A.N.D. - Through the Looking Glass

“What?”

He shook his head. “I have to talk to Maggie first, get her to help. Until I get back, don’t tell anyone we’ve made up. I want Angel to think she’s won-for now.” He gave her a kiss and disappeared.

Virginia walked alone to the room over the kitchen, to find Littlebit curled up on her sleeping bag, rereading the book that Tony had bought her. The wolf woman took one sniff and jumped to her feet, the back of her skirts swaying as her truncated tail wagged. “You’ve made up!” She rushed to hug Virginia. “Oh, I’m so glad! The whole camp has been talking about...” She tossed her head eloquently in the direction of Angel’s trailer. “I knew he’d never, but I didn’t know if you knew.”

Virginia sighed, discovering that her new happiness didn’t quite erase her old unhappiness. “I didn’t know what to think. Until Wolf appeared out of the woods and demanded I talk to him. We’ve been up there for hours, talking.”

“More than talking,” Littlebit said wryly.

“More than talking,” Virginia confessed with a blush. “We... forgave each other for our misunderstandings.”

Littlebit curled up with her chin on her knees, smiling as if she was hearing a wonderful bedtime story. “Forgiveness...” she whispered wistfully, then loudly “I’m so happy. I’m so happy!”

It was a joy that both Littlebit and Virginia had to stifle. When Wolf finally returned that night, all he would say was that he and Maggie had “fixed it” and that they all had to pretend to still be fighting.

“This is fixed?” Littlebit asked skeptically. Wolf bared his teeth at her and she didn’t challenge him again.

“It’s going to be all right. It’s going to be all over tomorrow. Trust me,” Wolf whispered to Virginia as he curled up next to her, cradling her in his arms. “We fought the queen by tricking her, and we’ll trap Angel the same way.”

“Remember, we all still act like we’re fighting,” Wolf reminded them before they went down to get breakfast.

“I don’t understand!” Littlebit complained. “Why can’t we just tell everyone Angel was lying?”

“Because then she’ll think of something else to do to us. I want her relaxed and off guard until my plan is finished,” Wolf explained.

“Tell me what the plan is,” Virginia said. She thought it was a perfectly reasonable request, but Wolf scratched nervously at his temple.

“I started this, and I want to fix it. Will you trust me? Please?”

Virginia stared at him through narrowed eyes. “You sound like my father hatching one of his schemes.”

“But my schemes work!” Wolf pointed out defensively. “This’ll be like swapping the troll dust for the poison. The only way the queen let her guard down enough for me to do it was to think that she’d won, that she was in total control. I want Angel to think that way today.” He cocked his head, giving her his most earnest expression. “Trust me? Please?”

“But I don’t know how to help if I don’t know what’s going on. What’s my role?”

“Your role is to let Angel think you’re still mad at me.”

Virginia grit her teeth. She hated not knowing what was going on. Years of cleaning up after her father’s failed plans had taught her to never give up control. But if she didn’t trust Wolf now, would she ever trust him?

“Okay.” It was a huge effort to say it, but the delight on Wolf’s face was a reward. “But you have to promise me that it all ends today!”

“I do, I do! I swear, before we go to bed tonight, the whole camp will know that Angel is a liar!”

“What about me?” Littlebit asked quietly from her corner.

“While I’m working on Angel, I want you to follow the man she was with last night. You’re not stuck to a schedule like we are. Follow him. Find out what he fears.” His eyes turned yellow. “Become what he fears.”

Virginia was stunned as timid little Littlebit bared very pointed teeth in a mirthless grin. “I’m glad to defend the honor of my pack leaders.”

Wolf nodded once. “Showtime!”

And indeed it was. Once again they fixed the informal breakfasts in silence-silence that was broken when Angel leaned through the hatch and cooed, “How did you sleep last night, Virginia?”

