These are all the original airdates.
1/19/07
"Wagers of Sin"
4.11:
1/12/07
"Fleeting Cheating Meeting"
4.10: Ooo-kay. A very strange episode. Nicole
is a young woman who used to work at the Montecito before everyone except
Danny worked there. Ed cares about her like a daughter, and she's friends
with Delinda. She's coming back to visit, and she's bringing her relatively
new husband, Ollie (played by Judd Nelson). Everyone meets her, and
it's kinda unenthusiastic, and awkward in Danny's case. Ed immediately
tells Danny and Mike to watch Ollie because he doesn't like him and doesn't
trust him. Mike and Danny then turn around and catch him on camera
in an elevator making out with another woman. Danny doesn't think they
should bother Ed with it because it could be nothing (eyebrow raise, Danny),
but Mike thinks they need to tell Ed. Ed wants to kill Ollie, but he
gives him a very serious and Ed-scary talking to and one more chance.
Delinda and Nicole catch up, and Nicole expresses some dissatisfaction
with her marriage because of money problems and her suspicions that Ollie
has cheated on her. Nicole also ungracefully tells Delinda that she
and Danny used to date. Hmm. Delinda is caught off guard. OK
Go is coming to perform, and Mary and Sam fight over whose guests will get
more exclusive time with the band, Sam's whale or Mary's special favor to
Nicole. Danny's car is all better now (magic!), and Delinda broaches
the subject of Nicole with him. He brushes it off and says it was nothing.
Steve and Steve, who rent one of the Montecito residences, are breaking
up and leaving, so Black Steve, in a fit of anguish and jealousy, burns down
the house! Danny, Delinda, Mike, Sam, and Mary all had shares in the
house, so Delinda and Danny offer to buy the others out and then build their
"dream house" on the lot. Everybody is cool with that, so they make
the deal. Danny says Nicole is nuts, but they still have to follow
Ollie. Back when they were dating, Nicole told Danny she was pregnant
and wanted to marry him, but she wasn't pregnant. Danny really dislikes
and mistrusts her. After a lot of chasing Ollie and the stripper he
made out with in the elevator, they confront Ollie and he tells them that
Pomona the stripper was trying to blackmail him. Ed doesn't believe
him, obviously, but Danny kinda does. Sam steals OK Go from Mary so
they can hang out with her whale, Mr. Slocomb. Mary brings Nicole to
hang out with OK Go anyway, but she's mad at Sam, who learns how to "skate"
on the treadmill like OK Go does. Delinda apologizes to Danny for overreacting
to him and Nicole's past, and she has the stupid idea for each of them to
make a list of all the people they've slept with. Danny is all, this
is a bad idea, but Delinda insists. Danny makes his List, which isn't
really the true List, and Mike thinks the idea is dumb. Catching up
with Pomona the stripper, she denies trying to blackmail Ollie. Ed
says that Ollie can tell Nicole about his cheating, or he will. Ollie
is pouty about the whole thing. Delinda mentions that Nicole isn't
happy with Ollie and might divorce him, and this piques Danny's interest
so he begins to suspect Nicole. To get back at Sam for the OK Go theft,
Mary fills Sam's car with shaving cream! Sam is pissed. Danny
plants a tracker on Nicole. When they realize that they have very different
ideas about the dream house, Danny and Delinda begin to have seconde thoughts
about buying out the house. The others are kind of upset about that.
It seems uncool for them to back out on the deal. Mary and Sam
are still bickering. They track Nicole to Pomona, and it turns out
that Nicole set up the entire thing to get money out of Ollie before she
divorced him. Danny feels vindicated. OK Go perform at the Montecito,
and I think Danny and Delinda decide to buy out the house after all. Ugh.
That will be ugly. Ed admits that he was wrong about Ollie and
Nicole. Wow. Mary and Sam coldly stand next to each other as
they watch OK Go. Sam wryly says, "Mr. Slocomb thinks we should kiss
and make up." They snort derisively at that idea, and then a couple
beats go by. And then they turn toward each other and kiss. And
not just a peck, either. Like, full on mini-makeout with arms around
each other while Mr. Slocomb and Ollie watch with male amazement. And
then they abruptly part and go back to standing there watching OK Go like
nothing happened. HUH? Okay, I get that this was a ratings stunt,
but it was just strange. The context in which this kiss appeared does
nothing to explain away the, um, kind of passionate nature of the embrace.
