You Are My Angel

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Disclaimer: I own nothing but the plot & Cassandra. Everything else belongs to Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, the WB, etc.

Feedback: python_chick@hotmail.com

Mush Alert: In this story, I wanted everything to end somewhat happily so beware!

~~ Chapter One ~~

It was Thursday morning and Angel sat reading the letter Willow had written him, updating him on the situation in Sunnydale.

"Dear Angel,

We have yet another demon that's after Buffy to deal with, but it's different this time. She needs your help because she's lost her Slayer abilities." Angel's eyes grew wide and he stood up. Not his Buffy! "I guess you're wondering why this guy's after her, huh? Well she killed his brother a while ago and he finally found her. Sort of a revenge deal. The new Slayer's here but she's not strong enough to handle him herself. Oh yeah, I'm her Watcher! Isn't that cool? Well anyway, there's no immediate danger since she moved into a new apartment and it doesn't know where she lives. But we would appreciate it if you could come help us. Buffy doesn't know I'm writing this, but we Scoobies need help protecting her. Thanks. Willow."

Angel dropped the letter on his desk and called Cordelia on the phone. "Cordy, pack some clothes; we're going to Sunnydale. Call Wesley and tell him we're going and that he should stay and keep things in order here."

"Angel, I don't want to go...and what if Wesley has a vision?" Cordelia protested. Wesley had received Cordelia's visions from her when they dated temporarily a few years ago. They were both glad that the switch had taken place since Wesley could identify the demons easier and Cordelia hated the splitting headaches.

"Just do it," he snapped at her. "Buffy's in trouble. I'll call Gunn." They hung up and called their friends. In the afternoon they left for Sunnydale in Angel's sun-proof car.

"So who's Buffy?" Gunn asked while Angel was driving.

Cordelia whispered in his ear. "She's Angel's old girlfriend. They got pretty hot and heavy and he turned evil when they--well, you know...perfect happiness. I told you about her before."

"Oh, her." he whispered back.

"You know I can hear you guys, even without my vampire hearing," Angel said with a smirk. "It's nice to know you fill Gunn in on all the info that's not case-related too, Cordelia."

"Well, he should know, just in case it happens again." she defended herself.

"It won't happen again. And no more talking about Buffy." Angel ordered.

Cordelia sat in the front passenger seat silently. *This is going to be a long trip.* she thought to herself.

~~ Chapter Two ~~

"You what?!" Buffy exclaimed walking into Giles' magic shop. It was just after 9pm and the sun was already down. "Willow, how could you?!"

"B-Buffy," Willow stuttered. "You weren't supposed to hear that."

"Oh, well I'll just pretend I don't know that my ex-boyfriend is coming to Sunnydale to protect me." she said sarcastically. Her face softened a little. "Well, when's he getting here?"

"Right about now," she heard a voice behind her and there stood Angel in the doorway, dressed in his usual black attire and his leather duster.

They entered the shop carrying a load of stakes and crosses. Buffy looked at Gunn's full arms. "Geez, guys, what did you tell him about Sunnydale? It looks like you're ready for another Harvest." Buffy joked. Nobody laughed.

Cassandra broke the silence. "You're a vampire!" she said narrowing her eyes at Angel and grabbing a stake from her belt.

"No Cass, it's ok, he's a good vamp." Xander said putting his hand on her stake.

"But you said there are no good vamps, just weak ones." she quoted him.

Xander let out an embarrassed chuckle. "Um, Angel, I don't know where she got that from."

"I see you're still trying to brainwash the girls of Sunnydale, Xander." Cordelia stepped in. "Hasn't worked in your favor yet, huh, Xander?"

"Xander and I dated for a few years, but I dumped him a couple weeks ago." Anya said honestly, standing behind the register. Xander gave her a sarcastic 'thank-you' smile.

"Hey I remember you, you almost destroyed Sunnydale," Cordelia said to Anya.

"It was your wish, I just granted it." Anya argued back. "If I had known it would get my pendant destroyed I wouldn't have done it."

"That's enough!" everyone turned to look at Giles. He hardly ever got impatient and everyone was surprised, even Angel.

"So what's up?" he asked casually. "Have you found out what kind of demon it is yet?"

"Not really," Willow said. "But we know it's really big."

"You haven't seen it yet?" Gunn asked.

"Not very well, but it's the last demon's brother so we're guessing it's the same kind." Xander said.

"Well it may not be," Angel replied. "Most demons don't usually remain faithful to one partner."

Buffy silently stared at Angel. "I'm going to go work out for a bit. If you find out anything, let me know." she said as she stood up.

Angel looked up at her from where he was sitting. "Well, it's dangerous out there Buffy, you shouldn't go alone. I'll-"

"It's ok Angel, there's a gym in the back room. Riley, Xander and Giles built it for me." she said smiling at Xander and Giles.

"Oh," was all he could say. "So, where is Riley?" he asked, trying to sound casual after Buffy left the room.

Everybody looked at each other, unsure of what to say. Finally Cassandra spoke up. "Riley broke up with Buffy a couple of years ago cause she was still in love with her old boyfriend." she said not realizing that's who Angel was. Angel looked at the ground and smiled a little but quickly removed it when he realized that everybody was staring at him.

"Uh, Cass?" Willow spoke up. "Why don't you go patrol the graveyard, there should be some 'new arrivals'." she said.

"Sure thing, boss." she said rolling her eyes. "I never get to be around the interesting stuff. It's always vampires, demons, and homework." she complained while leaving the magic shop.