As the day wore on, Virginia found it quite easy to act like she was still confused and upset. Angel was being totally insufferable, Littlebit was gone, and Wolf seemed to be trying to chat up every single female at the faire. He was not only hanging out with Little Red and the other storytelling actresses, he seemed to be running around with every wench, and any time he wasn’t with an adult, he was whispering to the rose girls. Wolf had been mildly flirting with the underaged rose sellers all faire long for the sheer wolfish joy of it, but otherwise had shown little interest in them-until today.

It would have been easier to bear if she knew the plan, but she didn’t. I hope it involves biting! Maybe some scratching too. Angel wandered by, her arm around a grinning Wolf. Wonder what my mother’s recipe for poison was?

How could she have ever thought the faire was a magical, wonderful place? It had seemed so when she was fifteen and Dad had brought her here as a treat with a little money he’d won on a bet. She’d begged and begged to be part of it, and was burstingly proud when he wrangled her a job with the underaged rose sellers. First year as a rose girl, then she met Maggie and Roz and got promoted to costumes. And then she’d turned eighteen... and met Larry.

Okay, time to think of something else. There weren’t any customers, and she really didn’t want to think about Larry. Roses, when she was a rose girl there had been a code to the roses, let’s see, could she remember it? Red was love, of course, white was purity, purple was fantasy…

Maggie bustled by with a series of $20 bills sticking out of her bodice.

“You’ve had a good day!” Virginia greeted her.

“I love winning bets,” was the cryptic answer. Then Maggie looked both ways, and tiptoed up to the booth. “Don’t worry, it’s all in motion,” she whispered to Virginia. Larry, who was passing, moved forward and Maggie raised her voice, turning to Nantucket Nan. “You, pay up.” Nan grumbled and added another bill to the collection, while Larry shook his head and passed on.

For the rest of the day Virginia watched like a hawk, but she still couldn’t tell what they were up to. What was going on? When was this all going to be over? The more time passed, the less she felt like playing along and the more she wondered if the joke was being played on her. Just how much did she trust Wolf? This leap of faith was hard. Oh, it was so hard! Giving up control, even for a single day, was a huge strain. But their love was worth it... she hoped.

The worst was when Wolf never showed up for his storytelling round. Virginia had been hoping for a wink, a nod, some sort of a sign, but he never showed up at all. Children had gathered to wait for him too; they all scrambled in surprise when his voice suddenly rang out from the other side of the coin-striking booth, the story punctuated with the sound of the heavy hammer as it fell. “Once upon a time (thunk!) there was a prince who was as spoiled and (thunk!) selfish as he was rich and handsome. (thunk!) Now, fairy godmothers don’t like spoiled princes and princesses. (thunk!) So they set out to teach him a (thunk!) lesson. Not the kind of lesson you (thunk!) learn in school, but the kind of lesson you learn in fairy tales. They (thunk!) turned him into a dog…”

The trap was finally sprung at the post-weekend meeting, held at the council fire area before the weekend-only workers headed home. Angel was disgustingly triumphant, taking every opportunity in her performance report to nitpick at Virginia. She even took a few potshots about “unlicensed workers” at Littlebit, who had returned without a word or explanation.

About the only performer who didn’t get a nasty critique was Wolf, not that he was paying much attention. He was in the middle of a huddle of rose girls, whispering throughout the meeting. Larry, on the other hand, was paying all too much attention. As the meeting went on and Angel took every opportunity to dump on him, he got angrier and angrier, finally exploding in a shouting fit about how Angel was a slut, Wolf was an opportunist, and Virginia was too pathetic to know how to hold onto a man.

There was a frozen silence as everyone tried to decide how they were going to handle that. Everyone except for Angel, who was the veteran of a hundred fights with her husband. She stuck her nose in the air and sniffed, “I find Wolf to be very kind and generous. He knows how to treat me properly. He’s been promising to give me a gift all day.”

“Oh, yes,” Wolf said, as every eye turned to Virginia. His voice was calm and conversational, but she knew him well enough to catch the slight cold edge to his tone. “That reminds me, I wanted to give it to you now so everyone can see. I’ve been working with the rose girls all day to get you the perfect dozen roses.”

