Chapter Twenty-Two Lou handed Jimmy a plate. It had been almost two weeks since he last saw Abby and Lou’s heart ached for him. He wanted to be with her and Claudia, but he didn’t know how. She wished she was better friends with Abby, but it just wasn’t her place to tell her about Jimmy, not yet anyway. However, she was trying to rectify that matter. And if that meant using her daughter’s friendship with Claudia, then so be it. She turned from the table when she heard a knock at the back door. “I’ll get it.” Lou opened the door and stood open-mouthed for a few seconds. She couldn’t believe who was standing before her. “Cody!” Lou exclaimed, flinging her arms around him. She dragged her old friend into the house. “Look who’s here!” Kid jumped up from his seat and hugged his old friend, as did the children. Jimmy rose to his feet and stood, awkwardly shifting his weight from one foot to the other. “Cody,” Jimmy began. He hadn’t seen his friend since Cody fired him from his show. Cody grabbed Jimmy in a big bear hug. “You’re alive.” ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ It was several hours later, the McCloud children were in bed. Kid and Lou had retired as well. Jimmy sat with Cody on the porch. The two men had aired out their differences. Jimmy understood that Cody was starting up a business. He couldn’t act as Jimmy’s friend and boss. And Cody understood as well. Jimmy had expected more from him. He wished he could have given it. Jimmy needed it, but at the time he couldn’t see it. It took the loss of his son to make him see how much family meant. “I figured it would be good for Rock Creek,” Cody said, leaning back on the wicker sofa that graced the McCloud’s porch. He had just been telling Jimmy about his plan to organize another buffalo hunt in the area, similar to the one he had organized for the Czar Alexander six years ago. “Not to mention you,” Jimmy added, but he was smiling. It hadn’t taken long for he and Cody to slip back into their normal banter. Cody shrugged. Jimmy laughed. “It’s good to have you around, Cody.” Cody was who he was, never pretended otherwise and Jimmy had missed that. He never realized how much until tonight. “I was meaning to ask you, you think you’d like to give show business another crack?” Cody asked. Jimmy shook his head. The bright lights, the big city, it wasn’t for him. He belonged out here, in the real wild west. And he told Cody as much. Cody nodded. “It would have made a hell of a show. The return of Wild Bill Hickok.” “Wild Bill is dead.” Jimmy raised a glass. “May he rest in peace.” Cody clinked his glass with Jimmy’s. “That fella, O’Day, he didn’t have any idea what it meant to be you, did he?” “No,” Jimmy said slowly. “He probably thought it would be like your show.” Cody laughed sadly. Jimmy’s life was nothing like his show or the ten-cent novels. “But I got a favor to ask you,” Jimmy continued. Cody looked at him, expectantly. “You think you could find a buyer for Wild Bill’s guns?” Jimmy asked. “You gonna part with those colts of yours’?” Cody asked, incredulous. “I wanna buy a house,” Jimmy told him quietly. “A house?” Cody exclaimed. “You planning on settling down here, in Rock Creek?” “I don’t know,” Jimmy admitted. “Then what do you need a house for?” “It’s for someone else.” “You buying a house?” Cody half-shouted. “And it ain’t even for you?” “It’s for Abby,” Jimmy answered. Cody adjusted the pillow behind him, making himself even more comfortable on the sofa, but not before re-filling both of their glasses. “Abby, huh.” And then he sat, quietly listening. When Jimmy was finally finished speaking, Cody nodded. “I think I can find a buyer,” he said. Chapter Twenty - Three Cook waved her trusty frying pan at a bellboy who had dared dip his finger in the cake she had just finished frosting. “Out with you,” she shouted. The boy darted backwards, deftly moving away from Cook, somehow managing to avoid crashing into a counter, table or even a chair. A difficult feat in the hotel kitchen. “And you too,” she yelled at Jimmy. Jimmy moved out of the running boy’s way. Then he stared at Cook. She wasn’t exactly what one would picture a cook to be. She was small and thin. Her brown hair was pinned up and threaded with gray and she was beautiful. Her features were small and even and her eyes a luminous shade of green. No wonder MacCallister made a pass at her, Jimmy thought. “I said get out,” Cook bellowed. “You got ears, boy. Now use ‘em!” “You’re Cook, right?” Jimmy asked, unfazed by the frying pan aimed at his head. “And you’re in room number 203?” Cook demanded, still waving the pan. “No.” “201?” “Nope.” “Then what the devil are you doing in my kitchen?” Cook shouted. “I gotta favor to ask you,” Jimmy said. “And why would I do you any favors?” Cook was fairly snarling. And Jimmy couldn’t help but smile. He liked this bellicose woman. “You’re friends with Abby, right?” “Right,” Cook said, almost reluctantly. Then her eyes grew wide. “You’re her Mister Hickok, aren’t you?” If Jimmy blushed, he would have blushed at those words. “I’m James Hickok,” he grudgingly admitted. “Jimmy to most folk.” “Well Jimmy, when the hell are you gonna take that woman to bed?” Cook declared. And this time Jimmy did blush. What had Abby been telling that woman? “All she used to do was talk about you, then you broke her heart but starting two weeks ago, she starting bringing your name into every conversation,” Cook told him. “Her arm is much better.” She paused. “Thought you’d wanna know.” “I do,” Jimmy whispered. Cook studied his face. Whenever Abby spoke about Jimmy, her eyes fairly glowed, even now when Cook knew she wasn’t seeing him on a regular basis. “So you gonna tell me what happened between the two of you?” And before Jimmy knew it, he found himself telling Cook everything. He told her about his feelings for Abby, how he had pushed her away and how he loved her but wasn’t sure what he should do about it. Cook’s face softened as she listened to Jimmy’s tale. Poor child was in love, maybe for the very first time and he had no idea what that meant. Didn’t he understand, love made fools of them all? “So what was that favor you came here to ask me about?” “I want you to give Abby some money,” Jimmy said. “I don’t got any money,” Cook retorted. “If I did, I would have given Abby some a long time ago.” “But I do,” Jimmy interjected. “So give it to her yourself,” Cook snapped. Then she grinned. “You know that girl pretty well, don’t you?” Jimmy gave her a wan smile. He knew that girl and he knew she wouldn’t take money from him. Too many strings apparently. But he was sure she’d take it from Cook. Cook grabbed him and kissed him soundly on the mouth. “You’re a good boy.” And she was going to make damn sure Abby knew that. Chapter Twenty – Four “Mister Hickok,” Claudia shouted when she spied Jimmy walking down the street outside the marshal’s office. “Mister Hickok.” She began to run then, her footsteps crunching loudly on the snow that had just fallen last night. She jumped into Jimmy’s open arms. “How’s my best girl?” Jimmy asked. “Good,” Claudia said quickly. “You coming to my spelling bee tomorrow? It’s at the school at two o’clock. All the kid’s folks are coming.” “Claudia,” Abby said sharply, her cheeks coloring as she finally caught up to Claudia and overheard the last comment. She knew her daughter adored Jimmy but now she was placing unfair burdens upon him. “I’d love to,” Jimmy said quickly. “And how did you do on your math test?” Abby stared at him, open-mouthed. She knew Claudia visited him in the marshal’s office after school. She had picked up a few more hours at the hotel and between that and the money Cook had given her last month, she didn’t have to sell the house. But she hadn’t realized how big a part of Claudia’s life Jimmy had become. “Only missed three,” Claudia announced. “And you promised.” Jimmy laughed as he set Claudia on the ground. “I know.” He glanced at Abby, who was looking rather dazed. “I told Claudia I’d buy her some candy if she did better than last time,” Jimmy said. And Abby stumbled. Jimmy grabbed her by the arm quickly righting her. Then he touched the elbow he knew had been dislocated. “Does it hurt any more?” Abby shook her head. “No.” She briefly considered making a quip about Jimmy becoming a doctor but she was having trouble saying anything. Jimmy took one of Claudia’s hands and Abby took the other, and together they walked toward the general store. Claudia took the opportunity to lift her legs off the ground and swing from time to time. When they finally reached the store, Jimmy handed Claudia a few coins and the girl raced inside. “Hickok,” Hal Logan, the saloon owner shouted from the doorway of his establishment. “Got a big game going if you’re interested.” Jimmy shook his head. “No money,” he yelled back. “No money!” Hal exclaimed. “Heard tell you sold those colts of yours and now you ain’t got no money. You sure didn’t lose it here.” Hal’s voice took on a betrayed quality as if he was disappointed that Jimmy hadn’t lost the money in his saloon. Jimmy just laughed as Hal ducked back into the saloon. “You sold your guns?” Abby said, glancing at his holsters. They did look different, far plainer that the other ones. “Yeah,” Jimmy replied glumly. “Why?” Abby knew how fond he was of those weapons. She had seen him cleaning them often enough. It was, in fact, the only thing he ever cleaned. Jimmy shrugged his shoulders. “You needed the money?” Abby persisted. “Yeah,” Jimmy answered. “So did you have a nice Christmas?” he asked quickly, obviously changing the subject. “Yeah,” Abby said. She wrapped her arms around herself for warmth, although for January the weather wasn’t half bad. “Was your visit with your friend good?” “It was alright,” Jimmy replied. He had spent Christmas with the Codys and had just returned to Rock Creek a few weeks ago. “Did Santa bring you everything you wanted?” Jimmy grinned at her. “Yes.” Abby laughed. “This year, Cook played Santa. She came into some money and she gave me some as a present.” She put a gloved hand on Jimmy’s arm. “I don’t have to sell the house. Seems as if Cook’s brother was rich and he left her everything. And she insisted on giving me some money because she thinks if she dies, her no-good cousin will get it and she doesn’t want him to see one red cent.” Jimmy grinned. Cook. Good ol’ Cook. Who knew that woman had such a wild imagination? “I’m glad,” Jimmy told her, covering her hand with his own. And he was. Seeing Abby’s smile, the relief in it, well it was his Christmas present to himself. “You don’t have to go to the spelling bee,” Abby said only dimly aware that Jimmy had laced his fingers with hers. “I wanna,” Jimmy smiled. “Claudia promised me that you’d make me a pie if she won.” Abby laughed. “Claudia is probably the littlest one in that bee, but she thinks she’s gonna win it all.” “Nothing wrong in being confident.” Abby smiled back at him. She heard the affection in his voice and was glad Claudia had a male influence in her life. “Abby,” a man’s voice called out. The man began whistling a tune Jimmy couldn’t quite name as he walked toward them. Abby turned in the direction of the voice. “Carl.” Jimmy dropped her hand so quickly one might have thought he’d been burned. When Carl came to stand beside Abby, she introduced him. “Jimmy, this is Carl Boatwright. He has a ranch just west of Rock Creek. Carl, this is James Hickok.” Carl stuck out his hand. “Pleased to meet you,” he said, shaking Jimmy’s hand vigorously. Jimmy studied the man. He was average height and weight. He had medium brown hair and medium brown eyes. In fact, Jimmy found it hard to find anything particularly distinguishable about the man. “We still on for supper tomorrow?” Carl asked Abby. “Of course we are,” Abby answered. Carl kissed the back of Abby’s hand. “Good. I’ll see you then. Nice to meet you Mister Hickok.” “Nice to meet you,” Jimmy replied automatically. Abby turned to Jimmy when Carl hurried away. “Carl and I, well...” “I can see,” Jimmy snapped. “He’s courting you.” “Courting?” Abby gasped. He made her sound like a child. “We are seeing one another, yes,” she said stiffly. She didn’t like his tone. “Well congratulations,” Jimmy said. “If you’ll excuse me, I have some work to tend to.” “Jimmy,” Abby called out. Even though he was congratulating her, she heard the bitterness in his voice. “Wait. Did I do something wrong?” Jimmy stopped. “No. I just lost track of time,” he said less angrily and even Abby could see that the brightness that had filled his eyes earlier was gone. “ Tell Claudia I’ll see her tomorrow.” “I will,” Abby said softly. And for some reason she felt like crying. Chapter Twenty – Five That night, after dinner, Jimmy stood by the sink drying the dishes Lou handed him. He was utterly exhausted after spending the afternoon on the range with Kid. Who knew cattle were so stupid? In fact the more time he spent with them, the more Jimmy hated the animals. “So you gonna tell me what’s a-matter?” Lou said, breaking Jimmy’s reverie. “Don’t think I’m cut out for ranching,” Jimmy admitted. “It is hard picturing you as a cattle baron,” Lou smiled. When Jimmy shook his head ruefully, she added, “you know his door is always open.” “I know,” Jimmy said glumly. He knew this day would come some day and right now he was looked forward to it. He had to swallow his pride and go to Teaspoon. He knew it, Lou and Kid knew it. Hell even Teaspoon knew it. He was a lawman through and through. “Is that all?” Lou asked carefully. She had met Cook last week and that woman had given her an earful about what she called Abby’s latest venture into stupidity. Cook was planning on talking to Abby tonight, so Lou decided to broach the subject with Jimmy. “Abby’s seeing someone,” Jimmy said finally. “I know,” Lou told him softly. “Carl Boatwright. You met him?” “Yeah.” “He moved here a few weeks ago. He bought the old Bailey place, just south of here. His wife died a few years back and he just getting over her now,” Lou said. “From what I hear, he’s a decent man.” “I figured he would be,” Jimmy replied. Abby had found the perfect man, he owned his own place, had steady work, he could probably cook and clean better than Abby did. And Jimmy was sure that he loved animals and small children to boot. Yes, that was exactly the kind of man Abby was looking for. “You wanna know what Cook says about him?” Lou asked. Jimmy looked at her with interest. Cook never minced words. “He’s broccoli,” Lou announced. “He’s what?” “Broccoli,” Lou repeated. “You know, good for you, but no one really wants it.” “Some people love broccoli,” Jimmy retorted. Abby probably loved broccoli. Lou handed Jimmy the last dish. “And some people love chocolate.” ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ Meanwhile in Abby’s home, a very similar scene was occurring. Claudia was in the parlor, pouring over words she was certain would appear in the spelling bee tomorrow, while Abby and Cook were in the kitchen, washing dishes. “I wish you’d just move in here with me,” Abby said. Cook snorted. “I like living alone.” “But -” Abby protested. “If you bring up that money again, I’m going to scream,” Cook declared. “I gave you that money because I wanted to. You deserve it more than my sister does.” “I thought it was your cousin who didn’t deserve it,” Abby said softly. And when Cook looked away, Abby was certain that she was avoiding the subject. “So tell me about your new beau,” Cook said brightly, trying her level best to distract Abby from her miscue. Sorry, Jimmy, she thought. “Carl. We’re getting along fine.” “Fine, eh? Have you taken him into your bed?” “Cook,” Abby sighed. “Must your mind always be in the gutter?” “I’m an old woman,” Cook said with a dismissive wave of her hand. “I can’t even remember the gutter.” Abby shook her head. Cook was beautiful and she knew it. She could have her choice of any number of men, but she didn’t want them. She truly liked living alone. And she valued her independence. “That’s a no, I take it,” Cook surmised. Abby simply handed her another dish. “Why not? Don’t his kisses turn your knees to jelly?” “Why, Cook,” Abby said sweetly. “I didn’t think you would believe in that sort of thing.” “Oh I believe,” Cook replied tartly. “I’m not a nun you know. There was this one fella...” And as Cook launched into one of her tales, Abby smiled to herself. Sometimes she envied Cook for her freedom. But then again, Cook didn’t have a child and for that Abby felt sympathy for her friend. “I had that kind of relationship with Richard,” Abby said softly, once Cook had concluded her story. “His kisses turned me to butter. But outside the bedroom,” Abby shook her head. “We weren’t anything.” Cook gave Abby a quick hug. “I know he hurt you. But now you are so scared of feeling anything about a man, that you are denying what’s in your heart.” “What are you talking about?” Abby exclaimed. “I know what I feel, I feel -” “Love?” Cook interrupted. “I haven’t known him long enough,” Abby said primly. “I care for him. Carl is a good man.” “So is that Hickok fella,” Cook retorted. “He’s too much like Richard,” Abby shot back. “He doesn’t even have a job.” “What if he had a job?” Cook asked. “He doesn’t,” Abby said firmly. “And he doesn’t want one. He likes his freedom.” Cook rolled her eyes. How she would love to tell Abby where her precious money came from, but she had made a promise. So all she could say was, “don’t judge a book by his cover.” Chapter Twenty–Six “Hurry up,” Polly scolded her husband. “The spelling bee is gonna start soon. And we have to be there.” Noah, Natalie and Mary McCloud were all in the bee and Carrie was there as well, helping. Rachel had spoken to the teacher, Miss Hughes, and Miss Hughes had agreed to let Carrie work with her. In fact, she had been quite enthusiastic, she had a large classroom and was grateful for the help. “I’m coming,” Teaspoon grumbled, reaching for his hat. “I’m coming.” Just as Polly was shooing Teaspoon out the door, Jimmy stepped in. “Ain’t you going to the bee?” Teaspoon demanded. He knew Claudia was expecting him. “Yeah,” Jimmy replied. “I just wanted to talk to you first.” Teaspoon and Polly exchanged glances. Jimmy had an odd gleam in his eyes. “I’ll meet you there, sugar lips,” Polly said, giving her husband a quick peck before she left. Teaspoon walked back to his chair and settled into it. He glanced expectantly at Jimmy who was walking back and forth. “What can I do for you, son?” Jimmy stopped his pacing. “You still willing to hire me?” Teaspoon quickly stopped his jaw from dropping. “I just ain’t cut out to be a rancher,” Jimmy explained. He went on telling the marshal how he had tried, how Kid had shown him every trick he knew. And Jimmy had listened to his friend, trying to absorb some of his knowledge. However the more Jimmy learned, the more he hated ranching. Taking care of cattle just wasn’t as satisfying as taking care of a town. His skills were made for catching criminals, not cattle. “And Cody asked if I wanted to start up another show,” Jimmy continued. “He even said I could just work behind the scenes if I wanted. But I don’t, I don’t like show biz.” “So you want me to hire you?” Teaspoon asked. When Jimmy nodded, he added firmly, “I’d be glad to, but as a deputy.” Jimmy might be on his way to being the man he once was, but he was still on the road. “I know.” Jimmy took a deep breath. “I don’t think the good folk of Rock Creek could see me as their marshal.” He looked directly at Teaspoon. “Not the way I’ve been living. Not when I’d have to follow in your shoes.” “Son, you are a legend and the good folk of Rock Creek, as you put it, know it. Some may not know you’re a living legend and some might and aren’t willing to talk about how you escaped death. But they can see, just like I can, you are a lawman. You just got to prove it to those folks who don’t believe in you that you can be one again. You proved it in Rock Creek as a deputy, in Independence, Springfield, Hays City and Abilene.” Teaspoon chuckled warmly at Jimmy’s befuddled expression. “Yeah, I kept up on your doings.” Jimmy fixed his eyes on Teaspoon. “You think... well, in a couple of years, I could be a marshal again. Here, in Rock Creek?” Teaspoon stood up. “Why do you think I’ve been holding on to this job for so long? I just been waiting for you to come back and take it.” He fished in his drawer for a while. He soon found what he was searching for and pulled out a silver star. He came to stand by Jimmy and pinned the star to his shirt. “Teaspoon,” Jimmy said, his voice shaking. It was stupid, he had been a lawman in a dozen towns, but right now wearing this silver star, being Teaspoon’s deputy again, well it meant more to him than all the stars he had ever worn in his lifetime. Teaspoon clapped Jimmy on the shoulder. “I’ve been saving it for you. Now come on, we have a spelling bee to get to.” Jimmy fell in step with Teaspoon, as they walked toward the schoolhouse. He turned to his mentor. “Teaspoon,” he began once more. “Thank you. I don’t know how -” “Then don’t,” Teaspoon cut him off. “We are family. Family does for one another. Always.” Chapter Twenty–Seven “Oh sweetie,” Abby said, hugging Claudia. “I’m so proud of you.” “But I lost,” Claudia said, her voice quavering. She had gone out in the third round of the spelling bee. “But you went the furthest of all the first graders,” Abby informed her. Claudia nodded, but Abby could see the dejection in her daughter’s eyes as she glanced at Natalie McCloud. Natalie was encircled by a crowd of relatives, receiving their congratulations on winning the bee. Abby wished she could do more to console her daughter. Carl patted Claudia on the shoulder. “You can sure spell better than I can.” And once again, Claudia’s head drooped. She was taking this far too hard. Abby pointed at Jimmy who caught her eye and was now leaving the group surrounding Natalie, and making his way toward them. “Did you see Mister Hickok clap for you?” Abby asked. Claudia nodded miserably once again. “He clapped for Natalie too,” she muttered. Abby wished Jimmy would hurry, she was certain he would know what to say to cheer Claudia up. He always did. But he was stopped by Miss Hughes who linked her arm through his. She was gazing at him with adoring eyes. Miss Hughes said something and Abby watched as Jimmy laughed. The woman had no shame, Abby thought. She knew she was being mean-spirited but really, must she carry on so, and in the classroom? Then it hit her. She saw the way Jimmy’s eyes lingered on the teacher’s generous curves, how he listened intently as she continued to speak. They must be seeing each other. Abby wondered if she should warn Miss Hughes. She knew what kind of man Jimmy was and she knew that he would break the teacher’s heart, eventually. But she realized it wasn’t her place to interfere in their relationship. Then she saw it, the silver star pinned to Jimmy’s chest and staggered backwards. “Abby,” Carl exclaimed, his face filled with concern. He caught her by the arm and held her up. Abby was grateful for his presence of mind, because otherwise she was sure she would have fallen. Jimmy was a lawman. Unexpectedly her eyes began to fill with tears. He had gone back to the law. She knew Jimmy had been a marshal in the past but when his deputy had been accidentally killed, he had quit the law and pretty much quit on life. But now he seemed to be recovering. Abby drew in a sharp breath. It was obvious now, he felt he had some kind of life or he wanted a real life, a life with Miss Hughes. Abby felt a pang from somewhere inside her. He had moved on. What did she expect? She had moved on, seeing Carl. Why shouldn’t Jimmy? Even though she knew it was logical, it still hurt. Jimmy finally broke free of Miss Hughes and picked Claudia up, spinning her around. When he finally set her down, Claudia began crying. “I lost,” Claudia sobbed. Didn’t he even pay enough attention to her to know that? “Lost?” Jimmy said, his voice puzzled. “You were the last first grader up there and you even outlasted some of the second graders.” “But Natalie won,” Claudia wailed. “Wanna hear a secret?” Jimmy asked the girl. Claudia nodded. “When Natalie was six, she didn’t even last as long as you did,” Jimmy said seriously. Claudia wiped her eyes. “Really?” “Just imagine how good you’ll be next year.” “You think I’ll win?” “I don’t know, but you just might give the big kids a run for their money.” Jimmy leaned over and whispered to Claudia. “It would be pretty funny to see some of those big boys scared of you, now wouldn’t it?” Claudia giggled, picturing the spectacle. “The marshal is handing out licorice,” Jimmy said, straightening up. “For me too?” Jimmy gave Claudia a small push in Teaspoon’s direction. “Of course for you too. Now go on.” When Claudia scampered away, Jimmy turned to Abby. “She sure took it hard, didn’t she?” But Abby wasn’t paying attention to his words. She was too busy watching her daughter, smiling again. Then she reached a hand up and touched the badge. “You’re a marshal again,” she whispered. “Nah,” Jimmy rubbed the back of his neck. “Just a deputy,” he laughed ruefully. “Can you imagine that?” Abby pressed her hand flat against Jimmy’s chest. “I’m so proud of you.” Jimmy gave her a quizzical look. Abby looked so distraught. “Something wrong?” Abby shook her head, quickly removing her hand. She understood now. Jimmy was changing. And unlike her late husband, he was changing for a woman. It’s just that woman wasn’t her, it was Miss Hughes. And why shouldn’t it be? Miss Hughes was young, pretty and possessed a sweet temper. And right this minute, Abby would have cheerfully clobbered her. “I think she was just worried about Claudia,” Carl said smoothly. But Jimmy noted that Carl was looking at Abby oddly too. Abby turned away, as her vision grew cloudy once more. “We’re all heading to the restaurant,” Jimmy said. “Will you all come too?” Abby wanted to protest, but her throat was filling with unshed tears, so she couldn’t voice her objection. “We’d love to,” Carl said. “Claudia needs to see that it doesn’t really matter who wins and who loses. It matters how hard you try.” Jimmy grinned at the man and squeezed Abby’s shoulder. “Good. I’ll see you both there.” Chapter Twenty–Eight “I’m gonna go out and get a breath of fresh air,” Abby told Carl who was picking up her half-eaten dinner plate. “Don’t you feel well?” Carl asked. Abby pressed her hand to her forehead. “Just a little headache.” “You want me to take you home?” Abby flashed him a brief smile. “I’ll be fine.” She gestured to Claudia who was chattering happily to Mary McCloud. “Look at her, she is having such a good