Part Two

"Exactly how many boxes of Count Chocula did you have to eat to get your driver's license?" Kim yelled as the eighteen wheeler blasted it's air horn.

"None, I got it in the Captain Crunch box." Tamera shot back with a grin. "Okay navigator where we going?"

Rupert shuffled the papers on his lap. "Umm, we just left... ummm."

Kim rattled her map in the back seat. "We just did a half gainer off of the Pennsylvania Turnpike on to Southbound I-476, looks like we got about twenty miles to I-95. If that's where old Giovanni wants us to hop off it should take us about ten minutes."

"Ummm, yes that is our next turn." Rupert held up the official directions. "From that point we continue on to an entire alphabet soup of directions." A worried frown crossed his face. "Twenty miles in ten minutes?"

Harvey blew past them honking his horn.

"Make that eight minutes!" Tamara yelled while goosing the accelerator. She eased around the semi. "Hang on children! We're coming through."

Rupert checked his seat belt and gave Tamara a worried glance. He was beginning to believe that instead of being concerned about the well-being of these two women he should start worrying about his own safety. They both seemed very intelligent, but he could not comprehend why they had entered this contest. It was more than the money, it had to be. This morning he had overheard the two of them while they packed the van. Kim's husband was not at all happy that she had went on this adventure and Tamara had spent her last penny to enter. In matter of fact if she lost she would be... what was that Kim said? "You can live in my basement real cheap! What the hell, when I get back I'll be livin' down there too."

He startled as a map landed on his lap.

Kim bent around the seat. "Okay Rup, here's a visual on the alphabet soup."

Tamara laughed. "Hey that rhymes! You're a poet and don't know it."

"Give me the time if you want a rhyme."

"That was quick! You make me sick." Tamera looked over at Rupert. "You're turn!"

"I believe it's going downhill." Rupert pointed forward. "Would you watch the road please?" He tapped on the map. "Now what were you saying?"

"Okay Mr. Party Pooper, lookie, lookie. Looks like we're going to be on I-95 all the way to Florida. It's just that to get around the big cities we have'ta hit all these 2-95 and 4-95 bypasses. Once we get into Virginia it'll be pedal to the metal, good buddy all the way to Jacksonville."

"Pedal to the metal? Gooooood Buddy?" Tamera shook her head. "Kimberly you just carbon dated yourself with that."

"Yeah, I'm older than dirt." She quipped back, then lowered her voice to a stage whisper. "Don't spread it around Rupert, but I went to school with Moses."

Tamera nodded. "But he was two grades above 'ya. Hey what's the next exit?"

Kim pulled the map off of Rupert's lap. "Follow your nose 'till you get to 95 and then whip it Southbound and down."

"Why don't you be the 'navigator'?" Rupert said sharply as he bailed up everything and handed it to her. "And you might want to put your seatbelt back on. The traffic is getting heavy."

"If I didn't know better, I'd say Rupert ain't having a good time." Tamara said half in jest. She looked in the rear view as Kim strapped back in and theatrically shrugged her shoulders.

"I'm enjoying myself." Rupert let the comment lay for a moment then added. "It's just that it's all starting to sink in. I came to Pennsylvania assuming that I could meet with Mr. Giovanni, reclaim my lost item and be on my way."

Tamera nodded. "But instead, thanks to Mr. 'You Gotta Earn It', you get railroaded into taking a road trip." She arched an eyebrow and grinned wickedly. "Hey! Look on the bright side. You get to ride with two beautiful and intelligent.."

"Witty." Kim interjected.

"... And witty and impressive and.."

"Stimulating."

"... Yeah, stimulating and competent and.."

"Awe inspiring."

"... Awe inspiring and refreshing and..."

"Full of shit."

"...And full of..." Tamera turned in her seat. "Hey, speak for yourself."

"Sorry, but it was getting pretty deep." Kim pointed forward. "Drive Kemosaube! Let's rock and roll. There's gold in them thar hills. Into the valley of death! Damn the torpedoes and full speed ahead! It ain't over 'till it's over!"

Rupert leaned over to Tamara and whispered. "Interesting collection of mixed metaphors."

"Her mind wanders, she was a child of the 70's you know. Don't worry, you'll get used to it. You know her best friend back in Ohio is a shrink? Talk about lucking out!"

"And you are a child of the... 80's?"

"How'd you know?"

"The... attire."

"Yep! You know if you're gonna ride with us you're going to have to change your style." She reached over and flicked her finger on his suitjacket. "I mean, look at you. Suit, tie - you're dressed like you're going to a funeral. Come-on let your hair down a little, we're on the road, everything is running like clockwork and you're acting like something going to jump out of the glove compartment and bite you."

