G et Smart Quotes |
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Agent 13: You're going to get killed tonight!Max: Tonight!?! But it's almost midnight! Agent 13: Midnight!?! Well look if I don't see you again, Happy New Year! 99: (entering the room singing) I thought you were going to lower the lights!Floyd: Why? Do you sound better in the dark? Operator: "What number are you calling?"Max: "I'm calling Control, Operator…" Operator: "You have dialed incorrectly. Give me your name and address and your dime will be refunded." Max: "Operator, I'm calling from my shoe!" Operator: "What is the number of your shoe?" Max: "It's an unlisted shoe, Operator!" 99: Oh, Max what a terrible weapon of destruction.Max: Yes. You know, China, Russia, and France should outlaw all nuclear weapons. We should insist upon it. 99: What if they don't, Max? Max: Then we may have to blast them. That's the only way to keep peace in the world.
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99: Sometimes I wish you were just an ordinary businessman.Max: Well, 99, we are what we are. I'm a secret agent, trained to be cold vicious and savage. . . . Not enough to be a businessman. Max: I'm sorry I'm late, Chief, but I was stuck in the car for almost 20 minutes.Chief: I know, Max. The traffic. Max: No, the seat belt. I can never get the darn thing unbuckled. Senator: What would you do if you were fired, Mr. Smart?Max: They can't fire me- I know too much. |
Admiral: Our chances are slim, hopeless. We're facing imminent disaster. I must go on the air and speak to the public.99: What are you going to tell them? Admiral: That everything is fine. Max: Have you got any information to report?Agent 13: You bet I do. It's a matter of life and death. Unfortunately I can't remember whose life or whose death.
Max: Ninety-nine, this ship is a freighter, right? 99: Right, Max. Max: And freighters run on fuel oil, right? 99: Right again, Max. Max: And wooden masts belong on sailboats, correct? 99: Exactly. Max: And this is a wooden mast. 99: Go on , Max. Max: Ninety-nine. . . . 99: Yes? Max: I forgot where I started. |
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