time. I don’t want to drag her away so soon.” Carl nodded. “Don’t stay out too long, it’s freezing out there.” “I won’t,” Abby replied, touched by Carl’s concern. He was a good man, she reminded herself. Abby stepped outside and wrapped her arms around herself, wishing she had brought along her coat. “Something wrong?” Jimmy asked, coming to stand beside her. He looked at her, shivering, and removed his jacket, placing it over Abby’s shoulders. “I have a bit of a headache,” Abby replied softly, gratefully slipping her arms through the sleeves and jamming her hands in the pockets. “Thank you,” she said, enjoying the warmth of his jacket. “You sure?” Jimmy said. “You were acting kinda funny at the bee.” “Just disappointed for Claudia’s sake, I guess.” Abby knew she was lying through her teeth, but she wasn’t willing to tell Jimmy the real reason for her behavior. How embarrassing would that be? Her fingers found a slip of paper inside the pocket. “Here,” she said, pulling out the paper. “I don’t want you to lose this.” As she removed the paper from the pocket she saw it was a receipt for five-hundred dollars. “Abby,” Jimmy began, blowing on his cold hands. Abby turned to him as the pieces one by one starting falling into place. “What happened to your guns?” Jimmy touched the handles of his new revolvers. “Got new ones,” he said quietly. “I know you sold them. But why?” Abby frowned. “You seemed pretty fond of your old ones.” “Just did,” Jimmy said quickly, longing to change the subject. “Carl seems nice,” he added. “So does Miss Hughes,” Abby snapped, instantly regretting the words as soon as they left her mouth. “Miss Hughes?” Jimmy’s voice rose and Abby heard the laughter in his words. Abby looked down, feeling rather embarrassed. “Nothing.” She scuffed the toe of her boot against the ground. Then she looked at Jimmy’s guns once more. She didn’t think she had seen his old ones since before Christmas. In fact she was sure of it. “This is the receipt for your guns, isn’t it?!” she shouted as the realization struck her. Those guns were worth a lot of money. Cook gave her a lot of money, five-hundred dollars in fact. Cook didn’t have any money until that long lost brother of hers suddenly appeared. “They were my guns,” Jimmy retorted. “I guess I could do anything I wanted with them.” “And you gave the money to Cook,” Abby continued, her anger growing. Cook was always a terrible liar. “How could I have been so stupid?!” Abby whirled around, prepared to leave and Jimmy grabbed her, making sure she wouldn’t just storm away. “Listen -” “To what?” Abby shouted. “Why? Did you think I’d be grateful? You already know about my whore-like behavior with MacCallister, so why not with you?” She pushed in vain at Jimmy in an effort to free herself. But to no avail. “If I wanted your gratitude,” Jimmy spat out the word. “I would have given the money to you directly.” “You tried, remember? I just wouldn’t take it.” “Then I would have had the marshal or had Lou give it to you,” Jimmy retorted. “I wouldn’t have taken it from them either,” Abby sniffed disdainfully. “Ah, but you would have been grateful I tried,” Jimmy snapped. “Wouldn’t you?” “Let go of me!” Abby cried. “I gave it to Cook because I knew you’d take it from her and if it came from her, you wouldn’t suspect me,” Jimmy said, his voice soft now. “I knew how much you needed it and I wanted you to have it.” “Because I’m so pathetic, right?” Abby yelled. “Because I love you,” Jimmy shouted. “And I want you to have what you want.” He never wanted this to happen, not like this anyway. He would have been thrilled if Abby never knew where the money came from. If and when Abby came to him, he wanted it to be for the right reasons. “You love me?” Abby shouted. “You love Miss Hughes!” “Miss Hughes?” Jimmy furrowed his brow. “I barely even know the woman.” “But you’re a deputy because of her,” Abby cried, becoming more and more aware of how crazy she sounded. Jimmy was right, she never saw him talk to the teacher before today. And she knew how flirtatious the teacher was. “I’m a deputy because of you and Claudia,” Jimmy replied. “And me. The law is what I do best.” He gave Abby a small smile. “I want Claudia to be proud when she talks about what her pa does.” And her ma, Jimmy thought. “Jimmy,” Abby whispered, acutely aware of his arms which were now wrapped around her. She could scarcely believe what she was hearing. He loved them? Abby felt rather boneless at those words and she was certain she would dissolve into a helpless heap upon the floor if he let go. He loved them! “I love you,” Jimmy said once more. “And I’m sorry for hurting you the way I did after that trip to Hastings.” “Don’t.” “But when I was there, I ran into the wife of the man who died in Deadwood,” Jimmy continued as if she hadn’t said anything. She had to know, she had to know everything, then she could decide. He couldn’t erase the past but he could try to explain it. “Please,” Abby beseeched him. She didn’t want to hear anymore. He had hurt her so badly that night, she didn’t want to remember any of it. “She said it was all my fault that her husband was dead. She told me I was like poison to the people I loved and I believed her. But I know now that people make their own decisions. People are gonna get hurt, no matter what I do. All I can do now is help the ones I can and not hurt the rest on purpose,” Jimmy concluded. “Abby,” Carl said, opening the door. Jimmy and Abby jumped apart. Jimmy kept his eyes firmly glued to Abby who was staring at the floor. “I was wondering if Claudia was out here with you,” Carl continued, frowning at the sight of Jimmy and Abby outside, alone. “Claudia?” Abby’s head snapped upward. “She’s not inside?” “She was looking for you,” Carl answered. “She was checking for you out the window and now I can’t find her.” Chapter Twenty–Nine ½ hour before... Mary McCloud poked Claudia in the ribs. “See,” she pointed at Carrie. “Miss MacCallister is with Ethan, he’s the doctor’s son, and Small Knife.” she said, her eyes settling on a lanky young man with light brown hair and smiling blue eyes. She then nodded at the dark young man. “Miss MacCallister is sweet on Small Knife.” Claudia looked at the man Mary referring to. He was handsome with dark skin, long hair and strong features, but not as handsome as Mr. Hickok. “Small Knife is here because he thinks he needs some experience to get into medical school,” Marry added conspiratorially. “So he’s working with Doc Mathews. And Ethan is working with his pa too. Him and Small Knife wanna go to school together.” Mary tugged on Claudia’s hand. “C’mon, let’s go listen to what they are saying. Miss MacCallister is getting all red.” The two girls moved to the small group, Small Knife, Ethan and Carrie. “Diana is very nice,” Carrie said stubbornly. Ethan laughed. “Notice how girls always say that when they are talking about someone ugly?” Small Knife grinned. “Diana is not ugly,” Carrie half-shouted. “And come to think of it, she isn’t perfect for you because you are a jackass!” Ethan howled with laughter. “If she was perfect for me, you’d throw yourself down a well to get us together.” “I did that for my pa!” Carrie fumed. “He and Miss Rachel weren’t getting along so . . . Oh shut up. I was only eight.” Ethan opened his mouth to make some smart aleck comment when Small Knife shook his head at him. And that small movement was enough. Ethan backed away from his teasing. “Miss MacCallister threw herself down a well?” Claudia asked Mary. “That’s what I heard,” Mary replied. “Mister and Missus MacCallister were fighting a lot so she did that to bring them back together.” “And it worked?” Claudia asked, her voice filled with awe. Mary pointed to a different group. Rachel was smiling and Ryan had his hand possessively resting on her shoulder. Rachel lifted one of her own hands and placed it on top of Ryan’s. “They are always touching each other, so I guess it did work. My ma and pa are always hugging and kissing like them,” she continued, rolling her eyes in disgust. Mary looked at Claudia’s downcast eyes. “Don’t Mister Boatwright and your ma hug and kiss all the time?” “No,” Claudia said defiantly. “And I don’t want them to. She’s gonna marry Mister Hickok.” Mary studied her friend. “I don’t think Uncle Jimmy is gonna marry anyone.” And Claudia looked even more dejected. Mary knew Mr. Hickok far better than she did. “Claudia,” Carl called out. “Gotta go,” Claudia told her friend glumly. She shuffled in Carl’s direction. “Get your coat,” Carl commanded her. “We should get going.” “Already?” Claudia protested. “Ma didn’t say.” Carl grasped her arm firmly and jerked her close. “What did I tell you about minding me? Your ma may let you run wild, but when we are married, it’s all gonna stop.” Claudia blinked back her tears. He was hurting her arm. But at least he didn’t threaten her with his switch. That switch hurt something awful. Then it dawned on her what she had just heard. Married. “You and ma are gonna get married?” she whimpered. Carl smiled at her. “I’ll be your pa soon enough.” “No!” Claudia cried. She jerked her arm free and then ran to the door leading to the back porch where she knew her mother was. Her mother would tell her the truth, they weren’t getting married. They just couldn’t. However, she stopped in her tracks when she saw her mother through the window next to the door. She was fighting with Mister Hickok. She couldn’t hear the words, but they both looked so angry. Claudia glanced at Carl, who was tapping his foot impatiently, whistling that same annoying tune. She looked back out the window. They were still fighting. Then she glanced at Carrie and disappeared into a throng of people. Chapter Thirty “I think I found her tracks,” Small Knife whispered to Jimmy. Jimmy was taking a coat from Ryan who had volunteered to supply everyone with whatever they might need with goods from his store. “Can you track as good as your pa?” Jimmy asked wryly. “Better,” Small Knife said, unable to keep the bravado from his voice. “I’m coming too,” Carrie announced, rushing to Small Knife’s side. Jimmy shook his head and left the two young people to argue the matter. “There’s no point,” Small Knife began. It wasn’t that he didn’t have confidence in her abilities to keep up with them. It was that nagging feeling inside him. What if they found Claudia too late? He didn’t want Carrie to find one of the students she had become so close to like that. And the way Carrie was acting, he suspected that she was thinking the same thing. “No point,” Carrie sputtered, but Small Knife could see she wasn’t angry. When Carrie was angry, she didn’t bother to hide it. Carrie was frightened. “I know her, how she thinks. I’ve seen her almost every day for the past couple of weeks!” “So tell me where to look,” Small Knife retorted. Carrie turned away from him. She hated when he acted all superior. “Carrie,” Small Knife began hesitantly. Carrie whirled around. “This is all my fault,” she cried. “Why won’t you let me fix it?” Small Knife stared at her in surprise. “Your fault? How is it your fault?” “I know she wants Uncle Jimmy to be her pa, I know her ma is seeing someone else and did I do anything about it? No, I just blabbed about my stupid matchmaking efforts.” Her eyes began to fill with tears. “She knows about me and the well. I saw her, standing there, listening, but I didn’t do anything.” She shook her head. “The one time I should have meddled, I didn’t.” Small Knife raised one of his hands and wiped away Carrie’s tears. “Seems to me, your meddling usually turns out alright,” he said with a slight smile. Carrie hurriedly brushed away the rest of her tears, embarrassed to be seen acting so childishly. She wanted to show Small Knife she wasn’t a little girl anymore and crying like a baby certainly wasn’t the way she had intended to show him. “I’m sorry. This ain’t about me.” Ethan ran toward Small Knife and threw him his coat. “I’m heading east with Mister McCloud.” Small Knife nodded. The tracks he had seen, the tracks he was certain were Claudia’s were going southeast, so east was good. He just had to send a group south and they could work in a grid-like pattern, covering that whole section of land. Ethan glanced at Carrie’s blotchy face. “What’s wrong with you?” Small Knife gave Carrie’s shoulders a quick squeeze before he put on his coat. “She thinks this is all her fault.” “It’s mine more than it is yours,” Ethan said and there was no trace of his usual humor in his voice. “I shouldn’t keep bringing that well thing into every conversation,” he said in a rare moment of sincerity. Then he grinned at her. “But it sure is fun to see you get all riled up.” Carrie smiled weakly at him. “Some of the ladies are looking around here, in the brush and stuff,” Ethan continued. Carrie narrowed her eyes at him. She could ride better than him! But Ethan was the closest thing she had to a big brother, so she kept her mouth shut. He would pay for that remark later. She gave Small Knife a sidelong glance. Some people thought she had two big brothers. But what they didn’t realize was that she had never thought of Small Knife as a brother. Not even once. But there was little she could do about it, as she knew about his first love, the infernal Red Berry. Small Knife had carried a torch for this woman for as long as she could remember. A fact which frustrated Carrie to no end. How could she ever compete with that woman? She had never even seen her. Small Knife rarely saw her too. Thus Carrie fumed silently whenever he recited Red Berry’s many virtues. He hardly even knew the woman, so how could he think so highly of her?! “She’s coming with me,” Small Knife said in a voice that would broker no argument. Ethan simply shrugged and went to join Kid. “I remember what it was like, finding you after you were in that well,” Small Knife said quietly. The guilt had eaten at him for weeks. If he could help Carrie make this up, then he would. Even though she really wasn’t responsible, Small Knife knew how it felt to be the one on the guilt receiving end of things. “Thanks,” Carrie said softly. She wasn’t quite sure what had caused Small Knife to do this for her, but she didn’t question it. It was the way Small Knife was. He did things that made no sense to most folks, yet those things always helped. And this particular act helped her immensely. She would have hated the thought of looking through already searched brush. She wanted to help, as she could not shake the feeling that she had let Claudia down somehow. Carrie pulled her skirt through her legs and gathered the ends in her waistband, creating a makeshift riding skirt. She raised a brow. “Not bad, huh?” Small Knife touched her cheek. “Not bad at all.” He didn’t understand how it had all changed so quickly. But little Carrie MacCallister had grown up while he was away at school. And everything he ever felt for her before had changed into something wild and wonderful. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ “How is she?” Jimmy whispered to Lou as he glanced at Abby. She was silent now, Carl had just come in from searching outside. Jimmy had to grudgingly admit that the man was trying. He was the first one out and the last one to return. Carl took a spot beside Abby, patting her hand. For a while she had been hysterical, running through brush, searching everywhere for her daughter. But Jimmy preferred that. Her silence only showed him how much despair filled her. “Jimmy!” Abby cried, jerking her hand free and running toward him. Jimmy caught her in his arms, his fingers tracing the scrape on her cheek, made by a sharp twig. “She’s gone, she’s gone,” Abby began to babble. She couldn’t even seem to think straight. Her baby was gone! All she really had in this world was her child and she couldn’t find her. She had run from room to room, searching, then outside, looking behind every tree, under every brush, but she couldn’t find her daughter. She lifted Claudia’s coat, which she had been clutching for what seemed like hours. “She’s out there, all alone and she doesn’t even have her coat.” Abby began to sob. Jimmy shook her lightly, trying to get her to concentrate on him. “Abby.” He shook her once more. “Abby!” Abby’s eyes focused on him. She brushed her fingers against the jacket he wore. It wasn’t his. She was still wearing his. “Are you going out to look for her?” she asked quietly. “Yeah,” Jimmy replied. “Good.” Abby began moving toward the door. She had wanted to ride out the instant Carl had said he couldn’t find Claudia. But no one agreed with her. They all wanted to search the building and the surrounding grounds. It was only now that the group was considering widening their search. Abby had been pleased at first but she grew steadily more afraid. With each passing minute Claudia could be further and further away from them. And worst of all, she was out there in the freezing cold longer and longer. Jimmy stared at her. She thought she was coming with him. He caught her before she had even taken three steps. “You ain’t coming.” “I have to,” Abby shouted. Then she began to cry once more as the gnawing feeling in her stomach grew larger, gripping her so tightly she could barely breathe. “I have to. She’s out there.” Jimmy pulled her up, forcing her to look at him. “I’ll find her. You go home. Doc Mathews said he would wait with you. We’ll bring Claudia home.” Jimmy fervently hoped that the doctor’s help would not be needed. But he wanted Doc there, just in case. “Jimmy,” Abby protested. “You’ll only slow us down,” Jimmy said harshly, soon regretting his outburst. He was probably as frightened as Abby was but he couldn’t let her see it. He just couldn’t. “I’m sorry,” he said quickly, pulling Abby against him. “I’ll find her,” Jimmy murmured, stroking her hair. “I swear to you that I’ll find her.” Abby nodded feeling herself go numb. Jimmy was right. She was no good to them. She couldn’t ride as fast as any of these people. She couldn’t follow tracks. She was utterly useless. She wasn’t even fit to be a mother. What kind of mother lost her own child? Jimmy turned to Carl, who stood a few feet away. “Get her home.” And when he passed Abby into Carl’s arms, he added softly, “take care of her.” Chapter Thirty–One Doc Mathews turned his head and glanced at Abby. She was still sitting on the couch, motionless. She only glanced away from the door once, to shoot Carl a blank look. Carl was hovering about, trying to cajole Abby into drinking some coffee. Doc longed to tell the man to sit down and stop his fluttering. It was making him nervous. But he didn’t get a chance, as his son and Kid came inside the Morton home. Abby fixed her eyes on Ethan and Kid. And for one brief instant, Doc saw the flickering of hope in Abby’s eyes as they locked with Kid’s. But that instant passed and so did the hope. She knew, as did Doc, that Kid and Ethan had no luck. They had not found Claudia. But he had to ask. “Any luck?” Ethan shook his head. “Couldn’t find any sign of her,” Kid replied. He and Ethan removed their outerwear. Ethan came to stand beside his father by the window and Kid sat down on the couch next to Abby. He simply took her hand and sat quietly beside her. And almost a half and hour later, the same scene replayed itself. The only difference was the characters at the front door. This time Teaspoon and Polly entered. Polly rushed into the kitchen and began setting out food she had brought with her. She knew the searchers would be starving. But even though the delicious smells filled the small house, no one made a move toward the food. No one had the heart. Teaspoon stood beside Doc and Ethan. “How long can a little girl with no coat last out there?” he asked the doctor. Doc Mathews just shook his head. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ Small Knife turned his horse, frustrated as the snow kept falling, muddying the ground, which had thawed in spots and covered many of Claudia’s tracks. Jimmy stopped his horse, removing his hat and running his hand through his hair. Small Knife may be an able tracker, but he wished Buck were here. He missed Buck’s steadfastness. Carrie pulled her own horse up, frowning as her horse slipped and just as quickly regained his footing. “Claudia walks home this way,” she said thoughtfully. Then she turned her mount and began heading down the slope to her left. “Where are you going?” Jimmy called out irritably. “Just a hunch,” Carrie yelled back. If Claudia was out here, she would stick to what was familiar. And if she did try to walk along this ridge, there was a chance she might have lost her footing and tumbled down the hill. Carrie didn’t think Claudia would ignore Jimmy’s calls. She wanted him to find her and bring her back to her mother. Then she jumped off her horse and began shouting in earnest. “She’s here! She’s here!” Jimmy leapt off his horse and Small Knife did the same. Both men scrambled down the hill, slipping and sliding the whole way. “Claudia,” Jimmy exclaimed, cradling the girl’s head. The front of her dress was covered with blood. But he noted that the bleeding had pretty much stopped. Jimmy bit down on his glove and pulled it off with his teeth. He tossed it to the side as he touched Claudia’s face and hands. She was ice cold. But Jimmy realized if hadn’t been for the cold, Claudia might have bled to death as the cut on her forehead seemed pretty deep to him. “She must have fallen and hit her head,” Small Knife surmised. Claudia’s head was right next to a large elm. Jimmy picked Claudia up and began carrying her limp body up the hill, crooning words, which he hoped would comfort her. He kept up his murmuring the whole way up the hill. Small Knife caught Jimmy as he attempted to mount his horse, Claudia still in his arms. “Wait, we’ll hook up a travois to carry her back.” Jimmy nodded. He stood on the ground and held Claudia close, trying to warm her while Small Knife and Carrie scurried about, gathering the proper materials. Once the travois was connected to Jimmy’s horse, Jimmy laid Claudia down. “Maybe you should sit with her,” Carrie suggested. “You can keep her warm and hold her in place at the same time.” Jimmy shook his head. “You’re smaller. It would be easier for the horse to pull both of you.” “It might be easier,” Carrie responded. “But Claudia knows you better.” She rubbed her gloved hand on Claudia’s cold cheek. “She can hear you and I think it would give her more comfort to have you close by.” Jimmy’s heart rose into his throat. He laid Claudia on the travois and pulled her close. He wasn’t a praying man, so he did the next best thing. He spoke to Jensen. As Small Knife led the horse by the reins, Carrie grabbed the other two animals’ leads and walked alongside him. Jimmy voiced his thoughts as quietly as he could. “I ain’t never asked you for nothing,” he whispered. “Not even in the worst days of my life. But I’m asking now. Don’t let Claudia die.” He kissed the top of Claudia’s head. “Please. You gave me another chance and I didn’t deserve it. So if I owe you a life then you take mine. Not hers.” Jimmy choked out the last two words. “You hear me? Not hers.” Chapter Thirty–Two Carrie and Small Knife burst through the door and Abby rose to her feet, her eyes filled with hope. Jimmy had to have her, he promised. And when Jimmy walked in, Claudia in his arms, Abby ran to him. She opened her mouth to speak but no words came out as her heart had risen into her throat. Doc snatched Claudia away from Jimmy and rushed into the child’s bedroom. Ethan hurried after him, knowing he could be of assistance, as did Polly. Small Knife and Carrie began removing their boots and coats, but Jimmy didn’t bother. He simply held Abby in his arms. And then they left, walking quickly to the bedroom Doc had taken Claudia into, Abby still leaning heavily upon Jimmy. Teaspoon stared at them. They were acting like Claudia’s parents. What had happened? Then he glanced at Carl. The man was obviously seething and rightly so. Abby was involved with him. “Doc wants to know where the tub is?” Polly asked Teaspoon awkwardly as she made her re-appearance. Teaspoon shrugged. How was he supposed to know? Ethan came into the living room. “My father said to fill the tub with warm water.” Polly grabbed a hold of Ethan’s sleeve. “Well let’s go see what we can find then.” Together, Ethan, Polly and Teaspoon found the tub and carried it into the bedroom. And after they heated the water, they took turns carrying potfuls of it into the bedroom where they had moved the tub. When Polly was heating another batch, Teaspoon sank down into the couch, feeling utterly exhausted. What a night! He just wasn’t up to this kind of thing anymore. He glanced at Carl, who sat with hands folded in his lap. “Do you think she will be okay?” Carl asked. “I dunno,” Teaspoon replied. Carl stood up. “I’m not doing anyone any good here.” He looked at Teaspoon awkwardly. “I feel like I’m in the way.” “Son,” Teaspoon began. Carl raised a hand. “Don’t. I never expected a woman like Abby Morton to fall for me, not really. But I had hoped.” He stopped. “It was all going so well.” Carl sighed deeply. “Probably too well.” He picked up his hat and coat and started toward the door. “Carl,” Teaspoon called out. “Abby’s distraught. And when Claudia wakes up, she’ll probably be glad to see you here too.” Carl shook his head. “I’m not what Claudia wants in a father. Claudia has some pie-in-the-sky ideas about a father. And I ain’t no hero. I’m ‘bout as ordinary as they come.” Teaspoon frowned. He picked up more than a trace of self-pity in Carl’s words. And that bothered him. “I’ll stop by tomorrow. She might need me then,” Carl added, “when all of you are gone.” With that pronouncement, Carl left. And Teaspoon stared at the door. What kind of people did Carl figure them for? The kind that would walk out on a woman and child in need? Teaspoon took a deep breath. There was no need to judge the man so harshly. He had obviously been through a lot. Almost losing Claudia and seeing Jimmy and Abby so close. But still... Just to leave, not say a word to Abby, not to ask the doctor about Claudia, well it all rubbed Teaspoon the wrong way. Chapter Thirty–Three A few hours later, Small Knife and Carrie settled the horses in Abby’s ramshackle barn. It was the least they could do. Ethan and his father, along with Teaspoon and Polly were inside trying to help with Claudia. Kid had just left a few minutes ago. He had to tell Lou what was going on, along with Ryan and Rachel. Ryan had opened the hardware store earlier and was now putting it back together. When the groups assembled before their search, supplies had been taken so quickly a rather large mess had been