~~ Chapter Three ~~

Buffy worked out in her private gym as the radio played. She grunted as she kicked and punched the bags and the stuffed man that Xander had made for her.

"Well aren't you a sight for sore eyes." a man's voice said. Buffy jumped at the voice and spun around to face the man who it belonged to.

She smiled and ran up to him. They shared a long passionate kiss and finally broke apart. "Do you know how long I've waited to see you again?" she asked him.

"Sorry, baby, but it's not my fault I can't visit you in the daytime, unless you want to make out with a pile of dust." he said smiling at her. "But it's worth the wait isn't it? They say that absence makes the heart grow fonder."

"Who are they?" Buffy asked her lover.

"I don't know, those people that say things like that I guess." he replied then asked, "Have you been working out long?"

"Not really, about 20 minutes. I don't have the energy that I used to, but I'm holding up. I think that's good enough for tonight," Buffy answered. "Are you hungry?"

"A little, but let's go somewhere else more private." he said, looking around the training area.

"I gotta stay, we're trying to find out what this demon is." she looked down at her shoes sadly.

He cupped her chin and lifted her head to look into her eyes. "You are so beautiful. I don't know why anyone would want to hurt you." he said sincerely.

She put her arms around his waist and laid her head on his chest. "You used to want to." she mocked, breathing in his cologne.

"But that was before I knew you." he said softly.

"I have to shower, I feel icky," she said, standing away from him. She looked at him slyly. "I could use a little help with that hard-to-reach spot on my back."

"I guess I could lend a hand or two." he said, taking her hand and walking towards the bathroom in the back of the gym. Neither of them saw Angel standing in the doorway. *Buffy and Spike are involved? I thought I was her Angel.* he thought sadly.

* * * * *

In the shower, Buffy spoke softly. "Angel's here. I didn't know until about half an hour ago."

"Peaches?" Spike asked with a surprised look on his face. "So what brings that pouf back to Sunnyhell?"

"Willow told him to come back and help find this demon. Are you jealous?" Buffy asked.

"Who, me? Of that eunuch? Not bloody likely," he said with an unsure tone. "Do you still love him?"

"I don't know--Spike, we had an arrangement. After you got that chip out, I would let you drink my blood if you would stop killing innocent people." she continued. "Our arrangement became physical and we promised that there would be no strings attached. Are you telling me that you have developed--strings?"

He looked into her eyes. "Look, Slayer, I don't have mushy feelings for you, but I don't want that idiot to hurt you anymore than he has. Sorry if I've started to care."

Buffy ran her hands through his wet hair. "That's really sweet, Spike. Please try to get along with him for now, okay?"

"For your sake." he said.

"Now kiss me. And I'll let you have your dinner." she told him and moved her hands to his shoulders.

"Yes ma'am." he said. He wrapped his strong arms around her and followed through with his order.

Her kisses were filled with hunger. Hunger for Angel? She wasn't sure. Spike didn't notice. He was lost in the sensations of loving her.

~~ Chapter Four ~~

Buffy and Spike entered the main room of the magic shop where everyone was sitting, discussing the current problem. Buffy was toweling dry her hair but Spike's was already dry. Angel kept his eyes glued to his book, not wanting to look at either of them.

"Anything new?" Buffy asked.

"Well, we know that it's not a Thorak Demon because it's about the same height as a three-year-old." Xander stated happily.

"Xander, that's not exactly a huge accomplishment compared to the number of demons there are on Earth." Cordelia said.

"Yeah and what have you found out?" he bit.

"You guys haven't changed a bit since high school, have you?" Spike said. "Too bad there aren't any closets here for you--"

He was cut off when Buffy glared at him. "Quiet Spike, don't start anything!" she whispered.

"Sorry, pet." he apologized. Angel cringed at the nickname and glanced up at Buffy. He noticed a fresh bite mark on her neck. *I'll kill that bastard.* He thought to himself and wondered if everybody else knew what was going on between them.

"Spike and I will go look for this-thing. Maybe we'll be lucky and see it." Buffy suggested.

"Okay, but be careful and come back as soon as you've got something or if you're in trouble." her ex-watcher said, removing his glasses to clean them.

"Yeah, yeah, I know the speech Giles," Buffy replied. She grabbed her jacket off the counter, which Anya was still standing behind. "Hey Ahn, why are you still at the register?" she asked the ex-demon.

She looked at her watch. "I still have five minutes left on my shift." she said.

"It's okay Anya, you can sit down now. Nobody comes around this late anymore, if they ever did." he sighed to himself.

"Oh good." she said with a deep sigh. She sat down beside Xander and flaunted herself to Angel. Cordelia rolled her eyes.

Buffy and Spike left the shop.

"I'll go with them too," Angel said quickly, not wanting them to go out together. "Just in case they can't fight him off by themselves."

*Could he be more desperate?* Cordelia thought, rolling her eyes. She too wondered if there was more to Spike and Buffy's 'friendship'. Angel quickly walked out of the store with his leather duster flowing behind him. Anya frowned. *He didn't even glance at me.* she thought.

Gunn looked at everyone and asked, "Was that the most bizarre love triangle you have ever heard of?"

"Yeah I can see it now: 'Next week on Jerry Springer. I am in love with my ex-boyfriend's demon grandchilde.' Now that's entertainment." Cordelia mocked.

"Well actually, Spike and Buffy aren't in love. They just like each other a lot. It's just a temporary arrangement." Willow explained.