Normally when primetime network television does a girl-on-girl kiss
for shock value and/or a spike in the ratings, it's done in a solely humorous
situation, or there are some extenuating circumstances that require the kiss.
It's usually implicitly or explicitly stated that these two female
characters are kissing because it's hilarious or because they have to for
some reason other than they are actually attracted to each other. So,
in this case, the Sam/Mary kiss was not overtly supposed to be funny; the
guys' reactions to it were funny, but the tone of the scene itself was not
one of laughter. And there was no compelling reason for them to do
it. So unless we're meant to understand that Mary and Sam actually
harbor an attraction for one another, the kiss is very odd and out of place.
I'm thinking it's the latter. Weird.
1/5/07
"Wines and Misdemeanors"
4.09: This episode was all about stolen wine and Delinda's
new sex toy. Joy. She buys this stupid vibrator thing and uses
it without Danny and he spends the rest of the episode worrying that she'll
like the vibrator better than him. Ugh. The Montecito is getting
ready to auction off some expensive wine and to get their wine cellar ready
for a grand opening. Danny and Mike are cleaning out some of Monica's
old cheap liquor stash, and Danny tosses Mike a bottle of what he thinks is
cheap wine, and Mike can't catch it, so it smashes all over the floor. And
right in front of Ed and Phillip, the snooty new wine expert guy he's hired
for the Montecito. Phillip is horrified and informs Danny that he just
broke a $30,000 bottle of wine from 1978. Ed is NOT happy. There's
a retirement convention going on at the hotel, and Mary laments the unchivalrous
nature of most younger men to Mike. She says that Mike and Danny are
exceptions. They auction two cases of the 1978 Montrachet to Mr. Chen
for one million dollars. The press is there and everything. Mr.
Chen opens a bottle right there and lets Ed taste it. Ed is a wannabe
wine connoiseur and excitedly says the wine is excellent. Mr. Chen
tastes it and says in a mildly unhappy tone that it's not what he expected.
Phillip tastes it and assures Mr. Chen and everyone that it's perfect,
exactly as the 1978 Montrachet should be. Mike takes a look at the label
of auctioned wine and immediately sees that it's a FAKE. They determine
that extra bottle Danny broke was the real thing, but someone swapped out
the two real cases of Montrachet for fakes before the auction. Danny
tells Ed what happened and they look at surveillance of the wine cellar. Mike
and Danny suspect Phillip because he had access and would know where to sell
million dollar wine. Ed disagrees. Mary apparently has no sex
life, and she and Sam are morbidly fascinated by this group of topless old
ladies doing water aerobics at the topless pool. Mike has been trying
all episode to get the old women away from the pool without being rude or
making it look like the hotel wants them to leave. Their, ahem, topless
old woman-ness is driving away business, apparently. So, despite Mike's
efforts, they're doing water aerobics. Sam borrows from Caddyshack and
puts a candy bar in the pool so all the ladies freak out and get out of the
pool. Eww. Phillip goes to Mike and Danny and says he knew it
wasn't the real wine, but he pretended like it was to save all their reputations.
They look at the footage again and figure out the construction guys
carried out the wine one bottle at a time inside a thermos. The old
ladies figure out it was a candy bar and subtly threaten to take legal action
against the hotel for age discrimination, so Mike and Sam have to let them
do whatever they want at the topless pool. Delinda has an idea, and
with some help from Mary, they get Thunder From Down Under (male exotic dancers)
to give the old ladies a private show in a hotel room--away from the topless
pool. The ladies are delighted, and no one has to look at their topless
grandma anymore. The pool is safe until the retirement convention ends.
Danny and Ed catch the construction worker wine thieves, who, after
some heavy persuasion from Ed, tell them who they sold the wine to. Ed
gets the wine back before Mr. Chen knows what happened, so everything is
okay. Mr. Chen gives Ed a bottle of the Montrachet as a thank you, and
Ed is moved. He will finally be able to taste a $30,000 bottle of wine!
