Turn On, Tune In, Cop Out
Part Five
By Triggersaurus
catherine@cjtrigg.freeserve.co.uk

Disclaimer: they're not mine

"All those in favour.all those against.well, we obviously have a clear winner.I think we've made the best decision for all concerned.We just need to decide how to go about it.We've had another couple of calls from the network and they're only going to play repeats for one more hour.We need an action plan, fast.John, I'm going to let you co-ordinate this, I' ll direct it and I want to cut all actors going in there.Just as a warning, I've been shown some pieces of tape from our cameras over the last few hours, and quite a few of our participants have been asking questions. We need to get this underway very soon, before they make any decisions of their own."

 Mr. Spielberg had spoken, and having made the decision the room flurried into action.Writers gathered in a clump with John Wells, and the technical services people collaborated with the director.With ten minutes to spare, they all vacated the office and made their way over to a massive warehouse, covered with advertising boards.

As Dave left the lounge in search of Cleo, sent on a mission to get those tox screen results, he almost wiped out Kerry, on her way in.

"Whoa Chief.Watch out.Have you seen Dr. Finch?"

"Oh sorry, Malucci.Um, no, I don't think so."

"You okay, Chief?"

"Is Mark still in there?"

"Yeah." He watched her go into the lounge, before turning back to the ER and heading off towards the trauma rooms.

In the lounge, Kerry sat down."Mark, something is definitely very odd.I' m not sure this is a joke anymore, I don't."

"Kerry?"Mark was stumped by this behaviour. "What's wrong?"

"All our patients are gone.Every single one.And there are no more coming in - the MICN's dead."

"What?" Carter said, confused.

"You heard me.Go and see.No-one there."

"Wh... why?"

"I don't know, Mark!If I knew there wouldn't be a problem!"

Dave burst into the room.

"Everyone's gone!That girl, your stalker, I can't find her anywhere!"

"We know, Dr. Malucci."

"Chief?"

"I know all the patients are gone. And no, I don't know why."

"Well, if it helps I got those results and that kid wasn't on anything - unless you count Pepsi."

"Accounts for the hyperactivity.but not for what she said." Mark stopped, and whipped around to look in the top corner of the room.Sure enough, one of the small closed circuit television cameras blinked at him.He squinted at it, peering nearer.Reaching up, he moved his hand back and forth.The camera followed the movement.He stretched, and grabbed the camera and yanked it right off the wall, leaving little fragmented wires dangling. Bringing it down closer, he examined the side.A sticker read 'Smithson Specialty Security Services'.Before he could do anything else, Davegrabbed the camera, and looked at the sticker.Without pausing, he began to scrape the edge of the sticky surface, peeling it back bit by bit.It ripped in places, but after persistence it came off to reveal a small badge, and, written in ultraviolet ink to prevent stealing, 'Actual Reality Productions'.The four doctors looked hard at it, and slowly raised their head to meet eyes.A short rapping at the door disturbed them.

"And that's the truth.the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, as they say!"

John Wells laughed a little, but wasn't joined in his merriment.Before him sat Peter Benton, Kerry Weaver, Cleo Finch, Dave Malucci, Mark Greene, Luka Kovac, Elizabeth Corday, Lydia, Haleh, Malik, Yosh, Chuny, Lily, and other members of the emergency room staff at County Hospital.Behind him in a row sat Carol Hathaway, Susan Lewis, Doug Ross, Maggie Doyle, Anna DelAmico, and many other familiar faces from the past.The stunned looks on those in front were mirrored in the grim faces of the faces behind. Peter Benton was the first to speak."So let me get this straight.You guys created this false environment and filmed us 24 hours a day, seven hours a week and televised it?For seven years?We've all been duped into thinking this is reality?"

"Mm hmm, yes."

Peter sat back, an ironic smile of disbelief playing on his lips.Luka raised one hand slightly, and questioned, "So.this whole place.my home, everyone's homes and this part of the city.we're all actually in a warehouse?Even the weather?And the sky?"

"Yup.It's considered quite a feat of modern engineering and technology. We have at least one hundred people monitoring the conditions and settings at all times of the day and night."He smiled, obviously proud of this achievement, but again failed to receive any in return.

"I thought that you'd like to hear from some of these guys," he gesticulated at the people behind him, "let them tell you about it all, after all they were in your position.Susan?"

"I, ur, I'm not very good at this speaking to crowds stuff.But it is all true.I've really missed you all, but when I inadvertently found out what was going on here.I couldn't stay.It was when I went out to follow baby Suzie, I couldn't get out.Well, I did get out, but I didn't understand it, I wasn't where I thought I was.And then I met Steven.he explained it all and I couldn't really handle it and had to leave.I'm sorry.I should have said.But I couldn't, I was sworn to secrecy." She glanced at John Wells and sat down again.

"Same here, that path to destruction I took was because I found out what was going on here." Doug Ross spoke up."I wouldn't have left for any other reason.I never would have guessed this wasn't what it seemed if one of the kids hadn't let something slip, one of the kids I was treating.I know you guys must be so angry, that's how I felt.I still am, I don't think it's right and I don't think it's worth it for TV.But once I was out, I couldn't come back and tell you to get out.I only told Carol, because I could phone her and leave messages.That got cut off after a while, so I tried writing.You'd never understand how difficult it was to get in here.this whole place is a giant warehouse, security guards everywhere.Gotta give full marks to those kids who got in here today, 'cause I sure as hell couldn 't have done it."

"Well, what I want to know," Haleh got up, looking menacingly at the producer, "is what are we going to do now??We've been believing that this is our life for seven years now!Seven years!And now you tell us we were just some TV show and throw us back out into whatever is the real world! What are you going to do about it?"

There was some awkward shuffling, and Steven Spielberg emerged from the rear of the room."Perhaps I'd better take this one, John."

Mr. Wells nodded, and moved out of the way. "This show you've been involved in has been the most successful television show in the history of the world.It's has been ground breaking, and won hundreds of awards.You never knew it, but you have been part of something so huge that it is unbelievable.And we are all too aware that it is going to be very difficult when you remove yourself from this scenario.We've tried different ways of dealing with it when each of your co-workers here moved on, but whatever we do there will be problems.Your first few months will be the toughest because everyone will want a piece of you.All the talk shows, all the reporters, all the photographers, all the filmmakers, all the advertising companies.You can make your own decisions about those things.But we will provide you with homes in secret locations, more than one if those who aren't welcome locate your whereabouts.You'll be issued a percentage of what was made by this television show, your show, as a salary that should mean that you won't need to work for at least five years.We will provide security, bodyguards for the first six months.Any payments, misdemeanours, anything that happened inside the confines of this setting, will be settled, unless they are more advanced personal problems, of course. We know we're throwing you out into the deep end, so I'm willing to help you all I can."

His audience were silenced.Stunned still, shocked and probably upset, hurt, confused and angry.But they were silent.And that was all that mattered to the executives; after all they had their own lives to think of.

An angry, baying mob of irate doctors with syringes, defibrillators, scalpels and god knows what other items that could cause a great deal of pain was not what they needed.Anxious to get away, the director took his place quickly, one more time.

"We'll keep this set.setting.open for you for the rest of this week.So you can get ready to move out.I'll send people in to help, and lawyers and financial advisors for you.Please, if there are any problems, let me know. Above all, thank you.Thank you."



From the makers of "Laugher Is The Best Medicine" and "Fairy Tales of the ER".
A Doug Who? Fanfic
In association with Evil Giraffe Productions
--Turn On, Tune In, Cop Out--
Triggersaurus 2001