"Yeah, they just have sex. They're relationship is completely physical." Anya said before anyone could stop her.

"Oh," Cordelia said, sitting back in her chair. "Please do tell. That way I won't have to find out about it from Angel."

"Angel knows already?" Xander asked, looking at Willow.

"Hey, don't look at me. I didn't say a thing!" she defended herself.

"Believe me, Angel can tell when someone has had sex and who they had it with." Cordelia stated matter-of-factly. Everybody looked at Cordelia with strange looks. "Well, he could with Wesley. It was gross, yet interesting."

"Too much information!" Giles interrupted her. "Let's try to cross a few more suspects off the list shall we?"

Oz strolled into the shop. He had just finished playing at The Bronze with his popular band. "Hey," he said quietly.

Willow looked up and smiled at him. "Hi Oz," she said. "You wanna help us find this demon?"

"Sure," he responded.

"Still as quiet as you used to be, Oz?" Cordelia asked smiling. Oz just shrugged his shoulders.

"Here's a book," Willow said handing him one book from the many piles cluttering up a small round table. "Right now, we're just eliminating the little guys, since we know this one isn't little."

Gunn leaned over to Cordelia's ear to whisper something. "It's gonna be a long night." Cordelia just smiled and nodded slightly. She knew what they were in for.

~~ Chapter Five ~~

Buffy and Spike walked hand in hand down the dimly lit street, unaware that Angel was hiding in the shadows.

"So how do we find this asshole?" Spike asked Buffy, peering down the alleyways that they passed.

"Well if he's actually following through with this threat, then he will find us." she sighed, leaning against his right shoulder.

They stopped walking in front of an alley. "Don't worry, ducks, I won't let the bugger hurt you." he said leaning down to give her a kiss.

Angel came around the corner and witnessed their share of affection. His heart nearly broke in two and he closed his eyes. *I'll find this creep, Buffy. Then you'll be mine again.* He turned around and headed off to find Willy the snitch. Spike and Buffy continued walking down the street and turned the next corner. If Angel had stayed a second longer, he would have seen the enormous figure step out from the alley and follow the couple around the corner.

* * * * *

"OW!" Willy exclaimed after receiving a right hook from Angel. "I told you I don't know about any demons going after her!"

"You know, Willy, I believe you, but I don't think my fist does." Angel said raising his right fist while grabbing Willy with his left one.

"Wait! Okay, okay, I'll tell you. So there's this really big demon, and he's real sore about the Slayer killing his brother a while ago, some Toth guy. Anyway, he wants to kill her cause he was his only brother."

"Where can I find him?" Angel asked in a low growl, trying to keep the demon within him from surfacing.

"I don't know, he stays in an old warehouse by the city dump." Willy closed his eyes expecting another punch. But Angel just let him go and stalked out of the bar.

"Geez, just when I thought I'd gotten rid of that guy." Willy said watching him leave while holding his sore face.

* * * * *

Angel burst through to doors of the magic shop. "I know where this thing lives!" he blurted out to everyone.

"Finally! One more book and I would have gone crazy!" Cordelia let out a relieved sigh. "Like I haven't seen enough of these books back in LA."

"Where Angel?" Giles asked, standing up.

"It's down by--" he started

"It's a Mohra demon!" Spike yelled, carrying a bruised and bloody Buffy through the doorway and around Angel's frozen stance. "Let's get some help here, people!" Spike shouted as everybody started at her quivering form. "I think she'll be okay, she just got knocked around a bit until I interfered." Spike said laying her down on the floor and wiping the blood off of her face with a handkerchief. He cradled her body close to his. It was then that everybody noticed Spike's bloody nose and bruised left eye.

"What happened?" Willow asked, almost at the point of crying.

"We were walking down the street when this big guy came out of nowhere. He slammed Buffy against a wall and she tried to defend herself, but she couldn't. I grabbed his sword and stabbed him in his side. Then he ran off." Spike stroked the side of her face then stood up, resting her head on his leather jacket. "There was blood everywhere! His mostly. I collected some and fed it to her. It will help her heal faster."

"He attacked you when you were sucking face, idiot." Angel mumbled under his breath, forgetting that Spike was able to hear him.

"You followed us? You hid in the shadows and fucking followed us?! And you didn't do anything to help her?!" Spike hollered at the top of his lungs.

"I left before it happened, Spike!" Angel yelled back.

"Calm down everybody," Giles said. "This won't help Buffy."

"Sod off, Angel. You don't belong here!" Spike said bitterly stalking towards Angel. They were standing face to face.

"Look! I went to find out what this thing was, how was I supposed to know--" Angel argued.

"Just go!" Spike said pointing to the door, barely containing his rage.

Defeated, Angel turned and left the store. He got into his car and drove off in search of the bastard that hurt his former lover.

"That was a bit harsh, Spike," Xander spoke up. "We may have needed his help to fight--"

"Help to fight, huh? Well I didn't see him helping when Buffy screamed his name, not mine," he said on the verge of tears. "Or when she collapsed on the floor after being beaten by that--that--THING! I was the one to fight it off; I was the one to save her life. Who needs him!" He paced around the room while a tear ran slowly down his cheek. "Dammit! I LOVE her! I CAN'T lose her. I'd go crazy without her!"