But then Phillip runs to catch Mr. Chen before he leaves, and he knocks
the bottle out of Ed's hand so it smashes on the floor. Ed is very,
very unhappy. Poor Ed. :( And Delinda assures Danny that no toy
could ever replace the real thing. Whatev. Like I care. And
that's the end. I wish the writers could tear themselves away from
Danny and Delinda's sex life for, like, five minutes. God knows I'm
sick of it. And there was barely any Danny/Mary after the last episode's
plethora of squee-worthy moments. :(
12/15/06
"White Christmas"
4.08: While the Montecito is having a fake snowstorm
in front of the hotel in 95º weather and Danny and Mike are having
a snowball fight, someone dressed like one of the little people elves running
around the heavily Christmas decorated hotel drives off in Danny's car.
Danny gets just a tad upset. Ed is a cranky Santa (and it's
hilarious). Delinda is making big plans for Christmas with Danny.
No one really wants to do the annual staff Secret Santa exchange,
but Mary makes Ed do it. Mary is called away to two little girls in
the hotel who asked for her by name, and she asks them what she can do for
them. These two adorable little girls introduce themselves, and their
last name is Connell, like Mary. They are her sisters. Whoa.
Mary freaks out and immediately asks the girls if their father (her
bastard evil father too) is there. He's not. Mary urgently asks,
"Did he hurt you?" Neither girl answers at all, but it looks to me like
the answer might be yes. I think Mary thinks so too. No idea
where their mom is, looks like they're alone. Danny runs up to ask
Mary about the elves because one of them stole his car. She looks positively
shell-shocked and tells Danny "these are my little sisters." Danny
takes one look at them and immediately asks "Is your father here?" in this
urgent, protective tone. EEEEEE! I love when he gets protective
of Mary. Gives me warm fuzzies. It was just so cute. Danny
has to leave because someone tells him they spotted his car. When he
gets there, the elf is gone and so is the car. Some man drove off with
it. Delinda and Sam are talking, and Sam ends
up making this awesome comment about Danny and Delinda always having sex:
"You two couldn't stop banging each other if your lives depended on it."
HA! Mary calls the girls' mom, who tells Mary over the phone that
her father is in jail awaiting trial for what he's done. The girls'
mom finally had him arrested. Mary blames herself for for letting the
girls possibly be abused because she didn't do something about her father,
and Danny reassures and comforts her. Honestly, this was probably the
best Danny/Mary stuff all season, and the episode only gets better. :D At
the dreaded Secret Santa drawing, Mary draws Delinda's name. Delinda
draws Danny, but everyone makes her choose again since she's dating Danny
and it wouldn't be fair. She draws Sam. Hmm. Sam draws Ed,
Ed draws Mike, Mike draws Danny, and Danny then obviously gets Mary. SQUEE.
Everybody starts worrying about what to get their Secret Santa person.
With the surveillance equipment, they figure out that the elf is not
a little person hired by the hotel but a kid in an elf suit. Danny
is very distraught over his stolen car. Again, they spot Danny's car,
and he's off after it. Delinda tells Mary she doesn't understand why
Danny is so freaked out about this car, and Mary tells her in this sad, knowing
tone that shows how well she knows Danny that it was his mother's car. After
his mother died, his dad fixed up her car and gave it to Danny and made him
promise not to ever let anything happen to it. Sad squee. Mary
really knows Danny, and Delinda doesn't know how to help him. Danny
watches some guy race his car on a track, and something happens and the guy
makes it out of the before it explodes! Danny is beside himself.
:( For Secret Santa, Sam gives Ed a session with Polly, the truly terrifying
spa lady who gives him mani, pedi, and massage (also threatens to give him
a "happy ending" if he wants, *shudder*). Delinda gives Sam a puppy!