created. Carrie stared at the house, recalling the scene with her uncle Jimmy and Claudia. “He really loves her, doesn’t he?” Small Knife nodded. He knew exactly whom Carrie was talking about. They had always been close and could almost read each other’s thoughts, sometimes. “I think he was praying to my father’s first wife.” “He knew her?” “From what I’ve heard, they were friends.” Small Knife felt the sudden need for comfort and took Carrie’s hand in his. How close had they come to losing Claudia? They could have ridden right by that tree and not even noticed her prone form. Sometimes he wondered if that’s why he wanted to become a doctor, everywhere he looked, he was reminded of the sheer fragility of life. Carrie looked at him surprised. “I’m glad you came with us,” Small Knife said softly. Carrie grinned. “‘That’s ‘cause I found her.” But her laughter quickly died. “She was out there an awful long time.” “Carrie,” Small Knife whispered. “She’ll be fine.” But even he wasn’t sure so how could he convince anyone, let alone Carrie, who knew him better than anyone, save Ethan. Carrie wrapped her arms around him. He was her rock. The one she always turned to in good times and bad. She knew he was promised to another girl. But dammit all, he was hers. And it was as if Small Knife was experiencing the very same feelings as she was. He pulled Carrie close and kissed her softly. They had kissed before when they were younger, playing silly games at children’s parties. But this was different, this kiss made her stomach flip flop. Small Knife was a man and she was a woman. In spite of what her father thought, she was seventeen now and a woman. A few of her friends had even gotten married. “Jeeze,” Ethan exclaimed. He had just stepped into the barn to get Small Knife. His father wanted them both to gather some snow and melt it for more water. It was difficult keeping the tub water at a constant temperature so water needed to be heated continuously. Small Knife and Carrie jumped apart. Carrie stared at him but when Small Knife looked away, she ran out of the barn. “Carrie,” Small Knife called out. “Wait.” He knew he shouldn’t have looked away, but he had to. Because if he had looked at her, he would have kissed her again and again. “Wait for what?” Ethan shouted. “You treat her like she matters, like she is important, then you just haul off and kiss her. You made a promise to Red Berry! Never figured you for a two-timer.” “Red Berry is engaged to another,” Small Knife yelled back. “So you are using Carrie to get back at her?” Ethan raged. “I’d never use Carrie like that,” Small Knife retorted. Ethan stared at him. Small Knife was his friend and he knew he would never hurt Carrie intentionally. But still, to see him kissing her! “I got the letter last week,” Small Knife continued. “And you didn’t say anything?” “Nothing to say, really.” “Are you going to the reservation?” Ethan asked. “You know, to try and win her back.” “No.” “Why not?” Small Knife looked toward the house, where he knew Carrie was. “When I got the letter, I wasn’t angry, I wasn’t sad.” He paused. “I was relieved.” “Relieved?” Ethan exclaimed. “I’m free now.” Small Knife continued to watch the house, as if he hoped Carrie would re-appear. Ethan clapped him on the shoulder. “I was right all along, wasn’t I?” He picked up a bucket and handed it to Small Knife. He hadn’t forgotten why he had come out here in the first place. Small Knife stepped outside and watched as Ethan began scooping snow into the bucket. Then he did the same. “Right?” “Didn’t I always tell you that you liked Carrie more than you let on?” Small Knife grinned. “Even a moron like you can be right once in a while.” Chapter Thirty–Four It was early the next morning when Jimmy felt Doc Mathews shake him as he had dozed off in the seat he had pulled up next to Claudia’s bed. “Claudia,” Jimmy said quickly, shaking off the last vestiges of sleep. Doc smiled. He pointed at Abby who was sitting on the bed, smoothing Claudia’s hair back from the bandage that covered her head and forehead. “She woke up a few minutes ago.” As Jimmy rushed to the bed, Doc added, “don’t think she will lose any fingers or toes.” Claudia’s digits were pink and warm. But her head wound worried him. He wanted to discuss the matter further, but he didn’t want to worry Abby either. It wasn’t life threatening so Doc decided to keep it to himself for a little longer. “How you doing little lady?” Jimmy asked softly. Claudia looked at him solemnly. “Okay.” Abby kissed Claudia’s cheek. “You scared us half to death.” Then she paused and when she spoke again, her voice was filled with anguish. “Were you running away from home?” “No.” “So why did you run off?” Jimmy asked. Claudia had obviously been upset. “You were fighting,” Claudia whispered. “Me and Mister Hickok?” Abby asked. Claudia’s head bobbed up and down. Abby held her daughter’s hand. “Grown-ups fight sometimes. It doesn’t mean we aren’t friends anymore. Just means we don’t agree on a particular matter.” “Are you still fighting?” Claudia asked. “No,” Abby said softly. They weren’t fighting, but did that mean they were friends? Jimmy had said a lot of things to her, things she never expected to hear. So what did that make them now? “You’re not leaving, are you?” Claudia asked Jimmy. Jimmy glanced at Abby, who was watching him as well. “No,” he answered. “I’ll stay as long as you promise to stay put.” “I’ll stay put.” Claudia smiled. “I knew you’d find me.” Abby frowned as she realized her daughter had run off for the sole purpose of Jimmy finding her. What was going on in that head of hers? “Claudia,” she scolded her. “What you did was dangerous. You could have frozen to death out there.” “I would have been fine if that man hadn’t hit me in the head,” Claudia muttered. “What man?” Jimmy and Abby exclaimed in unison. “The boogie man,” Claudia answered. Abby gave Jimmy a sidelong look. Claudia’s imagination was obviously running wild. And Abby really couldn’t blame her. Who wouldn’t think such thoughts, being out there alone, in the dark? “Why don’t you two get something to eat. I don’t need any more patients on my hands,” Doc told Jimmy and Abby. When he saw both of them hesitate, he added, “I’ll stay right here until you come back.” And so it went for the rest of the day, people came and went, bringing food and asking about Claudia’s condition. Carl put in an appearance, but when he saw the crowd gathered at Abby’s house, he soon departed. Teaspoon and Polly remained until dinnertime and when they left, they took Carrie with them, even though Small Knife offered to take Carrie. He wanted desperately to talk to her, but she was avoiding him. He cursed himself for kissing her. She obviously didn’t care about him, not the way he cared about her. And when the doctor and Ethan left, Small Knife went with them. A few hours later, Jimmy built the fire up to keep the small house warm. He didn’t want Claudia to feel even a hint of cold. Abby sat down next to him and handed him one of the cookies Rachel had sent over. “She’s asleep,” she said happily. Her daughter had been so ill, but no one would know it by looking at Claudia now. Jimmy’s eyes locked with Abby’s and held her gaze until she finally looked away. She was so damn beautiful. Her normally tidy bun was askew and tendrils hung all about her face, making Jimmy want to smooth it back from her eyes. Abby felt a shiver go down her spine. Jimmy pulled her close and asked, “still cold?” Abby leaned back against him. “No.” It wasn’t the cold that gave her shivers. It was the way Jimmy was looking at her. “I can stay here again if you want,” Jimmy said softly. She must be scared, almost losing her daughter. This scene reminded him a bit of the night Abby had been hurt. And like last time, he saw Abby hesitate, so he added, “on the couch.” Abby rested her head against Jimmy’s cheek and mustered up every bit of courage she had. “You don’t have to stay on the couch.” Jimmy moved back so he could look at Abby’s eyes. But she was still looking at the fire. “Abby,” he began. Abby continued to stare at the fire as she spoke. “We’ve been heading this way for a while.” She finally turned around, looked at Jimmy and ran her hand down his cheek. “If you hadn’t run into that awful woman in Hastings, we’d be here. If the marshal hadn’t brought me home that night we had dinner at his place, we’d be here. If Carl hadn’t interrupted us or if Claudia hadn’t of run off, we’d be here.” Abby pressed her lips against Jimmy before she spoke once more. “What you said to me yesterday...” She choked back a small sob. “No one has ever said anything like that to me. What you have done for me...” And this time she couldn’t stop the tears. “I love you.” Jimmy brushed back a lock of her hair, kissing her tears away. “You sure what you’re feeling ain’t gratitude?” Abby began to protest as Jimmy spoke once more. “I gave you the money because I wanted you to have it. No strings attached,” he said. “I’ll be here for you, no matter what.” Even if she married Carl, he would be there. As Jimmy tried to add on to his words, Abby silenced him with a kiss. “This isn’t about the money or even about you finding Claudia.” She kissed him once more and this time Jimmy kissed her back. This is about the way you came outside to find me at the restaurant when I was out there, all alone. This is about the way you gave me your coat and stood out there with me, even though you were freezing,” Abby whispered. As Jimmy’s lips moved down to her neck almost of their own volition, Abby wrapped her arms around him and moved her body close to his. “This is about the way you think about me and Claudia. This is about the way you are willing to play with her and always cheer her up,” she said. Abby smiled. “And about your terrible porridge and stealing eggs. This is about -” But Abby didn’t get a chance to continue as Jimmy kissed her lips. Abby moved so she was lying down. And when Jimmy tugged at the buttons of her dress, she pulled at his shirt, longing to touch him. As Jimmy moved on top of her, she whispered, “I love you.” Chapter Thirty-Five Claudia sat at the table, eating her breakfast and watching Jimmy and her mother very, very closely. They kept smiling at each other. And their hands kept touching, whenever they passed a plate or rose from the table. Any old excuse seemed to do. And Claudia grinned. It had worked. Her plan had worked! Her mother never seemed this happy when Carl touched her and now she couldn’t stop beaming. “Are you gonna marry Mister Hickok?” Claudia said suddenly. Abby almost dropped the dish she was carrying to the sink. “Claudia,” she scolded her daughter. Talk about jumping the gun. She and Jimmy hadn’t even discussed marriage, well not concretely. All their declarations had been so abstract. She knew he loved her, but marriage! “I haven’t been asked,” Abby said primly, trying to pass Claudia’s remark off as a joke. Jimmy grinned and took her hand. And when he did, Abby’s knees began to shake. He was going to ask her, she was sure of it. Abby clamped her lips shut to keep her yes from bursting out. But when all three of them heard the knock at the door, their faces fell simultaneously. Claudia jumped up and looked out the window. “It’s Mister Boatwright,” she said dejectedly. “Carl,” Abby whispered. She had forgotten the man even existed. “Make him go away!” Claudia burst out angrily. Abby stared at her daughter. She knew that Claudia preferred Jimmy to Carl and she certainly didn’t fault her for that. But to be so adamant, well it gave her pause. “I don’t like him,” Claudia cried. She ran to Jimmy. “He’s mean. I don’t want him to be my pa.” She looked up at Jimmy. “You don’t use switches on kids, do you?” “What?” Abby exclaimed. Switches? Jimmy looked at Abby, then back to Claudia, then to the door. “He used a switch on you?” he asked, his voice dangerously quiet. “I didn’t mean to be bad,” Claudia said softly. She knew she didn’t listen to Mr. Boatwright when her mother asked him to watch her when she had to work later than expected. But he made the silliest demands on her, like telling her to pick up her room when it was already clean, or demanding that she show him her homework when she didn’t have any. “He just didn’t listen to me. I tried to tell him that my room was already clean or that I didn’t have any homework. But the more I tried, the madder he would get. “Then one time I told him he wasn’t my pa and he switched me something fierce,” Claudia told them. She watched Mr. Hickok and her mother closely. They were so upset. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it.” Her eyes began to fill with tears. Carl had told her that her mother would be angry when she heard about what she had done, how she didn’t mind him. “He used a switch on you?” Abby yelled. Who the hell did that man think he was? Abby grabbed a spatula sitting on the counter and flung the door open. She promptly began beating Carl about the shoulders with it. “You hit my daughter?!” she shouted. “Do you enjoy being hit? Carl tried to cover his face. He stepped backwards to avoid being hit, but he was unsuccessful. Abby wielded that spatula with a vengeance. “Or is it that you just enjoy beating children?” she asked contemptuously. Jimmy picked up Claudia and moved to the door and together they watched as Abby continued to rain blows upon Carl. “Abby, stop,” Carl cried. “I love both you and Claudia. You are my family.” “Family?” Abby yelled. She swatted Carl across face, leaving an angry red gash in its wake. “You’re not fit to be her father.” And she was a fool for ever thinking that he would be. Carl snatched the spatula away from Abby. And Jimmy saw the fury in the man’s eyes. He quickly set Claudia down and grabbed Abby. He wasn’t about to let Carl retaliate. “I think you need to go,” Jimmy said quietly. “Me?” Carl sputtered. “I’m the one who Abby has been seeing.” He looked at Abby as though she was wearing a scarlet letter. “And what is he doing here? Did he stay the night?” he asked her contemptuously. Don’t say it, Jimmy willed him. He knew what Carl was implying and for now he would choose to ignore it. But not for very long. He had reason to feel betrayed. He believed that Jimmy had come in and stolen Abby from right under his nose, obviously not knowing that Jimmy and Abby had come this close to being a couple a few months ago. Yet this was still the man who had hit Claudia. “Come back here again,” Jimmy said, his eyes fixed on Carl. “And I won’t stop her.” He set Abby behind him. “And if you do get any ideas about coming back, you won’t be dealing with a six-year-old or a woman with a spatula.” “How long have you been carrying on?” Carl shouted. “Behind my back.” Abby lunged at him. Jimmy caught her once more. “I think it’s best if you leave. Now.” “The whole town is talking about it,” Carl continued angrily. “The way you are living in sin with this man. He’s making a whore of you!” Carl’s voice broke with the last few words. “I treated you good. I put you on a pedestal and now look at you. You don’t deserve to be treated like a lady. “I’d rather be his whore than your wife,” Abby shot back. “When he breaks your heart, don’t even think of coming back to me,” Carl retorted. That was it, Jimmy decided. He grabbed Carl’s lapels and shoved him in the direction of his horse. “You think you can come here and speak to Abby like that?” he asked Carl angrily.” “What you’re doing ain’t decent,” Carl yelled. “I did right by Abby.” “You used her. She fit in with your plans of a pretty little wife, cooking and keeping house for you,” Jimmy snapped. “You knew she was a widow who needed help and you used that against her. You and your house, your proper ways,” he spat out the words. “You don’t know her at all. And I don’t think you want to. She has a child who means the world to her and you hurt that girl.” “I did no such thing,” Carl exclaimed. “She’s a little girl and you took a switch to her!” “She’s a spoiled brat who needs a firm hand.” Carl stared at Jimmy. “At least I was willing to give her that much.” “She’s a little girl,” Jimmy repeated. “Who would do anything you asked if she thought you cared about her. You just never bothered to take the time to get to know her.” “You think you’re so much better than me,” Carl shouted. “You’re nothing but a washed up legend who spends far too much time in the saloon.” Jimmy gave Carl one final shove. “I’m an officer of the law and you best leave before I change my mind and haul you in. Assault is a punishable offense.” “Assault?” Carl bellowed. “You ain’t got no right disciplining Claudia.” If that’s what Carl called discipline. “She ain’t your child. So you hit someone you ain’t got no claim to,” Jimmy informed him. “Now get the hell out of here.” When he saw that Carl was on his way, Jimmy turned and went back to the house. Chapter Thirty-Six When Jimmy found Abby, she was in the parlor, pacing. “She has a few marks on the back of her legs,” Abby told him. “Where is she?” Jimmy asked. “In bed. I wanted her to rest for a bit.” “Should I get the doctor?” “I don’t know,” Abby whispered. She stopped her pacing. “How could I have been so blind?” she cried. “This ain’t your fault,” Jimmy said. “No, then whose fault is it? I’m the one who asked Carl to watch her for me.” She covered her face with her hands. “I’m the one who brought him into this house.” Carl Boatwright had walked into her life and let her believe he was the ultimate family man. She had thought that he was being kind and generous, including both Abby and Claudia in his rich and full life. Jimmy gathered her into his arms. “He knew that you needed help and he used that against you. Anyone can plainly see you want the best for Claudia. So he showed you that he had the best, a big ranch, money to buy her everything you couldn’t. Everything you dreamed about for Claudia, he already had. “I’ve seen that kind of man before,” Jimmy continued. “You think he is one thing, but he is really another. Carl came off as the perfect gentleman. We all thought so. The worst thing even Cook could come up with was to call him broccoli.” Abby buried her head against his chest. “How do you know all that?” “I’ve been around,” Jimmy replied. “I just wish I had figured it all out sooner.” That Carl was a smooth one. Jimmy had to hand it to him. No one suspected anything was amiss. “It all fell into place when I saw his face today. I thought he was gonna kill you. And that kind of anger isn’t something that just comes and goes. It stays with a man day in and day out.” “I didn’t see it,” Abby said softly. She couldn’t shake the hopelessness that filled her. Once again she had failed her child. “Because he didn’t want you too. But if you look back, it’s easier to see.” Jimmy said. “Remember how he didn’t stick around after I brought Claudia here.” Abby nodded. “That’s because he saw you weren’t alone. He couldn’t manipulate the situation to his advantage.” Abby frowned at him, certain he was trying to put Carl in the worst possible light to make her feel better. But she knew the truth, she had let Claudia down. “Now you are making him out to be some kind of mastermind.” “He ain’t no mastermind,” Jimmy said. “Just a man who wants things his way and his way only. And he hit Claudia because she didn’t wanna do things his way.” “But why me?” Jimmy kissed the tip of her nose. “You ever look in a mirror?” he said teasingly. “Don’t.” Abby turned away from him unable to make light of the situation. “I don’t know,” Jimmy said simply. He wished he had sold his guns earlier. Abby wouldn’t have had to lean on anyone then. “It’s because I was stupid,” Abby half-shouted. “You know what I thought when Claudia started getting dressed without any help. I thought it was wonderful. That she was growing up. But she was hiding those marks from me!” Jimmy tried to speak, but he was shouted down by Abby. “My own daughter couldn’t tell me that someone was hurting her.” As Abby began to sob, Jimmy led her to the sofa and pulled her close. “This ain’t your fault,” he murmured. Abby wiped her eyes. “It is and you know it is, so stop trying to make me feel better.” She cried even harder then. “You had better run while you can because I’m just gonna mess up your life the way I’ve messed up Claudia’s.” “I’m here,” Jimmy murmured. “And I ain’t going nowhere. And I don’t think you can mess up my life any more than I have.” He smiled into her hair. “It just ain’t possible.” Abby managed a weak smile as she wrapped her arms around him. “And Claudia is fine,” Jimmy continued. “She knows it was all Carl. I just wish you’d believe it too.” “Ma,” Claudia called out, coming into the room. She looked at Jimmy, her eyes frightened. “Is something wrong?” “No, sweetie,” Abby said quickly, drying her eyes with the handkerchief Jimmy gave her. “Your ma is just upset that Mister Boatwright hit you,” Jimmy said. He didn’t want Abby to try to hide this from Claudia. This needed to come out and now was as good a time as any. Claudia dropped her eyes. “He told you I was bad, didn’t he?” “No,” Abby told her. “He was bad. It ain’t right for grown men to hit little girls. I’m so sorry I let him hurt you.” Claudia ran to her mother. “You can tell me things like that,” Abby continued. Claudia nodded. “Were you scared to tell me?” Abby asked. “He said you’d be mad ‘cause I didn’t mind him,” Claudia replied. And as Abby burst into fresh tears, Jimmy hugged both of them. This wasn’t going to be so easy to solve. Chapter Thirty-Seven Small Knife stood awkwardly outside the schoolhouse, waiting. A few seconds later the bell rung and a host of students streamed out. And fifteen minutes later, Carrie stepped out carrying a few books. “Afternoon,” she said formally when she caught sight of Small Knife. “Carrie,” Small Knife began. “Lovely weather we’re having, isn’t it?” Carrie kept her voice deliberately bland. “I’m sorry for what happened,” Small Knife said quickly. “But the marshal thinks it is going to snow. He says he can feel it in his bones.” “Carrie!” Small Knife shouted. “I didn’t come here to discuss the weather with you.” Carrie looked at him blankly. “About the other day,” he started again. Carrie waved her hand dismissively. “Oh that. I had already forgotten about it.” Liar. That kiss was burned in her brain. But she wasn’t about to let Small Knife know that. “Well I haven’t stop thinking about it,” Small Knife snapped. He raked his hand through his long dark hair in frustration. “Sorry. I didn’t come here to yell.” “Then why did you come here? To apologize for kissing me? To list Red Berry’s virtues? What?” Carrie shouted, her own frustration boiling over. She loved that man and now he was here apologizing for kissing her, really kissing her, something she had longed for since she was thirteen! “Oh.” Small Knife’s eyebrows shot up as he understood Carrie’s frosty behavior. “Red Berry.” “Get out of my way,” Carrie yelled. “I have to get to the Morton’s and give Claudia her homework.” She had volunteered to take Claudia’s work to her and help her finish it. “Red Berry is getting married,” Small Knife said casually. “Congratulations,” Carrie said tartly, starting to walk away rapidly. “I’m sure the two of you will be very happy.” “I am very happy,” Small Knife smiled. Go jump into a lake, Carrie thought to herself and she continued to march away. “And I’m sure Red Berry and White Eagle will be too,” he added. Carrie stopped in her tracks. And when she turned around, she saw Small Knife was grinning at her like an idiot. “Who?” Small Knife glanced at the sky. “I think you are right about that snow.” This time Small Knife kept his voice casual. Carrie grabbed his arm. “Who is White Eagle?” she asked quickly. “The man Red Berry is going to marry,” Small Knife informed her. “Oh.” Carrie frowned, her face registering her bewilderment. “Then why are you happy?” Small Knife pulled her into his arms. “Because I didn’t have to end things.” Carrie’s eyes were as wide as saucers as she stared up at him. “What? End things? End things with Red Berry? Why would you do that?” “Because I care for another,” Small Knife said. When Carrie continued to just stare at him, he added, “you.” “Me?” Small Knife nodded. “I’m sorry it took me so long to figure it out.” “Me!” Small Knife kissed her. “It’s always been you.” Carrie flung her arms around him and kissed him back. Then suddenly she broke away. “You sure this isn’t about Red Berry ‘cause if it is . . .” She looked at him threateningly. Small Knife draped an arm across her shoulders. “This,” he said, “has been going on for years. I just didn’t see it.” Carrie smiled. She had always thought that Small Knife was so much brighter than Ethan, but as it turned out he was just as slow, when it came to relationships. And as they continued to walk, she was suddenly glad for that. If he had been in any sort of hurry, he would have already married Red Berry. Chapter Thirty-Eight Abby opened her front door and found Carrie and Small Knife there. “Come in.” “I brought Claudia her homework,” Carrie explained. She gestured to Small Knife. “He’s just tagging along.” Abby smiled. “Claudia is in her bedroom. I don’t know if she’ll be happy about the homework, but she’ll be thrilled to see you. She thinks the world of you.” Carrie was one of Claudia’s favorite subjects. Carrie flushed slightly, embarrassed by the praise. “Thank you.” She and Small Knife followed Abby to the bedroom, where Claudia was playing with her doll. “Miss MacCallister,” Claudia cried out enthusiastically. It wasn’t often that your teacher came to your home. “You came to see me?” Carrie waved a book. “Homework.” She laughed when Carrie’s face fell. Abby smiled as well. “Well I’ll just leave you to your work.” And while Small Knife poked at Claudia’s dollhouse, Carrie helped her with her reading and a few sums. “Not so bad, huh?” Carrie asked when they were finally through. Claudia pulled a face. “So you think you’ll be coming back to school soon?” “I hope so. Don’t tell ma, but I’m running out of games to play with Becky.” Claudia pointed to the doll in the dollhouse. Carrie grinned while Small Knife picked up the doll then promptly dropped it. Scrambling to pick it up, he noticed that the head popped off. “I’m sorry, I think I broke it,” he said apologetically. “He’s a bit clumsy,” Carrie said nonchalantly. Small Knife scowled fiercely at Carrie, but even Claudia could tell that this exchange was all in fun. Claudia snatched the doll back. “That’s okay. I take it off all the time.” Small Knife gave her a strange look, as if he couldn’t fathom the idea of anyone decapitating their doll. “See,” Claudia said, pulling out a worn piece of paper from the doll’s body. “It’s