"Thank you... I hadn't thought of that." Rupert reached over and slowly opened the glove box. "Brace yourself."

Tamera laughed at what she assumed was a joke and pressed the van a little faster.

******

"This is it! To the RIGHT! GET OVER!" Nigel threw the direction packet to the floorboard and pounded his fists on the dash. "YOU STUPID WANKER!! THAT WAS OUR TURN OFF!! NOW WE'RE GOING NORTH!!!"

"KEEP YOUR HAIR ON!!!" Patrick yelled, as the exit onto Southbound I-95 flew by two lanes over.

"Ten damn signs in the last ten damn miles, saying that the damn turn was... and you absobloodylutely ignore..." Philip began to mutter in the back seat.

Patrick halfway checked his rear view and slid over a lane. "I've got it under control!"

Nigel shot him an exasperated look as the pickup truck behind them laid on its horn. "Did you see that man you just cut off? Christ!" He turned around and looked at the shaved gorilla behind them. "He's so on our arse that he's halfway into the bloody boot, and I don't think he's shouting sweet nothings at us."

"No problem!" Pat tightened his grip on the wheel and swerved over into the far right lane.

"No problem?" Philip smacked the back of Patrick's head as the oversized tires of the pickup whined beside them. "This is America! They shoot people on the motorways for not using a signal!"

"I'll slow down and let him pass."

HOOOOOOOOONNNK!!

"AND NOW WE HAVE A JUGGERNAUT UP OUR ARSE!" Philip screamed and then took a second wide-eyed look at the semi's front grill. He leaned over the seat and hissed in Patrick's ear" At least there's a cross made out of lights on the front of it. That way they can just heave all the wreckage into a pit and not bother with a memorial stone."

Patrick pulled off the highway and slammed on his brakes. Jabbing his finger into Philips face he snapped back. "Thank you for the insight. If YOU would have rented us a REAL vehicle instead of this sodding toy car we would have the power to keep up with the traffic."

Philip took a slap at the finger. "If YOU would have cocked up their van the way YOU were suppose to we would have had Giles out of the picture by now." He pointed at the trip odometer. "We've followed them for 134 miles and they haven't even wavered. We have to keep HIM from getting that cross...."

"Shut your gobs." Nigel said quietly. but Phil kept on talking.

"... if he gets his bastard hands on it, it's all over. He won't sell it to us, you know that, the Yanks would... Yanks would do anything for a dollar.. but..."

"Shut the 'ell up." Nigel said again through clenched teeth as a tap on the driver's window caught Philip and Patrick's attention.

Patrick rolled down his window an saw his wide eyed reflection in the mirrored sunglasses of a Pennsylvania State Trooper.

"Sir, do you realize you have made four improper lane changes in the past four miles?"

Patrick made a odd noise, like that of a large rodent facing a very large cat. "Erk.."

"And Sir, do you also realize we have received two cellular phone calls to 911 regarding your reckless operation?"

"Erk.."

Nigel leaned over. "Officer, my friend here was overwhelmed by the traffic. You see, we are from England, taking a holiday and..."

"License and rental car agreement, please."

"Oh yes, 'the filth', same the world over." Nigel muttered with a smile.

"What was that, Sir?" The trooper ask without moving any part of his face.

Nigel's smile became even more pronounced. "Oh, 'the filth' that's our slang for 'paperwork'."

"In England?"

Philip slid back into the corner of the back seat and grimaced as Patrick took up the game. Catching sight of the Trooper's namebadge -Gorman he nodded and smiled. "Yes Officer Gormless we have very colorful turns of the word. I'm sure a fine naff wanker like you would enjoy our colloquialisms. You should come visit someday."

"Sir, I just got back from London. Visited my Aunt and Uncle and my cousin, who by the way is on the police force. Spent some time at his precinct station with his fellow officers. When we finished talking shop we discussed... slang."

"Erk!"

"License, rental car agreement, proof of insurance, proof of financial responsibility, passport and..." For the first time the Trooper's face showed an expression. Unfortunately for the three the expression was a very twisted smile. "...and your mother's birth certificate."

Nigel laid his head on the dashboard and whimpered.

******

"Uh-oh." Tamera bit her lip and stared at the rising temperature gauge. "Hey Kim! How far to the next exit?"

"Why?"

"Just answer me." Came the singing reply.

Rupert glanced over at the gauge. "Oh Jesus! We're overheating!"