*Wow!* thought Willow. *He really does love her.*

~~ Chapter Six ~~

When Buffy awoke, she was lying on the magic shop floor. Everybody was sitting in chairs around the table and Spike was lying next to her, asleep. His right arm was holding her body close to his and he looked as if he'd been crying. She looked around again; everybody looked like they'd been crying. Willow was in Oz's lap with her arms around his neck and her head nestled on his chest. His arms were wrapped protectively around her waist.

Xander was sitting in a chair with his feet resting on the table. One of his hands was holding Cordelia's. She sat on his left and her head was resting on his shoulder. Anya sat on the other side of Xander with her head resting on her arms on top of a book. Giles was sitting in a chair with his hand holding his head, his elbow resting on the armrest. Gunn wasn't in the room but she heard him in the gym, working out and talking to the dummy as if were the demon.

She sat up suddenly, wondering where Angel was. Her head pounded and begged her to lay back down. She pressed her hand to her temple and felt some bandages wrapped around her head. Spike's arm slipped off her and she quietly made her way to the training area.

As she opened the door she saw Gunn, beating the dummy to a pulp. "Stupid demon! Hurt my friends, will you? Take this!" he said kicking the dummy's stomach.

She cleared her throat to alert him of her presence. She always hated being sneaked up on and thought it was the decent thing to do.

Gunn spun around and relaxed his stance when he saw her frail figure leaning against the doorframe. He felt his face grow hot from embarrassment.

"Hey, you're awake. They all fell asleep waiting for you to get up but I decided to tune up my skills. If these things can kick a Slayer and a vampire's ass, what chance do I have?" he joked.

"I know Spike's fine but was Cass badly hurt?" she asked concerned.

"No I mean when you and Angel fought one in LA, last time you were--oh shit." he cut himself off after realizing Buffy didn't remember Angel's day as a human.

But he was wrong. Buffy had remembered their whole day together. It came back to her one night in a dream. "It's okay Gunn, I remember everything. But who told you?" she asked.

"Cordelia...who else? She's told me a lot of stuff I don't really need to hear about Angel." he smirked.

"Sounds just like her. Speaking of the demon, do you know where he is?" she asked looking around the gym. "I need to talk to him."

"Um, well he took off. Spike kicked him out." Gunn said, removing his boxing tape. "You should probably go tell everyone that you're awake, they were pretty worried about you."

"Yeah, thanks." she said distractedly. *Why would Spike kick him out? He's probably just jealous. That little liar.* She thought. "There's a shower in the back if you want to get cleaned up after your workout." she said turning back to the magic shop's main room.

"Thanks," he called after her.

* * * * *

Angel sped through the city in his convertible, following the scent of the Mohra demon's blood. *I'm so close, I can feel it.* He thought as he drove nearer and nearer to the city dump. Without realizing it, he passed by an old, condemned warehouse. He screeched to a stop in the middle of the road, U-turned, and drove into the warehouse parking lot. He shut off the engine and grabbed a long sword out of the backseat. The smell of the demon's blood was incredibly strong now; he had to be inside. Angel took a deep, unneeded breath and prepared himself to go fight the demon. *I killed one before; and I can do it again.* he thought.

~~ Chapter Seven ~~

"Spike?" Buffy shook him gently, trying to wake him up. His eyes opened almost immediately and he sat up to hold her close. "It's okay, Spike, I'm fine." she said smiling.

He didn't let go of his hold on her; he just rocked her gently. "I thought I'd lost you for a minute, Love." he said smiling. He kissed her gently on the lips.

"Hey, I'm stronger than that. You can't get rid of me that easily," she said smiling and then became serious. "But for now, I need to know where Angel went. Gunn told me you kicked him out."

"I don't know, he just left. I kicked him out because--" he started.

Buffy placed a finger on his lips to silence him. "Look, we can talk later, but right now we're still in trouble. That includes Angel."

"You still love him don't you?" he asked bravely, trying to hide his feelings for Buffy from her.

"I. Said. Later." she said slowly. She meant business and Spike knew that. He stood up and they woke up everybody.

"Hey you guys, I feel really, really strong, I think that blood Spike fed me gave me back temporary Slayer powers. Let's use 'em while they're visiting." she said grabbing an axe off the wall.

"How did you know that he fed it to you?" Cordelia asked.

Buffy made a sour face. "The aftertaste is horrible. Did you think something that powerful would taste like chocolate?"

* * * * *

Back at the warehouse, Angel was prepared to enter. He quietly opened a side door and peered in. The Mohra demon was drinking water. No. It was salt water; Angel could smell it. *Okay, I have to destroy its jewel.* he thought, blocking out everything but Buffy. His memories of her and Spike stayed fresh in his mind, and empowered him to fight the demon before his eyes. He entered the building and shut the door behind him.

"Hey Mohra! Why don't you leave Buffy alone and pick on a demon your own size?" he challenged.

The huge demon turned around and when he saw Angel, he crushed the glass in his hand. Salt water spilled on the floor, mixed with its green blood, oozing from the cuts on his hand from the glass. The demon roared and lunged at Angel. He dodged to the left and spun around and hit the demon on the back with his sword. Mohra didn't even flinch. It spun around and hit Angel with an uppercut, sending him crashing into a wall about thirty feet away.

Angel grunted and fell to the floor. He slowly stood up, blood slowly seeping from his lower lip. "Now you've upset me." he said calmly, before morphing into his demon visage.

The Mohra laughed loudly. "You think you can kill me all by your soulful self?"

"I'm not sure, but I'm willing to give it a shot." he said as he brushed himself off. "You game?"

