TOW The Hot Tub





OKAY, YOU KNOW THE DRILL. I DON’T OWN THESE CHARACTERS, MARTA, DAVID, AND KEVIN DO. I MAKE NO MONEY FROM THIS, I GET NOTHING IN RETURN. THOUGH IF YOU’D LIKE, YOU COULD SEND DONATIONS, SO THAT I CAN BUY A BETTER COMPUTER…J/K. I, SERIOUSLY, GET NOTHING IN RETURN. ALL YOU NEED TO KNOW IS THAT ROSS AND RACHEL ARE STILL TOGETHER, AND EVERYONE ELSE IS SINGLE…

[Scene: Monica and Rachel’s. Joey, Ross, and Chandler are helping them move a hot tub out on the balcony, where they assemble it, and then hook it up to some type of water line. Don’t ask me how it got there, it just appeared…]

Chandler: Okay, this baby is totally plugged in!

Monica: It’s ready?!

Joey: Yup.

Rachel: Okay, everybody go change into your swimsuits and get back here ASAP!

(AN: I have no idea about the technicalities of installing a hot tub. For all I know it takes years to install one, but in my fic, it only takes five minutes, okay? Live with it.)

(TIME LAPSE…twenty minutes later, everyone is back in Monica and Rachel’s living room. They are all dressed in swimming attire… The girls in bikinis, the guys in trunks.)

Monica: Okay, everyone’s here. Let’s go!

(They all exit through the window and get into the hot tub.)

All: Oh! This is nice! This feels so good! (They are sitting in this order: Ross, Rachel, Phoebe, Joey, Chandler, Monica.)

(They all sit around, smiling at each other…)

TIME LAPSE…The only people left in the hot tub are Ross and Rachel, everyone else has gone home. Ross and Rachel are making out, and then we’ll leave them alone, because I don’t have the talent or the experience to write what they do next…but you all know what it is…so use you’re imaginations.

[Scene: The hot tub. Monica and Joey are the only ones there. There’s a clock sitting on the tub.]

Joey: Hey, Mon? What’s with the clock?

Monica: Well, I’ve been spending all my free time out here, so I need a clock out here so that I know what time it is so that I’m not late for anything.

Joey: Oh. Hey, look. There’s Chandler!

(We see that Chandler has entered Monica’s apartment, and is one his way to the window to come out to the hot tub. He is in swimming trunks.)

(Chandler exits the window, and is now on the balcony with Joey and Monica, about to get in the tub. We see Chandler catch Joey’s attention, and then wink. Joey winks back.)

Joey: Hey, man.

Monica: Hey, Chandler.

Chandler: Hey.

Joey: (Glances at clock.) Oh, I gotta go. I got a date in like, an hour.

Monica: Okay, bye, Joey.

Chandler: Bye, Joe.

(Joey gets up and leaves.)

Joey: (Whispering in Chandler’s ear as he passes him.) Good luck, man.

Chandler: (To Monica, obviously, since Joey just left…sorry for stating the obvious…) So. Just me and you, huh?

Monica: Yeah.

Chandler: So, how was work today?

Monica: Fine, I guess…work sucks.

Chandler: What, and I don’t know this?

Monica: Sorry, I forgot who I was talking to…

Chandler: It’s quite alright…

Monica: So, uh, how are…things?

Chandler: What things?

Monica: Oh, you know…your life?

Chandler: Well, I guess it’s okay, but can I talk to you?

Monica: About anything!

Chandler: And you promise you won’t laugh?

Monica: Of course!

Chandler: Well…this is really hard to talk about…

Monica: Go ahead, Chandler…(She takes his hand and gives it a light squeeze…) It’s me…Monica…you can talk to me about anything…

Chandler: Okay…Monica…(She looks at him like Janice does in TOW the Candy Hearts, when he’s about to break up with her, and he’s like… ”Janice”… ”Janice”…) Monica…wow, this is harder that I thought…

Monica: You can do it…just close your eyes, open your mouth, and let the words flow…

Chandler: (Takes a deep breath and he closes his eyes.) Monica, for about two years now, I’ve been keeping a secret from everyone but Joey. From most of my best friends. But most of all, I’ve kept that secret from you. And I guess that that little secret is the reason why I’m so nervous. So…here goes. For the past two years, I’ve uh, (sighs) God, this shouldn’t be so hard!

Monica: (Squeezes his hand.) Come on, Chandler. You can tell me. Just say it. You’ve what?

Chandler: (Mumbling, but it’s still audible.) I’ve had a…crush on you.

Monica: You have?

Chandler: Yeah. For Gods sakes, Mon. I’m not sure, but I think I’m in love with you…

Monica: Wow…I never realized…

Chandler: It’s not like I didn’t drop enough hints!

Monica: What hints?

Chandler: Remember the beach? (Author’s Note: Yeah, I know, TOW at the Beach happened while Ross and Rachel were broken up, and in my Fic, they are still together, so theoretically, the beach should’ve never happened, but I’m the writer, not you, so get over it or write your own Fics. That’s what I did and you are reading the wonderful product of that. Anyway, the beach still happened, minus Ross’ girlfriend at the time and the “which door did he choose” drama.) Or when Ben was born?

Monica: You were serious then?

Chandler: Of course I was…I don’t know how anyone could not mean those things to you…you’re perfect.

Monica: Wow…uh, come here…

Chandler: Why?

