Green Edged Spam
This poem is based on 'Green Eggs and Ham' by Dr Seuss.
In this poem, Hawkeye has come to the Mess Tent after a gruelling day in the OR, and the only thing to eat is Spam so old that it has begun to go green around the edges. In his tired state, Hawkeye hallucinates that Uncle Sam is trying to convince him to eat the Spam.
I am Sam
Uncle Sam
That Uncle Sam
That Uncle Sam
I do not like that Uncle Sam
Do you like this green-edged Spam?
I do not like it, Uncle Sam.
I do not like this green-edged Spam.
Would you like it here or there?
I would not like it here or there.
I would not like it anywhere.
I do not like this green-edged Spam.
I do not like it, Uncle Sam.
Would you like it in Korea?
Would you like it with tortilla?
I do not like it in Korea.
I do not like it with tortilla.
I do not like it here or there.
I do not like it anywhere.
I do not like this green-edged Spam.
I do not like it, Uncle Sam.
Would you eat it for a wager?
Would you eat it with a major?
Not for a wager.
Not with a major.
Not in Korea.
Not with tortilla.
I would not eat it here or there.
I would not eat it anywhere.
I would not eat this green-edged Spam.
I do not like it, Uncle Sam.
Would you? Could you? In a stew?
This surplus Spam from World War Two.
I would not, could not, in a stew.
You may like it, I would suggest,
You may like it with lemon zest.
I sure would not with lemon zest.
Not in a stew, give it a rest!
I do not like it in Korea.
I do not like it with tortilla.
I do not like it for a wager.
I do not like it with a major.
I do not like it here or there.
I do not like it anywhere.
I do not like this green-edged Spam.
I do not like it, Uncle Sam.
A bar! A bar!
A bar! A bar!
Could you, would you,
In a bar?
Not in a bar! No lemon zest!
Not in a stew! Give it a rest!
I would not, could not, in Korea.
I could not, would not, with tortilla.
I will not eat it for a wager.
I will not eat it with a major.
I will not eat it here or there.
I will not eat it anywhere.
I do not like this green-edged Spam.
I do not like it, Uncle Sam.
Say! In the Mess?
Here in the Mess!
Would you, could you,
In the Mess?
I would not, could not, in the Mess.
Would you, could you, in OR?
I would not, could not, in OR.
Not in the Mess, not in a bar.
Not in a stew. No lemon zest.
I do not like it, shoo, you pest.
Not for a wager. Not in Korea.
Not with a major. Not with tortilla.
I will not eat it here or there.
I do not like it anywhere!
You do not like this green-edged Spam?
I do not like it, Uncle Sam.
Could you, would you, with Nurse Kellye?
I would not, could not, with Nurse Kellye.
Would you, could you, served with jelly?
I could not, would not, served with jelly.
I will not, will not, with Nurse Kellye.
I will not eat it in OR.
I will not eat it in a bar.
Not in the Mess! No lemon zest!
Not in a stew! Give it a rest!
I do not like it for a wager.
I do not like it with a major.
I do not like it in Korea.
I do not like it with tortilla.
I do not like them here or there.
I do not like them ANYWHERE!
I do not like this green-edged Spam!
I do not like it, Uncle Sam!
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