SO CUTE. Sam is all, I don't want this, but really, it's perfect
for her. She needs someone to love and who will love her back. Mary
gives Delinda this box with tons of old memories of Danny in it, and she
tries to give Delinda Danny's old letterman jacket. Delinda doesn't
want to take it because it was a gift for Mary from Danny, but Mary insists
that Delinda have it. SAD. Mary's stepmother arrives then and
asks Mary to testify against her father. Delinda tries to leave to
give them some privacy, but Mary is so upset that she grabs Delinda's hand
and won't let her leave. She tells the stepmom no and runs off. Sam's
whale named Reggie, who seems to be one of her favorite whales, is dying,
and Sam has a hard time with that. She stays with him when he dies
and even lets him hold the puppy. Aww, poor suffering Sam. :( It's
Christmas Eve, and Danny comes with Mary to see her sisters. He didn't
have to come with her, but he wanted to. *dies* "Sure you don't
want me to come in with you?" he asks Mary. She's sure; she'll be
okay. Sigh. I LOVE Concerned!Danny. She goes in and reads
"The Night Before Christmas" to her little sisters. Awww. Ed's
present to Mike is a phone call from Mr. Stephen Hawking! Mike is
so cute and excited to talk to Stephen Hawking. Too much. Delinda
is sad because Danny isn't home on Christmas Eve (and Ellen has an evil
chuckle). He's out tracking down the kid that stole his car. He
finds him all alone with his two little siblings in an apartment. Their
mom is a hooker who's been gone for days, and Danny goes from mad to heartbroken
for the kids in about five seconds. He takes them all to a children's
shelter. Mary kisses her little half-sisters good night and then tells
their mom that she will testify against her father. Good for you,
Mary. This is why I love you (and Danny does too). Danny goes
home late and wakes up the next morning to find presents in the living room
and no Delinda. He takes some presents to the three kids at the shelter,
and the little girl is so happy to see him, I almost died of the adorableness.
Danny then meets up with Delinda at a garage, and everyone is there:
Ed, Mike, Mary, Sam, and Delinda. They're all gonna chip in and buy
the parts to fix Danny's car. *sniffle* Mike gives Danny Beer
of the Month Club membership for Christmas, and they're boys, so it's a
great gift. Sigh. Danny then gives Mary this little box for
Christmas and tells her to open it when she's alone. And then, all
of them happy and together on Christmas, the episode ends! What did
Mary get from Danny??? I must know!!! NBC showed this little
webisode thing on their site of Mary opening the gift, but I missed it.
Okay, just went and looked it up, and it was an old picture of them
as kids! The frame says "Danny and Mary Friends Forever," and on the
back it says "Mary's 8th birthday." SQUEEEEE. Oh, if only more
episodes of Las Vegas had this much Danny/Mary amazingness.
12/8/06
"Meatball Montecito"
4.07: Holy mother of god. Yet ANOTHER episode
that starts with Danny and Delinda waking up together. At least this
time they were further along in the process so that they're actually getting
ready for work and stuff. Danny wants Delinda to take it easy after
her ordeal with the kidnapping, but she says she's fine and wants to go back
to work. Then they start getting on each other's cases about little
pet peevey things they do in the new living arrangement (well, mostly Danny
has annoyances with Delinda). She says his being a bad dancer annoys
her, and Danny gets offended. Oooh, a fight! Okay, not really
a fight, but I was pretty freaking tired of watching those two be all kissy
and perfect and crap. There's gonna be a mob wedding at the hotel if
Ed can end his feud with Wayne Newton (which turns out to be over a golf disagreement).
The hotel will lose money and rep points if Wayne doesn't perform at
this wedding, plus...it's the mob. Mike offers to teach Danny to dance,
but Danny still insists that he's not a bad dancer. Mary has to put
up with the whole "million dollar wedding" nightmare and pesters Ed to make
up with Wayne. Delinda is polling people about what annoys them about
Danny so she can put things on her list that she's going to give Danny later.
Sam tells Delinda the things that annoy her about Danny. Sam's
whale this ep was Sharky, this old guy who was buds with the Rat Pack. A
high school kid straying from his class trip wants to lose his virginity
and mistakes Mary for a call girl! Poor Mary. The wedding party
are looking at diamond rings, and the diamonds are stolen on their way back
to the dealer. Danny thinks it was one of the mob guys, but Ed disagrees.