The Mohra answered by stampeding directly at Angel. The vampire picked up his sword only to have it knocked out of his hand and across the floor.

"Angel!" cried Buffy stepping through the door followed by Spike and Gunn.

Angel dodged under the Mohra's arm, it's punch slammed through a few layers of the wall. He growled furiously as Angel ran over to the new arrivals.

"We have to smash the jewel on its forehead," he said quickly. Gunn ran off to fight the demon, carrying his homemade axe.

Spike looked over at Buffy whose face was still badly bruised. "Oh I'll smash more than just the damn jewel."

"Buffy, get out of here, you'll get hurt again." Angel said pointing to the door.

"It's fine Angel, I still have some Slayer power left." she said rushing off to help Gunn.

The three spread out around the demon. It stopped fighting Gunn and looked around, not liking the odds against it. "Now!" Spike yelled as everybody attacked at once, stabbing and whacking the ugly monster with all their strength. The demon stood up and hit their weapons aside. Angel punched his jewel with his fist, hoping that would be enough to kill it. Instead, he screamed in pain and pulled his nearly broken hand back. *It's a good thing I heal fast.* he thought. He looked up at the demon just as it hit him again, sending him flying through the air and landing on his back, on top of a double-edged axe. The axe pierced through his stomach, and his dark blood seeped on to the floor. All he could do was watch the fight.

Spike and Gunn quickly went to retrieve their weapons, leaving Buffy fighting the demon, hand to hand. He threw a right punch but she blocked and countered hitting him square in the jaw. That was it. The demon had had enough; even a girl was beating him.

He hit Buffy with a backhand slap, causing her to fall next to Angel lying on the floor. "Buffy," he said weakly. "Take the axe, I'll be fine."

Buffy looked at Angel for a minute then rolled him over carefully and removed the axe from his back and stood up to fight the demon. But Gunn beat her to it and had just delivered the final blow to the red gem on the Mohra's head. It screamed in pain as Hellfire consumed it. A few seconds later, there was nothing left of it but the blood on the floor. The green blood was slowly mixing itself with Angel's blood and making its way to his battered body.

~~ Chapter Eight ~~

Buffy saw Spike crumpled against the wall. When had he been hit? When she was removing the axe from Angel's body? She kneeled down and laid his head on her lap. There was dark blood flowing from the back of his head. She looked around her and noticed there was more of his blood surrounding her. *He'll never recover without my blood.* She thought as she saw his eyes flutter open and closed between consciousness.

"Spike," she whispered. "You have to drink from me, it's the only thing that will save you."

His vampire face was still showing and she brought her wrist down to his mouth. She pressed her arm into his fangs as blood seeped from the puncture marks. When the first few drops fell onto his tongue, his eyes opened and he grabbed her wrist. Spike was too weak to control the demon inside of him as it drank greedily from Buffy's wrist. She closed her eyes as the pain registered in her brain.

Gunn saw the green blood slowly spreading to Angel and remembered that it would make him human again. *He'll die from that wound if he becomes mortal.* He thought and tried to move him away from it. It was too late and the blood had already made contact with Angel's huge gash. He writhed in pain, as his body slowly became human. Blood poured from his back easier now that his heart was pumping it through his body. "Buffy!" Gunn yelled. "Angel's human, and he's dying!"

Buffy pulled her wrist from Spike's grasp. He had drunk enough to survive now. Her main concern was Angel. She rushed over to Angel and kneeled down beside him. She grabbed his hand and squeezed it tight. Angel opened his eyes and looked into hers.

"Buffy, I'm sorry I left you," he said gasping in pain. "I love you."

"I love you too, Angel. I wanted to tell you something, but I never thought I'd have to tell you like this." she said crying. "I remember when you became human, and I remember everything else about that day."

Angel took in a deep breath as a sharp pain shot through his body. He opened his mouth to ask how but Buffy stopped him. "It doesn't matter how I know. What matters is that I love you and that I always will." she leaned down to kiss him on his lips. He kissed her back weakly, then she felt his heart stop beating. She laid her head down on his chest and cried. She cried for him, and she cried for their lost love. She felt hands on her shoulders. She lifted her head and saw that it was Spike. He kneeled beside her and held her.

"He sacrificed himself for you," he said quietly. "He truly did love you."

* * * * *

Buffy stayed in her old bedroom the next day at her mom's house, crying and mourning. She hardly slept and when she did, she dreamed of her Angel. They were together in a peaceful meadow with the sun shining down on them. He kept telling him that he loved her and that she had to move on with her life.

"Buffy, you have to talk to Spike," he said softly, holding her hand as they walked along a shimmering river.

"Talk to him about what?" she asked him.

He turned to look at her. "About us, our past, and your future together."

"We don't have a future together, he is a vampire and sooner or later he will have to fulfill his vampiric needs, like hunting and killing people." she said sadly.

"Talk to him. You'll see," he said just before she awoke with a start. His words repeated in her mind and somehow she knew that would never see him again for a long time. She cried on her pillow until she had no tears left. She heard whispers downstairs and went to investigate. It was Willow talking with Buffy's mom, Joyce. They were talking in a hushed tone so they wouldn't disturb Buffy.

"You mean he's--" Joyce asked.

"Yeah," Willow said quietly. "Buffy was really upset about it. Well, you already know that, but she'll get over him eventually. Spike needs to talk to her so he can tell her--"

"I need to talk to him too," Buffy said, startling the two women.

"Oh, hi Buffy," Willow said, giving her friend a quick hug. "How are you?"