Angel cooed. Larry turned red. Virginia felt the blood drain from her face. I do trust him, I do trust him, I do, I do...

Wolf put a hand behind his back and one of the girls slapped something into it. He stepped forward and presented the bundle with such a fast, elaborate flourish that it was impossible to get a good look until the flowers were held aloft in Angel’s triumphant hands.

One dozen black roses. All withered and dead.

A gasp went up from the gathered workers. Even those who didn’t know the rose code could grasp the insult. Those who did knew exactly what the bouquet stood for. Black for hatred. Dead for malice.

Angel screamed and threw the roses down. “How dare you! Those aren’t the right flowers!”

“Yes they are.” Wolf was no longer hiding the growling threat in his voice. He picked up the bouquet and shook the roses free of their wrapping, snapping the stems before he shoved them again at Angel. A moan went up from the crowd; the only insult worse than a dead rose was a broken one.

“I won’t take them!” Angel shrieked.

“They are the only thing you will ever get from me.” Wolf openly snarled at her and Angel started backwards. He started dropping the roses one by one at her feet to punctuate his words. “You will no longer harass Virginia. You will not take your temper out on my sister. You will stop lying about your fantasy relationship with me.”

Angel drew herself up. “You’re fired! You’re blackballed! The Board will hear about this insulting behavior!”

Wolf only nodded. “Yes, the Board. They want to talk to you about insults. I think it’s because of the hostile workplace complaint that I filed with them today.”

“Oh, riiiiiiight! As if you’d-”

“I helped him fill it out,” Little Red spoke up, gesturing to the other storytellers who clustered around her. “We all testified that we’ve seen you constantly sexually harassing Wolf and dumping on Virginia.”

“And I’ve told them how you made me fire a promising worker as revenge for not being able to seduce him,” Roz added, putting a reassuring arm around Littlebit.

“We wenches witnessed it and I faxed a copy to everyone in the Board several hours ago,” Maggie chimed in. “I expect they’ve all had a chance to read it by now. And if you press this any further, I’m going to have the entire International Wenches Guild blackball this faire.”

“Plus the International Brotherhood of Rogues, Cads, and Scoundrels!” Ralph added.

“Telling everyone I slept with you last night isn’t just a lie, it’s defamation of my character. I have taste in women.” Wolf threw the rest of the roses down as Angel stared at him in shock, her jaw slack. “This ends right now.” He turned his back on Angel, turning on his heel with military precision.

Angel had few friends, but only Larry was tactless enough to laugh out loud and applaud. “Hey, man, maybe we can get along after all.”

“I don’t think so,” Wolf said coldly. “You’re too stupid to know the difference between a common trollop and a woman of great courage and virtue. That’s why you got stuck with Angel and I get to spend my life with my wonderful Virginia.” He sneered at Larry as he passed. “There’s no question who has the better mate.”

Wolf stopped in front of Virginia, who nervously smoothed her skirts. Now what? She was glad the prop swords were safely packed away; it was clear that both Larry and Angel would gladly run her through.

Wolf dropped to one knee and pulled a single, perfect, blood-red rose out of his pocket, offering it to her as though it were a precious jewel. “Virginia Lewis, my one and only true love, will you marry me on the last day of the faire?”

Virginia was terribly aware of everyone’s eyes on her. Well, of course I’ll marry you, I’m pregnant! she almost blurted, before she realized how dismissive it would sound.

Wolf held the rose out steadily, but she could see the faintest hint of worry in his eyes. How often had he proposed to her during their travels? How often had she changed the subject, or blown him off, or insisted that she’d never marry? With a sudden flash of insight, Virginia realized that for all his proposing, for all their planning, she’d never actually said...

“Yes.” She reached for the rose but never had a chance to touch it. Wolf launched himself at her enthusiastically, covering her face in kisses as the crowd cheered. Angel is going to kill both of us, Virginia thought, followed by Live in the moment. Enjoy this now. She leaned into Wolf, meeting him kiss for joyous kiss.