Monica: Just do it…

Chandler: Okay…

(Monica puts her hand on his face, then she leans over and kisses him…they start getting into it, and that’s when we see the door to Monica’s apartment open(we can see it through the window…) and Ross enters…(Oh, dear God…not “Red Ross”! “The Rage” is back!))

Ross: What the…Oh, ew!

Monica: (Breaking the kiss.) Oh, God.

(Ross runs to the window and climbs out.)

Ross: What are you two doing!?

Monica: Uh…Ross…we were…uh…

Ross: Okay, I know WHAT you were doing, the question is why!

Chandler: Uh…

Ross: I don’t want to hear it from you…you…(Obviously at a loss for word and names to call him.) you…sister…taker…advantage…of-er…

Monica: (Laughing.) What? You think he took advantage of me? God, Ross. You are so stupid! I kissed him!

Ross: But what about the others? Huh? Huh?!

Monica: There were no others…but, Ross…there’s gonna be a lot more, so you better get used to it. I like him… a lot And I think he loves me…

Chandler: (Monica looks at him.) I do…I really do. (The smile at each other and lean in for a kiss…)

Ross: Oh, ew!

Monica: Oh, like you should talk! You and Rachel…well, I won’t say what you did out here!

Ross: How did you know about that?!(Sounds kinda like he did in “TOW The Rumor” after he finds out about the rumor Rachel started about him in high school.)

Monica: She’s my roommate and my best friend…we tell each other everything!

Ross: Well…look, we’re off the subject. We’re talking about you two…

Chandler: Ross, can I talk to Mon alone for a second?

Ross: Are you gonna tell her that you just wanna stay friends?

Chandler: Uh, no…just let me talk to her!

Ross: Oh, alright.

(Ross goes back through the window and into the apartment…he tries at first not to listen or watch, but eventually he goes to the window and stands there listening…)

Chandler: Monica, I love you. And I know this is gonna sound crazy, but I already know that one day, providing you say yes, that you and I will get married. But I know that it’s way to soon for that, which is why it sounds so crazy. But for the time being, I hope that you’ll let me be your boyfriend.

Monica: You already know my answer. I already told you I like you…a lot…I mean, I just…I’m not sure if I’m ready to say that I love you yet, but I’m definitely your girlfriend… I feel like I’ve been that for years, but now it’s official…

Chandler: Good…and it’s okay if you can’t say that you love me yet…I know that you will if you don’t now, so…it’s fine.

(They kiss, and after seeing and hearing this, we see Ross exit the apartment. Monica and Chandler keep kissing and…do what Ross and Rachel did in that very hot tub the night before…)

[Scene: Central Perk. Rachel and Phoebe are sitting around, sipping coffee, when Ross comes storming in.]

Ross: YOU GUYS ARE SO NOT GONNA BELIEVE WHAT I HAVE TO TELL YOU!

Phoebe: And hello, to you too, Ross…

Ross: (Hurriedly.) Hi. Anyway, GUESS WHAT!

Rachel: What’s wrong, sweetie?

Ross: Everything. How could this happen? I mean, it’s crazy…they’ll never last because he’s…him. And then we’ll have to pick up the pieces of her heart when he breaks it!

Rachel: Who will never last?

Ross: Monica and Chandler…

Phoebe: MONICA AND CHANDLER?!

Ross: Yeah. I caught ‘em makin’ out. He said that he loved her and she said she’d go out with him…can you believe it?

Rachel: Oh, my God! This is the best news since “The Brady Bunch” got canceled!

Ross: What? Do you know what you’re saying?

Rachel: I’m saying that I’ve been noticing that there was…more between them, but neither one of them knew it.

Ross: Are you serious?

Rachel: Yeah, sure…I mean, remember at the beach, when he offered to be her boyfriend? Or when Ben was born? When he offered to marry and have kids with her when they’re forty? I think he’s had a crush on her for awhile now…

Ross: Oh, my God! You’re right. God…I know what it’s like to love someone for a long time and have to keep it a secret…I shouldn’t have gotten mad…

Phoebe: No…you shouldn’t have.

Ross: Uh…I’m gonna go talk to them.

(He exits.)

[Scene: Joey and Chandler’s. Joey’s sitting in one of the barca loungers. Chandler enters.]

Joey: So? How’d it go?! I want details!

Chandler: I have a girlfriend!

Joey: She said yes?

Chandler: Yup. She kissed me and we kept kissing, then…we…did it!

Joey: Way to go!

Chandler: I know! Score one for the Chan-Chan-Man!

Joey: Wow. This is so great!

Chandler: I’m in love man…

Joey: She said she loved you?

Chandler: Well, no…she said she wasn’t ready to say that yet, but I mean, I understand, she’d only know I loved her for five minutes…but it’s okay…cuz I know one day she’ll say it back. I know she will.

(Ross enters.)

Ross: Hey you guys. Chandler? Can I talk to you?

Chandler: Sure…

(They exit to the hall.)

Ross: I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have yelled at you. I know what it’s like to have feelings for someone and have to hide them…I should have been happier for you two. And I am.

Chandler: Really?

Ross: Yeah.

(They hug and the screen fades black.)

(AN: This is not the original form of this fic. Originally, Monica immediately said she loved Chandler, but the more I read that, the stupider it sounded. She would not know that yet. So, I did some serious revisions, which is why the dialog’s a little sketchy, because some lines have been altered.)





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