"I've been better, but I know what I have to do now. Angel told me," she replied, pouring herself a cup of coffee.

Willow gave her a confused look. *Angel told her?* she wondered silently.

~~ Chapter Nine ~~

Xander heard a knock on the door of his apartment. He was shocked when he saw it was her. "Cordy, what--"

"Look Xander, I just--nice apartment." she said stepping inside and looking around.

"Yeah, I've had it for about three years now. Buffy christened it by killing a demon right over there." he said pointing to where a couch now sat.

"Yuck, a demon was in here?" she said making a face. "Besides Anya, I mean."

"Anya's not a demon anymore, you know." Xander said.

"Yeah, thanks to Little Miss Likes-To-Fight." Cordy said, rolling her eyes.

"What is your problem, Cor?" he asked. "Why did you come here?"

"I just--wanted to say goodbye before I left," she said looking down at her feet. "I'm going back to LA with Gunn."

"You and Gunn are--"

"Oh no! God no, but he lives in LA and so do I so we're going to take Angel's car back." she said, bursting into tears as she said the former vampire's name.

Xander pulled her into a hug. "It's okay Cordelia," he rubbed her back to comfort her.

"No it's not! Buffy just let him die there, she didn't do anything to help him!" Cordy yelled.

"There's nothing she could have done," he said softly. "It wasn't her fault."

"I loved him...He was like a brother to me." she said in a raspy voice. She cleared her throat. "A two hundred and forty-seven-year old brother."

Cordelia pulled back to look at Xander. His eyes were soft and sincere. Suddenly she kissed him.

* * * * *

That evening Buffy came home. She had gone to find Spike but he wasn't at the mansion where he had lived for the past year. She closed the door to her apartment, conveniently in the same building as Xander's, and there was Spike, sitting on the couch watching television. He flipped off the TV and stood up to face her. "Hey Buff, where've you been?"

"Spike, where were you today? I went to your place but you weren't there." she explained as she hung her coat in the closet.

"I've been here all day, waiting for you to come home." he said. "I have to talk to you."

"Me too," she said walking over to him. "Last night, when we were attacked...I called Angel's name--"

"Yeah, I know...do you have to remind me?" he said, cutting her off. "Look, I can't hide it anymore. I love you!" he shouted. He softened his tone and continued. "I love you so much, and it hurts me when you say his name. And when I look into your eyes, I can see how much you love him. And it kills me."

"You didn't let me finish," she said while the tears in her eyes threatened to fall. "I called his name only because I saw him again...I was thinking of him and that day that he became human. It was the same type of demon we fought before and I sort of had déjà vu."

"But last night, you were probably crying over him because you still love him, right?" Spike asked.

"Yes I love him, I always will...but I'm not in love with him. You took his place a long time ago," she said softly. "The love you see in my eyes is for you. You're too busy comparing yourself to him that you don't realize that you are the one I want to be with."

"Yeah well he's a difficult guy to match." he mumbled.

"Well you did. In fact, I think I love you more than I love him. And besides, I have to follow in Dru's footsteps...do you think that that is any fun?" she asked.

"Dru who?" Spike asked. "I haven't thought about her for one second since I staked her after she tried to attack you. I fell in love with you the first time I saw you...even while she and I were together." He walked over to Buffy and kissed her. She put her hands on his chest as he wrapped his arms around her. Her pulse was racing; she could feel it beating in her chest as Spike held her against him. *Wait a minute,* she thought to herself. *That isn't just my heart. It's Spike's too!*

~~ Chapter Ten ~~

As they kissed hungrily for one another, Xander's hands moved to her waist. He gently pushed her away. "Cordy, what--?"

"I'm sorry Xander," she said stepping away from him and sitting on the couch. "I've just missed you so much...and seeing you again, well, it brought back a lot of memories...some of which I want to forget."

"I know, me too," he said. "Look, Cordy, I'm sorry...about everything."

"With Willow you mean?" she asked bitterly.

"Yes...no, you know what Cordelia? I'm glad I kissed Willow." he said staring into her eyes.

"Oh Xander, that's a girl's favorite pick-up line. You'll get far with that one." she said rolling her eyes.

He walked over to the couch and sat down beside her. "I'm glad I kissed Willow because it made me realize that I don't want her...I want you. I always have and--"

"Shut up Xander," she said, cutting him off. Her eyes were watering now. "You think you can just say that and make me feel better?"

"Come on Cordelia, that was, like five years ago." he said. "I was young and stupid--"

"Very stupid" she mumbled quietly.

"And kidnapped at the time. We didn't know what we were doing, we thought we did, but we were just scared. We both realized that it wasn't what either of us wanted. Please Cordy, you left me once and it took a long time for me to be Xander again...if you leave me again...I don't think I could survive it again." he stared into her eyes, tears blurring his vision.

Cordy was speechless. She didn't realize how much she had hurt him. Of course he had hurt her too, but she truly wanted to be with him. She wanted to feel his arms around her. She put her arms around his waist and as he held her, she knew that he would never hurt her again.

"I'm sorry, Xander."

* * * * *

Buffy pulled away from Spike. She was breathing heavily, trying to catch her breath and so was he. "Spike, you're...alive?"

"Yeah, and my head hurts like a bitch!" he said feeling the back of his head with his hand. His wound was small and had already started healing, even though it had bled a tremendous amount.

She laughed, "I can't believe it...how did it happen?"

"Well, my theory is, when I was nearly unconscious, you fed me your blood." he explained.