Kim came forward. "Ah... we just passed Stafford, Virginia... wait a minute. That billboard says three miles to exit 133 and Terry's Truck Plaza. Can we make it?"

"Gonna try."

"We should pull over." Rupert warned.

Kim went back to her seat and sat down. "Don't get your shorts in a bunch. It's not in the red yet."

Everyone held their breath for the three miles as the needle crept hotter. By the time they pulled into the truck stop the van was beginning to hiss like a snake. Tamara pulled toward the cavernous doors of the semi-tractor service bay. "Wonder if they work on vans?"

"It's after six, so the big question is gonna be is Earl-Bob the mechanic even here?" Kim commented as she jumped out.

"What do you think is wrong?" Rupert asked as Tam shut off the engine.

"You tell me, remember you're the guy."

"Ah... it overheated?"

Tamara rolled her eyes. "You're good." She gave a nod toward the service area. "Looks like Kim has someone cornered. Oooo, she's waving her hands around.... now she's putting them on her hips.... now she's looking pitiful.... YES!" Tamera punched a fist into the air as the mechanic came out nodding his head and making a motion for Tamara to pop the hood.

Tamara rolled down her window as Tom the mechanic came to the van.

"We're closed, I'm just doing the books. But... if it's just a hose or something...." He peered into the engine compartment. "Start her up." He stared at the motor for few seconds. "Shut her off."

"Well?" Rupert asked out his window.

"You overheated." Tom said while scratching himself. "Leave it open to cool off and I'll take a look at it."

Tamara got out and stretched. "We're going to go get something to eat." She said as she headed for the truck stop restaurant.

Rupert and Kim both nodded and joined her.

"Sorry to hear about your cousin!" Tom called after them.

"What did you tell him?" Tamara whispered to Kim who had turned to sadly acknowledge the comment.

"That we're on our way to out cousin Ted's funeral in Tampa. He died day before yesterday in a tragic accident involving an alligator, roller blades and a Big Mac."

"You're twisted, I like that in a person."

"Thank you... think they got any decent fried chicken here?"

Rupert rolled his eyes and followed them into the restaurant.

******

"Paper beats rocks, okay Rupert you get to pay." Tamara handed him the bill. "But Kim and I are leaving the tip."

"I can get that also." Giles countered.

"Don't argue with me." Tamara came back

"Wouldn't think of it." He sighed as he picked up the check. "I will pay for supper from now on, Kim can get breakfast and you can get lunch." He slid out of the booth. "That way we won't have to 'paper, scissors, stone' for the honor."

Tamara made a fist and pointed at it. "Rock."

"Whatever."

Kim finished off her fifth cup of coffee and tossed two dollars and twenty-one cents on the table. "Sure... there's my half of fifteen percent. I'm gonna hit the ladies room and swing into the gift shop. I just love junk."

"I'm right behind you Ms Calculator." Tamara laughed as she added her money to the tip pile.

Rupert pulled out his wallet and paused to glance at his watch. "It's twenty 'till eight. If we do use this downtime as our break we have six hours until we should start again. I'll go over to the service center and check on the van... make sure it's accessible... we should take advantage of this to nap a bit." He raised his eyes for a response but the two women had left. With a sigh he got up and went to the register.

"Hey pal!"

Giles turned to see Tom at the door motioning for him to come outside. He nodded to the cashier, picked up his change and joined the mechanic on the sidewalk.

"I got good news and bad news, buddy." He began before Rupert could say a word. "Good news is I got it fixed and it's only gonna set you back forty-four dollars. Bad news is this.." Tom held out the water hose and pointed at a long slit.

"It's been cut." Rupert said incredulously. "Who would do that?"

"How should I know?" Tom scratched his rear end and shrugged. "But whoever did it either knew what they were doing or didn't know squat. See here... they didn't get all the way through but it weakened it so after a while the coolant just started pissin' out. That made you overheat real slow like." He began to walk back through the lot with Rupert at his side. "I wanted to tell you 'bout it so it didn't worry the ladies."

"Thank you, I.. I.. defiantly don't want to 'worry' them."

Tom waved his hand toward the van and then back toward the service office. "You're good to go... now let's settle up so I can get out of here. " He smiled as Rupert handed him a fifty and muttered something about keeping the change. "Thanks buddy. By the way why was your cousin tormentin' that gator like that?"

"Ahhh..." Rupert blinked, shrugged and shook his head. "Circus act. We are a... circus family.. my cousins and I. We are known for our...interesting ah, performances."

Tom raised an eyebrow and backed away. "Uh-huh... 'yall have a safe trip. Bye now."