The wedding nightmare explodes with the parents of the bride (mob)
and groom (white, rich non-mob) getting into a fight. Danny tells Delinda
to go home, and she gets carried away with the list thing. Sharky,
who is really freaking old, tells Sam not to wait too long to have a family
because she might have regrets later. She says she's not into having
a family and she's fine the way she is, but I think she's not happy being
alone and all about the whales and the money. Sam isn't as tough as
she pretends she is. The high school kid finally gets laid and then
starts running a mini-brothel out of his hotel room for geeks who want to
lose their virginity, and Mike is crazy mad. So naturally, he gets
some of the mob goons from the wedding to scare the kid out of the sex business
forever. They "lean" on him a little bit in the elevator, and he gets
the message. HEE! Go Mike! It turns out that the groom's
father stole the diamonds, so he gets carted off. Ed apologizes to
Wayne Newton on the giant digital sign on top of the Montecito, so Wayne
agrees to sing at the mob wedding after all. Danny and Delinda apologize
to each other and drop the lists, and Delinda decides to talk to a therapist
about her kidnapping. Danny dances at the wedding, and he REALLY can't
dance, but Delinda lurves him so much that she dances with him all silly.
BLEH. Mary, Mike, and Sam watch this, and Sam shakes her head
and says, "That is one spastic couple." I couldn't agree more, Sam.
This ep was okay. Not great. Danny and Mary barely had
anything to do with each other all episode. Eh.
12/1/06
"Delinda's Box" (Part 1 and 2)
4.05, 4.06: Holy crap. Longest Las Vegas ever.
I mean, yeah, it probably was technically the longest at two hours,
but I really felt those two hours. I don't know if it really
needed to be a two hour episode. Maybe an hour and a half. Actually,
if you had just cut out all the dumb stuff with Sam and her whales, it could
have been an hour. The episode starts with Ed getting beat up in the
desert by a bad guy (played by guest star Christopher McDonald) and his bad
guy friends. Since the bad guy didn't have a name that I caught, I'm
just gonna call him Bad Guy, okay? Cool. Anyhoo, Bad Guy tells
Ed that they have Delinda, and Ed's all "you're dead." Bad Guy laughs
that off and says that Ed will steal him 50 million from the Montecito of
Delinda dies. They put Delinda in this coffin-like box in the ground,
and she's screaming and carrying on ad nauseum, and they lock her in with
a 12 hour supply of oxygen. Ed has that long to get the money, and
he can't tell anyone what's going on or she dies. They lock this ackle
thing on him that lets Bad Guy hear everything Ed does and says, and it has
explosives on it. So they send Ed off to get the money, and they bury
Delinda somewhere that Ed doesn't know. Delinda bought Danny the ugliest
shirt ever, and he starts worrying when he can't find her or get her on
the phone. Sam spends the first hour of the episode chasing after
these two nutcase morons who won the lottery and brought two million dollars
each in cash. They play this stupid game of hide and seek the whole
time, and Sam can't get them to gamble. Whatever. Ed stonewalls
Danny and tells him this foolish lie that Delinda is with her sister Nessa
(?!) and will call him later. You couldn't have told a more insane
lie than that, Ed? Mary asks Ed if she can give the Montecito an official
mascot, and wanting to get rid of her so he can get to the 50 million, he
says yeah, sure. Ed is being watched by guys in the casino who work
for Bad Guy. Jillian looks at Danny like he's crazy when he says that
Ed told him that Delinda is with Nessa, and now Danny is more worried than
ever. He confronts Ed about the Nessa lie and Delinda's true whereabouts,
and Ed blows him off and gets rid of him because he knows that Bad Guy is
listening. Ed orders 25 million in extra cash for the casino, and
now Danny is really suspicious. Ed shuts down half the casino and
fires his cage manager in order to pull the other 25 million off the floor.