"But you've fed off of me tons of times, how come only now?" she asked. "Was there a checkpoint like: 'The one thousandth feeding gets a life back!'"

"But, you had Mohra's blood in your blood, therefore, it restored my life."

"So, what's your soul like?" she asked. "You seem the same when you were a vampire."

"I've had my soul ever since I realized that I loved you, which was about three years ago. I was pretty much the same when I was human...only being a vampire made me evil and murderous. When I got my soul, the hate inside of me just disappeared and I felt like a person again." he explained.

"Three years?" she asked. "But we only started seeing each other a year ago. And you didn't seem tortured like--"

"Angel was?" Spike finished. "Of course I felt bad, especially in the first few months, but I know that wasn't really me. I will always regret what I did as a vampire, but I feel slightly better knowing that some force of nature gave me my soul back so we could be together...and that it wasn't just a curse."

"Angel's curse was what kept us apart...it's why he left me in the first place." she said.

"You think he wanted to leave you? When Angel had his soul, he was Buffy-whipped. He would have done anything you asked him to...except stay here," he said. "Even when he was Angelus he obsessed over you. Now I can see why."

She smiled sadly. "I love you, Spike...or is it William now?"

"I'll stick with Spike for now. William the Bloody doesn't really suit me as a human, does it?" he said.

"Does anybody else know about your soul?" Buffy asked.

"No, they just thought I was a regular Scooby vampire, if there is such a thing." he replied smiling.

"Should we go tell them?" she said starting towards her door.

Spike took hold of her wrist and pulled her close. "Let's tell 'em in the morning." he said grinning slyly.

~~ Chapter Eleven ~~

Cordelia woke up and at first didn't remember where she was. She looked around and smiled. She was at Xander's. She had fallen asleep on the couch in his arms but he probably went to bed. She got up and stretched. A note was laying on the coffee table next to the couch. It read:

"Dear Cordy,
I've just gone to the store for some food. All that's left in the fridge is some orange juice so you can help yourself to that if you want. I'll be back in a jiffy. Love, Xander"

Cordelia smiled and went to the fridge. Before she opened the door she noticed a picture held by a small magnet. It was her and Xander at the beach. In the photo, she was trying to tan on her beach blanket and Xander was being, well, Xander, and was trying to kiss her on the cheek. Buffy had taken the picture right as Cordy was pushing Xander away, capturing the true essence of their relationship. She couldn't help but smile at the fact that Xander had kept the picture after all this time had gone by.

Just then she heard keys in the door and ran to help Xander with the groceries. She swung the door open and greeted him. "Hi Xand--Anya. What a surprise!" she said, putting on a fake smile.

"I came to talk to Xander. Is he here?" she asked barging into the apartment and looking around. "I want to un-breakup with him."

She stared at Cordelia until she became uncomfortable and had to answer. "Well, Xander and I are, um, sort of...back together." she said as Anya walked towards the living room.

She stopped in her tracks. "You what? But he's supposed to be lost without me and take me back when I come back for him and tell him it was a mistake like it was in that movie we watched." she said glumly.

Cordelia smiled gently. "Anya, life isn't what it's like in the movies...that's why they're movies. They're written to be sappy and romantic."

"Well, I guess it worked out for you right?" Anya said, her voice trembling. She placed the key to Xander's apartment in Cordelia's hand. "I guess you'll be needing this. Don't tell him I was here okay?" she said between tears.

She stood up and left Cordy sitting on the couch as she closed the door behind her. Poor Anya, she thought. *I'm lucky I got another chance.*

* * * * *

Everybody was gathered in the magic shop that afternoon aside from Cass who was out with her friends, and Oz who was at a practice session with the band. Anya wasn't there either, since she had the day off.

"I don't know what I'll tell Dennis." Cordelia said sighing. "He'll be heartbroken that I'll be moving out."

"Who's Dennis?" Giles asked.

"My roommate," Cordelia replied casually. When she saw Xander's face she added, "Oh don't worry Xander, it's not like that...Dennis is a ghost."

"Oh," he replied. "Why did you move in with him?"

"Well, I didn't know at first, but I can tell you the whole story in the car, and he can help us pack...so where's Buffy and why did she call us all here?" she asked impatiently. "We need to go back to LA and get my stuff...and I want to get there before dark."

"Hi everybody, I'm here. Sorry I'm late, but Spike wouldn't stop staring at himself in the mirror." Buffy said walking into the shop holding hands with Spike. Everybody gasped when they saw Spike standing in the light streaming through the windows.

"Spike, what are you doing out in the sunlight? I thought Angel smashed the Ring of Amara." Willow asked.

"Oh, this? I'm human now," he said casually, trying to hide a huge grin.

Nobody spoke for a few minutes. Finally, Gunn spoke up. "Were you infected with Mohra's blood too?"

"Sort of," Buffy answered. "He lost a lot of blood during the fight so I made him feed off of me, forgetting that I had Mohra's blood in mine."

"That's a good thing, right?" Cordelia asked.

"It's excellent!" Spike replied hugging Buffy. "Now we can be together whenever we want, day or night."

"Sorry to kill the mood," Gunn said, standing up. "But we'd better get going," "Or by the time we get to LA, it'll be dinner time for the vamps."

"You're leaving Cordy?" Buffy asked.

"No, I'm going to move in with Xander, but we need to get my stuff from my old apartment." she said smiling. "I know it's short notice, but we're ready for it. I can't leave him again."