Virginia blinked lazily in the light coming through the window. She had a dim memory of Wolf telling her to go back to sleep, advice she had taken. From the muted sounds of clattering below her, the unofficial breakfast service had begun. Already the pungent smell of coffee was filling the room and her stomach gurgled. Out of habit, she slapped a hand over her nose to block the smell, but underneath the coffee was something... she couldn’t quite place it, but it was smoky and tantalizing, and suddenly she was very, very hungry!

She followed her nose down the back stairs to the little table outside where Wolf and Littlebit ate after everyone else was fed. The morning rush must almost be over, because even though she could hear the wolves in the kitchen there was already a platter here, covered with a napkin.

Whatever was drawing her was under that cloth. Virginia crept closer even while she wondered when her morning sickness would kick in and send her fleeing for the bushes. But now she was as curious as she was hungry-what was that hiding under there?

Bacon. Of course it would be bacon! Littlebit was as crazy about it as Wolf was. Virginia was going to drop the cloth and walk away, but suddenly her mouth was watering so hard that she had to swallow. Surely they wouldn’t notice if she took one little piece!

You’re going to regret this the minute you take a bite, Virginia thought sourly as she teased a little piece out from under the pile. But oh, after all these weeks of semi-frozen chicken and yogurt, it tasted so good! Just one bite wouldn’t make her sick, would it? Not two little bites... not three tiny little bites of that crisp, luscious, lovely-oh, my God, I sound like him!

The first piece didn’t trigger her morning sickness. Neither did the second, or the third, or the slice of bread at the bottom of the plate soaking up the grease...

Wolf and Littlebit surprised her as she was taking a tenth piece. Virginia cringed-who better than her knew how dangerous it was to get between Wolf and his breakfast?-but both wolves looked more stunned than angry.

“Virginia?” Wolf asked cautiously.

“Sorry,” she muttered guiltily through a full mouth. “It just smelled... I thought I’d try... I’m not trying to take your food, really.”

Wolf promptly pushed the platter towards her. “Take whatever you want. I’m just worried that you’ll make yourself sick.”

“I feel okay,” Virginia said dubiously. “Maybe I’m not sensitive to food anymore.”

Littlebit cocked her head to one side. “I wonder...” Before anyone could ask her what she was thinking, the wolf woman went back into the kitchen, returning a moment later with one of Virginia’s frozen yogurts. “Want this as a chaser?”

Virginia reached for it, but at the first bite her supposedly cured stomach roiled. With a confused whine she threw it away before it made her throw up.

“Hmmmm,” was Littlebit’s only reaction.

“What?” Wolf asked rather angrily. “What are you doing to my mate?” he shouted as Littlebit disappeared back into the kitchen.

“I’m not doing anything, I’m testing a theory,” Littlebit said, reappearing a moment later with a glass of milk in each hand. She held out one, so cold that beads of condensation were running down the glass. Just as with the yogurt, Virginia recoiled at the taste. But when Littlebit held out the other glass, the thick, earthy scent of warm milk made her mouth water again, and Virginia snatched it out of her hand.

“I’m eating like a pig!” Virginia wailed as soon as she’d frantically drained the glass. “What’s going on?”

“You’re eating like a wolf,” Littlebit corrected. “Wolf may not know this, but it’s something that the women of our village talked about-complained about-when they were alone and discussing pregnancies. There were a lot of mixed couples in our town. They said wolf women carrying a human’s child would suddenly crave vegetables-”

“Spinach,” Wolf interrupted suddenly. “When Mama was halfway through her pregnancy with you, Littlebit, she suddenly started craving spinach. Every meal she’d demand that Papa get her some-and even while she ate it she threatened to give him such a bite for making her want it.” A nostalgic smile flickered across his face.

Littlebit raised her eyebrows, but as his younger sibling she had no stories to tell on him in return, so she just went on with her story. “Human women would start eating like wolves-more and more meat, rarer every month. I wonder if you’ve been so sick because your human digestion has been fighting with your cub’s wolfy cravings?”

“So now I’m going to eat like him?”

Wolf caught the note in her voice and frowned. “Is there a problem with that?”

