tackles her on to the bed. Buffy shrieks with laughter, very surprised but relieved to see him. He holds her close, with his arms around her from behind. She puts up a bit of a struggle... but it's clear she's not trying very hard.
SPIKE
I've got you now, Slayer!
BUFFY
You cheated!
SPIKE
Did not. I'm just better at being stealthy than you are. Don't think I couldn't hear you twittering away in that bathroom. Amateur.
BUFFY
Amateur? I don't think so. You just had to pull a sneak attack because you couldn't catch me.
SPIKE
Hey. I move like the wind, baby.
BUFFY
(mocking)
Like the wind, huh? Well, that's pretty darn fast.
Spike smiles and buries his face into Buffy's hair, speaking in a low growl against the back of her neck.
SPIKE
Don't believe me? Watch this.
He lets go of Buffy, who immediately tries to get away, but before she can even sit up, Spike flips her on to her back, pins her wrists over her head and straddles her.
SPIKE
See?
Very aroused butterflies are zipping around in Buffy's stomach, making it impossible for her not to giggle as she pretends to struggle.
BUFFY
Get off of me!
Spike advances, his face sinking closer and closer to hers. Buffy wriggles beneath him, shooting a current of pleasure through both their bodies. This only causes Buffy to laugh harder, as though she were being tickled.
BUFFY
(dramatic)
Unhand me you beast!
Spike pauses. Then with mock politeness:
SPIKE
Okay.
He moves to get up but Buffy grabs him by the shirt...
BUFFY
NO!
...and pulls him back down on top of her. They lock eyes. The old Spike smile slides across his face and she responds with an equally mischievous grin.
BUFFY
I changed my mind.
Spike can't take it anymore. He moans loudly and then crushes her mouth with an explosive kiss. The only thought he can manufacture in his head is, "I'm kissing Buffy." He lets go of her wrists to caress her face, almost needing to reassure himself that she's actually there. Buffy lets her newly liberated hands travel up his strong arms, over his shoulders, and then into his soft and slightly crunchy hair.
Suddenly, Buffy shifts and somehow manages to roll over on top of Spike, taking charge of the kiss. Deepening it. She's been waiting a long time for this. She can admit that to herself now. Four and a half years of repressed lust is being unleashed and this is no time to be timid. Slowly, she moves her hand down the front of his chest and dips the tips of her fingers under his waistband. She hears him groan and smiles against his mouth. Her hand reaches just far enough to catch hold of his tee shirt and pull it up, over his head. They have to break the kiss to remove the shirt, but as soon as it has cleared the kissing zone, they lock lips again, unable to bear the separation.
Buffy is amazed at how controlled and gentle Spike is being with her, only touching her face and stroking her hair as they kiss. It's unexpected and very sweet, but she's about to burst. She wants more. She takes his hand and gently presses it to her breast. He removes it and touches her face again. With some impatience, she takes his hand again and puts it back on her breast. Spike breaks the kiss.
SPIKE
Buffy.
BUFFY
(anxious; out of breath)
What? What's the matter?
SPIKE
I - I have to... There's something you need to know.
Buffy looks down at him curiously.
~MOMENTS LATER~
Buffy and Spike are now sitting up on the bed, side by side. Spike looks down at his hands, embarrassed. Buffy looks a little stunned.
BUFFY
Wow.
SPIKE
Yeah.
BUFFY
Wow.
SPIKE
You said that already.
BUFFY
I know, but... wow!
SPIKE
Bloody hell! It's not that big of a deal. You act like I told you I was a sodding eunuch!
BUFFY
I'm sorry.
Buffy puts her hand on his shoulder, but he shrugs it off.
BUFFY
Hey. I'm sorry, okay? It's just a little hard for me to... comprehend. So... you're sure?
SPIKE
Of course I'm sure. I was there, wasn't I!
BUFFY
This isn't a joke.
SPIKE
If you think this is my idea of a joke then I must not be as funny as I think I am.
BUFFY
Drucilla was your first?
SPIKE
After I became a vampire, yeah.
BUFFY
And you never...
SPIKE
Not as a human. Or with a human. No.
BUFFY
But as a vampire you were... like...
SPIKE
Well, yeah, of course! Dru and I had some really wild times, right? And then Harmony, she was... well we did some pretty crazy stuff too, so it's not like I'm--
BUFFY
Wait a minute... just Dru and Harmony?
