(Beth's room at the Boarding House: The night before Valentine’s Day. Packages from her shopping trip with Alex cover the bed. Lujack is looking through them. Beth is inside her closet—with the door closed—trying on a new dress.)
Lujack: (looking though the boxes)
C’mon! You didn’t get me anything at all?
Beth: (from inside the closet)
Nope!
Lujack:
Did you get me a belt or anything?
Beth:
Nope!
Lujack:
Are you coming out soon or what?
Beth:
Okay, are you sitting down?
Lujack:
No.
Beth:
Well, sit down. Please!
Lujack: (sits in a chair by the wall)
Okay, I’m sitting down.
Beth:
Um, are your eyes closed?
Lujack:
Are my eyes closed? (He closes them.) Okay—go ahead.
(Beth emerges from the closet wearing a white dress with black polka dots and stands in front of him.)
Lujack:
Can I open them now or what?
Beth:
Okay. (She twirls around to show him the dress.) You like?
Lujack: (lukewarm)
Yeah—it’s nice.
Beth:
But…what? Is something wrong? Is my zipper zipped?
Lujack:
Oh, no—it’s fine. It looks great. It’s just…I’d rather see you in that hot evening dress you’ve got over there (points to the bed).
Beth:
Oh, no. You’re not seeing me in that one until Valentine’s Day.
Lujack:
Oh, come on. Why not?
Beth:
You’re mother’s throwing us a party. I’ll wear it for you then.
Lujack:
Well, I guess something that good is worth waiting for. (He gets up and puts his arms around her.) Meanwhile, why don’t we have our own private Valentine celebration right now?
Beth:
You mean like this? (They kiss passionately.) Do you know what else your mother bought me?
Lujack:
What?
Beth:
The most beautiful negligee you’ve ever seen.
Lujack: (eyes widen)
You don’t say. I think I’d rather have you model that instead. (Teasing smile)
Beth: (laughs)
Nice try.
Lujack:
Aw, come on. Hey, you can tie me up in that chair over there. (Laughs)
Beth: (laughs)
No way! You’re not seeing me in that number till our wedding night! (Lujack looks disappointed.) Oh, come on! I’m saving it for my trousseau.
Lujack: (walks across the room)
I’m doing an awful lot of waiting these days, I’ll tell ya.
Beth:
Well, I’m waiting too! By the way, when do you think you’re gonna be able to afford the engagement ring we picked out?
Lujack:
Oh, a few months maybe—a year tops.
Beth:
A year? A year?
Lujack:
Why? Are you as impatient as I am?
Beth: (smiles)
Come here. (She holds out her hand. He takes it and she leads him to the dresser to look into the mirror.) Now, take a good look. Those aren’t two separate people—that’s a couple. We’re Mr. and Mrs. Luvonaczek. And it’s time we made it official.
Lujack: (leans down to kiss her hand and notices something on her dresser)
What’s this?
(Beth grabs the container and shoves it into a drawer.)
-[COMMERICAL]-
Lujack:
Those things you put in there—those were birth control pills, weren’t they?
Beth: (shyly nods her head)
Yes. I love you, Lujack—more everyday. When I’m with you, I just want to hold you and never let go.
Lujack:
Yeah, I feel the same way Beth.
Beth: (shyly)
I want to make love with you. (She looks down to the floor.)
Lujack:
I know sweetheart. I feel the same way, but I don’t—
Beth: (interrupts)
I don’t want to wait a year.
Lujack:
No, it won’t be a year—I promise.
Beth:
No, see, I want to give you all my love—in every way.
Lujack:
You wanna hear somethin’ funny? I still can’t believe that you’re with me. I can’t believe that you actually love me back.
Beth:
I know. That’s why I want to show you.
Lujack:
I never thought that I deserved you.
Beth:
Now, that is funny. Because you’re stuck with me.
Lujack:
Beth, you came into my life and you showed me something that was missing that I never knew was missing. You showed me how to love somebody special—in a special way. And I wanna give you something back that’s very special.
Beth:
Oh?
Lujack:
Yeah. I want to give you the perfect wedding night. I want it to be so perfect that it’ll make all our waiting worthwhile.
-[COMMERICAL]-
Beth:
We can get married tonight!
Lujack:
No way, Beth! Come on! I want to give you the best wedding in the world—in the biggest church in Springfield.
Beth:
Really?
Lujack:
Yeah.
Beth:
Somehow, I didn’t picture you the big church type. (Lujack smiles.) They’re gonna make you wear a bow-tie you know?
Lujack:
Oh, who cares about that stuff. It’s just that runnin’ off with you, I feel like I’m stealing you or something. I want to share this feeling with the whole world.
Beth: (nods)
Mama would never forgive us anyway.
Lujack:
I want everyone we know to be there, so they can feel how in love we are with each other—and be a part of it.
Beth:
You realize that all your other girlfriends are gonna know you’re taken?
Lujack:
Oh, who cares? Who needs them anyway. (Beth laughs.) All your old boyfriends are probably shocked that you got messed up with a guy like me.
Beth:
Well, they’re getting over it. For that matter, so am I.
Lujack:
Hey, wait a minute, what’s that supposed to mean?
Beth:
You know, well, you’re just not the type of guy that I expected to marry—all moody and impulsive about love. I always thought I wanted a Prince Charming.
Lujack:
Oh! So now I’m not charming?
Beth:
No—no! Yes, you are—when you want to be. (She smiles.) It’s just that you’re not a professional. You’re not some smooth guy with a polished act. I like that.
Lujack:
You must mean like Phillip.
Beth:
Yeah, he was like that. But I know what you say comes right from your heart. I know who I’m giving myself to.
Lujack: (walking back over the dresser)
I want to ask you something.
Beth:
Sure.