She blurted the truth before she caught herself. “Angel said you wouldn’t love me when I got fat.”

It was amazing how much disdain Wolf could pack into a single snort. “Angel doesn’t know anything about love.” He sat next to her, putting a comforting arm over her shoulders. “I don’t care what you look like... okay, I do, but not like that. I don’t love you with just my eyes.” He leaned forward, and for a moment Virginia thought he’d take some of the rapidly disappearing bacon, but instead he took a long sniff of her. “I adore you with my nose and my heart and my mind. It doesn’t matter how big you are or how old you are. What matters is how strong and brave and smart and kind you are.” With a loving smile, he picked up the last piece of bacon, only to hand-feed it to her.

With a last leaning nudge, Wolf picked up the platter to refill it, and Virginia shocked herself by stealing the last piece of bread on it. Wolf only laughed and ruffled her hair.

“I am sorry I’ve eaten your breakfast,” she told Littlebit, who didn’t look particularly upset.

The wolf woman shrugged. “There’s more bacon. I can smell him frying it already.”

So could Virginia, to her surprise. “I can’t believe he let me take it ALL, either!”

Littlebit only laughed. “I’ll tell you a secret,” she said, leaning forward. “A pregnant woman in the pack can do anything and it’s okay. Wolf will let you take the food right out of his mouth.” She winked at Virginia. “Take advantage of that. If there’s any pig around here, it’s my bottomless pit of a brother!”

Virginia thought of Wednesdays as “Doctor Day” now. Each day of the week had been renamed; the faire had been running so long now that “Sunday, Monday, Tuesday” were a distant memory. Now it was “Rennfaire, costume cleanup and repair, return to New York and get food for Chrissy, doctor day, advance cooking for Chrissy’s Catering, return to the faire, Rennfaire, repeat.”

Sometimes Littlebit came with them back to the city, but more often she didn’t, preferring to stay in the familiar-seeming woods rather than deal with the noise, dirt, and confusing machines of New York. This time she had stayed behind with Maggie and the wenches, all busily at work making Virginia a trousseau as a wedding present.

It was just as well not to have to deal with a third wheel, Virginia sourly thought. Their early morning meeting with Dr. Horovitz had been a wretched failure. The good doctor had decided to look for the source of Wolf’s neurosis by discussing his early childhood. Poor Wolf tried to answer her questions but he couldn’t tell the whole truth and, just as in Little Lamb Village, his every clumsy attempt to lie or evade only dug him in deeper. At the end of the hour Wolf was miserable and Dr. Horovitz was making snippy comments that “perhaps they would be happier with another therapist.”

That was upsetting enough, but as they left the office, Wolf’s head snapped around and he sniffed the air, scowling. Without a word he tried to hustle Virginia out of the building. At first she’d tried to resist-until she heard her grandmother’s quavering, imperious voice arguing drunkenly with the doorman. Grandmother? What was she doing here?

Oh. Right. She lived here.

Virginia had never gone back, never even tried to contact her grandmother since their big fight. The resulting rush of emotions at that voice made her want to turn around and run right back to Dr. Horovitz, but instead she let Wolf pull her into the street.

“Part of me misses her,” she confessed to Wolf out on the corner.

“What does the other part feel?”

Virginia clenched her hands protectively over the little bulge of her stomach. She knew what Grandmother would think of their “bohemian” life at the fair, but for the first time in her life, she was thoroughly enjoying herself. Virginia hustled across the street the moment the light changed and let her thin-lipped silence speak for itself. Wolf didn’t bring up the subject again.

Reaching Dr. Fraiser’s office was like reaching heaven. It was light and airy, as opposed to Dr. Horovitz’s den of leather and wood, and the receptionist smiled at them. So did Dr. Fraiser herself, walking behind the counter with an open folder of records in her hands.