Mary's mascot, Monty Montecito, is a pervert in a big foam prospector's
costume. She and Mike have to throw him out later because of all the
inappropriate, um, touching of female casino guests. Mike even gets
in a fistfight with Monty. Pretty funny. :) Danny and Mike try
to figure out the Ed thing, and they look at video surveilance of Ed and
Bad Guy in the elevator and then footage of Delinda getting into a strange
SUV and put it together that she's been kidnapped and Ed is trying to get
her back. They decide to help him. Danny subtly lets Ed know
that he knows what's happening, and Ed shows him the ankle bracelet. There's
this interesting exchange of information on toilet paper in the bathroom
between Ed and Danny. Hee. Ed pulls the 50 million together and
puts it all in a truck, which he drives. Danny gets in the Montecito
helicopter and waits for Ed to tell him where Delinda is. Bad Guy
and his buddies lead Ed's truck out into the desert, and while out there,
Ed punches Bad Guy and puts a tracker on him in the scuffle. Bad Guy
is cranky and takes the money. They give Ed coordinates, but take
the keys to his truck so he can't go anywhere. Thankfully, Danny is
already in the air and waiting. Ed gives him the coordinates and the
box combo, and they get there and dig up the box, but it's empty! Bad
Guy already came and took Delinda! Ed's ankle bomb is about to explode,
but Danny left him some stuff in the truck to freeze the counter and cut
off the bomb. There was a tense string of moments after the explosion
where we're supposed to wonder if Ed is alive (Danny certainly fears the
worst), but he's alright and tells Danny to come get him. Bad Guy tells
Delinda that Ed is dead, but not so much. Mary, meanwhile, is freaking
out because everyone is either gone foiling a kidnapping or has called in
sick, so for the second hour of the ep, she has to cover for, like, EVERYONE.
She is a terrible waitress and spills food on this guy, she has to
perform housekeeping duties and walks in on the same guy naked while he does
his exercises, and then she has to cover for the massage therapist and ends
up with the SAME guy (who has the hairiest back ever). She drops her
gum in the hair on his back and has to cut it out because it's so stuck in
the hair. Gross, embarrassing, awful. Finally, Mary has to DJ
at Mystique, and she ends up asking that same guy to dance, and he's a terrible
dancer. However, he is a hotel critic, and he decides to give the Montecito
a good review because they try so hard to please their guests. Ha.
I feel bad for Mary, getting such ridiculous storylines. Sam
too. I feel like Ed, Danny, Delinda, and Mike get all the meaningful
things to do while Mary and Sam get crap to wade through every episode. Dumb.
Anyway, Mike and Sam try to catch a Buddhist monk in the act of cheating
because he wins everything he does. They never catch him because he
isn't really cheating. He just has good karma. Bad Guy has Delinda
tied up in a warehouse in the desert, and she assures all the bad guys that
they are all going to die. Bad Guy demands a jet from Ed, and Ed summarily
says NO, he's running things now. Jillian knows what's going on now,
and she wants to call the authorities, and Ed won't let her. He's taking
care of this himself. Ed tells Bad Guy to let Delinda go and take him
instead, and at the supposed exchange, they try to kill Ed. Danny saves
him, and Ed beats Bad Guy Christopher McDonald's ass but good. Then
he drags him off somewhere we don't see. Danny shoots all the other
bad guys and saves Delinda; they are all gross with the hugging and kissing.
Ed and Delinda are reunited, and everyone is okay. All the guys
are dead, just like Ed and Delinda promised they would be. We then
see what happened to Bad Guy. Ed buried him in The Box. Ouch.
Okay, this was an okay episode, but I don't get why Ed and Danny can
just shoot all those guys (somewhat justifiably, either by way of self defense
or trying to protect Delinda) and not have to answer for it AT ALL. It
bothers me. So yeah. This giant-sized Las Vegas was okay. Delinda
still kinda gets on my nerves.
11/17/06
"History of Violins"
4.04: When Danny and Delinda come back from their
New England trip away together, they've brought Jordan and Woody with them.