SPIKE
What's that supposed to mean, "JUST Dru and Harmony?"
BUFFY
Well, they were your 'steadies' or whatever you want to call it, but you've been with other female vampires, haven't you?
SPIKE
Do you really think Dru would have let me live if I'd shagged some strumpet while I was still with her?
BUFFY
But I would think she would encourage that kind of thing. The vampire world being so... erotic and all.
SPIKE
(rolling eyes)
Oh God. Deliver me from Anne Rice.
Buffy watches him a moment. Completely nonplused.
BUFFY
So no one before you met Harmony, either?
SPIKE
Buffy, I only started dating Harmony because she reminded me of you.
BUFFY
Okay... not so much a compliment.
SPIKE
You know what I mean.
BUFFY
So you're serious.
SPIKE
I'm serious.
BUFFY
Why are you telling me this?
Spike gathers his courage.
SPIKE
Because... I'm bloody human now. And If what I think is going to happen between us is really going to happen, it will be my... first time... as a human. And I'm just worried about doing something stupid. God only knows if I can keep this ridiculous body under control. So, I just wanted you to be aware that, if I do screw up, it's only because I need a little... practice.
Buffy watches his face long enough to make him a little uncomfortable. Finally:
BUFFY
If this is some scam to get me to fall for you--
Spike starts to protest.
BUFFY
--it's working.
Spike finally looks into her eyes and is beyond relieved when he sees her smiling sweetly back at him. He allowed his vulnerable side to show and everything turned out all right. There are no more distractions, now. He reaches out, puts his hand behind her head and pulls her mouth to his for another intense kiss. When they break apart, she presses her forehead to Spike's.
BUFFY
(breathless)
You sure do kiss well for a virgin.
Spike laughs good-naturedly and Buffy follows suit. They kiss again, mid-laugh, and it turns into something less funny. Buffy puts Spike's hand on her breast again. Spike removes his hand... so that he can slide it up under her blouse and caress her bare skin. With his free hand, he lays her down on the bed and starts to place baby kisses her along her jaw line as he strokes and teases her sensitive flesh. Buffy is flying.
BUFFY
(gasping)
Oh, Spike.
MAIN STREET - SAME TIME
WILLOW
WHAT?!
TARA
Shhh!
Willow, Tara and Xander are on Patrol in one section of the town. With Xander out of earshot, Tara has just updated Willow on the status of Spike and Buffy.
WILLOW
(whisper)
What exactly did you see?
TARA
Nothing really. Just a couple of looks. But it was so obvious.
WILLOW
Well, apparently not that obvious, because -- Hey! In the dark!
TARA
Don't take it personally, Sweetie. They'll probably let us in on it eventually. I think they were kind of enjoying their little secret.
WILLOW
Why are you so happy about this? Do you think it's a good idea? I mean... they may just be regular humans now, but she's still Buffy and he's still Spike.
TARA
But, don't you think they're kinda... right for each other?
WILLOW
Buffy and Spike are right for each other? How can you... well... okay I can maybe see how you might think that, but... actually, I've never really thought about it before... they kinda are, aren't they?
For a moment, Willow is lost in thought, romanticizing, but she quickly shakes it off.
WILLOW
No... because what if things go back to the way they were before the earthquake? Spike will be a vampire again and Buffy will be a slayer. Two things that are so not right for each other... like... at all.
TARA
Well, wasn't Angel a vampire?
WILLOW
Yeah, but... witness the him not being here anymore.
TARA
I guess you're right. I don't know. There's just something about those two.
XANDER
(walking up from behind)
Something about who two?
WILLOW
Nobody!
TARA
Just these... two people we know... from school. They're trying to keep their relationship a secret.
XANDER
Why? What's the big?
Xander is only sort of paying attention. He's busy scanning the perimeter of Main Street, looking for crime to fight.
WILLOW
Well, they're from different... worlds.
XANDER
Ha! Different worlds? Anya and I aren't even from the same dimension and look at us. There is just no impediment to true love.
WILLOW
You really believe that?
XANDER
Sure I do.
Beat.
WILLOW
Buffy and Spike are getting it on.
Duty forgotten, Xander stops abruptly and focuses on the girls.
XANDER
WHAT!?
TARA
Willow!
WILLOW
He said 'no impediment.'
(to Xander)
You said 'no impediment' didn't you?