“What, no books? You’ve read everything already?” she teased Wolf, who ducked and blushed. For the last several visits he’d come armed with his usual armful of advice books-Dr. Spock, Modern Parenting, What to Expect When You’re Expecting, and everything else he could find from the public library-and had peppered Dr. Fraiser with questions at the end of each session. Virginia had been embarrassed at how much time he took out of the doctor’s busy schedule, but Dr. Fraiser seemed to enjoy it. Now that she had decided that Wolf wasn’t a wifebeater, she found his open enthusiasm charming.

“Here.” Dr Fraiser rummaged at the reception desk for a moment, then dug in a drawer, finally handing a stack of pamphlets and brochures. “This will keep you busy while I’m visiting with Virginia.”

“Seven Warning Signs of SIDS?” Virginia muttered as she followed the tiny doctor down the hall. “Thanks for making him paranoid.”

“Was that in there? Oh, I suppose it was. I just grabbed a copy of everything we have to keep him quiet.”

It was an uneventful examination. Virginia told about the changes in her morning sickness, leaving out Littlebit’s explanation. Dr. Fraiser simply shrugged; as far as she was concerned, cravings were cravings no matter how weird. She just told Virginia to be sure to take a multivitamin with folic acid.

Wolf was indeed quiet when they got out-quiet and white as a sheet. Dr. Fraiser stepped forward to take his pulse, but he shook her off. “Tell me more about this, please,” he asked in a strangled voice, thrusting a trifold at her.

Virginia craned to see the title. “Extra Fingers and Tiny Tails.”

“I really did give you everything, didn’t I?” Dr. Fraiser mused. “This is just something we give to people if their baby has a minor birth defect. It’s not that uncommon for babies to have a sixth finger or even a little tail.”

“You’re used to that?”

Dr. Fraiser shrugged. “In a small rural practice it might be unusual, but not with the number of births in this city. I’ve had three extra fingers, four extra toes, and a tail this year alone, and that’s nowhere near my record.”

Wolf stared at her intently. “What do you do when that happens?”

“Are you worried about it? Really, it’s quite normal, doesn’t mean there’s anything abnormal with the baby or the mother has done anything wrong.” She craned upwards to pat Wolf reassuringly on the shoulder. “We just wait a few days until the baby’s strong enough, and it’s all over with a quick snip. Barely a scar, even. Any hospital with a decent neo-natal unit can do it.” She turned to Virginia, missing the expression on Wolf’s face. “Shall we say two weeks? Good. See you then.”

He waited until they were back on the street to explode. “You’re having that baby in the Fourth Kingdom!”

“With no medical care and evil fairy godmothers just waiting to curse it? I don’t think so!”

“Did you hear that woman? They don’t even care here! They just want any excuse to cut babies up! It’s barbaric! It’s not just the tail! Look at this!” He shoved another brochure into her hands.

“The Case for Circumcision,” Virginia read out loud. “Yeah, what about it?”

“What about it? What about it? Read it! Do you know what that is?”

“Of course I know what it is, I just don’t know what your big deal is.”

“You would if you had one and they were trying to chop parts of it off,” Wolf muttered darkly.

“Look, you can tell them not to. We’ll tell them it’s against your beliefs to have any surgery done, there are religions like that. They won’t circumcise if we say no, and we can take the baby before they take the tail. Just make an appointment and don’t show up if they insist.”

“I don’t even want to take the chance!”

“Well I don’t want to take the chance that something awful will happen to me in your freaky world where doctors have wings and curses get handed out like dinner mints! How many stories start with the mother dying in childbirth?”

“Ummm... Not all of them...”

They could fight about it all day-certainly Wolf looked ready to fight about it right up to the moment she went into labor. She wasn’t even sure why they were fighting-she didn’t care if the baby had a tail or what happened with… other appendages. “Look, I just don’t want to give birth somewhere weird, okay? Why are we even talking about this? Nobody’s going to be able to even do anything to it until it’s born, and that’s months from now. Let’s find other stuff to fight about now, okay?”

Wolf cocked his head, staring at her speculatively for a long moment until a small smile finally crooked the corner of his mouth. “Okay.” But as they finally reached the penthouse she heard him mutter, “I’ll just discuss it with Tony.”