a note my pa wrote.” She looked solemnly at Carrie and Small Knife. “He died a long time ago and I don’t remember him so I keep this in her and...” Carrie fished around, her tongue poking through her lips as she concentrated. “This,” she said triumphantly holding out a silver locket with a heart on the end. Claudia opened up the heart and a small key fell into her palm. “My pa gave this to my ma when they got married.” Claudia frowned as she tried to remember the rest of the story. “He told her he was giving her the key to his heart.” Small Knife suppressed a groan at the sappiness of the gesture. But he supposed it would go over well with a woman, especially a woman in love. “He must have loved your mother very much,” Carrie said. Claudia pulled something out from under her bed. “Wanna see what he looked like?” she asked. When Carrie nodded, she handed her a small daguerreotype of a man, a woman and a baby. As Carrie gingerly took the picture she noted that it was of Abby, Claudia as a baby and a man, presumably Claudia’s father. “Your father was very handsome,” Carrie told her, handing back the picture. Claudia nodded her head vigorously. “I keep it now. Sometimes it makes my ma too sad when she sees it,” she said. She pointed to Abby’s form in the picture. “See she was wearing the necklace.” Claudia then began packing all her valuables away. First she slipped the daguerreotype back under her bed and put the key back in the locket then placed the note and the necklace back in the doll. Finally she popped the doll’s head back on. Abby poked her head in. “How you all doing?” “I think we’re finished,” Carrie answered. “Claudia should be right on schedule when she comes back to school.” “Good.” Abby said. “I have some cake that Missus McCloud just sent over.” She grinned at Claudia. “And Mary is here too.” “Mary!” Claudia cried enthusiastically. And as soon as she said the name the girl appeared, her father right behind her. Mary threw herself on Claudia’s bed while Kid admonished her. “You need to take it easy. Claudia has been through a lot.” Mary nodded. “How is your head?” Carrie asked carefully, unsure if she should bring up Claudia’s accident with her. The child must have been so frightened; Carrie didn’t want her to have to re-live it again. But she did want to know how Claudia was feeling. “Good as new.” Claudia smiled. She poked a finger under her bandage and scratched her head. “I get itchy sometimes.” “Does it hurt much?” Mary asked. “I wish you could come back to school.” “I’m fine,” Claudia chirped. “But ma won’t let me go back to school until I see the doctor day after tomorrow.” “You’re a very lucky girl,” Kid said sternly. “Running around out there in the cold. Our horses could barely keep their footing. You’re just lucky you didn’t break your neck when you fell.” Carrie frowned at Kid, wishing him into silence. The child did not need to be lectured. But she knew that’s the way all fathers were. Abby appeared once more. “Cake’s ready if you are.” Small Knife bolted out of the room, his restlessness obvious. He was trailed by Kid. Claudia looked at Carrie seriously, then when Mary nodded, she said, “can I tell you a secret?” Carrie’s frown deepened. “I reckon.” She wondered what the protocol for teachers and secrets was. “I didn’t just slip and fall. The boogie man pushed me,” Claudia said. Someone had to go out there and stop him and Miss MacCallister was one of the bravest people she knew. Mary regarded Carrie with solemn eyes. This was a matter both girls worried about. “I don’t think there really is a boogie man,” Carrie said seriously. “It’s just a story children tell each other.” “There is too and I saw him,” Claudia said vehemently. “He was big and wearing black and he hit me in the head then pushed me.” There was something else too, but she just couldn’t seem to remember. All she could ever recall was the pain in her head and the fear she felt as she began to fall. Carrie stood up quickly. She had to end this now before Claudia got too upset. “I don’t know, but maybe you should tell your ma ‘bout this.” Claudia sighed loudly. “She thinks I have a wild imagination,” she said wearily. Miss MacCallister didn’t believe her either. No one did. There was a bad man out there and no one seemed to care that he might hurt another child. Or that he would come after her again. “Sometimes in the dark we see things that aren’t really there,” Carrie told her sympathetically. She remembered what it was like to be child. The dark had also made her imagination run wild. Claudia slumped down into her bed. “I know,” she muttered. That was what they all said. Carrie patted her arm. “Well maybe I’ll see you tomorrow. If your doctor’s visit goes well, you could be in school again.” Claudia nodded. “Get some rest, okay,” Carrie called back as she stepped out of the room Small Knife and Carrie had a piece of cake and soon said their farewells to Abby and Kid then rode back to their respective homes, discussing their new relationship. After a long detour and an even longer break behind the abandoned Wilson barn, they parted ways. But it had been decided, next week, when Carrie’s father returned from traveling to Council Bluffs with his brother, Small Knife would ask Ryan for his permission to court Carrie. Chapter Thirty-Nine Jimmy held Abby’s hand as they waited while Doc Mathews examined Claudia’s head in his office. After what seemed like an eternity, he turned to them. “It’s healing nicely,” he declared and Jimmy and Abby let out loud sighs of relief. “Can I go back to school then?” Claudia asked quickly. “Don’t see why not,” Doc answered. “Just make sure you get a lot of rest.” “Thank you,” Abby said softly. She pulled out some money and handed it to the doctor. Doc Mathews took a few bills then handed the rest back to Abby. Abby tried to press the remaining bills back into his hand. “Now you best stop that,” Doc chided her. “Our deputy here has already paid me for sewing up Claudia’s head. This little exam doesn’t cost near as much as what you’re trying to give me.” Abby looked at Jimmy in surprise, while he successfully avoided her eyes. “Now why don’t you take this little lady home and makes sure she gets a good night’s rest if she wants to go to school tomorrow,” Doc added. He moved toward Jimmy. “Can you stop by again, maybe tomorrow?” he asked softly, not wanting Abby to overhear and worry needlessly. “I guess,” Jimmy answered with a frown, following Abby and Claudia toward the door. He wondered what Doc was hiding and swallowed his unease before Abby saw it. Obviously Doc didn’t want her to know something was up. As Jimmy, Abby and Claudia stepped out of the office, they called back their thanks to the doctor. “Thank you,” Abby said softly as she walked next to Jimmy while Claudia skipped ahead. Jimmy shrugged. It wasn’t a big deal and he certainly hoped Abby would not make it one. As they continued to walk back to Abby’s home, Jimmy decided that they needed a wagon. These trips by foot were getting tiresome. Once they reached the house, Abby turned to Jimmy. “You’re staying for dinner, right?” Jimmy kissed her soundly. “I was hoping you’d ask.” Abby asked every night and every night he said yes. It was after dinner the awkwardness began. As he wasn’t sure what Abby wanted, Jimmy made a bed on the couch. He knew she needed him to stay, but he didn’t want to push her into something she wasn’t ready for. Ever since the revelation that Carl had used a switch on Claudia, Abby had seemed lost and unsure of herself and everything around her. So Jimmy decided to bide his time. But every night, Abby came out of her bedroom and snuggled up on the couch with him, thus Jimmy’s bewilderment grew. He wished Claudia would go back to school and everything would go back to normal. He wanted to marry that woman, but he didn’t like the idea of her accepting because she was feeling vulnerable. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ Early the next morning Jimmy stopped by the doctor’s office. “You wanted to see me?” Doc moved out from behind his large wooden desk. “Yes. I wanted to discuss something with you.” Jimmy looked at him expectantly. “It’s about Claudia’s head wound,” Doc continued. “I don’t think she hurt herself from hitting a tree.” Small Knife had told him how they had found Claudia, her head right beside a large elm. Jimmy frowned as Doc continued to speak. “That would be more of a bruise type injury. I would have expected less bleeding and more swelling.” The front of Claudia’s dress had been covered with blood. “What Claudia had was a laceration, a cut.” “A cut?” Jimmy exclaimed. “Couldn’t a tree branch or a sharp rock cause that?” “It could have,” the doctor agreed reluctantly. “But if you ask me and I’ve seen a number of these kinds of injuries, especially after saloon brawls, it looks like she was hit on the head with the butt of a gun.” “Someone attacked Claudia, deliberately?” Jimmy had trouble even fathoming the thought. What kind of person attacked a child? “I wanted you to know,” Doc said. “You’re pretty close to the Mortons, I’d suggest that you continue to remain close, just in case it was a deliberate attack.” ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ Later that evening, Jimmy dried the dishes Abby handed him, as he awaited her response. He had just told her about Doc’s theory, that Claudia was hit on the head with the butt of a gun. “You think Doc might be wrong?” she said finally. “There ain’t no reason for someone to try to hurt Claudia.” Jimmy pulled her into his arms. “Sometimes you just can’t explain why folks do what they do.” Abby rested her head against his chest. She didn’t want to believe that someone hurt Claudia deliberately, for two reasons. One that meant there was a madman out there and two, she was wrong again. No wonder Claudia didn’t trust her enough to tell her about Carl. Because when her daughter did open up, her own mother didn’t believe her. Chapter Forty Jimmy looked at Teaspoon, awaiting his response. He had told the marshal yesterday about Doc’s theory, that Claudia was attacked. And as soon as he heard the news, Teaspoon had sent a few wires out, asking about similar crimes against children. And today, he sent his other deputy, Beau Tolliver, out to ask Doc and the teacher, Miss Hughes, if any other children were hurt in a suspicious manner or frightened by strangers. But Jimmy wanted more. “Marshal!” Beau ran in. “Kendall Smith just said he saw Lester Barton sniffing around his place.” “So?” Teaspoon said impatiently. “Well, when I was talking to Miss Hughes yesterday, she told me that Greta Smith was complaining about someone following her to school. She never got a good look at him. But -” Teaspoon frowned. Lester was the town riffraff but as far as Teaspoon knew Lester had never attacked anyone. Sleeping off drunken binges under the schoolhouse steps was as bad as Lester got or at least that was what they had all thought. He opened his mouth to voice his doubts. But it was too late. Jimmy had already jumped to his feet and together he and Beau brought the man in. Teaspoon saw the relief in Jimmy’s face. He thought it was over now, but Teaspoon couldn’t shake that niggling feeling in his spine. This was too easy. Mention the boogie man and boom, he was handed one. “I didn’t do nothing, Marshal,” Lester protested feebly. The small man was curled up on the cot in the cell. “We’re just holding you here for questioning,” Teaspoon said patiently. “Heard you were hanging around the Smith place.” Lester snorted. “Smith makes some mighty fine gin.” He looked around furtively. “I just took a couple of bottles,” he added plaintively. “What about his little girl, Greta?” Lester looked at him, befuddled. Teaspoon sighed. He had his doubts about Lester and this conversation only furthered them. Lester had no idea what was going on. “I’m gonna keep you here for a little while longer. I wanna talk to the teacher and Greta ‘bout this ‘fore I let you go.” “I didn’t do nothing, Marshal,” Lester protested once more. “You’re safer in here than you are out there,” Teaspoon informed him. When Lester was brought in, an angry mob had begun to gather outside. Damn Beau and his big mouth. Small Knife put his hand over his eyes, shielding them from the sun, which hung low in the sky. He was still waiting for Carrie to come out of the schoolhouse. And when he saw her, he couldn’t stop the smile from spreading across his face. “Maybe she could look through wanted posters,” Teaspoon suggested, leaning back in his office chair, stroking his chin. “She said the boogie man pushed her and I didn’t believe her.” Jimmy could just kick himself. Sure all children suffered from bouts of fancy, but this was his Claudia. He knew that girl. She wouldn’t make up a story just for attention. She might pull a crazy stunt, like run away in the freezing cold, but making up tall tales wasn’t her style. Teaspoon shook his head. Jimmy was far too close to the girl to think clearly. Carrie smiled back. “Thought Doc was taking you and Ethan out on his rounds today.” Every week, Doc Mathews made a wide loop around Rock Creek. The trip took a full day. “Got lucky, Missus Andrews fever broke and Mister Stubbing’s back wasn’t acting up, so...” Small Knife continued to grin. He took Carrie’s arm when she reached the bottom step. “Interested