"Oh God!" Rupert thought as he went over to the van and leaned against it. "Cut! They cut the hose. Oh God... Kim and Tamara! They are in danger and.... Oh God here they come. I have to think of something... "

"We ready to rumble?" Tamera said while doing a little dance.

"It's repaired."

"Look what I got you!" She said tossing Rupert a bag. "A gen-U-wine Stone Cold Steve Austin T-shirt!" Tamara halfway leered still doing her dance. "Try it on, right now, loose the jacket, rip off the tie, whip off the button-down off and try it on."

"Yeah, take it off and swing it around over your head a few times." Kim piped in with a grin as she joined in with Tam's improvised line dance. "If you do I'll show you what I got the kids - gen-U-wine 'my mom went to Virginia and all I got was this lousy T-shirt' shirts."

"Oh God... you have children." Rupert moaned.

Tamara and Kim stopped mid-shuffle and looked very confused. "Huh?"

"N-n-n-nothing." Rupert stuttered as he tried to grin. "I just forgot that you have.. that you are married... that we really don't know each other and." He began to fiddle with his collar, glasses and tie. "So to keep appearances, I'm going to rent my own car and follow you. And I'll rent my own room, in a separate hotel and we will eat separately."

"I was just kidding about wanting you to swing the shirt around." Kim said taken aback by Rupert's overt nervousness. "Jeeze, I'm not going to.."

"You can't rent a car! We have to travel together or we're disqualified." Tam butted in.

"It would be more proper.."

"Proper my ass! Proper this!" Tamara yelled with a hand sign. "Listen up we've all dropped three grand apiece to enter this and you're not going to screw it up because all of a sudden you decide to get PROPER!" She began to stomp in a circle. "Christ! We're all adults here... lighten up! Does anal-retentive have a hyphen? PROPER?!"

Rupert's head began to hurt as he started to pace back and forth beside the van. "Allright... ALLRIGHT!" He stopped and pointed at the two. "Would you just promise me something? It's very important to me that..."

Kim began to cross her heart. "Sure, no more cracks about you stripping in front of..."

"No, no, no, stripping in front of you is not the problem." His face froze for a second as he realized what he had just said. "I mean.. oh, never mind." He began to pace again. "I want both of you to promise me that you will never invite anyone into our vehicle or into our hotel rooms. Promise?"

"Uh-huh." Kim and Tam answered in unison.

"Never... under any circumstances. Promise?"

"Uh-huh."

"And you must also swear that you will never go with a stranger, no matter what they say. Promise?"

"Uh-huh?"

"Even if they say I have sent them for you. Promise?"

"Uh-huh?"

He quit pacing and stared at them. "And... and may I ask you both a personal question?"

"Uh-huh?"

"Are.. are either of you very... ummm, religious?"

Kim blinked.

Tamara blinked.

Rupert stood there looking like a possum in the headlights. "Or religious at all?"

"Combo platter of Lutheran and Catholic. Still on the fence with that whole Reformation thing." Kim deadpanned.

"Oh that's good!" Rupert nodded his head at looked at Tamara. "And you?"

Still P.O.ed over his attempt to bail on them, Tamara's voice had an edge to it as she asked. "What's going on?"

"Please, just answer the question."

Tam went from 'edgy' to 'dripping with sarcasm. "Yeah, I guess you could say so... depends on whether or not I can find a black goat."

Rupert rubbed his chin and began to pace again. "Very good. Just be careful with the black arts. I'm sure you realize sometimes sorcery is very unpredictable."

"It... was... a... joke." Tamara slowly said through gritted teeth.

"Oh, my mistake." Rupert said a calmly as possible. He stopped pacing and pointed toward them. "Then the two of you wouldn't mind... I see you both wear jewelry... so, perhaps I could ask you both to wear a cross." Rupert plastered a thin hopeful smile on his face and nodded. "It doesn't have to be a large one."

"Okay... what the hell is this all about?" Tamara took two steps toward him but was stopped by Kim's hand on her shoulder.

"Tamara, may I speak with you for a moment? In private." Kim muttered with a tight lipped smile.

"NO!" She brushed the hand off her and pointed a finger at Rupert. What's going on?"

Rupert took off his glasses and rubbed his face as he told them the truth. "The van was sabotaged. Someone cut the water hose."

"Sabotaged? By whooo?" Kim asked crossing her arms.

Rupert considered his options: lie out his teeth or continue with the truth. Tamara was shaking like she was going to explode and Kim had a 'spill your guts or I'll hang your butt on a meat hook' expression that told him that, thanks to the children, she was a pro at interrogation. "It's a long story." He hedged.