XANDER
I didn't mean them! Not them! They're not from different worlds they're from... opposite sides of... something really huge!
TARA
You guys! Buffy and Spike are not getting it on! At least... they weren't an hour ago.
XANDER
Oh my God! What do you know? Do you have information? Is that why the fake yawning? I thought Buffy was just bored with Giles' incessant yammering. Because, hey, weren't we all... but... I'm going to Buffy's.
TARA/WILLOW
No!/Why?
XANDER
I'm going to stop her from making a huge mistake!
WILLOW
XANDER!
XANDER
What?
CRASH!!! The sound of heavy glass breaking.
They all whip around to see a balding man in his late thirties hop through the store window he just smashed, grab a vacuum cleaner from the display and hop out again with his booty.
WILLOW
I was just gonna say... maybe we should take care of this looting problem first.
Xander narrows his eyes at Willow, then turns his attention to the looter.
XANDER
Hey! What are you doing there?
LOOTING GUY
What do you care, man? Mind your business.
XANDER
Last time I checked, stealing was still illegal.
LOOTING GUY
(laughing)
Who are you, McGruff the Crime Dog? You gonna take a bite out of my ass, now? I just needed a vacuum cleaner.
XANDER
(advancing on him)
So buy one.
Looting Guy realizes he's being challenged.
LOOTING GUY
I don't feel like it.
He takes a few steps toward Xander and throws the vacuum aside... smashing it.
LOOTING GUY
Forget it. I heard that one sucks anyway.
XANDER
HEY! You're not allowed to use vacuum related puns! Only the good guys get to use puns.
LOOTING GUY
Oh, I get it, you're the good guy, right? Well, hate to break it to you pal, but around here... everybody's Superman.
This strikes a nerve with Xander and he attacks. Really attacks, using moves he learned from his day as a soldier that would stop a three-hundred pound demon in it's tracks. Looting Guy holds his own for a while, but ultimately falters under Xander's experience. He's getting the crap kicked out of him.
After a few tense moments, Willow decides to intervene before Xander does something he'll regret.
WILLOW
Separate!
Xander and Looting Guy fly apart. Xander looks over at Willow angrily, but when their eyes meet he realizes what what he was doing. Dazed, he looks over at the Looting Guy who is holding his side and wiping a bloody lip.
LOOTING GUY
What the hell's the matter with you, man? It's just a frigging vacuum cleaner. Get a grip.
XANDER
I - I'm sorry.
LOOTING GUY
Yeah, you're sorry all right.
Looting guy starts to walk away.
XANDER
(feebly)
Stealing is wrong!
Looting guy waves him off as he stumbles out of sight.
LOOTING GUY
(mumbling)
Frigging boy scout.
When he's gone, there is awkward silence among the three super-scoobies. Then:
XANDER
(quietly)
I don't know how she did it.
TARA
Who?
XANDER
Buffy! Every day, she walked around with this power, and she never let it get out of hand. She could literally do whatever she wanted, whenever she wanted, but she kept it under control. I never thought about how hard it was for her. I guess that's why they don't hand the power out to just any Tom, Dick or Xander that comes down the pike. I mean, from this perspective, even Spike looks like Mr. Restraint. And you know I've lost it when I start saying stuff like that!
Willow smiles and goes over to put a hand on Xander's shoulder.
WILLOW
Sounds like you're about ready for things to go back to normal, huh?
XANDER
I hate to say it, but yeah... I definitely think I'm ready.
BUFFY'S BEDROOM - THE NEXT MORNING
Sunlight peeks through the curtains of Buffy's bedroom window and falls softly on the hills and valleys of the rumpled bed. Buffy is curled up, asleep on her side. Spike is facing her, but his eyes are open, he's watching her sleep. After a little while, Buffy stirs slightly and senses him. Slowly, she opens her heavy-lidded eyes, and smiles.
BUFFY
You're looking at me.
SPIKE
Yeah.
BUFFY
Do I have bed head?
Spike reaches out to run a hand through her hair.
SPIKE
Yeah. You look like hell.
Buffy snorts out a surprised laugh and gives Spike a good hard whack on the chest.
SPIKE
OW!!
She snuggles back down into her pillow.
BUFFY
You deserved it.
Spike takes her hand and intertwines it with his own, then kisses the tips of her fingers.
SPIKE
Actually luv, you've never looked more beautiful.
BUFFY
Mmmm. That's better.