"How will you get back?" Spike asked.

"Oh, we agreed that she should keep Angel's car since I have a motorcycle back home." Gunn answered.

"What about Wesley?" Giles asked. "Will he keep having visions?"

"We're not sure yet, but for the time being he's going back to England to work for the Watcher's Council." Cordelia said.

"Well tell him to stop by here first so we can say goodbye." Buffy said.

A few minutes later, Gunn, Cordelia, and Xander left for LA.

"So, Spike, you're human?" Giles asked.

"Yup, I've got a heartbeat and everything," he said. "It feels good to breathe again. Hey, I've got an idea...who wants pizza? It's my treat. Besides, I've never tried it before and I've heard it's the greatest thing since sliced bread."

"Well then you've gotta try pepperoni and mushroom." Buffy said.

"But, no garlic." Spike said. "I don't think I'm ready for that just yet."

Giles and Buffy just laughed.

~~ Epilogue ~~

It was a Friday evening and Buffy and Spike, or William as she now called him, were waiting for their guests to arrive. Xander and Cordelia entered the living room, led by the butler, and walked over to the happy couple sitting on the couch.

"Wow, Buffy!" exclaimed Cordelia. "I still can't believe you're going to be a mother." Spike and Buffy had gotten married two years after he became human and they moved into the mansion. Now, three and a half years after their wedding, she was pregnant.

"Yeah, me neither." she sighed happily. "Only eight months to go!"

"Cordy, that's quite the rock. Isn't your wrist sore from lugging it around?" Spike joked.

She laughed lightly as she looked at her engagement ring. "I'm the luckiest girl alive to be marrying Xander." She smiled sweetly at her fiancé and he smiled back.

"Who are all these people?" Buffy asked her husband, scanning the crowd.

"I don't really know," he replied. "I only invited, like, five of these people...but I think some of them work on the same floor that I do." he looked around. "Oh, there's Dan, he owes me ten bucks. Excuse me for a moment." he said, stepping away from them. Spike had become a professional writer and had sold many bestseller books...about vampires of course. Most of the novels were based on his unlife and included Drusilla, Angelus, Darla, and of course, Buffy and the 'Scoobies'. Some of the details and all of the names were changed but the novels continued the saga that was their lives, each one a sequel to the last...that is why they sold so well.

Buffy looked over at Spike as he talked with the man and laughed. She turned back to Xander and Cordy. "William seems so happy to be human...we are both thankful for this...but now he will age and die, and sometimes I wonder if he was happier as a vampire."

"Never," she heard a voice behind her and she spun around. Spike was looking into her eyes and smiling. "If it hadn't happened, we probably wouldn't be married and we for sure wouldn't have any children of our own."

Cordelia gave Xander a look and he nodded. "Well, excuse us, but we're going to get something to drink." she said smiling. "Uh, which way to the kitchen?" Xander asked. Spike pointed him in the proper direction. "See you two lovebirds later." he added, winking and grinning at the couple.

"I wish Willow and Oz could be here," Buffy said, looking down and placing her hands on her stomach. Oz's band had gone on a tour across Canada and Willow had gone with him.

"They'll only be gone for another month." Spike said, trying his best to console his wife. He cupped her chin and brought her face up to look into her eyes. "I know you miss them, but you still have Xander, Cordy, and Cass here."

"But most importantly, I still have you." she whispered.

"And you will always have me. That goes without saying." he said softly. He gave her a quick kiss as more people came over to talk to them.

After the party was over and the caterers were finished clearing the tables. Buffy, Spike, Xander and Cordy sat on the couches in the living room.

"The food was great, what company did you hire?" Cordelia asked. "We should use them for our wedding."

"Uh-oh," Spike whispered to Xander. "They're talking about the wedding plans. Trust me, you don't want to get in the way of the wedding planning unless she asks your opinion. Maybe we should go have a game of pool." he suggested.

Xander looked at his watch, smiling. "Well, we should be going. It's almost twelve thirty."

After the couple left, Buffy and Spike went upstairs to their room. As Buffy was removing her earrings and necklace she asked Spike a question. "Now that you've finished the novel of when Angel lost his soul, what's next?"

"I think I'll take a break for a couple weeks...maybe we can go on vacation somewhere." he brandished two plane tickets and waved them in front of her. "England maybe?"

Buffy looked at Spike with a huge grin on her face. "Really?" she asked.

"Yeah, I figured we could stop by and visit 'ol' Ripper. And you'd better say yes because he's already expecting us." he said laughing.

"Oh, William, I love you." she said between kisses. She let go of him and walked into the closet. Spike sat down on the bed and removed his shirt and tie. A few minutes later Buffy came out in a sexy silk nightgown.

Spike's eyes inspected her slim body. "Oh, ducks, you look ravishing in that. And it's red, my favorite colour!" he said standing up. She walked over to him and put her hands on his bare chest. She felt his heartbeat under her right hand.

"You know, it's been over five years and I still can't believe you're human. I don't think I ever will. It's like a dream that I never want to wake up from."

"If it was a dream, would Angel still be alive?" he asked before he could stop himself.

She just smiled. "No, Spike," she said, using his old nickname. "You are my angel." she said before she kissed him softly.

"When you call me Spike, I feel young again." he said picking her up and carrying her over to their bed. He laid her down and kissed her gently.

"Spike, you are young." Buffy said smiling. "So why don't you prove it to me?"

"Yes ma'am," he said, caressing her softly as he followed through with his order.

The End