"They always are." Kim snotted as Tamara began to shake her finger at him and hiss.

With a heavy sigh Rupert sat down on a cement parking stop and put his head into his hands. "Blast it all to..." He went silent for a few moments then raised his head and stared at the descending sun. "Hour until sunset." He thought as he motioned to the cement blocks on each side of him. "Sit down, please and I will tell you. The Slayer's cross is an ancient artifact...."

******

As he finished the woman exchanged glances. Kim leaned over and placed her hand on Rupert's arm and gave it a gentle squeeze. "Marvin the vampire? Now I understand." Her eyes rolled and she gave him a look that could have sterilized a frog. "I'll give you an 'A' for original thesis, and a 'F' for are you out of your fuckin' mind?!!"

Rupert flinched, startled at the barked profanity. "Kim! That language is not necessary!"

"Oh... comrade! I'm just getting warmed up! Got twenty-five years of pressroom profanity to draw from here." She stood and rubbed her hands together. "So, you want it alphabetical or as it comes blowing in the wind?!"

"Lay off him." Tamara muttered.

"Say WHAT?" Kim began to wave her arms around. "Don't tell me you believe this cat-shit."

"Calm down Kimberly... I know it's hard to believe..." Rupert got up and made a patting motion.

"HARD TO.."

"Kimmmmmmieee." Tam hissed as she began to lead her friend away. "He's telling the truth. "Let's say we go on over to that Wal-Mart across the road and pick up a couple of crosses." She turned her back to Giles and faced Kim mouthing the words. "Trust me."

"We should stick together." Rupert said.

Kim's eyes darted between Tam and Rupert finally centering on Giles. "You stay here and check your meds, we'll be right back."

"Yeah.. ah, Rupert how about you gas up the van and pull it on across the road. We'll meet you inside." Tam said as she continued dragging Kim away.

"You see that Heartland Express eighteen wheeler over there? Well they gotta terminal in Columbus and sooner or later that rig will end up in Ohio. And let me tell 'ya what... I'm about two seconds from going over there, rousting the driver and..."

Tamara interrupted Kim's rant with an animal noise. "Arrrgh!"

After a few seconds of teeth gritting Kim mumbled. "Translate that."

"I know what's going on, Giovanni sent him to mess with us."

"Paranoid much?"

"It's not paranoia... he's P.O.ed that I entered." Tamara bit her lip. "I should have told you."

"Tell me what."

"Giovanni's my uncle."

"Your what?" Kim stopped in the road and put her hands on her hips.

Tamara made a motion for Kim to hurry up and finish crossing the road. "You're gonna get hit... come ON!"

"As long as it's by an West bound tractor-trailer rig I don't give a flying..." Now it was Kim's turn to make an animal noise as she crossed the ditch. "Er-r-r-arph! Your turn... let's hear it."

"Giovanni has more money than he knows what to do with and he thinks that gives him a right to tell the whole 'fam damily' when to shit and when to get off the pot." Tamara stopped and flipped the bird in the general direction of Pennsylvania. "But I won't kiss his ass, and because of it he's spent the last five years making my life livin' hell." She turned around and pointed across the road. "That line of crap he gave us? Well girlfriend, I've heard it before. Back when I was a kid Uncle G. used to tell us ghost and vampire stories and one of them was about how he tried to hire a Slayer to chase some vampires out of his hotel." She raised an index finger and twirled it around. "And yadda, yadda, yadda... this Watcher wouldn't hire this chick out and yadda, yadda, yadda all my other cousins acted like they believed him, but I told him he was full of shit."

"Direct quote?" Kim asked.

"Yup."

"I'm shocked..." Kim deadpanned. "So you think this Rupert is just messing with our minds?"

Tamara twisted her face into a sneer and nodded. "Oh yeah! So let's just go along with their game. Now let's go buy some crosses... 'cause the - 'ooooooo' - vampires are after us." She held her hand into the air. "Let's play!"

"Do we have to play nice?"

"Nope!"

"Think they have any of that garlic flavored Pam?" Kim said as they high-fived.

"Maybe.. and how about we pick up some bamboo skewers?"

"Good idea! Hey how about a bow and arrow? We can be Rambo Women from Hell!" Kim giggled and assumed a bodybuilder pose.

"You're scaring me." Tam giggled back as the two made their way past a U-Haul truck parked in the back of the Wal-Mart lot.