She scooches closer to him and he envelopes her in his arms, letting her nestle her face against his chest.
SPIKE
Knew that'd get you.
BUFFY
Yeah... I mean... hey! I think I have to hit you again.
SPIKE
Well, go on then, I can take it.
Buffy thinks about it, then closes her eyes and gets more comfortable in Spike's arms.
BUFFY
This is more fun.
Spike gives her a reassuring squeeze.
SPIKE
I really have to agree. You're so warm.
BUFFY
Ninety-eight point six, even.
Spike chuckles softly.
SPIKE
Guess I'm not used to that. (thoughtful pause) I think I'm still waiting to wake up.
Buffy pulls back to look at him.
BUFFY
What?
SPIKE
This is too good to be true. I have to be dreaming.
Buffy looks deeply into his eyes, then presses her mouth to his for a sweet, lingering kiss. When they pull away:
BUFFY
Morning breath. That real enough for you?
Spike laughs out loud and shakes his head at her.
SPIKE
You're so odd... I love you.
Buffy stops smiling. Spike picks up on the mood change.
SPIKE
Sorry. I - I shouldn't have--
BUFFY
No, it's okay, it's just... been a while since I've heard you say that. Kind of stopped my heart there for a second.
He looks at her, unsure.
BUFFY
Say it again.
Spike's own heart leaps in his chest. He props himself up on his elbow so that he can look down into her eyes.
SPIKE
I love you.
He leans down and kisses her forehead, then her eyebrow, then her earlobe, then her chin. Each time telling her:
SPIKE
I love you.
She allows a shuddering sigh to escape her body, the last of the tension draining away as Spike nibbles at her neck and shoulder and slides a hand under the covers, resting his palm on her bare thigh.
BUFFY
(dreamily)
Spike?
SPIKE
(could this be it?)
Yeah?
DAWN (O.C.)
HELLO!
They hear Dawn's voice from downstairs and both sit bolt upright in bed. Frantic, they look at each other, realize they're naked, and cower back down under the covers.
DAWN (O.C.)
Where is everyone? Buffy? Spike?
Buffy is gesturing wildly for Spike to get out of bed but he draws attention to the fact that he is stark naked by throwing the covers off of himself and quickly covering back up again. Buffy thinks for a minute... then starts pushing Spike over the side of the bed until he falls ungracefully on to the floor.
SPIKE
(hoarse whisper)
Bloody Hell!
BUFFY
Shhh! Shut up! (calling out) In here Dawn! (under her breath) Don't move.
SPIKE
At least give me a bit of sheet!
Buffy quickly balls up a sheet and slam dunks it over the side of the bed, right onto Spike's stomach. He coughs!
BUFFY
Will you be quiet!?
SPIKE
(whimpering)
My spleen.
BUFFY
Dammit, Spike, I don't want Dawn to know about this yet. This is not a good example to be setting for a fifteen year old girl. So will you, for God's sake-- Hi Dawn!
DAWN
Who were you talking to?
BUFFY
Uhhh... you! I said, "I'm in here... for God's sake."
DAWN
Where's Spike?
BUFFY
(too casual)
I don't know. I thought you weren't coming home till this afternoon?
DAWN
Anya was driving me nuts. She had me up half the night pretending to be different guests on her talk show. She's kind of unraveling I think. Cabin fever or something. Xander was there this morning, so I took my cue to bail. I think they wanted to have sex.
BUFFY
DAWN! GOD!! Just because two people are alone in a house together, it doesn't mean they're going to have sex!
From his hiding place, Spike hears this and rolls his eyes. Buffy is really over-doing it and Dawn can sense the weirdness.
DAWN
Yeah. Okay. Well... I was gonna make those pancakes with the cute shapes again. You hungry?
BUFFY
Starving! You go ahead and get started, I'll be right down.
DAWN
Okay.
She turns to walk away then stops, turns back, and addresses the room.
DAWN
Hey Spike, I know you hate pancakes, so do you want scrambled eggs or that disgusting cereal you always eat?
Buffy is flabbergasted. She has no words. Spike pokes his head out from his hiding place beside the bed, careful to remain mostly concealed.
SPIKE
Um... eggs would be nice. Thanks, Niblet.
DAWN
No prob. See you down there.
Dawn smiles at Buffy and skips happily away. A stunned Buffy looks over at Spike who shrugs.
SPIKE
Observant little tike, isn't she?