The Drug Induced Dream

(Scott stands with a Toronot Maple Leaf jacket on)
I dreamed we were taping our Kids in the Hall show in LA instead of Toronto. We were taping in a huge, beautiful state of the art studio in Century City.

Mark and Lorne Michaels were arguing over a catch phrase for the chicken lady. Mark thought the phrase should be, "I would really love to have an egg imediatley." But Lorne thought that was too many words for a t-shirt. So he suggested, "Gotta get laid!" Mark LOVED it and imediatley told his lawyer to write it up.

I was mean while in the corner studying my lines for the next scene. Or maybe I was doing lines. Anwyay, I was having a very difficult time remembering my next line. My assistant kept saying, "You've just done one." I kept saying, "No, I don't think that's the next line." And then I would do another line.

Then, Bruce's personal trainer, Body By Jake, who was also our director, burst in flushed with endorphins from a morning workout..To anounce..that Cher did not have a seat for the studio taping. Well, the entire day's rehersal was canceled and Bruce scurried off to call a press confrence. Just then, Kevin and Dave walked in. They had been missing for 3 days. Apparently, they had been doing a commercial in Hawaii. Simon and Hecubus for Nisan.

The next thing I know, the 3 of us are all at the Anihiem Pond, playing a benefit hockey game against the Mighty Ducks. The stands were filled with celebrities and their trainers all cheering and ding lines. Everyone was wearing a red ribbon except me and Don Cherry.

Now, the game was taking an awful long time to conclude, so I thought I'd hurry things ups by scoring on my own goal and there by winning the game for the Mighty Ducks! Then, one of the Mighty Ducks lifted me up on his shoulders and carried me triumphetly around the rink. While all the other celebrites cheered. Then, the Mighty Duck took off his helmet and it was...Mike Myers! I said "Butta" he said "Faclemnt" and we laughted our heads off.

The next thing I know I was accepting an Oscar and the only person I thanked was Tom Hanks. When I got home there was an angry message on my answering machine from my coke dealer. Chastising me for not acknologing him. I didn't care. I cut the phone lines, did a line, popped a zanex, and fell asleep.
When I woke up the next morning, I was still in Toronto. I realized it was all just a drug induced dream. I felt sad. So I did another line. And I felt sad. So I did another line!