"That's them.... and 'hotdamnsam' he's not with them." Marvin whispered, peering out through the rough hole on the shaded side of the truck box. "Yes... yes... yes, go shopping ladies."

"So we don't need these guys?" Thomas said nodding his head toward the three new vampires in the corner.

"We need them more than I need you." Marvin hissed as he replaced the patch of duct tape over the hole. "Are you sure they will recognize these three?"

"Yeah, they were sitting right in front of them at the meeting last night. I saw them heading to their room after I got away from the Watcher." Thomas picked at his teeth. "I ain't gonna eat again for a month.

"You're just lucky I arrived." Marvin picked up what had been Treasure Hunt group nine's direction packet. "Fat lot of good this would have done for us with you trapped in the hotel until sunset." He shuffled the papers looking at the directions for the first leg. "How far is Daytona Beach from here?" He asked the driver, a skinny runt of a demon who was sitting in the corner reading the Weekly World News.

"Did you know NASA has a secret base where they do experiments on aliens?"

"How far to Daytona?" Marvin asked again.

"I always thought it was the other way around, that the aliens were the ones doing the experiments."

"How FAR?"

"I knew some guy in Montana that showed me the scar he got when they put this four inch implant in his..."

Marvin slapped the paper out of Earl's hands. "HOW FAR?!"

"Uh... about 770 miles." Earl picked his paper back up. "Should be about twelve, thirteen hours, if it was a normal person driving. But that red headed chickie, zoooooommmmms." He swept his hand back and forth. "Zoom, zoom, zoom... I like that in a woman."

"She's yours." Marvin said wickedly. "Sun will be down in about ten minutes and then we'll go get them."

"Our little bargaining chips." Thomas added as he went over to what had been group nine. "Now, listen up.. all you have to do is get them out here so we can....."

******

Kim picked up a package of tent stakes. "Will these do?"

Tamara shook her head. "Naaa, those are plastic, they have to be wood." She picked up a package of trail mix. "How's our munchie stash?"

"You can never have too many munchies, remind me to grab some cheap pop on the way out."

"Yeah it's on sale!" A stranger piped in.

Tamara and Kim turned to the sound of the man's voice. "Ah, you're Kevin... right?" Tam said recognizing him from the meeting.

Kevin grinned. "Yeah, small world. What'cha guys doing stopped here?"

"Ah... we had van trouble." Kim frowned. "So what are you guys doing here? We figured we were in last place now."

"Guess not." Kevin's grin became wider. "Hey! Come on out to the parking lot. Your teammate's out there and he said he needs to see you guys right away."

"But I came on in because they are not suppose to go with strangers." Rupert said as he approached. "But you're not a stranger... ah, we met last night. Kevin, isn't it?" He held his hand out to shake.

"Yeah.. Kevin Wilsonnnnn.. yeeeechhh! Ow! Ow! Ow! OW! DAMN!" Kevin's game face flashed into view as he held up his hand showing the cross shaped burn in the palm. The vampire spit, hissed, cursed and came for Rupert.

"RUN!" He yelled to Kim and Tamara as he pulled his stake out of his jacket.

"Holy..." Kim said.

"...Shit!" Tamara added, finishing the comment as Rupert staked the creature.

Rupert put the stake back into his jacket and turned back around. His face went dark as he saw Tamara and Kim standing frozen in the same spot they had been. "When I tell you to run... I bloody well mean RUN! Do you UNDERSTAND?!"

Mouth agape, Kim just nodded.

"Like... now?" Tamara whimpered as she raised her finger and pointed down the aisle past Rupert. There stood Joey and Don the other two members of group nine. The vampires sniffed the air taking in the dust of their fellow teammate and instinctively they knew what had happened. With low growls accompanied by snaps of the fangs they hesitantly approached. Rupert's fingers again wound around his stake. "When they attack I want you to run to the front of the store." He whispered to his companions without taking his eyes off of Don and Joey.

The three humans braced themselves for the confrontation as the vamps crept down the aisle. Suddenly four more figures appeared.

"Camping supplies are in this aisle. The Coleman lanterns are right here and the tarps on the shelf above them." The Wal-Mart associate pointed out the items to the other shoppers and turned to the five in the aisle. "Can I help you with anything?" Tamara and Kim watched in shock as the vampire's faces returned to normal before they turned to the floor clerk.

"No thanks... we're just looking." Joey muttered as he swept by her with Don in tow.

"And what about you folks? Anything I can..." She stopped mid-sentence upon seeing the stake in Rupert's hand.

Tamara came to her senses as Rupert began to fluster. "Ah... uh... no... I don't think..." Grabbing the stake out of his hand she approached the sales associate. "Do you have any of these?"