They also decide to move in together officially. Bleh. Jordan
and Woody are investigating a murder than happened back East and a stolen
violin related to the case. However, they discover that the valuable
Stradivarius that the murdered guy's brother put in a safety deposit box
in the Montecito has been stolen because someone tunneled through the floor
and into the room. Oops. A loose pet rat apparently chewed through
the wires, allowing the thieves to tunnel up without tripping the alarms
in the floor. Again, oops. Annoyed, Ed assigns Mike to catch
the rat. He and Danny try to get the stolen property back without
involving the cops. Sam is avoiding Woody because she stood him up
at Delinda's almost-wedding, and Woody acts like a jealous idiot. Oh,
and apparently Mary is still doing stand-up comedy. Hee! I love
Mary. She's precious. Delinda and Ed crawl into the tunnel in
the floor to see where it goes, and Delinda tells Ed that she and Danny
are moving in together. Ed says wonderful, that's great, honey. Delinda
is confused as to why Ed isn't flipping out. Ed says he likes Danny,
he's like family, and he thinks it's great. There's funny moment while
they're crawling through the tunnel where Delinda mutters, "I feel like
Mulder and Scully." "Who?" "Never mind." Yay! I love X-Files
references. Jordan asks Mary for more information on Mike (because
they had a nice interaction earlier and she might be interested). Mary
pimps Mike's best stats like a champ. Danny and Delinda start the moving
process, and Delinda says she needs to make a few changes, and Danny stupidly
agrees to let her do anything she wants because relationships need trust,
he trusts her, blah blah blah. Mike chases down the pet rat, and Jordan
catches him at it. They're having a nice flirty exchange in her room
when the rat appears on her shoulder and she throws it across the room,
killing it. Mike is deeply offended that she would kill the rat like
that, and he stalks out. So that's the end of Mike and Jordan. Whatev.
Delinda starts turning Danny's apartment upside down, throwing out
his favorite armchair. Ed and Danny find the thief, a woman, and it
turns out that she's been working with the dead guy's brother the whole time.
They get the violin and other stolen property back, and everything
is good. Danny comes home to find his chair gone and half his clothes
either in storage or thrown out. But he holds back his reaction and
lets everything slide because he wants to have a "trusting" relationship
with Delinda. I hope to God they don't get married. I don't think
I could stand having them be all gross with each other all the time. Next
week: Delinda is held hostage! Ohnoes!
11/10/06
"The Story of Owe"
4.03: Why does every episode have to begin with
Danny and Delinda having sex? I could do without that, thanks. Danny
and Delinda spend most of their time toying with the idea of moving in together,
and eventually they decide to go away together for a few days just to try
it out and see how living together works out for them. Whatever. Three
of Sam's whales stiff the hotel for a whole lot of money, and she wants
her commission. So Ed gets a guy he knows to take Sam and "encourage"
the whales to pay up. It was pretty funny, watching Sam get all excited
about this gruff, hitman-type guy rough her whales up. She even got
to beat on the female whale herself. Ha. They all pay up, of
course. Ed tries to teach this mousey millionaire how to have a backbone,
and he stages a situation in which Mike is an unruly customer and Ed has
to beat his ass and throw him out. Poor Mike gets slammed into a few
walls. :( It looks like Mary has cooled down, and she's at least cool
with Mike. Mike tells her that he knew she wasn't always as sweet and
happy as she pretended to be, and she admits to faking it about a third of
the time. Then, she says, she stopped faking, and then she got more
assertive, and then she thought that dating Casey would make everything better,
but then he ran off with his bodyguards. Then the thing with Danny
and Delinda happened, "which I shouldn't give a rat's ass about...but I do.
Maybe nothing changes, right?" Mike tells her that confronting
her worst fear will make her feel more in control of her life. She
tells him he's full of crap at first, but then she decides that since she's
terrified of standup comedy, she'll try it. She does a few minutes
of open mic stuff, but she tanks. She's terrible. Mike is supportive,
and Adam Carolla even gives her some advice on simply drawing from her personal
life experience instead of making up jokes. She decides to try it
again, and this time Mike tells everybody, and they all come to see her.