in taking a ride with me?” he asked. “Miss Rachel asked me if I’d like to bring you to supper,” Carrie said. Small Knife’s heart dropped and he suddenly felt very, very nervous. He thought he had a few more days. He had wired Buck the other day, to tell him about his intentions toward Carrie and Buck had wired back immediately, saying he would be there as soon as possible. It was that statement, as soon as possible, that made Small Knife start to worry. What was the hurry? Was Buck worried about Ryan’s reaction? “Don’t worry,” Carrie said with a roll of her eyes. “I already broke the news to her.” “What news?” Small Knife asked innocently. “That I’m running off to join the circus,” Carrie retorted. “You’d make an adorable clown.” Carrie stamped her foot impatiently. “Don’t you wanna know what she said?” “Yeah,” Small Knife replied softly, his nervousness growing once more. “She said she knew it was gonna happen sooner or later.” Carrie beamed at him. “If she knew then maybe my pa knows.” She too was worried. Ryan could make this very difficult as he knew about Small Knife’s plans to move back to the reservation. And even Carrie was slightly apprehensive about life on the reservation, but she was a firm believer that what was meant to be was meant to be. Small Knife took Carrie’s braid and brushed it against her cheek. So many what ifs. “I’m glad it happened.” Carrie had always brought something special into his life. And he knew her spunk would serve her well on the reservation. He almost wanted to watch her take down the thieves who had swindled members of his tribe out of their land. And there was so much she could teach the children. She would be the teacher who let them keep their ways. Suddenly he pulled her into his arms and kissed her. Most importantly, she would be his wife. “What was that for?” Carrie asked, catching her breath. “Just remembered how much I love you,” Small Knife told her. If he had ever sat back and looked at the situation, he would have known that he had always loved her. Carrie flushed. This was the first time he had ever said those words to her. She brushed his chest with her fingertips. “I love you too.” As they began to walk to the MacCallister home, Small Knife remembered what he wanted to tell her earlier, knowing how worried she was about Claudia. “They caught Claudia’s boogie man.” Carrie stopped walking. “What?” “Doc told me today that Claudia wasn’t injured by a tree. She was hit on the head with a gun butt.” Claudia was right all along, Carrie thought. “Who was it?” she asked. “Lester Barton,” Small Knife answered. “Lester Barton!” Carrie exclaimed. “Really?” Small Knife nodded. “Seems as if he was sneaking around the Smith place and Greta Smith said someone was following her to school the other day.” “Lester Barton,” Carrie mused out loud. Claudia had said the man was big. But Lester couldn’t be considered big, not even in a child’s eyes. Lester wasn’t even as tall as she was. Carrie regarded Small Knife solemnly. “I don’t think it was Lester.” She made up her mind to talk to Greta tomorrow. Chapter Forty-One “Jimmy,” Teaspoon said, watching Lester thoughtfully, the next day. “There’s some kind of ruckus at the hotel. Can you go over there and tend to it?” Jimmy rose to his feet. He would have preferred to question Lester, but as Teaspoon had reminded him over and over again, he was too close to the situation to be objective. He knew Beau would be talking to the Smiths again, so he might as well go see about the matter at the hotel. Maybe he could stop by and see Cook when he was through. And about an hour later, he did exactly that. “Morning, Deputy Hickok,” Cook called out cheerfully. She gave him the once over. “What’s got you looking so glum. I thought you caught the fella who hurt Claudia.” “Nothing,” Jimmy muttered. “I just threw out your unruly guest in room 105.” “And came to pay me a visit to boot.” Cook cackled with glee. “I missed you,” Jimmy said teasingly. “Don’t try your charms on me, young man,” Cook scolded him. “I know you’re spoken for.” She studied his face. He looked awful down for someone who was in love. “It ain’t going so good?” she asked. She set a glass of milk and a plate full of cookies on the counter across from Jimmy. “Truth be told, I’m not sure how it’s going,” Jimmy replied, diving into the cookies and milk, feeling rather like he was eight years old again. He went on to explain the awkwardness he had been feeling of late. “You two need an evening together,” Cook announced. “Alone. You take her to bed and make sure she knows exactly how you feel about her.” Jimmy grinned. Cook’s answer to everything was going to bed. And right now it was as good a thought as any. “And what do you propose I do with Claudia?” “She has friends, don’t she?” Cook retorted. Jimmy looked at her and his eyes showed her that he was warming to the idea. “I’ll even make you a basket filled with Abby’s favorites to boot,” Cook added. After Jimmy’s talk with Cook he went straight to the McCloud ranch. “Lou,” he called out. “I have a favor to ask you.” ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ Abby stood outside the schoolhouse, waiting for Claudia. This was probably the only day she was going to be able to do this, walk her daughter to and from school, as Mr. Traynor had told her she had to return to work or lose her job. “Abby,” Lou called out, pulling her wagon to a stop. “How are you?” She jumped down and came to stand beside her. “And I heard Claudia is back in school. That’s wonderful.” “We’re fine,” Abby answered. “Thank you so much for all the food you have sent us. You’ve made this so much easier on us.” All of Jimmy’s family had, the marshal and his wife, Kid and Lou, the MacCallisters. Abby never knew what it was like to have real family support until now and she would be forever grateful to them all. “Ma,” Claudia cried out happily as she ran down the schoolhouse steps to hug her. “How was school, sweetie?” Abby asked. “Great.” Claudia began happily chattering about all the welcome back cards the other children had given her. Abby soon felt a tug on her skirt. “Missus Morton,” Mary McCloud said. “You think Claudia could sleep over at my house tonight?” “I don’t know,” Abby began. “Doc said she needed to get her rest.” Lou put a hand on her daughter’s shoulders. “You do too,” she smiled. “Take it easy tonight. I’ll make sure Claudia doesn’t do too much and both girls will be asleep by eight.” She looked sternly at the two girls, who were watching Abby with shining eyes. “Oh please, Ma,” Claudia begged. “I’ll listen to Missus McCloud. I won’t do too much or run around and get tired. Please. Natalie even said she would help me with my spelling. Please?” “Please Missus Morton,” Mary chimed in. “I got a new dollhouse I wanna show Claudia. And playing dolls won’t make her too tired. Please?” “But -” Abby protested. “It’s no trouble,” Lou said quickly. “And I’ll send for you and doc if anything comes up. Anything at all.” Abby laughed. She knew when she was outnumbered. “Alright, alright.” Chapter Forty-Two “Greta,” Carrie called out before the girl ran outside. “Hold on a second.” “Yes, Miss MacCallister,” Greta said dutifully. “I just wanted to ask you how you were doing,” Carrie said. “It must have been pretty scary having Lester following you.” “Yes ma’am, it was,” she answered seriously. Carrie frowned as she studied the girl. Then it struck her, Greta was Claudia’s age, she had the same dark hair and had approximately the same build as Claudia, but Greta’s eyes were blue . So whoever went after Claudia might have mistaken Greta for her. “Do you think you can answer a few questions for me?” Carrie asked carefully. Greta nodded. “Do you remember when this happened?” “The night of the spelling bee,” Greta whispered. “I was coming back to school ‘cause I lost my slate. My pa was pretty mad when I lost my bonnet so I didn’t want him to know about my slate.” Carrie felt a knot grow in the pit of her stomach. That was the night someone attacked Claudia. “Did you see who was following you?” “No,” Greta said softly. “It was too dark.” “You think it was Lester Barton?” “I don’t know. But my pa caught him by my house the other day.” Greta blinked back the tears. “You think he was after me?” Carrie gave the girl a quick hug. “No, I don’t think so.” “I told Deputy Tolliver all this too,” Greta said. “He said I might have to testify. You think I’ll have to?” “You might,” Carrie answered somberly. Testifying in court would be a frightening experience at any age. “But I’m sure if you tell the truth, everything will be just fine.” She held Greta’s hand as they walked out of the schoolhouse. “You want me to walk you home?” “No.” Greta pointed to a big boy waiting by a tree. “My brother Tommy is gonna walk with me from now on.” She ran down the steps. “See you tomorrow Miss MacCallister.” “See you,” Carrie remarked absently. She was wondering if she could get in to talk to Lester, find out where he was the night of the bee. She knew Beau Tolliver. He had been three years ahead of her in school and even then he had never had much patience. If Beau thought Lester was guilty, he wouldn’t bother looking for anyone else. Chapter Forty-Three Abby stepped out of the tub and wrapped the towel around herself after enjoying a long, luxurious bath. It wasn’t often that she was able to do this. She held herself still when she heard the door open and close. Jimmy soon appeared in her bedroom, carrying a basket. Jimmy gave her a grin, his eyes glinting. Abby smiled back at him. “Claudia’s staying the night at the McClouds.” And that was enough for him. Jimmy dropped the basket and pulled Abby into his arms. Abby wrapped her arms and legs around him and hung on as they tumbled onto the bed. “I left the bath water in there for you,” she said teasingly. “Oh yeah?” Jimmy asked, throwing the towel that separated him from Abby onto the floor. “I’m all fresh and clean.” Abby ran her hand down Jimmy’s bare chest as he had just discarded his shirt and the top of his longjohns. “And look at you.” Jimmy didn’t even bother to answer her. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ Abby reached into the basket and took out one of the pastries Cook had sent. “I didn’t know you rode for the Pony Express. Your books never said so.” She giggled when Jimmy rubbed his stubby cheek against her. “The books got it wrong,” he informed her. “They got that wrong and they thought I ran into a man named McCanles in Rock Creek. I did run into him, but that was in Squaw Creek.” “You shot a man over a woman there?” Abby asked softly. “That happened in Sweetwater,” Jimmy said. “But I didn’t shoot anyone. I got framed by a fella named Gentry. He and his wife made it look like she was being beat and I tried to help her.” When Abby continued to look at him expectantly, he added, “I was young, I thought I was in love.” The remark was made almost flippantly. Things had changed, he no longer had stars in his eyes, especially about women, and dreams were for children. But as his hand grazed Abby’s bare thigh, he found himself having new dreams, dreams that were almost staid compared to those of his youth. Dreams of a wife, a home and children. “So you weren’t?” Abby asked carefully. “I love you,” Jimmy replied kissing her, letting his hand brush against the collar of his shirt Abby wore. He hadn’t even bothered to dress. For a picnic in bed, a sheet was plenty. Abby smiled, her cheeks flushed with pleasure. Jimmy took her hand and entwined his fingers with hers. “And I wanna marry you.” Abby shook her head. “Jimmy,” she began. “You don’t love me?” he asked, hearing the hesitation in her voice. “I love you,” Abby said quickly. “More than I could have ever even imagined.” Of that there was no doubt. “So what’s the problem?” “No problem. I’m just not sure.” “About me?” Jimmy asked quietly. “No,” Abby frowned. “About me.” “You ain’t sure how you feel ‘bout me?” “I love you.” “You love me. I’m practically living here,” Jimmy half-shouted, his face filling with frustration. “But you won’t marry me!” “I didn’t say - won’t. Just not yet.” “And why not?” Abby brushed her fingers against his face. “Every decision I have made about a man has been wrong. With Richard, I thought with my heart; with Carl I thought with my head. And both times it turned out badly. I can’t afford to make another mistake.” “So I’m a mistake,” Jimmy snapped. Abby sighed. He was deliberately misunderstanding her. “You’re the one thing I can count on.” She kissed him. “Just please don’t push me, not now.” Jimmy scowled, rolling away from her. Abby reached into the basket and pulled out another pastry. “Here,” she said, offering Jimmy a bite, knowing he was angry. “A peace offering.” “I ain’t hungry anymore.” Abby waved the pastry under his nose. “Just one bite,” she said, her tone wheedling. Jimmy grabbed her wrist and took a large bite, the creme spilling out over his stomach. “Now look what you did.” He reached to wipe the creme off him. Abby held his fingers and licked the creme off him. Slowly her mouth moved over him. “You ain’t gonna kiss your way out of this,” Jimmy told her. And he could hear his voice growing softer and softer. “I’m asking you to marry me and you...” Then he stopped. Abby’s kisses had driven all thoughts out of his mind. Drop me a note and let me know what you thought!