She blinked. "What is it?"

Tamara grinned weakly. "A tent stake?"

"Oh! Well Ma'am we have tent stakes right here, but they're plastic." She pointed to the display and then cocked her head upon seeing the pile of dust on the floor. "Now what in tarnation is that?"

"Vampire went poof." Kim muttered.

"Pardon?" The woman said with a second blink.

Rupert stepped between Kim and the associate. "Ah.. she said. aaahh...it's our bent roof."

"Yeah, the roof got all bent on our tent and that's why we need more of these." Tamara waved the stake around a bit. "But since you ain't got any of them I guess we'll be going."

"Yes, we'll be going now." He turned and began to steer Kim away. "Yes, going. Come along cousin."

With Kim between them they made their way to the front of the store and got in the checkout line. Tam picked the crosses out of the cart and handed Kim hers. Rupert looked around scanning the crowd for anything out of the ordinary.

"Don't need a sack, I'm wearing it now." Kim muttered to the clerk. "She glanced at the display behind the register. "And a carton of Winstons and lighter. Still don't need a sack, I'll smoke 'em on the way out."

"I thought you quit." Tam hissed.

Quittin's' easy... done it about twenty times." Kim stuffed the carton into her purse. "I gotta make a phone call."

"Who 'ya calling?" Tamara asked her departing friend. Kim just waved her hand in answer and went to the pay phones.

******

Christy adjusted her glasses and reread her report on the computer monitor. "Okay, maybe I should scratch 'crazier than a bedbug' and instead go with 'your client shows genuine psychotic behavior'."

"MOM! PHONE! IT'S KIMMIE!"

Harrison picked up the phone and waited until her daughter hung up.

"Hey Darlin'! What's up?"

"Hey Dearie! It's Kim.... How you doin'?" The too cheery voice belayed nervous and confused tendencies. (Being a trained professional Christy caught it right away, so she immediately went into "shrink" mode.) "Hon, Is there a problem?"

"I'm not sure... ah, well maybe." Kim hedged.

"Now, Kimmie remember you must focus. There is either a problem or their isn't."

(Through the phone the sound of a voice over a loudspeaker "Clean up in sporting goods." followed by Kim's nervous "Oh... hell.")

"Darlin'? Where are you?"

Kim's voice got a little high. "Okay Dearie here's the deal. Am I nuts? Be honest... I have to know."

"No Kimmie, you're not nuts." Christy sighed. "Except for your fixation on wasting your talent writing that fanfic shit..."

"Then I shouldn't be hallucinating?" Kim interrupted, then added "Hang on...."

Christy caught the sound of an English accent through the phone "Who are you talking to?" followed by Kim's "A friend back in Ohio."

Christy hit "save" and got up from her computer as bits and pieces of the separate conversation came over the line.

"We have to be covert."
"Your calling your psychiatrist friend?"
"Hang on, I gotta get this figured out."
"What's to figure?"
"Earth to Tam, newsflash, this is weird!"

Kim came back on. "Okay I'm back."

"Who was that?" Christy asked.

"Ah... ah..."

"Spill it, Kimmie."

"Promise you won't laugh?"

"Have I ever?"

"Yessssss." Kim hissed into the phone.

Christy assumed her best counseling voice. "Darlin' if this is important enough for you to call me about then I promise I'll listen. Remember, that's what I do for a living."

"Right... yeah." Kim answered. "Okay here's the whole nine yards. We had to get someone else to be the third warm body in our group. And we met this English guy in the bar and..."

"A stranger? Your picked up a stranger in a bar! Are you nuts!!" Christy yelled into the phone.

"That's what I'm trying to find out!" Kim shot back. "Well the long and short of it is, tonight he just told us that he's getting chased by vampires..."

Christy tapped her phone on the desk. "We must have a bad connection. I though I just heard you say...."

"You heard me right. You see we had some van trouble and found out that someone had messed with it. And this Rupert got all glum and told us that Marvin the vampire was after him. I went off the deep end until Tam told me that it was just her rich Uncle messing with us."

"Giovanni is your sodding Uncle!" Christy blinked as Rupert's voice again shot through and Kim again left the line. "Yeah Tam... fill him in will you."

"Okay I'm back... where was I?"

"Ah... messing with us?"

Kim made a funny noise. "Yeah... okay Tam tells me it's just Giovanni so we come over here to Wal-Mart to pick up some crosses and bamboo skewers."

"Crosses and bam.."