I had a small happy moment when Danny seemed to be kinda excited to
go see her, even though Delinda said "but Mary's not funny" and Danny says
"I know!" Mary ends up making fun of Ed in her set, and everyone laughs
at that. So, an enjoyable episode. I'm glad that Mary isn't fighting
with everyone anymore, but I'm sad for her anyway. I'm sad for the
loss of Danny/Mary in general. I still think that as long as Danny
and Delinda don't get married and start having babies, there's still hope.
I love Delinda, but I just can't stand her and Danny together. I
would rather see Danny and Sam together than Danny and Delinda (if I can't
have Danny/Mary, that is). Don't know why, but there it is.
11/3/06
"Died In Plain Sight"
4.02: Ugh, so yeah. Danny and Delinda are
together and have lots of sex. Blah. Sam is trying to get this
list of the biggest whales on the planet from Natalie, this big time real
estate chick in Hawaii (played by guest star Kelly Hu), but it hinges on
her wrapping up the investigation into the dead stripper in Brian's Hawaiian
Montecito villa. At the Montecito, the staff has to take this sexual
harrassment seminar, and Mary throws an unsubtle jab about office romances
in Danny and Delinda's direction. Delinda jabs right back, and it's
not pleasant. Danny and Delinda discuss it later, and Delinda says,
"You're my boyfriend, and I don't care who knows it." Huh. Mike
goes to Hawaii to help Sam with the dead stripper thing, and they end up
clearing Brian (Sam's whale) and implicating Natalie in the murder in the
process. Natalie wanted some land that Brian owned, so she orchestrated
the whole thing. So, Sam doesn't get the list of the world's biggest
whales, and Natalie gets turned in. I don't know if I'm the only one
who picked up on this, but Natalie was kind of...hitting on Sam the whole
time. Not in an obvious way, but still. Yeah. Back in Vegas,
Mary confronts Danny again. The confrontation went something like this:
"You gonna slap me again?" "Why'd you have to shove it in my face?" "What
about you and Casey--" "First of all, Casey's gone, all right. So there
is no me and Casey anymore." Skipping some stuff about how Danny didn't get
mad about her and Jake, Mary goes on to say, "I'm not mad about you and Delinda.
I'm mad that neither one of you respect me enough to tell me the truth."
Then she walks off. Boy, Mary is hurt. And I can
understand why Danny and Delinda don't get why she has any right to be mad,
but I can totally see Mary's perspective here too. Clearly, she is
still in love with Danny and always will be, and she's afraid to be with
him in a permanent way, but that doesn't mean that she's going to feel great
when he gets with someone else and doesn't think to tell her. Later
on, Mary and Delinda have a mini-fight. Mary is mad and wants to know
why Delinda didn't tell her. Delinda loses it and says, "Danny wanted
to marry you. You gave him his ring back. It's over.
Get over it." Oh, Delinda was pissed. And so is Mary.
She's even mad at Mike, too. I expect that when Sam gets back
from Hawaii, Mary will let her have it too. Danny makes a public announcement
to most of the staff that Delinda is his girlfriend. *eyeroll* And
that's pretty much it, except for some more stuff with Ed trying to get
the CIA off his back. Oh, and Sam learns that Casey might be selling
the Montecito! To whom?! Yikes.
10/27/06
Season Four Premiere: "Father of the Bride
Redux"
4.01: Argh! Due to a freak loss of power,
the VCR managed to tape an hour of strange and unexplained static instead
of the premiere. So, this
is the most thorough recap I could find. It bothers me that no one can
seem to say anything intelligent about the episode. I found a few episode
clips, and from those and the recaps I have managed to glean that Ed is okay,
but taking care of bidness away from Las Vegas for a while. Delinda
and Danny are together-ish (?). Mary finds out accidentally from
Sam and Mike, and apparently does not take it well. She wishes Danny
and Delinda would have told her sooner. I think she's also upset because...she's
upset. I wish I had more concrete info on this. Sorry. I'm
as bummed out as you. UPDATE: Just did some digging around on message
boards, and apparently when Mary confronted Danny about not telling her,
he said something about how the Delines are the closest thing to family
he has. Oh. Hell. No. Mary slapped him because she
thought she was his family too. I mean, hello?! Stupid Danny.