"Yeah! You gonna listen or not?" Kim yelled then took the shocked silence on the other end for an affirmative. "So we came in here and this Kevin guy attacked us right between the tent stakes and the belly packs. His face looked like 6 miles of bad road and he had these fangs and he wanted us to go with him to see Rupert."

"Darlin'... Breath in through the nose and out through the mouth." Christy said in a quiet counselor voice as she heard her friend approach hyperventilation.

"I am breathing! But that guy that came after us wasn't - isn't - didn't- oh hellifIknow!! Makes no difference because now he's a pile of dust right there in the middle of sporting goods 'cause Rupert showed up and put a stake through his heart and he just 'poofed'. Hang on!"

Again Kim held the mouthpiece away and had a separate conversation.

"Hurry up!"
"Yeah, yeah... I know. I'm comin', damnit."
"Kimberly, this is not wise."
"Chill out Rupert, Chris is a pal."
(Van keys jingling)
"Come on! We have to get out of here and get to the van before they booger it up again."

"Kimmie?"

Kim came back on the line. "I'll call again tomorrow night. I have to go. Just do me a favor and look in your books. If two people see the same thing does that mean it's a mass hallucination or could it really have happened? Bye!"

Click - buzzzz.

Christy looked blankly at the phone and went to get her reference books.

******

"You should NOT have done that." Rupert snapped.

"I'm just having a reality crisis... déjà vu all over again. Have I slipped back to 1974? 'Cause this reminds me of the night after the day after that Senior class party where Christy and I... never mind." Kim mumbled.

"There are bellbottoms on the rack over there." Tamara said with a toss of her thumb.

"Right on.. so it is a flashback." Kim said with an upward jab of the fist.

"Let's go!" Rupert said impatiently while taking both women by the arm. "Now I would appreciate a little more detail about your Uncle Salvador Giovanni."

Tam shook her head as they exited the store. "There's not much more to say except he's a jerk, he's got it in for me and he's got it in for you."

"Splendid."

"I gotta question." Kim butted in. "Assuming this is real, that Kevin, he was... ah, like dead?"

"Correct." Rupert answered as he unlocked the van. "He was most likely attacked sometime last night, killed by either Marvin or one of his minions." He motioned for the two to get in. "The initial rising usually happens with the next crossing of the sun past the horizon, that's when the demon enters the corpse. Many times the Sire will pinpoint the actual reanimation of the new creature by whispering an instruction to the drained vessel before he leaves the scene of the turning. Something like, 'rise in the night after burial' or words along those lines. When we were having to deal with Angelus he instructed his victim to wait until she heard the Slayer's voice. That way he used this unlucky creature to deliver a mocking message to Buffy." Rupert took off his glasses and began to clean them. "She arose from her casket in the funeral home. Anyway, as I was saying if the Sire is competent he will meet his new compatriot and show him or her the 'ropes' so to speak. But, here lately I have noticed a trend whereas the Sire basically abandons the new vampire without any instruction." He replaced the glasses onto his face and took a look around the parking lot before crawling into the van. "They don't even have the decency to bring them their first vessel anymore. But as we have seen 'Kevin' and his late teammates appear to have fed and also it would seem that they were following orders."

Tamara put her head into her hands. "I'm not sure what you just said but I've got a feeling that I really don't want to know."

"Condense that." Kim said lighting a cig.

"Kevin's team has been turned, that is killed and made into vampires. Marvin is close by. I have to get the Slayer's Cross before he does and if you want to leave I will understand."

"That's what I thought you said." Kim took a long drag and shrugged. "What the hell... I'm in... once you're dead another stabbin' ain't gonna hurt."

Raising her head Tam muttered. "You wanna use a different expression?"

"Too wet to plow, too cold to haul rocks?" Kim offered as she fidgeted a bit in her seat. "So Tam, what about you?"

"I'm in." She shrugged and looked at Rupert. "Guess your stuck with us. Now what?"

"Sleep. I'll take the first watch." Rupert volunteered. "You two try to rest and I'll wake you at 2:00 AM."

"Eight hours are up at 2:30, Right?" Tamara noted, she sighed and looked at Kim. "You okay?"

"As long as there are no more surprise confessions."

"Naaa, not from me." Tam said. She shot Rupert a questioning look. "How about you?" Her question to Giles was answered by a simple shake of his head. "Well Kimmie, we're clean. Guess it's your turn. You got any dark secrets to lay on us?"

Without answering Kim crawled into the front passenger seat and settled in.

"Kim?"

"Good-night. I gotta get some sleep, remember I'm driver number two."

"Kim?"

"Good-NIGHT!"